“...we have to save them.”
Spike glanced up from the comic book he was reading, raising an eyebrow. “Save who?”
“The robots! And, and the dragons, and all the other creatures that...” Twilight shuddered. “...that are enslaved in that other reality.”
The young dragon rolled his eyes. “So, let me get this straight. You want to go to back to that universe you found four weeks ago, somehow rescue a good portion of the population, and integrate them into a society comprised of individuals that look exactly identical to their former oppressors.”
“YES!”
With a sigh, Spike picked himself up and walked toward the librarian. She was in one of her moods again, the kind that tended to lead to epic mistakes and adventures. And while he had nothing against adventures, on the whole... sometimes she let her plans get in the way of her critical thinking skills. “Look, Twilight. It’s a horrible place. But just plucking them out of it won’t solve the problem.”
“...You’re right, Spike.” The unicorn hung her head. “A mass relocation wouldn’t change anything.”
“There, you see?” Number One Assistant Spike patted his lifelong companion on the shoulder. “You’ve just got to think these things through.”
“...but if we opened diplomatic relations with the other world--” Twilight ran to the bookshelves, pulling out as many titles on negotiation as she could. “--of course that would mean I’d have to find out how their government worked--oh, and factor in culture shock, can’t forget that--”
Spike sighed. Well, he had tried... “I’ll go get the girls.”
“What? Nononono, you can’t!” The librarian shut the door quickly. “This place is terrible enough WITHOUT showing them how their alternates are! I know Fluttershy would be terrified of herself, and we can’t risk them meeting.”
“So, just cast that invisibility spell.” Spike shrugged. “It’s not like anypony over there will be looking for them, and they might find out things you wouldn’t notice. And quite frankly, I’m not willing to let you go back alone.”
“But... but...” Twilight tried to come up with a good counter, before resigning herself. “Fine. I’ll prepare a few invisibility spells and run up the harmonic runes. Just make sure they understand this isn’t going to be pretty.”
Spike smiled. “You got it.”
***
The five mares stood in the middle of the chalk circle, eyeing the runes around them while Twilight flicked her horn through the air.
“Darling,” Rarity hazarded, “I may not be up to speed on my magical studies, but... why are there two concentric circles? I always assumed that only one was necessary for most spells.”
“Inner circle will transfer us there, outer circle will pull us back.” Twilight nudged a totem into place. “The fact is, both spells have to be cast at the same time for proper harmonization. Otherwise the tunnel collapses.”
“And what happens if tha tunnel collapses?” Applejack asked, looking upward instinctively. “Do we get crushed?”
“Oh no. Nononono.” Twilight smiled and waved a hoof reassuringly.
“Oh good.”
“It’s more of a stretching. Like taffy!” She tapped her hoof on the ground. “And I think you’d survive the process, although maybe you’d be half trapped in another world...”
Twilight noticed all the horrified looks she was receiving.
“...buuuuut that would only happen if I didn’t cast the spells at the same time! And, you know, I can do that.” The unicorn laughed awkwardly. “So, no danger. OH! Also, I need to make you all invisible.”
“Invisible?” Fluttershy tremored, glancing around. “I... I wouldn’t mind that, but how would we know where everypony else is?”
“I...” Twilight paused, bringing a hoof up to her chin. “I hadn’t thought about that.”
“I did.” Spike pulled out six gems, each a different type. “You girls all carry one of these. Twilight and Rarity will be able to find you even if you’re invisible, and if you need to see if anypony here is around you just say ‘Gem Sandwich.’”
“Thank you Spike!” Twilight took the gems and floated them to the mares, giving the dragon a warm grin. “I’d suggest we pair off. Rarity, you take Fluttershy, and I’ll go with AJ.”
“Whoa whoa whoa!” Rainbow clapped her hooves together. “I’m with Pinkie? Why am I with Pinkie? Uh, no offense.”
“Isn’t it obvious silly?” The pink blur bounced up and down happily. “My Pinkie sense will let me know where the other girls are!”
Twilight blinked. She hadn’t actually considered that. “...Yes! That’s why.”
“Oh, okay.” The cyan pegasus took her gem and descended to the ground. “I guess that makes sense.”
“Oh here, let me make some modifications...” Rarity walked out of the circle, opening her saddlebags and pulling out a few scraps of cloth. “Let’s see... hmmm... yes, yes, no, yes, no no no, yes, yes, no, yes...”
“Um... what are ya’ll doing?”
The ivory unicorn glanced over her shoulder at the cowpony. “I’m making necklaces out of scraps and those gems! That way we won’t ever lose them.” She telekinetically wrapped the selected patterns around the precious stones, and with six flashes they transformed into makeshift pieces of jewelry wrapped around the pony’s necks.
The fashionista eyed them critically. “...not the best, but then, we’ll be invisible. So it doesn’t really matter.”
Pinkie Pie bounced up and down with excitement as she bounded over to her. “Come on back into the circle! Let’s go, let’s go!” She pushed Rarity into the enclosure of runes.
“Alright!” Twilight stamped a hoof for attention. “This will be a three part spell. First: I make you invisible; that will last for three days or UNTIL I dispell it. Then I’m going to be casting the two harmonics spells. Stay in the circle, no matter what happens, until I say you can move. This is a reconnaissance mission, which means exploring and observing but NOT interfering. Let’s all try to be back at the spell entrance in five hours, okay?”
“Um, Twilight?” Fluttershy gathered her confidence. “What is this other world like?”
“...it looks the same, but under the surface it’s just... horrible.” The unicorn began casting. “No more questions, I need to focus...”
====
They arrived, without incident, in the Ponyville town square. Twilight nodded to herself, reaching a hoof out and managing to find Applejack’s... flank.
“Ahem.”
“Oh! Sorry, just...” Twilight blushed under her spell, retracting her hoof. “Just making sure you were there.” She glanced around, keeping her voice low. “All right, remember your pairings and try not to be heard. AJ and I will head to Sweet Apple Acres and find out how the farming profession operates, Fluttershy and Rarity should go to Carousel Boutique to learn about the war. Pinkie and Rainbow--”
“I think we should go to Sugarcube Corner,” Pinkie interrupted. “Something feels off in there.”
The unicorn blinked. “Uh... I was thinking you should, you know, find some textbooks on governmental policy.”
“No, sorry, definitely Sugarcube Corner. I feel it in my bones.” Pinkie began humming to herself, her voice fading as she apparently trotted away.
“Pinkie wait--!” Twilight sighed. “Fine. Rainbow, stay with her, and try to get some textbooks at some point.”
“You got it.” There was a whoosh of air as the invisible pegasus flew off, trailing the humming sound.
“Are ya’ll telling Rainbow to steal textbooks?” Even as quiet as the voice was, Applejack’s disapproval was felt by the invisible scholar.
“It’s not like we wouldn’t return them, you know! It’s just for research!”
“As dismayed as I am to admit it, Twilight has a point.” Rarity managed to convey resignation. “Fluttershy, if you would be so kind as to extend a wing and put it on my back, we can head off without losing each other.”
“Okay...” There was a moment of silence, and then a quiet “eep” as the pegasus felt her friend take up residence under the limb. Then the sound of hoofsteps walking away.
“Right.” Twilight steeled herself. “You ready for this AJ? You’re going to see yourself, and you might not like it.”
There was a snort and the sound of hoofsteps. “It can’t be all that bad, Twi. Ya’ll survived meeting yerself.”
“Um, actually, I avoided myself.”
Twilight seriously wished she could see her friend’s expression in the moment of silence that followed.
“...Well then.” Applejack sighed. “Looks like we’ll be having ourselves some adventure.”
***
Pinkie slipped into Sugarcube Corner, heading for the kitchen immediately. She didn’t bother glancing at the sweets on display, her mind focused only on the sense of wrongness she had felt in the area.
She could feel the twists in the timespace continuum, all centered on the cauldron that her alternate was currently monitoring. Strange strands of magic were spiralling around the room, which really made her mane frizzle. More worrisome, though, was the intense expression her alternate had. One which spoke of years of tragedy, reformed into a drive for power.
“Boil, bubble, toil and trouble...”
Her alternate raised her head suddenly. Then without warning she shoved the entire cauldron into a pantry, hiding it quickly and returning to the oven.
Moments later, Twilight Sparkle entered. A brief wind also signaled the presence of the invisible Rainbow Dash; Pinkie smacked a cabinet, getting the attention of everypony, but she was already hopping toward the pegasus with a grin.
“‘Gem Sandwich.’”
“Oh there you are...”
“What was that, Pinkie?” Twilight asked brightly, walking toward the cabinet. She opened it and peered inside, unaware of her invisible watchers.
“Well, I don’t know! Maybe the sink’s broken, or one of Fluttershy’s creatures got in.” The alternate Pinkie--Pinkie decided to call her Bubbles in her head--wandered over to the cabinet and looked inside as well. “Huh. Weird, all I see are baking supplies.”
“Do you think they’ve developed life?”
“Nnnno, they’re definitely dead. See?” Bubbles poked them. “No heartbeat, no motion.”
“Well, better safe than sorry!” With a flare of her horn, the baking goods burst into flame. Ignoring Bubbles’ sudden attempts to put the blaze out, she wandered over to the fridge. “Hey, I came to see if you could bake me a really big cake.”
“YOU JUST SET THE FLOUR ON FIRE!”
“Big deal, get some more!” Pulling out a soda, Twilight turned around to see that Bubbles had managed to contain the inferno and was even now quelling it. “See, the thing is I need to bribe Celestia into officially recognizing me as princess, and she really likes cake. Like, REALLY likes it. So I want you to make the best cake ever for me, kay?”
Bubbles glared at her. “And what do I get out of it?”
Twilight grinned. “My continued friendship, of course! Oh wow, those are some AWESOME knives you have on the wall!” She grabbed one with her magic, popping open her soda and flicking the lid into the trash. “So shiny. I bet you could cut through anything with them!”
Pinkie watched her alternate breathe in, then deflate. “All right. Okay, I’ll... make you the cake. But it’s going to take a couple of months to get all the special ingredients.”
“Aw, thanks Pinkie!” Twilight replaced the knife. “I knew I could count on you!” She hummed to herself as she left the bakery, sipping the soda without a care in the world.
Bubbles sighed, shutting the cabinet and pulling out a paper. “Let’s see, I have a hundred bits to spare, which should be enough to restock but won’t pay for repairs. I guess I could work the poledance circuit again, but I’ve put on a few pounds...”
Pinkie recoiled silently, trying not to break out in tears at how casually her other self took this setback. Didn’t she have insurance? And why did Twilight just....
“Psst.” Rainbow’s voice emerged from thin air. “Let’s follow that Twilight. Our Twilight wants us to get some textbooks, and she lives in the library, right?”
“...Yeah. Yeah, let’s get out of here.”
***
If they weren’t invisible, Rarity would have just opened the door. But she seriously doubted her alternate wouldn’t notice such an intrusion, given that she was right on the other side. She tilted an ear to listen to herself, trying to take as much information as she could from the talkative unicorn in the boutique.
“...but I don’t think Rainbow Dash is a robot, dearie.”
“Why Not? She Is So Flat She Has To Be ArtIFicIAl.”
“Wow,” Fluttershy murmured. “Sweetie Belle really does sound different.”
Boutique Rarity sighed. “Dash has astigma, dear, do you really think a robot would have problems with their vision? Now be a dear and help me organize these dragon scales.”
“OKay!” There was the sound of whirring as Sweetie Belle presumably assisted her sister in her task.
“This is ridiculous. How can we spy on ponies we can’t even see?” Rarity glowered at the door, trying to will it to slip open. “And why do I have dragon scales? Those aren’t easy to come by, unless they’re ripping them off dragons and that’s quite frankly barbaric.”
“I don’t know, Rarity.” Fluttershy’s wing rose from her back briefly in what the unicorn assumed to be a shrug. “Twilight did say this world wasn’t as nice as ours...”
There was a sigh from Boutique Rarity. “Nonono, the thicker scales go in this box, and the thinner ones in here.”
“What ABout The Ones With Skin Still AtTached?”
“Oh just tear off the skin and throw it in a bag, Fluttershy will feed it to her pets later.”
“HooRay For EfFiCient ReSource ManAgeMent!”
On the other side of the door, two invisible ponies would have had very pale faces if they were visible.
“Oh would you look at the time! I’m sorry, Sweetie Belle, I have to go appease Lord Smooze. Why don’t you go find those friends of yours you hang out with?”
“You Mean The SnooTy Snark InVadErs? The ApPle Bloom And ScootALoo UnIts Do ProVide High LeVels Of FriendShip And Fun.”
“Just don’t burn down town hall again!” Boutique Rarity opened the door, oblivious to the two invisible ponies suddenly jumping aside to let her walk down the path. “I’ll just take this bag of dragon scraps to the spa.”
“That Was OnLy One Time, And It Was The Fault Of The Wall-Eyed PegASus!” Sweetie Belle protested as she walked after her sister.
“Now now, Sweetie, we all agreed that the Wall Eyed One doesn’t exist as such a creature would be a curse upon the community.”
“VeRy Well. InItIAte LoCaTion ProToCol: TarGets ApPle Bloom And ScootALoo.”
Their voices faded into the distance.
Eventually, Rarity crawled out of the bushes. “Fluttershy? Are you still there?”
“...yes.”
“We need to go inside and find anything we can about the war.” She took a deep breath. “Are you... ready for what we might find?”
“I, I think so.”
The unicorn nodded to herself, cautiously opening the door. With some trepidation, she and the pegasus stepped in, looking around the shop in ever increasing horror. Neither of them need to inform the other of what they had noticed; flesh was as much a material in the clothing as fabric. Almost simultaneously, they rushed out the door and lost their lunch in nearby bushes.
***
“...No. That ain’t me at all.”
Twilight sighed. “I warned you that you might not like it.”
“Look, just look at what she’s doing! She’s treating all tha cowfolk like animals!”
“Yes, Applejack, I see it.”
The two of them were watching the native apple matron gathering up cattle. With a whip. Applejack noted one of the cows trying to sneak away, but winced when her alternate flat out bucked the beast back into place. “She just broke that poor girl’s ribs! Did ya see that?!”
“Yes. I warned you that these ponies aren't like us. Did you know this version of Fluttershy is trying to summon some sort of demon to destroy the world?”
“That’s it, Ah can’t stand aside and let this happen.” With a growl, she galloped down the hill, ignoring her friend’s cries for her to stop. Without even thinking about it, she body checked her alternate and punted her into the air.
“Whoa nelly!” The other Applejack stood up, coughing and looking around. “What in the hay was that, an invisible rattlesnake?”
“How bout an invisible pony, ya sad excuse fer an Apple?!” She swung with her right hoof, connecting with her alternate’s cheek. “Why tha hay are ya’ll treating these cows like that?!”
“It was a war, Ah did what Ah had to do ta keep mah family safe! Now git ya damn guilt complex!” The other Applejack shook her head, eyes whirling.
Applejack backed away, unsure where that outburst had come from, and ran into an invisible unicorn. Said invisible unicorn proceeded to feel around her face until she had a hoof over her mouth; the earth pony didn’t need to see Twilight to know she was being glared at.
“Hey sis, why are ya’ll wrassling the ground like that?” A huge red stallion walked up to the other Applejack, helping her up. “Yer supposed ta be handling tha cows, not wrestling tha mud!”
“Sorry, bro, it was another conscience induced seizure.” The mare shook her head and dusted herself off. “Ah thought Ah got over that years ago.”
“Ah, but who can fathom tha dark depths of tha soul.” The stallion shook his head sadly.
“Don’t ya’ll muddy things with yer fancy philosophikies! Ya’ll could bring tha Inquisition on us!”
“Inquisition?” Twilight murmured. “I never heard of an inquisition in this world...”
Applejack shrugged silently, watching the two apple farmers finish their round up. No use denying what they were doing. Still, it disgusted her, seeing them treated like that...
Finishing up the job, the two farmponies triple locked their prisoners in, casually strolling toward the barn. “Ya know Apple Bloom went off ta play with those friends of hers.”
“Really?” The other Applejack snorted. “Well Ah’ll be a durned rattlesnake. She at least finish her chores?”
“Eeeeyup.”
“Welp, ah won’t have ta git out tha hickory wand then. How bout ya, Mac, ya got yer work finished?”
“What work can be redeemed by tha hooves of ponies? Ever there is something ta be done, and always we toil--”
He caught his sister’s glare.
“Er, Ah mean, Eeeeyup.”
“Good. Why don’t ya’ll go back ta yer attic then, do whatevar it is Ah hear ya doing all the time. Ah’m gonna head ta town and see if there are any shenanigans needing mah intervention.” The mare flicked her head, walking off toward ponyville.
After the two had gone, Applejack pulled Twilight’s hoof off her mouth. “Ya know, Ah don’t think we learned anything from that.”
“Because you went and punched out yourself!” The invisible unicorn swiped at her, managing to connect with a shoulder. “There’s a reason we can’t get involved yet!”
“Did ya not see what she was doing to them cowfolk?!”
“I did! I want to save them too, believe me! But I don’t know HOW yet!” Twilight sighed. “Look, let’s just... go back and regroup with the girls, all right?”
“...Fine.”
The two of them left the farm, worry in their hearts....
***
“You know my entire world revolves around you two right?” Scootaloo glanced back with a smile. “When you’re not with me, I hide in a cave under the bridge and just write drafts for fanfics. I used to think I was a troll!”
“Wow, yer almost as pathetic as Spike.” Apple Bloom grinned widely. “He writes fantasy epics, which Twilight Sparkle says are obviously a inferior form o’ literature. He’s even writing this one about invisible ponies!”
“That Makes No Sense. SixTy To EighTy PerCent Of ComMunICaTion Is NonVerbAl. AtTempTing To Write A StoRy With InVisIBle PoNies Is An ErRor, But Then So Is Spike. Ha Ha Ha Ha,” Sweetie Belle laughed.
The three of them trotted down the road, plans buzzing around them like they often did. Around them, various cries of “Cake!” “Walking!” “I just wanted to be loved!” “Headbanging!” and other such statements pontificated on the activities that the ponies of Ponyville were engaged in. As for the Snooty Snark Invaders, they had a BRILLIANT idea to try for a bioengineering cutie mark. All they’d need to do is convince the mayor to let a bull mount her and then they’d have a combination mayor and cow, the perfect politician!
Right? It made sense on paper, anyway, seeing as mayors were always being called cows. Although maybe they should try the dog first.
“There’s town hall!” Scootaloo pointed at it. “Now all we have to do is convince the mayor to have sex with a member of an inherently inferior species and/or an animal!”
“Hey, maybe we could just slip her a love potion or something,” Apple Bloom suggested. “Then we’d shove her in a room with tha sperm donor!”
“Um.” Sweetie Belle pawed the ground. “No. A Love PoTion Is ABout As LikLy To ExIst As Us SudDenLy GetTing Pulled InTo AnoTher World.”
There was an abrupt wooshing sound, and all three girls felt themselves suddenly stretch throughout spacetime as they accidentally got caught up in the spell of an invisible unicorn. With a sudden SNAP they found themselves in Twilight’s library, six very shocked ponies looking down at them.
“Um, Twi?” Applejack nudged Apple Bloom, cautiously. “Where’d they all come from?”
“I’m sorry, AJ, they got caught up in the return spell. I couldn’t stop it in time...”
Sweetie Belle looked up at Rarity. “Big Sis, What Is HapPenIng?”
The pearly unicorn sat down, trying to avoid her gaze. “Well... you see, how can I put this...”
“We’re so sorry, girls! We’ll get you back to your world in no time!” Pinkie Pie smiled. “Twilight is super duper smart and Rainbow and I got her new books so she’ll get extra smarter and even be able to--”
“PINKIE!” Rainbow Dash clapped the baker’s mouth shut, but by then it was too late.
Apple Bloom’s eyes widened. “We’re in another world?”
Fluttershy nodded. “Yes... well, sorry.” She lowered herself to the ground, clearly ashamed of the whole situation.
For a moment there was silence.
Then, with complete seriousness, Scootaloo fixed her gaze on one particular pony. “Sweetie Belle, I want you to say it’s impossible for us to spontaneously become super rich. Right now.”