//------------------------------//
// 21. How to Celebrate Local Festivals 
// Story: Exploring Equestria 
// by A_guy_from_Earth 
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   “What?” Hidden Path could not believe in what he has just heard. The chief of Special Service came here himself to say this? “Mister Shadow, sir, having such a threat approaching our capital we can’t stay here!” he exclaimed.

Gray Shadow, old but tall and strong smoky stallion, sighed.

“I am fully aware of the degree of danger, Hid,” he said. “But, still, we need you to stay here, in Ponyville. According to your materials, we have full-scale invasion, and Ponyville is its very center. So you have to stay in the town and stop the invasion here – this one “agent” of them is the minor problem right now.”
“Sir,” Grace stepped forward. “This being was able to slay an adult dragon in one strike. It’s a murderer with monstrous power!”
“I know. That’s why I ordered two dozens of our agents constantly patrol the city. We’ll find him, be sure.”

Ponies of Second Department looked at each other, then slowly bowed to the chief.

“Yes, sir.”





Meanwhile researchers had just started to wake up. They thought that it will be usual calm day off, but their friends had other plans…

“WAKE UP!!!” loud high-pitched voice sounded throughout the house.

Researchers jumped out from their beds. Fear and shock made some of them levitate for several moments and others smash into the ceiling. It was very impressive results, considering that the room height was about ten steps and that they jumped from a prone position.

They fell down and, alarmed, run downstairs – just in time to meet 350 mm caliber cannon aiming in their faces.

“Surprise!” exclaimed Pinkie Pie and fired the confetti. Researchers got sprinkled from top to hooves.
“Eh?” they wondered.
“What does this mean?” exclaimed Affi.
“You don’t know?” surprised Pinkie Pie. “It’s First Harvest Day!”
“Oh…”

Being happy that they got a day off in the middle of the week, they completely forgot about its reason: Ponyville harvest festival, the second greatest holiday of the season after Summer Wrap-up. They had not even thought about this!

“Right!” Edez uttered. “Gosh, we completely forgot to keep track of time!”
“If so, then you must have a good calendar!” Pinkie Pie said. “I can recommend you some places where you can buy one!”
“Ehm, thank you!”
“You’re welcome! So,” she looked at all of the researchers, “are you ready for fun?”
“Sure!” Team One responded.
“Wonderful! Festival starts in forty minutes! See ya there!”

She put her party cannon back into the obscurity of another dimension that serves her as a store and merrily hopped away.

“Well, I guess we should forget about our plans for this day,” said Sheim and looked at his friends. “What now?”
“Let’s do what Pinkie said,” smiled Kor. “Let’s have fun! Today everyone in town will be celebrating and why we should not join?”
“Indeed!” Zet’rar, Bluve and Max supported him.
“If you think so…” Edez smiled. “Let’s have fun then!”
“Wait,” Karin raised her hoof and looked at Oma. “This is the first such social event that we see, shouldn’t we, I dunno, take notes?”
“You know,” senior sociologist said after short pause, “we already have all the necessary information – history and folklore books are more than enough. Don’t worry about that.”
“Just make some shots or records,” Affi offered. “It will be good factual material for the reports.”
“Okay.”

Thus, they didn’t manage to spend the entire day without a work, but it doesn’t bother them. Making a record is quick job: just walk back and forth across the festival area and look around. Implants will to the thing. A couple of hours – and you will be free for the rest of the day.

Researchers quickly did their usual morning rituals and left their house. There was a new day ahead, new wonderful day, full of adventures and thrills.

However, they didn’t expect that there adventures will start just in few seconds after when they crossed the doorsteps.

“Maud!” Sheim nervously smiled when he saw familiar gray mare from rock farm. “I didn’t know you were coming!”
“Oh, do I need a reason to spend some time with my dearest Lierre?” she dreamily sighed and made the most enchanting smile she was able for. It made her really beautiful and attractive, but, considering that she did it as she usually does things – slowly – the whole process itself looked quite creepy.
“W-well, I’m glad to see you!”
“So do I. Well, let’s enjoy the holiday together then?” she turned to Sheim’s friends. “Do you mind if I take him?”

They looked at each other, then looked at Sheim and helplessly shrugged.

“I promise, he will be just fine. He is in good hooves,” Maus said and looked at the planetologist. “Let’s go!”
“Sure!” he responded and turned to his friends. His eyes were the eyes of sentient sentenced to eternal separation of mind and body with destruction of the last. “Bye!” he weakly spelled.
“Bye!” quietly responded his colleagues.

Maud Pie took Sheim away and soon they disappeared behind the corner of the nearest house. Kor, Zet’rar, Max, Bluve and Karin slowly made the sign of the star.

“I hope we won’t see him on the Other Side…” said Kor. Other researchers gave a weak nod.

Soon, however, researchers for their own surprise found that Sheim, though he was terrified at first, now was having some good time with Maud Pie. Well, in that case they do not have to worry for him and can focus on their own recreation.

They went to the Central Square of the town, the heart of today’s celebrations, and separated. Karin and Oma began to wander around and take video records, other researchers went to look for an occupation for themselves.

Although it was called First Harvest Day, in reality it was a grand carnival that connected not only farmers, but all other citizens of town and its surroundings. Snack stalls, gist shops, attractions were everywhere in the center of the town. Streets turned into one huge arena of celebration and now were busier than ever before. Now everything in the town was made for entertainment. One pony would never have been able to take part in all the events and visit all the places during this day.

No wonder it took researchers quite a time to choose. Sometimes they followed their own desires, in other cases it was the work of the happening.

Max was walking down one of the greatest amusement alley, trying to find something suitable for his changeable mood, when he saw Spike near one prize throwing stands. He had already used two attempts, now it was his last chance. He took the last ball, took a deep breath, concentrated, threw and… failed. Large structure made of wooden bars shook a little but remained intact.

“Oh come on!” Spike exclaimed. “How can I knock this thing down?”
“Sorry, pal, can’t help,” said the owner of the stall. “Wanna try again?”   

Spike sighed and took his pouch. But now, when he put his paw into it, he found no coins.

“No bits?” stall owner said. “I’m sorry. I guess, it’s not your lucky day.”

Little dragon became even gloomier, but then…

“One bit for three attempts, I suppose?” they heard a voice.

Spike raised his head and saw Max.

“Zicht?”
“Hi, Spike,” Max responded. “Want to get something special?”
“Well, y-yeah…” little dragon nodded and pointed to small beautifully decorated wooden statuette of a dancing pony.
“It’s for your “precious gem”, right?”
“What? N-no! It’s…”
“Don’t worry. I know your problem. You will get it,” and researcher put a coin on the counter.

Owner of the stall took it and gave Max three small balls.

“Are you sure?” he grinned, pointing to the wooden construction with his eyes.
“Quite sure,” responded Max, took one ball and pushed the rest aside.

He aimed a blow, then threw and… in front of stunned stall owner and little dragon the tower collapsed like it was a house of cards. Hail of wooden bars fell on the floor.

“Here you go,” Max said and turned to the owner. “Now, if you would be so kind, I’d like to take this statuette as my prize.”

Stall owner, still surprised with the fact that his tower was ruined so easily, shook his head, took the statuette with his shaky forelegs and gave it to the researcher.

“Wow, Zicht! You made it in one attempt!” exclaimed Spike. “It took me twelve just to shake it!”
“You know,” Max said, “being a military doctor can teach you some skills.”
“Wow.”
“Oh yeah… Here,” researcher gave Spike the statuette. “After that incident at the magic show I had to repay you.”
“Th-thank you.”
“You are welcome. Good luck, my friend.”

Spike gave a nod and run away. Max smiled and, after some thinking, decided to deprive the prize throwing stall of some more stuff.

Meanwhile Bluve was studying the range of the snack stalls. Light breakfast wasn’t enough for her, so now she was looking for some additive. Luckily, since it was harvest festival, there was a great choice.

“Hey, Calma!” she heard familiar voice. She looked around and saw Applejack, waving to her, near the huge stand of Apple Family.

Biologist smiled and approached her.

“Hello, Applejack!”
“Nice to see ya here,” orange pony said. “Enjoyin’ the festival?”
“Yeah, it’s fantastic. This holiday is like a carnival in Colinia… I really like it, but…”
“But what?” surprised Applejack.

Bluve was about to say, but growling stomach treacherously betrayed her. Shy researcher immediately turned red.

“Ah see,” Applejack smiled. “Come on! There’s no better place for a hungry pony than the Apple Family stand!”
“Thank you,” Bluve smiled in response and followed her friend.

The stand consisted of some simple entertainments and large counter with different apple dishes. Although there was just one main ingredient, total diversity was impressive.

“Well, here it is!” Applejack pointed at the counter. “We have apple fritters, candy apples, apple jam and nineteen kinds of apple pies! There’re some good apple juice and cider too. Or, if ya want to have some fun, ya can catch yer meal!” she pointed at six small wooden tubs with fresh sweet apples near the counter. Several ponies has been already trying to catch themselves a fruit.

“Hmm…” Bluve rubbed her chin. “I think I’d prefer the catch game.”
“Heh, good luck then.”

Physiologist approached the nearest tub and looked in. There still were five apples, floating on the water. Perfect.

She leaned over the tub and in just few seconds stood up with an apple in her mouth. Other catchers got surprised: that mare did it without putting any efforts! Bluve, in her turn, continued, like nothing special happened. In a minute the tub was empty.

“Well, Applejack, thank you!” she said. “That was some really delicious apples!”
“How could ya do is so fast?” exclaimed surprised farmer.
“Remember the trick I showed during Trixie’s performance?”

Applejack gave a nod.

“The same is here.”
“Oh… Y’know, Calma, ya have to teach me this trick!”
“Prepare the apples then, my friend.”

Applejack smiled and brought a basket of fresh fruits. She was ready to train, and Bluve gladly taught her.

At the same time, Oma and Karin had almost finished their job: events of three fourth of the festival area were recorded, and now they had only to register the main attractions of the fair. From Central Square down the amusement alleys they went to the town park, where the greatest entertainments were organized.

Place of relaxation most days, now it was the liveliest and nosiest place in the town. Both youngsters and adult had fun, playing games, trying various attractions, taking part in different competitions or just hanging around. Ponies arrived there from the town and all its surroundings, so not rarely passages were overcrowded. And near some attractions there were not only queues of ponies who wanted to have a try, but groups of fans too.

The biggest crowd gathered near the strength test machine. A great show had been expected: two strongest stallions of Ponyville, Big Macintosh and Bulk Biceps, decided to find who is the best.

When Oma saw this, a spark of idea flashed in her mind, and wide grin formed on her face.

“Karin!” she addressed to her friend. “I’ve just had an awesome idea, and I so much want to try it, so, please, finish the work for me!”
“Why I should work while you will be idling about?” Karin resented.
“Instead I will fulfill any your request!”

Karin squinted at Oma, but then grinned and said “Deal. Go do your thing.”

“Thank you!” senior sociologist hugger her friend and ran to implement her idea.

The show had already begun. Bulk Biceps was the first. He approached the machine, warmed up a bit and bucked the target. Lead weight flew up like a rocket and almost reached the ring – only two scale marks remained before the top. White pegasus made a smug smile and looked at Big Mac. Red stallion just gave a hum and made his try. Now one scale mark remained before the ring. Smugness moved from Bulk’s face to Mac’s. White pegasus growled and demanded another round, but then gentle voice from the side made him stop.

“Excuse me, please!”

Ponies stepped aside, making way for Oma. She slowly bowed in gratitude and came closer to competitors.

“Don’t you mind if I also have a try?” she asked.

Confused stallions looked at each other, then at Oma.

“Ehm… sure!” said Bulk Biceps and together with Big Mac welcomed her.

Oma nodded and approached the machine. She carefully stretched her hind legs and then sharply bucked the target with all her might.

In a moment a loud clang came. Bilk Biceps and Big Mac dropped their jaws. Oma looked at them, wiggled her eyebrows and proudly went away.

When she almost disappeared behind the nearest stalls, one of the spectators said “Incredibly beautiful and dangerous… I like it!” And then the crowd cheered.

The holiday continued, and soon the lunchtime came. Researchers decided to gather and have a snack together. They chose the place, but it turned out that only Affi, Bluve, Karin, Oma and Zet’rar could come there in time. Why Sheim did not come was possible to understand: Maud will keep him busy for all this day. But why Edez, Kor and Max weren’t here? Researchers waited a little more and then went to look for their missing colleagues.

It seemed easy to find such giants as Kor or Edez, but in the overcrowded maze of the festival it became quite difficult to do. However, the problem was immediately solved when they heard non-equestrian speaking from the side of snack stalls.

Girls and Zet’rar found Edez, Max and Kor sitting at one of the free tables and drinking together with two mottled unicorns. These new guys looked quite odd and, at the same time, interesting: first, because of their spots they resembled Dalmatians or king cheetahs, second, they were broad-shouldered and only a few inches lower than Kor and Edez and, third, they had huge curved sharp horns, larger than even Celestia’s. Presence of researchers and loud discordant singing of europonian songs made the total sight the most peculiar thing around the festival area.

“Tu-tu-turysty, avanturysty,
“Usio pryjemna, usio karysna!
“Tu-tu-turysty, avanturysty,
“Marskija vyspy, Buena Vista!”
“What are you doing?” surprised Affi broke in.
“Oh, hi, girls, Allegro,” smiled Edez. “Meet our fellow europonians, Tryviež and Čarnabor!” he introduced the unicorns and turned to them “Guys, there are our friends, Antilipsi, Didinga, Allegro, Calma and Pippi.”
“We are glad to see you,” Tryviež, the one with longer mane and figure of three towers as a cutie mark, and Čarnabor, the tallest one and with a figure of three pines as a cutie mark, stood up and bowed.

Girls were pleasantly surprised: despite their rough and strange appearance, these guys behaved like true gentlecolts.

“We too,” girls said.
“It’s quite unexpected to see other europonians here,” said Allegro.
“For us, this is also a surprise,” said Tryviež. “And the fact that europonians managed to become a part of local royal court… That’s something incredible!”
“You know, great need for employment makes you do crazy things,” said Karin.
“True, true,” unicorns agreed.
“And how did you get here, so far from usual tourist Meccas?”
“Well,” Čarnabor began after short pause. “It all started when our chiefs ordered us to go on vacation – we had been working for seven years without any breaks, so we accumulated quite a term of free days. Seeing this, our chiefs said us ‘Go on vacation and don’t come back in the nearest six months.’ We decided to go to Equestria. We had already visited all main sightseeing, so now we are just wandering.”
“What kind of job you have then?” Oma surprised.
“We are from Dregovian Monster Control Department.”
“What?” girls exclaimed. From Team Two they knew a lot about similar organizations and their importance: an employee of such Department on vacation in Equestria sounded as shocking as a Canterlot royal guard shirking his watch.
“Yeah… Peculiarities of the national labor legislation.”
“Hey, why just about us?” Tryviež broke in and looked at the girls and Allegro. “Let’s hear about you too!”
“Fair,” said Karin and Affi.
“I suppose our boys had already told you that we all work at princess Twilight’s court?” telepathist asked.

Dregovians gave a nod.

“Well, me and Pippi are the castle maids,” she continued.
“I am the royal cook,” said Bluve.
“I am the receptionist, and my dear Allegro is the repairpony,” said Oma, embracing Zet’rar with her foreleg.

This greatly surprised Tryviež and Čarnabor.

“How you?..” they uttered, stammering.
“Had been trying for quite a time and finally reached my goal,” technician answered.

Without any words, unicorns shook Zet’rar’s hoof. Their expressions showed the highest degree of respect.

“Oh, another friend of ours is at this festival too, but…” said Kor, “he’s busy with his the most ardent admirer.”

Dregovians gave a nod of understanding and put their hooves on the hearts. But when they did it, a strange sound came from under their hooves.

“P-pardon me,” said Bluve. “But… why your rib cage is clanging?”
“Oh…” Čarnabor and Tryviež faltered. “You see… Thirty percent of our bones now are made of metal.”
“What?”
“We have a pretty dangerous job, and these are the consequences.”
“Oh…”

Meanwhile Affi had been already finishing the quick mind scan of dregovians. Turned out that they were skilled, smart and resolute fighters, the very material for Monster Control Departments, but at the same time good-temperate guys with great sense of humor and thirst for adventures. She also noted the things, which her friends had already told the new guests. They said quite a lot, but did not mention one episode. It was a good possibility to make her fellow curator a little vile thing for fun.

“Hey, Tryviež, Čarnabor, hadn’t Berg told you that he and Erő are not only princess Twilight’s personal guards, but also fill-fledged members of the Royal Canterlot Guard now too?” she said.

Dregovians chocked on their cider and looked at Edez and Kor.

“Really?” Tryviež exclaimed.
“Ehmmnyeah…” master researcher and officer muttered.
“How did it happen?” Čarnabor wondered.
“Princess Celestia asked us…” Kor began, but dregovians broke him off.
“Sviatyja padpachi galoŭnakamandujučych! Da vy zdziekvajecesia!”* they exclaimed in their native language.
“What?” researchers surprised.
“That… That’s worth drinking to!” they smiled.

Tryviež created new glasses for girls and Allegro with his magic, Čarnabor took the cider keg and started to pour sparkling gold beverage to everyone. Soon they all have full glasses, but the main vessel…

“Damn, it’s empty!” Čarnabor growled a little when he looked into the keg.
“We’ll find more later, now – for the first europonians in the Royal Canterlot Guard for many years!” smiled Tryviež and they all drank the cider.
“So, where we can find more of the stuff?” dregovians asked.
“We’ll show you,” Edez, Max and Kor answered, stood up and led the guests.

While they were going for another keg, girls decided to ask their new friends some more questions.

“Pardon me, but you are brothers, right?” asked Bluve.
“Almost. Cousins,” Čarnabor answered.
“Say, are all the members of your department so big and mighty?” wondered Karin.
“Well, you should be skilled and powerful to be a monster fighter, not just big,” Tryviež said. “But, I should admit, we are not only giants there.”
“Yep,” his friend nodded. “Our commanders, Grom and Zmrok, for example. They both are half a meter taller than we.”
“Really?”
“Yes, they are the biggest ponies in Dregova. And our four-winged are quite small…”
“Four-winged?”
“Polynovy Jar made a lot of dregovians odd,” said Čarnabor. “Our Department, for example, almost entirely consists of such ones.”
“Yeah,” Tryviež nodded. “We have seven regular alicorns, five thestral alicorns, two zebra alicorns, three horned zebras, able for magic, one zebra pegasus, three two-horned ponies, four four-winged pegasi, three winged deer, five griffins able for magic, eight dragons able for magic, three bisons able for magic, two deer able for magic…”
“… and other four are two superstrong four-winged dragons and we, mutants with huge magic hearts, which make us the strongest magic fighters in the team except our commanders.”
“Wow…”

Researchers knew that Polynovy Jar incident caused a lot of strange and peculiar things, but that strange and peculiar?..

While girls were quietly freaking out, lads found a cider sellers’ stall. Unfortunately, the sellers turned out to be the ponies they did not want to meet.

“Flim? Flam? What are you doing here?” researchers exclaimed when they saw two swindlers.
“You know these guys?” Tryviež and Čarnabor surprised.
“Yep,” Affi nodded. “They are the most unscrupulous entrepreneurs in Equestria.”
“Why so harsh?” unicorn brothers put on the masks of feigned offense. “Yes, we weren’t always honest with our customers, but not today!”
“What do you mean?” Karin wondered.
“We mean that today we are here just to sell cider and earn some money,” Flim answered.
“Yes,” Flam confirmed. “Ordinary apple cider without any additives, made by traditional methods.”

Dregovians rubbed their chins, and then Čarnabor asked “Can I try some?”

“Sure, my friend!” Flim smiled and gave him a full mug.

Čarnabor took it with his magic, took a sip and then, suddenly, winced.

“Byrla!” he exclaimed.
“Byrla?” Tryviež and researchers surprised.
“Byrla,” Čarnabor nodded.
“Byrla!” Tryviež shrugged, looking at Kor, Edez and Max.
“Tady da Epplaŭ,” Max said in Dregovian, and they went to the Apple Family stand.

Dumbfounded Flim and Flam looked at each other and muttered “Byrla?”

“That’s a Dregovian slang word,” Oma explained. “It means bad alcoholic beverage, usually made of fruits.”

And then girls left the stall too.

At the Apple Family stand lads bought three more kegs of cider. Although girls were very angry with them, master researcher, officer and senior physiologist, saying that they need a lot of the stuff since they are big, continued the fuelling together with Čarnabor and Tryviež.

Thus, girls and Zet’rar remained alone. Seeing this, Oma decided to follow Maud’s example, grabbed her lover and ran away to have some personal fun. Affi, Karin and Bluve, however, didn’t get upset because of this – when only three of them remained, they decided not to waste time and give it large. And they did.

The sun passed through the zenith and began to descend to the mountains. The evening was coming, and together with it – the main event of the festival, the music show.

The First Harvest Day Music Festival was a unique event: from the very foundation of the Festival it was stated that every pony is free to participate and could play any kinds of music. Such freedom made it attractive not only for ponyvillers, but for citizens of all Equestria. Thus, since there were many gifted ponies, it was long concert of good music.

It had started at 3 p.m. and soon greatest part of the townsfolk gathered near the stage at the Central Square. Ponies listened, enjoyed and rejoiced. There was music for all tastes: classic, country, rock, pop, techno, instrumental… Every volunteer and guest musician felt free to play his or her favorite song. However, the loudest and longest applauses got the favorite Ponyville musicians: Octavia, Vinyl Scratch, Lyra and Ponytones.

Ponytones sang a lot and managed to leave the stage only when the Sun had already touched the mountains. Musicians were tired, but glad. Their friends ran to congratulate them with successful performance. Zet’rar, Oma, Affi, Karin, Bluve and Sheim with Maud came to say some compliments too.

“You were awesome!” Rainbow Dash exclaimed.
“Great job y’all!” smiled Applejack.
“For your first time, you were great, Fluttershy!” Twilight cheered her humble friend.
“Yeah!” added Pinkie Pie. “It was amazing!”
“Thank you,” musicians said. Pink-maned pegasus shyly smiled.
“It was real pleasure to listen to you,” said Affi.
“Indeed,” Sheim and Oma nodeed.
“You were here too?” bearers of the Elements surprised when they saw the researchers.
“Almost since the beginning of the show,” answered Zet’rar. “We just stood at the far end of the square.”
“Oh, we see.”
“The folk’s still applauding to ya,” Applejack said, looking at the cheering audience.
“No more songs!” Rarity protested. “We are already tired! Just look at Big Mac!” she pointed at red stallion, who was heavily breathing now. He gave a nod as a sign of confirmation.
“Oh!” Pinkie Pie exclaimed and raised her hoof. “Guys!” she turned to researchers. “Why don’t you have a try and come up on the stage?”
“What?” members of Team One were shocked and confused by this unexpected offering.
“Hey, this is really a good idea!” Rainbow Dash supported her friend. “Come on, guys! Let everypony hear some europonian music!”
“Well… Some of us can play music instruments and sing, but…” researchers uttered, but then all other started to encourage them.

They could not bear all these pleas and persuasions and soon gave up.

“Okay, we will!” they said. Ponies got happy, especially Maud Pie.
“But first we have to find Berg, Erő and Zicht,” said Oma.
“I’ll do it!” Affi said and ran to look for her colleagues.

She found the lads just in few minutes. For her own surprise, they still were drinking at the same place.

“What are you doing?” she exclaimed when she saw nine empty bottles of apple brandy and full glasses in lads’ hooves.
“We are carrying out a very important scientific research!” said Edez.
“Yeah!” Max nodded. “We are trying to find can we get really drunk consuming local alcoholic beverages.”
“What?!”
“Calm down, my dear,” the first curator said. “Everything is fine.”
“And where are Tryviež and Čarnabor?”
“After the seventh bottle they said that all their chakras are opened now and went in the direction of Everfree Forest.”

After these words telepathist was barely able to say anything.

“What could we do? They are extremely powerful battle mages!”

Affi could no longer bear any more seconds of this, so just forced herself to spell “Come! We have a request,” and made lads follow her.

When she returned to the square, her friends were still talking with musicians and bearers of the Elements.

“Several songs?” Karin and Bluve surprised. “Well… We don’t know.”
“I do not mind,” said Oma.
“Please!” Pinkie Pie pleaded.
“If we will be really greatly asked…” Zet’rar spelled. Sheim gave a nod, and then all other agreed.
“Oh, here’re Berg, Zicht and Erő,” Applejack noticed that Affi returned with the rest of the team.
“So, what’s the problem?” asked Kor.
“Oh, we just want you to play some europonean music,” answered Rainbow Dash.
“Piece of cake.”
“Great!”
“Good luck!” said ponyvillers and went away.

Oma, Karin and Bluve approached their colleagues to ask where they have been all this time, but before they did it, they smelled eerily familiar pong.

“Wait, you are drunk?” Karin exclaimed.
“Don’t worry my dear!” Kor hastened to assure her. “Though we are thoroughly alcoholized now, we have retained the clarity of thoughts and good coordination!”
“True,” Max confirmed.
“Damn…” Oma winced. “You know that you smell like stinking drunkards?”
“That’s putting it mild,” added Bluve.
“No one will able to smell us from the stage,” Edez said.

Girls just rolled their eyes.

“Can you even play being in such condition?” Bluve asked.
“I’ll forget for sure how to play when I get sober,” answered Kor.

Biologist refrained from any comments.

So, researchers gathered and discussed what they will do. Bluve offered to split into three groups of three sentients and perform one song per group. Her friends supported this idea: it allowed everybody to show their talents and didn’t take too much time. It was perfect. Now they had to decide what songs each of them will play.

After some arguing they divided as follows: Zet’rar, Oma and Affi, Kor, Edez and Karin, Sheim, Bluve and Max. It was decided that first group will be playing house, second – modern instrumental music and third – dance pop. However, with the last item there was some problems: according to it, Bluve had to sing, so other researchers spent quite a time persuading their shy friend. Finally, Bluve agreed, and they were ready.

Researchers told about this to Twilight and Spike and they, in turn, told it to Ivory Scroll, who now was the master of ceremonies.

“And now, ladies and gentlecolts, let’s enjoy music what our europonean friends prepared for us!” mayor mare said and turned to the entrance to the stage. “Please!”

Zet’rar, Oma and Affi took a deep breath and went on the stage. Affi stood at the synthesizer, Oma – at the DJ mixer. Zet’rar addressed to the audience:

“Hello, dear friends. Today we are going to play to some songs that you probably have never heard before. The one what we will be play now was written by one awesome champian band, it is called “One more time”…”

He stood near the microphone and girls started to play. Short exclusively instrumental entrance part followed, and only then Zet’rar began to sing.

It was simple, repeating melody. Its lyrics were the simplest and had no significant sense – it was part of the rhythm, in fact. But together they created something, able to make everyone dance. Ponies of all ages, when they heard that, felt an urge to move. Combination of fantastic sounds of synthesizers and autotuned voice did miracles. This melody had been made for one ultimate aim: make you dance. And with proper performance by the researchers, this aim was achieved.

The dance euphoria lasted for five minutes. When the song eventually ended, audience was exhausted, but very glad. When Oma, Affi and Zet’rar were leaving the stage, all thousand ponies that stood on the Square applauded them.

Karin, Kor and Edez were next. As Oma before, Karin stood at the DJ mixer, but guys just took a saxophone and guitar and sat on the floor.

“Dear friends, now you will hear one famous europonean composition,” Edez said. “It is called “Lily was here”. Don’t worry, my dear, it’s just a title,” he smiled to one of the flower ponies, who greatly surprised when she heard her name. Then master researcher gave a nod to Karin, and they started.

Karin put on some usual instrumental music, and then, after some time, guys came into: at first Kor played a part on the guitar, then Edez repeated it on the saxophone. At some moments Kor stopped and Edez played solo. However, those repetitions formed the greatest part of the song. The rhythm was simple, but was very pleasant to the ear. It formed quite a contrast with previous song, but it did not spoil the general impression. In fact, it was even good to relax after the dancing and just enjoy the music.

They played for four minutes and finished with attenuation that soon turned into silence. Then the applause came. Researchers bowed to the audience and went away.

Then the last trio got up on the stage. Bluve stood in the center, Max was to her left, Sheim – to her right. Biologist nervously gulped, but forced herself to say:

“H-Hello, it’s nice to see you… The song you’ll hear now is called “Ordinary World”…” then she just bowed awkwardly and stood near the microphone. Sheim took place at the DJ mixer, Max took the guitar and sat on the floor.

The song started with instrumental part where Max and Sheim played together, Bluve came into later. This composition surprised ponyvillers: Bluve’s song was more like a ballad, but it was accompanied by modern dance rhythms primarily – only Max from time to time played short guitar solos. It sounded strange and unusual, but, at the same time, harmoniously. Intense rhythm formed surprisingly good combination with the ballad lyrics.

Audience remained very impressed and rewarded the musicians with loud applause. Max and Sheim bowed in gratitude like many other musicians before them, but poor timid Bluve was confused with such reaction. She didn’t know what to do, she didn’t know what was worse: this or total fiasco. But her friends came to rescue: they lifted her up, portraying celebration of success, and took her behind the curtains under the cheers of the audience.

The mission was accomplished, and it was quite a success: they received almost as much cheers as already famous Ponyville musicians. And this excluding the cheers what they received from their friends when they left the stage.

Some mutual gratitude, and after Rainbow Dash’s “Come, guys! Or we’ll miss the next song!” bearers of the Elements and Spike return to the audience. Researchers were about to do it too, but Karin stopped everyone.

“Before you come back, I’d like to do one thing…” she said and turned to Oma, giving her the smile which doesn’t bode anything good. “Today you said that you’ll fulfill one my request, right?” Senior sociologist gulped. “Well, here it is,” she gave her friend a list. “I know that you worked as a DJ in your university for a while, so, I’d like you to play these soundtracks.”
“Sandstorm,” “Alphabeat,” “Derezzed,” “Greyhound,” “The game has changed,” “Arguru”… Oh!..” Oma looked through the list and wailed.
“Say, where are Max, Kor and Edez?” Bluve wondered when she noticed that lads disappeared when no one was looking.
“I guess they continue their “experiment”…” Affi snorted.
“Oh…”

There was no getting away from it for Oma. She gave her word, so she had to do it. Thus, the following two hours townsfolk enjoyed brand new rhythms from DJ PON-3 and DJ D.D.

In the late evening, when the celebration finally had ended, researchers slowly went home. Sheim said goodbye to Maud Pie, which somehow turned in long and dramatic scene, and, for his own surprise, felt that he is actually missing this obstinate mare when she left. Zet’rar helped his dearest Oma to walk after long DJ session. This day was long and full of different events, they got tired, but, despite this, they were glad.

“Say, why Spike was so grateful to you, Karin?” second curator suddenly asked sociologist.
“Yeah, what did you do to him that he was ready to kiss you?” Oma wondered.
“Well…” Karin hesitated. It was awkward. When the concert ended, little dragon came to her and sincerely thanked: when the Sun touched the mountains, he mustered up all his courage and invited Rarity to dance floor, and thanks to Max’s gift and her lessons managed to win her favor – and even more. “I just… taught him some dances.”
“Oooh…” her friends smiled.
“Now I know why Rarity started to praise Spike’s abilities so much,” Oma said.
“Our Spike is one lucky lad now,” smiled Zet’rar.
“Indeed,” Sheim gave a nod.
“We were lucky too to have such day,” Bluve said.
“Oh yeah.”
“Wait,” Sheim suddenly stopped. “What about Edez, Max and Kor?”
“They will come. Eventually,” answered Affi.

Soon they got to their house. Their imagination drew pictures of hearty supped and good nap, but when they opened the door, they dropped their jaws: huge distiller stood on the table in the middle of the living room, the floor was littered with number of empty bottles, and Kor, Max and Edez sat around the table. Their attention, however, was focused on the last element of the apparatus: burette with sparkling clear liquid and small glass under it. Kor poured some liquid in the glass, chugged it at one gulp and immediately nosedived into the table after it. Edez, seeing this, just uttered “Weakling” and prepared portion for himself. He chugged it and then collapsed too.

“What are you doing?” exclaimed Affi, finally managing to come to her senses.
“Titratin’!” cheerfully answered Max, poured some liquid for himself and soon completed the raw of the fallen.
“I’m not going to carry them!” Karin stated.
“I’ll do it,” said Zet’rar and turned to Sheim. “Help Oma get to her room.”

Planetologist gave a nod, and senior sociologist leaned on him. Zet’rar meanwhile released his dorsal limbs and grabbed his drunk colleagues by the hind legs.

“You are going to drag them?” Bluve surprised.
“Do you think they’ll be able to feel anything?” technician responded.
“Ehm… Yeah, you are right.”

And so Zet’rar dragged Kor, Edez and Max to their rooms, Sheim began to dismantle the distiller, and Bluve, Karin and Affi – cook the long-awaited supper.





Meanwhile ponies of the Second Department were returning to their Ponyville headquarters.

“Well, ladies and gentlecolts,” Hidden Path said, “we finally started to get proofs.”
“Yeah,” Cloudbreaker gave a nod. He still was surprised. “No pony is able to overdrink eastern europoneans. No pony.”
“And those three continued to booze for three more hours…” Razor Edge spelled.
“Not only that…” the leader of the group said. “The repairpony… He sang in autotune. Ponies are not able to do this without casting the special spell – if not to use magic, only changelings can do it.”
“True,” Dim Silhouette confirmed.
“And he is not a changeling, that’s for sure… And the receptionist… For such slim pony she is incredibly strong… This is suspicious.”
“Should we inform the Center?” Grace asked.
“No. This amount of proofs is not enough. We need more materials to estimate the total scale of the invasion. We have to wait.”


* – “Holy armpits of (our) commanders-in-chief! You are (friggin’) kidding!”