Reticence

by Fire Gazer the Alchemist


Anxiety

Five hours. Her date with Minuette was only five short hours away.

Marble felt like throwing up. She couldn’t tell if it was because of nerves, or fear, or both.

Probably both.

She paced around her room, anxiously trotting from wall to wall as she breathed heavily. Her mind raced, trying to come up with ways to calm herself down, or at the very least not have a record breaking heart beat for the rest of the day.

No matter what she tried to do to encourage herself, she simply wasn’t ready. Despite Limestone’s pep talk earlier in the week and subsequent promise to come with her, Marble still wasn’t ready to go. She was just too afraid. The Pairing Stone’s prediction that Minuette wasn’t her soulmate only piled on to an already hefty heap of stress and worry. Said pile wasn’t particularly unusual for Marble, but it was here at the worst possible time.

Maybe you should just stay home. A tiny voice in the back of her head told her.

N-No! No, don’t be stupid! Not showing up would be worse than any conceivable horror that could happen during the date. Minuette would be crushed!

...Would she really be crushed, though?

She’d probably be hurt. Or maybe just mildly inconvenienced. It’s not like you are important to her or anything. Minuette would probably be just fine if you never showed up for your date. And Lemon Hearts… well… she’d bounce back.

Marble furiously shook her head. No, you are not going to stand Minuette up. You have to go on this date. You’ll hate yourself if you don’t. She’ll hate you if you don’t.

Her pacing slowed as her decision was finalized. But just because she was now certain she was going didn’t mean her nerves were gone.

“What am I supposed to tell her?” The words leaked from her lips before she had the chance to stop them. All week she’d been trying so hard to not think about this, but it had just been delaying the inevitable, unfortunately.

Now that Marble knew Minuette and her weren’t soulmates, how was she supposed to break the news? Just show up to the date and say “Hey Minuette, guess what? We’re not meant to be together. Bye now!”

The mere idea made her shiver with disgust. She didn’t want to say that to Minuette. She didn’t even believe it herself. Or rather, she couldn’t accept it.

But acceptance or no, what was she supposed to do? Keep it a secret from her? Sure, that might work for a little while, but what would happen when the day came that she met her actual special somepony?

Marble whimpered, the thought making her stomach ache. At this point, she was dreading the date more than she was looking forward to it, which was not how she wanted to view spending time with Minuette. But it wasn’t like there was any hope of changing that. Unless the Pairing Stone was somehow wrong…

...But the Pairing Stone is never wrong. Never ever. Marble sighed, turned to her bed, and flopped down on it into a defeated heap.

She felt like crying all over again. It didn’t matter if Limestone was going to be there with her. It didn’t matter if the date went perfectly. It didn’t matter if she got to hold Minuette’s hoof, or hug her, or kiss her, or anything! No matter what, dating her would only feel… wrong now.

Marble sniffled into her pillow, feeling tears well up in her eyes.

“Don’t tell me you need another pep talk.”

She gasped, tearing her head off of her bed and looking up to see Limestone standing in the middle of the doorway.

“Seriously,” her big sister said. “I am not good with feelings. Please don’t make me try them again.”

“Haha.” Marble’s laugh was weak, but she still managed one.

“So…” Limestone rocked on her heels, words on the tip of her tongue. “Ready to go?”

Marble clenched her jaw. “U-Uh…”

Limestone took a few steps into the room and knelt down to be eye level with her little sister. “I’m cool with you taking some time, sis, but we don’t have too much of it until we need to catch a train.”

She nodded. “Yeah… I know…”

Limestone gave her a gentle pat on the shoulder. “That means you have ten seconds before I drag you to Canterlot, got it?”

Marble paled. Her ears folded down and her pupils shrunk within the time it took for Limestone to finish her consolatory pat. “W-What?”

Her sister stood back up. “Well, I’m not letting you talk me into to going on a double date only for you to chicken out at the last second. You’re coming to Canterlot again whether you like it or not.”

She swallowed, almost choking on her fear. “B-But…” Her voice trailed off, unable to find the words.

“Three… two… one.” Limestone grunted. “Okay, here we go.”

Before Marble could react, she felt Limestone lifting her up. Her body was stuck in limp-noodle mode, so it wasn’t hard for her older sister to rip her from the bed and let her flop to the ground. Marble started to rise, but Limestone already hooked her leg to Marble’s and was dragging her out of the room without any trouble.

“L-Limestone!” Marble was lucky enough to stumble to her hooves before they reached the stairs, but wasn’t exactly graceful in her descent. Limestone was moving faster with each step and Marble was just trying to keep her legs from twisting into a knot.

Touching ground on the first floor, Limestone’s laser focus set its sights on the door. They were moving again, but Marble still couldn’t bear the thought of leaving the house.

She finally wiggled her leg free of Limestone’s grip and stopped just before they could make it to the door. “Limestone, please w-wait!”

Her sister paused, hoof on the doorknob, and turned back around. “Are you serious right now?”

Marble whimpered, ears folding down. She could hear the annoyance slipping into her sister’s tone. “I’m s-sorry… I just…” Tears welled up in her eyes. “I don’t know what to do…”

Limestone’s expression softened immediately. “Whoa, Marble...”

She sniffled. “I… I can’t just lead her on if we aren’t soulmates… but how am I supposed to tell her that we shouldn’t be together?” Tears were already streaming down her face, so she wiped them away and sniffled. “I like her so much… I want her to like me… I want so badly for this to work, but now I know it never will.”

New tears took the place of the old ones and silence permeated the room, save for her sniffling.

She could’ve spent thirty seconds or thirty hours wallowing in that pit of her own sadness, Marble wasn’t sure. Time just kind of slipped away, along with her happiness and what little self-confidence she had accrued over the last week.

After some amount of time passed—probably closer to thirty seconds than thirty hours, though—Limestone sat down next to her, one hoof on her shoulder. “Marble… you could just not tell her.”

“W-What?”

To be perfectly honest, she’d been expecting another pep talk. Or words of wisdom. Or anything that would make her feel better. Maybe Limestone was just joking?

When she looked up at her sister, though, she didn’t get that intention from her at all. Limestone’s face was serious; her brows were creased and her mouth folded into a thin line.

Definitely not joking.

“Y-You can’t be serious…”

“Marble, this is your first date with Minuette, okay? She’s not looking for her soulmate, she's looking to have a fun time with a mare she likes. Why screw that up for her?” Limestone gave her a firm pat on the back before standing up. “I know it won’t feel good to keep it to yourself, but seriously, just forget about it for tonight, okay? Maybe it’ll work out.”

Marble frowned, blinking back more tears. She stayed planted on the ground for a while longer, pondering her sister’s advice. It wasn’t a bad idea… but she still didn’t think she could do it.

“You really think I shouldn’t tell her?” Her voice was such a soft whisper, that a gentle breeze could have knocked her words to pieces.

Limestone nodded. “Yeah. I think it’d be better for both of you.”

If Limestone thinks that then…

Slowly, Marble stood back up to meet her sister at eye level. She wiped away the remaining tears and gave a shaky, firm nod. “O-okay… I guess.”

Limestone smiled. “Great, then we should go.” Marble nodded again.

Limestone turned around, hoof outstretched to grab the doorknob. Right before she could touch it, however, it clicked, and the door swung open. Marble immediately shrunk back, recognizing the imposing figure of her father.

The older stallion blinked in surprise upon seeing them and after a moment’s hesitation he cleared his throat. “Greetings, daughters. Didst thou need to travel to the fields for something?”

Marble shook, that sliver of confidence she had just gotten back was now slinking off into the distance again. “U-U-U-Uh…”

“No,” Limestone said, coming to her rescue. “We have… somewhere else to go.” Marble could tell by the sweat forming on her forehead that she hadn’t planned on running into Pa at all on their way out and wasn’t looking forward to choking out the truth in front of him.

“Thou hast business to attend to in Nickerlite?” Their father guessed.

“Ehhhhh… further out.” Limestone was wincing now, and that act alone earned her a serious glare. She sighed. “We’re going to Canterlot.”

Igneous knitted his brows together. “Didst thou receive a letter from the mining company?”

Limestone’s eyes darted everywhere in an attempt to avoid contact with her father’s. “No…”

Igneous turned his attention to Marble, who was still shaking. Slowly, his brows knit as understanding dawned on him. “Is this pertaining to the mare thou wished to court, Marble?”

She swallowed what just so happened to be the world’s biggest lump in her throat before giving her answer. “I-I-I-I-I...y-yes…” A premature wince struck her, but Marble was more worried about the threat of tears returning. It wasn’t fair! She was so close to being able to go and now…

“Very well.”

Her father stepped aside, opening up the doorway to them. This gesture was unfortunately overshadowed by the sounds of Limestone and Marble’s jaws hitting the floor.

“Wait, what?” Limestone pushed her jaw back into place, only to start using it again immediately. “You’re actually okay with letting her go?”

“I’ve yet to become blind, Limestone,” Igneous said. “I can tell that Marble needs closure on the matter. If meeting with this mare once more shall provide it, then go ahead.”

Marble’s eyes widened in disbelief. Could this actually be happening? Her father was going to let her go on a date with somepony he knew wasn’t her soulmate? Granted he was assuming this was the last Marble was ever going to see of Minuette, but it was still a decision that baffled her.

“O...kay then.” Limestone looked to her sister, her father, and her sister again. “Let’s go… I guess?”

Marble’s head jittered in what could be considered a nod; she didn’t take her eyes off of her father. “T-Thank you.”

The faintest of smiles creased his lips, and then Marble was yanked out of the house by Limestone.


Stepping off the train and onto the platform at Canterlot Station was very reminiscent for Marble. Just like last time, a crowd of ponies flooded the place, the noise was deafening, and her anxiety was approaching all time highs.

But unlike last time, this time she wasn’t so eager to turn around and run home, tail between her legs. Sure, she wasn’t ecstatic about the way things were going, but it could be a lot worse.

One thing that was nagging her was what her father had said. Did he really think that this date was supposed to be closure for her?

Marble hadn’t been entertaining the thought in between imagining various doomsday scenarios for the evening and trying not to die of stress. But now, it was a little different. What if while on the date, she simply found her fondness of Minuette fade to the point of disinterest? Would she move on, just like that?

It was hard to imagine, but it was possible all the same. As she followed Limestone out of the train station, Marble couldn’t help but feel dread for that potential situation. She didn’t want to lose interest in Minuette; she really liked her. A lot.

I wouldn’t just… not care about her because of who the Pairing Stone showed me, would I?

At this point, she had no idea. All she was certain of was that this date was going to go awry, one way or another.

“Okay, where to now?”

Marble raised her head, just now noticing they were out of the train station. Turning off auto-pilot, she stopped walking and saw her sister’s expectant gaze. “Huh?”

“We’re meeting them at Minuette’s office right? ‘Cause I don’t know how to get there.”

“Oh.” Marble looked around, getting her bearings. The rippling crowds made her stomach flop, but aside from that figuring out where to go wasn’t too hard. “T-This way.”

They started down the street, Marble taking the lead for probably the first time in her life. She wished she could say that fact made her even a little confident, but the truth was that it only revved up her nerves even more.

Shaking slightly with each step, Marble led her sister down the street, worming and squirming to avoid the throng of ponies heading in the opposite direction of them. Based on the grunts and offended gasps behind her, she could tell Limestone was using a more… direct approach to get through the crowd.

Marble just kept her head down and didn’t say anything about it. She just hoped that Limestone was taking the opportunity to vent her frustrations and not build them. The less angry she was on the date, the better.

Not that it would help anything.

As Marble rounded the corner, she felt the butterflies in her stomach flap up a flurry. She felt so close to throwing up, but just kept walking with the faint hope that she wouldn’t.

The streets seemed to fly by as the two sisters moved ever closer to the impending date. Marble barely paid attention to the turns she was making, but knew they were getting close when she saw the billboard that hung above Minuette’s dentistry.

They reached the last turn and Marble had to swallow a lump in her throat. She peered around the corner, just to check and see if their dates were there. When she did, her heart skipped a beat.

Minuette was standing just outside her office, chatting with Lemon Hearts. Hugging her body was a beautiful, sleek, purple dress. It flowed with her movements, its tight hold on Minuette’s body exemplified her curves and its lavender color complimented her coat perfectly.

Time seemed stuck in slow motion as Marble stared and drank in every detail of her date. The way Minuette’s hair bounced in the wind, the way her snout scrunched up when she laughed, her sparkly eyes twinkling with vibrancy. She looked radiant. Stunning.

It was safe to say Marble hadn’t lost interest in Minuette.

A blush exploded on her face and she ducked back behind the corner. Her heart was pounding like a hammer against her ribcage. All of her nerves returned with a vengeance and she just about did throw up this time.

“Whoa, Marble are you okay?” Limestone asked as her sister heaved and doubled over.

“I can’t go out there.”

Limestone furrowed her brow. “What?”

Marble shook. “She’s… She’s beautiful. She’s wearing a d-dress and I... I didn’t k-know this date was supposed to be f-fancy. I can’t m-meet her like this. I should just g-go before I embarrass myself and h-her.”

With a roll of her eyes, Limestone grunted. “Don’t be stupid, Marble.”

“B-But— Eep!” Marble suddenly lurched forward. She looked down to see her sister’s hoof wrapped around hers, then glanced up to see that they were rounding the corner and heading straight for their dates.

Marble found it hard to breathe as her hooves dragged on the cobblestone. They were rapidly approaching the two mares. Any second now they—

“Marble!” Minuette’s bright gaze trained on her, making the shy mare’s heart melt.

She rushed up to them, and Limestone let go of Marble just in time for Minuette to throw her hooves around her and squeeze. “I’m so glad you could make it!”

Marble’s face was burning. Hesitantly, she draped her own forelegs around her, nuzzling Minuette’s mane. She was baffled; not even five seconds with this mare and already she’d forgotten all her worries. “Me too.”

She looked over to see Lemon Hearts running up to Limestone. It looked like she was about to go for a hug, like Minuette, but she slowed down when she saw Limestone’s less than ecstatic expression. Coming to a standstill, Lemon Hearts poked at the ground and blushed. “H-Hi, Limestone.”

“Hey.”

Lemon looked like her spirits were a little dampened by that non-chalant greeting, but she put on a hopeful smile regardless.

Marble took notice that the yellow mare had dressed up too. She wore a seafoam green dress that was a little less modest than her friend’s. Where Minuette had simple straps, Lemon had puffed sleeves. Minuette’s outfit was rather understated, while Lemon’s seemed rather flashy with a sash tied around her midsection that culminated with a bow on her back, and sparkles dotting the skirt.

Also, Lemon appeared to have put on makeup for the evening, where Minuette seemed to be going all natural. There was a hint of pink lipstick on her, as well as traces of eyeliner.

The difference in intentions between the two were clear. One was here to have fun, and the other was looking to catch somepony’s fancy.

“All right.” Minuette released Marble from the hug. “So are you ready for that ‘real’ first date I promised you?”

“Yes,” Marble replied without hesitation, still too captivated to remember why she’d been so scared a few moments ago.

Minuette giggled at her eagerness. “All right then, gang!” She turned, striking a pose to point down the street. “To Restaurant Row!”

Lemon Hearts smiled. “Oh boy, you two are in for a treat.”

“Yeah, a tasty treat.” Minuette giggled and Lemon soon joined in.

“...I don’t get it,” Limestone said. Marble nodded, just as lost as her big sister.

“Don’t worry, you will!” Minuette waved them forward and started walking.

Limestone started off too, likely in the mood for something to eat after their long train ride. A loud rumbling from her stomach a second later confirmed this.

Marble was about to follow them when Lemon Hearts cleared her throat. She blinked, and turned to her. “U-uh… Yes?”

Lemon gave her a soft smile. “I just wanted to say thanks, for setting this up. I… I never thought Limestone would’ve agreed to go out with me…”

Marble smiled. “You’re welcome.” She decided it was best not to tell Lemon that Limestone was only here to ease her little sister’s worries.

Lemon laughed softly to herself as they started walking. “I guess I’m just really nervous about messing this up. I mean, I know it’s just a first date and all, but at the same time it's the first date. If something were to go wrong, then it could ruin everything going forward, you know?”

Oh Celestia… Marble suddenly remembered why she'd been so nervous about this. Lemon was right; just about anything could go wrong tonight. Especially considering what the Pairing Stone had told her…

Her stomach flopped and suddenly Marble didn’t have such a good appetite anymore. She fell behind Lemon, her pace slowing to a crawl as a million billion worst-case scenarios flashed across her mind. So much could go wrong, so much could happen—

“Whoops, silly me.”

Marble blinked back to reality as she saw Minuette right next to her. “What?”

Minuette just smiled her bright, happy smile. “Sorry, I was so eager to get to our restaurant that I didn’t even think to walk with my date.” She flashed Marble a doleful pair of puppy-dog eyes. “Can you ever forgive me for being so rude?”

Marble took a moment to remember how to use words. “O-Of course.”

Minuette perked up. “Great, so let’s go Shy Pie.” She laced her front hoof around Marble’s, causing both to blush.

“O-Okay.” For the second time that night, Marble couldn’t remember why she had ever been so worried.

But even as she walked side by side with Minuette, holding hooves, and smiling, everything wasn’t perfect. No matter what, there was still a nagging voice in the back of her head, whispering to her, telling her that everything wasn’t okay.

And that it never would be.