On a frigid, Winter evening in northern Manetana, lurked a creature most unusual. It resembled a pony. Its coat was grey and brown, but its head was split in three. It had horns for feet, and its teeth were cotton.
And it was pissed.
“No matter what I do, I can never seem to get ponies to take me seriously!” It grumbled as it walked around the forest. “They see my head, they scream.” The creature stopped and sighed. “They see my teeth, they laugh.”
The creature looked up at the clear, night sky. “How did this happen again?”
---
“Okay, before we begin,” a tri-headed, serpentine creature said as it lay out several different types of teeth, “you must pick your-”
“I want cotton candy!” A young, tri-headed pony said.
“You moron! Now your teeth will be cotton!” The serpentine creature yelled.
---
“Yeah, I think that’s how it went.”
The creature continued to walk around until it happened upon a cottage. “Maybe the owner will let me stay the night. The last one wasn’t very nice,” it thought aloud. “The last thing I need is to deal with the royal guard.”
The creature took a deep breath and walked up the cottage door.
Knock, knock, knock
Okay, just play it cool, It thought. When they see your face, just… crap, I didn’t think this through.
Slowly, the door creaked open.
“Hello?” An earth pony asked from within a dark hallway. It gasped and stuttered as it asked, “W-What are you?”
“Uh, hey!” The creature said. “I hail from Tartarus!”
The pony’s eyes widened and it fell to the floor.
“Uh… buddy? You okay?” The creature trotted over to the body and nudged it. “Are you alright?”
The pony remained motionless.
“Crap… he’s not alright.”
“Honey, are you okay down there?” a mare called from upstairs.
“Uh-oh,” the creature said as a door upstairs opened. In a flash of dark red light, the creature teleported outside and hid in a nearby bush.
“Carpenter!” The mare inside shrieked.
Sometimes, I hate my good looks, the creature thought to itself as it snuck away from the house. Oh well, maybe somepony else will let me stay the night.
---
A short while later, the tri-headed creature arrived at a small house at the edge of a forest.
“Okay,” the creature said. “Just play it cool, don’t draw attention to your face, and be polite.”
The creature walked up to the door and knocked on it. A small bead of sweat rolled down its middle head.
The front door swung open. A unicorn mare with an orange coat and a candle for a cutie mark stood with a sour look on her face. “Residence of Daisy Blossom,” She growled. “What do you want?”
The creature jumped back slightly. “Whoa, what’s your problem?”
Daisy’s eyes shot open as she got a better look at the creature. “W-What... What…”
“Um… are you okay?” The creature asked.
“What… what in the world are you!?” Daisy asked, her her face now contorted in disgust..
“I’m a pony,” the creature said. “Now, can I stay the night?”
Daisy stood in the doorway, flabbergasted. “No! No you cannot!” She exclaimed. “Besides, I’m reading! I don’t want some… monstrosity in my house while I read!”
“Well, aren’t you just a charmer,” The creature said, “but I don’t want to freeze out here. So please, find it in your heart to let me stay.”
Daisy slammed the door and locked it.
“This. Means. War!”
With a huff, the creature reared onto its hind horns and tri-head butted the door.
Crash!
Daisy shrieked from within her living room. “Please don’t kill me!” She screamed.
The tri-headed pony looked at Daisy. “Kill? I just want a place to stay so I don’t freeze to death out here!” It trotted over to the shaking mare. “Please, can I stay?”
Daisy looked up at the freak of nature. Despite its head being split in three, its mouth moved as one, and it’s eyes glowed a faint red.
“Well?” It asked.
Daisy fainted.
“I guess that means ‘yes’.”
With a tri-smile, the creature trotted over to Daisy’s couch and hopped onto it. “Leather! My favorite!” It said as it lay on its back.
As the creature lay there, the right portion of its head glanced over at the coffee table. On it was a bowl full of chocolate. “Oooh, I haven’t had that in years,” it said as the head grabbed onto the bowl and brought it over.
As the tri-headed devouring of chocolate began, Daisy awoke and looked over. Her eyes shot open in horror. “My chocolate!” She shrieked. “I was saving that for later tonight!”
“Uh… sorry.” The creature placed the bowl back onto the table. “If you’d like-”
“Just shut up and please let me be.”
The tri-headed pony folded it’s fore-horns, an indignant look on its three faces. “I’m sorry that I didn’t want to freeze to death.”
“With how you look,” Daisy said as she lifted her head up, “you’d probably be better off dead.”
“You don’t have to be so rude,” the creature growled. “Besides, you’re no spring chicken yourself.”
Daisy stood up and stomped over to the creature. “Hey, you’re the freaky monster here!” Daisy growled as she glared at the creature. “You’re also the one who broke in!”
“Fair point.”
Daisy fell to the floor.
“Did you faint again?”
“No, I just can’t believe what’s happening,” Daisy said as she looked back up at the creature in disbelief. “Now, please tell me, what are you?” She asked. “Are you from Tartarus?”
“You called me a ‘monstrosity’ earlier,” the tri-headed pony said with a scowl. “Why should I tell you what I really am?”
“Because if you don’t, I’ll vaporize you,” Daisy said as her horn lit up.
“Whoa, getting aggresive are we?” The creature said in shock. “Calm down, I’m not going to kill you.”
“I should trust a freak like you why?” Daisy asked.
“Okay, will you please stop with the name calling?, It does hurt, even if I’m not the most appealing of creatures.”
“I don’t need to listen to you!” Daisy yelled as she fired off a magic bolt.
The creature effortlessly slouched down on the couch as the bolt struck the wall behind it. “You have some serious anger issues,” it said.
“Just tell me what in Celestia’s name you are!” Daisy screamed at the top of her lungs, her horn now glowing even brighter.
The creature covered its ears. “Okay, okay, I’ll tell you!” It screamed back. “I escaped from Tartarus after Cerberus ran off. Now, will you let me stay?” It asked with a cotton-toothy grin.
Daisy’s horn stopped glowing as she giggled violently. “W-Wait, what’s with your teeth?” She asked.
The demon folded its fore-horns. “I may have shouted something stupid when I was… born,” it said. “So I got stuck with this.”
Daisy fell to the floor in a fit of laughter. “Oh, that’s rich,” She said as she kicked the air. “Tell me, do you bleed frosting?”
“No,” the tri-headed demon growled. “I do not-” it raised its two fore-horns in the air- “bleed frosting,” it mockingly replied as it attempted to make air quotes.
“That’s a shame,” Daisy replied as she finally collected herself. “It would’ve made you all the less-”
“Just stop right there,” the demon interrupted. “I really don’t care.” It stood up and walked over to Daisy. “I do, however, have a fun idea.”
“And what would that be?” Daisy asked.
“You said you didn’t want me in your house, right?” The demon asked. “Well, I’ve got an idea: If you can catch me within a half hour, I’ll leave and never bother you again.”
“And if I don’t?” Daisy asked.
“I stay for the night.”
“No,” Daisy said. “I won’t play your stupid game.”
“Alright,” the demon said. “Then I’ll stay the night and I’ll leave-” a magic bolt flew past its right head, and struck the wall. “- tomorrow morning…” The demon angrily glared at Daisy.
“Not tomorrow.” Daisy fired off another bolt at the tri-headed pony, which missed. “Now!” She fired off another bolt, which grazed the demons left head.
“Why don’t you want me here?” The demon asked as it rubbed where the bolt grazed it. “Honestly, all I want to do is not freeze to death.”
“Because I don’t like other ponies,” Daisy growled. “I hate being around them. You aren’t even a pony, which makes it worse!”
“Well, if you want me out,” The demons front two horns glowed a dark red, “catch me!” In a flash of bright red magic, the demon vanished.
Daisy flinched at the sudden flash. “Sweet Celestia, I hate my life,’ She growled. “Might as well check the basement first.”
---
The demon appeared in the basement below. She’ll never think to look in her basement, it thought. I’m the smartest-
Creeeak
-demon ever… The demon let out a soft sigh as it heard Daisy descend into the basement.
“Ah-hah!” Daisy said as she poked her head over the banister. “I found you! Now, leave!”
“I said you had to catch me, you ninny.” The demon’s fore-horns lit up. “Not find me.” With a smirk, the demon teleported behind Daisy and ran up the basement steps.
Daisy looked behind her in time to see the basement door close shut. “Hey! You’re cheating!”
“You expected a demon to play fair?” The demon said from the other side of the door. “I’m absolutely shocked!” With a tri-smile, it locked the door. “Now, if you don’t mind, I’m going to enjoy that wonderful chocolate of yours.”
Daisy growled angrily. Her horn lit up as she charged up a powerful a powerful magic blast.
Boom!
The blast blew the basement door off its hinges. “Get back here!” Daisy screamed as she teleported up into the hallway. “Where are you?”
“Mm, this is delicious,” the demon said from in the living room. It lay on the couch with look of glee on its face. “Hey, do you have any ice cream?”
Daisy stormed into the living room and a vicious right hook to the demons center head. “There, I caught you!”
The demon looked up at the unicorn. Her eyes were full of rage and fury. “I don’t wanna leave,” it said. “I quite like it here. It’s cozy and your food’s wonderful.”
“You said you’d leave if I caught you.” Daisy growled. “Now, get lost.”
“Oh, you’re serious.” The tri-headed demon stood up and looked down at Daisy. “I’m going to be blunt here.” The demon inhaled and yelled, ”I’m not leaving. You trusted a demon, that’s your own fault!”
Daisy stumbled backwards and fell onto the floor. “Okay then.” She stood back up and shot a glare at the demon, who had gone back to laying on the couch. “What if I kill you?”
The demons left eye shot open. “Excuse me?” It asked. “You realize I’m only staying the night, right?”
Daisy nodded. “And I have no desire to share my house with anypony, She said coldly. “Especially some three headed freak from Tartarus!”
“You’re crazy,” the demon replied with a slight chuckle. “You realize that, right?”
“So I’ve been told.”
“Tell me, have you ever killed another pony for wanting to hang out?” The demon asked.
“You aren’t the first intruder I’ve had,” Daisy said as her horn lit up. “Just like them, I’ll hide your body in the attic!”
“O-kay then.” The demon stood up and stretched its necks. “Show me what you can do.”
Daisy grit her teeth as she fired off several magic bolts in rapid succession.
The demon watched as the bolts flew passed it and blasted away portions of the couch and wall. “You’re a horrible shot,” it remarked. As it turned its attention back to Daisy, a large bolt struck it head on, sending the tri-shocked demon flying through the wall.
Daisy teleported to the demons side, who now lay on a top stair leading down to the basement. “For a demon, you’re remarkably weak,” She said as she prepared to fire another blast.
“I was always more into being playful, not fighting,” the demon said as it swung a horn at Daisy’s forelegs, tripping her and causing her to roll down the stairs. “Of course, I did learn a few things from watching other demons fight each other.”
The rage-filled mare landed on the basement floor and quickly stood up. “Just leave me alone!” She screamed as her horn glowed white.
The demon’s eyes widened. “Oh crap,” it muttered as an enormous bolt of magic flew towards it.
BOOM
The demon flew out the back door and landed in the grass. “Ow,” it muttered.
Daisy teleported out from a giant hole that used to be the central portion of the house. “How are you not dead?” She asked.
“I’m a demon,” the tri-injured demon said. “I’m pretty sure only an Alicorn can kill me.”
“Oh.”
The demon stood up and tri-shook its heads. “Now, why don’t you die!” The demon reared into its hind-horns and shot off two beams of magic
Daisy teleported out of the way. Behind her, she could hear a loud explosion. I should’ve listened to mom and bought insurance. She turned her attention back to the demon, who was admiring the explosion.
Daisy head butted the demon. Her horn lit up and sent out a large beam of magic as it pierced its thick coat.
Daisy hurled the demon off of her horn and smiled as it may on the ground. “Hah, I didn’t have to be an Alicorn to kill you!” She said with a smug smile.
“... ow,” the demon groaned, facedown in the grass. “That hurt slightly more.”
Daisy’s now bloodshot eyes shot open again. “Come on!” She cried out. “Are you seriously not dead?!”
The demon stood up, it’s fore-horns glowing dark red. “Has anypony ever told you that you’re incredibly annoying?”
“Many times.”
“Good.” The demon reared up on its hind-horns and fired off two large beams of magic, which sent Daisy flying through her house. “Because you’re the most annoying pony I’ve ever met.”
The rage-filled mare crashed through her house and landed on her front lawn. She hissed as she tried to stand up. “Did I break something?” She asked weakly.
“You’ve got a bone sticking out of a hind leg,” the demon remarked as it teleported near her front door and walked over. “Also, a few other bones are popping out of your body, but I think you know that.”
Daisy felt the demon bite down on her tail. “What are you doing?” She asked weakly.
“Doing what you couldn’t do,” it snapped. “Besides, there’s no way you can survive, so call this mercy.”
Daisy looked at the demon, whose fore-horns glowed a dark red. She spit out blood and groaned in agony. “You suck.”
“You do too,” the demon replied as it teleported up to the cottage roof. “At fighting and at manners.”
“Bite me,” Daisy replied angrily.
“Will do when I end up back in Tartarus.” The demon jumped off the roof and slammed its horn-legs into Daisy’s body. Its fore-horns fired off two large beams of magic, which created two comically large holes in her body, and seared flesh from bone.
The demon looked down at Daisy’s remains. The lower portion of its body was covered in tufts of fur, blood, and chunks of flesh. “I wonder if she has a shower.
CRASH
The demon turned around.
Daisy’s house was nothing more than a pile of wood, having collapsed entirely.
The demons right eye twitched violently. It reared on its hind-horns and slammed its two fore-horns back into Daisy’s corpse. “Damn it!”