I never put Johny D. into my new phone’s contacts, and I forgot his number. This shouldn’t be much of a problem since I have multiple ways of contacting him online. And his phone number. The problem is that Lyra has lain herself perfectly in my lap, to prevent me from reaching my laptop without moving her. And the moment I start to move her, she starts to wake up. And I can’t bring myself to wake her up.
I am so glad that I am the only one home right now. Well, with the exception of the filly in my lap. That said, she is asleep, which while is the source of my predicament, also means that there is not a witness to it. Small mercies, small mercies.
Maybe I can wrap her up in a blanket, then move? It usually works on our dog. I think I can reach. Got it .Ok, now to gently wrap her up…. Now to slide my body to the left and gently lower her…
Ok, I’ve got my laptop and it’s starting up. I am on the floor right in front off Lyra so that she can see where I am when she wakes up. Hopefully it will be far enough to give her a comfortable buffer, but not too far, oh no.
Oh Murphy no. Do. Not. SNEEZE!
Please tell… Oh no, she’s waking up.
“Scuse you” she bleats and then returns to softly snoring.
While I am unsure of what I expected, that was not it. Yelling, confusion, even anger, but just a everyday ‘excuse you’ being her response? I have no idea of how to handle this. I can’t even provide for myself, let alone a infant. What do I do?
Wait a moment. I might have the dumbest solution possible. I need to go online and ask for help writing a fanfic. The premises being an average Joe finds a pony. It might just work. All I have to do is get online and ask for help. I wonder if this is a lot more common then I know? As far as I know, My Little Dashie is pretty much the first of the sub-genre, did the author actually come across a age reversed Rainbow Dash?
Did writing up his adventures with his little girl become a form of therapy for him? Or maybe a cry for help? Is there a whole network of people who have gone through this, or are going through this? Or did people see that My Little Dashie became popular, and tried to get some of that popularity? Human social dynamics are weird.
Hey look, my slow a- I need to cut down my swearing. Dang it. My slow computer has finally finished its boot-up. Now what am I going to do? I guess it is off to the MLP forums. Hopefully there is already a thread setup that will help me with my dillema.
No results. Well I guess searching ‘What to do if I find a pony on my doorstep’ not having results isn’t that surprising. And no results if I switch pony with unicorn. Well, that is the extent of my research, wait I haven't tried GOOGLE yet. Still nothing helpful. I just have no idea what to do.
I’m not ready for this. This isn’t some test in math, science, or even history. There is no guideline, no rubric, nothing more than a vague idea and a lot of expectations. Parenting is hard. I wasn’t even planning on dating until I was a sophomore, in college. That was only so that once I was ready to date for real, I’d know the formula. I wouldn’t actually date for real until I had a job lined up, and a price tag on a home. Not just the apartment I was planning on renting throughout collage. Then I was gonna have a serious sit down with whomever my partner was and ask about children, and our plans for that possibility. Nowhere along the way did think that a child from a different species would just show up on my doorstep.
I’m quite simply lost at what to do.
Its at moments like this where I am envious of religious people. They have everything figured out, even as the world crashes around them, they can smile because their god has a plan. They can close their eyes, and take a step in blind faith. I can’t do that. I need something physical, some motivation to keep pressing onward. Now I have a physical source to dig deep and show some grit, a mint green, snoring, adorable source.
All I am lacking is a clear course of action. Even if I get a job, I’m still in high school; and my family will notice if I skip. I also leave her unattended whenever I leave the house. I wonder if this is how my parents felt when they we getting ready for a baby, did they get everything prepared in time? Or did they rush some last minute things once I was born?
Or did they have everything perfected from my brother’s birth? Why the he- Dang it, I really swear a lot don’t I? Well to finish the thought, why am I wasting my time wondering such useless things? I need to get my head down, grit my teeth, and work my as- agian, with the swearing!
Ok, according to Johnny D’s facebook account, he would be happy to let me house sit for him. At least that is what I think that emoticon means… I hope…
Well, I’ve arranged for him to stop by in about an hour and a half to drop off his keys. Due to my considerably bad skills at negotiation, I have managed to broker munching rights to the fridge, but if I take anything from the cabinets, I have to replace it by the end of the month.
It is a temporary fix for a few of my problems. A semi remote home for a month won’t fix anything, just buy me some time.
Best case is I somehow get enough economic stability to either rent or buy a place of my own. From there my economic stability would most likely be used up trying to supply basic necessities. Food, water, during the winter, heating…
DAM IT! I’m still in that downward spiral. No matter what I distract myself with, I remember how far from my life plan I am. I was gonna go into the National Guard right outta high school, to pay my way through college while getting a computer sciences degree. From that point I would specialise in one of two things; Robotics or game development. That would be about the end of my young adult life, leaving me in a position to start thinking about the fairer gender. Of course this doesn’t cover my plan if Congress actually declared war. Or someone is dumb enough to declare war on us. If that happens before I am nearing the end of my degree, then I could very well enlist.
Yeah, there it is, my life plan, all laid out for you. Whomever you are. Seriously, ever since that cute filly called me Dadda, I’ve felt something odd in the back of my mind. I think I’ve been feeling you poking around back there. I honestly don’t know who, or even what you are. I don’t really care, because I am not in possession of anything that I’d consider resisting a force that can read my mind over. No memories of top secret military bases, no national secrets, nothin in my noggin.
That is not to say I don’t have a plethora of embarrassing memories, or thoughts for that matter. But I can handle embarassment. At least at this stage of my life. If I do ever end up as a high class or even high end job, then collecting future blackmail while I am young, and vulnerable could be a viable plan. But it is something of a lottery, that I end up being in such a position. I end up shipped off to war, get a bad injury, return home and become a bum, and all this effort; Getting Lyra, or at least a semblance of her here, and then reading my mind: goes down the drain.
Of course all of this is assuming that there actually is a entity with anything resembling malice intent reading my mind. What was it Butcher wrote about paranoia? ‘It’s not paranoia if they’re really out to get you’ or something like that? Well, if I am going to be harbouring what could be considered an alien, with the intention of caring for it, then I should set up some contingencies.
First off, if like in a bunch of movies and what not, the government tries to to blackbag me. The standard counter would be a Mutually Assured Destruction, or M.A.D. file. Unless I do something to reset a timer, the file holding blackmail, or other information back from the public. But here is where I am gonna encounter some difficulty. Just some writing and photos of Lyra could easily be faked. With the fact that I’m going against the political machine that is the White House, I’m gonna need more than reasonable doubt. I need concrete proof. Something that could be verified everywhere. Something that I could send to a bunch of independent locations to get verified. DNA would work quite well. I’d need to store some samples allover, preferably internationally. Then I would have to set up systems to send them to various groups with a basic explanation of my situation.
If I can release undeniable evidence of Lyra existence to select groups, then I might have a chance with at least getting vengeance, and care for Lyra. What surprised that I don’t think that it will get my out of my government's clutches? Assuming they stay within police, federal or otherwise, I can only be legally detained for at most three days. If the skip to the blackbaging, then I’m pretty much screwed. If the NSA picks me up and starts to use ‘enhanced interrogation techniques’ then they won’t let me go without risking too much. The moment they take away my rights to an attorney, and fair trial with a jury of my peers, I will rattle them out. Of course then the government will backpaddle and burn ties to the group ‘impersonating’ the NSA. But It won’t even get that far, as they'll drug me up, or just drop my body in the woods near my hometown. Sneak a suicide or runaway note into my room; One less loose end. That is why I hope the M.A.D. file contingency is enough of a deterrent that I never get blackbaged.