//------------------------------// // Ch. 20; A Jedi And A Princess Walk Into A Psychologist’s Office // Story: Star Wars: A Second Chance // by Dorath //------------------------------// Hopeful Understanding quietly regarded the two individuals seated before her, a mug of hot chocolate gripped in a hoof to ward off the chill from the last scheduled winter storm that howled outside the window, ‘We’ve been making some good progress, now that Revan has completely trusted me with everything, no sudden leaps forward, unfortunately, but a slow, steady improvement.’ The retired guardpony frowned for a moment, ‘Though I’d love to give her COs a good buck in the head for what they pulled back on Comezelar. Best troops or not, propaganda and morale boosts or not, you can’t push guardponies that hard for that long without them burning out, mentally, spiritually, even if the body can keep on going. It almost sounds like they were trying to see how long it would take for the platoon to snap, and wanted to see what would happen when they finally did.’ The mare took a sip from her mug in order to cover her nervous excitement as she turned her attention to the dark alicorn who was currently finishing her second cup of coffee since she walked into Hopeful’s office, ‘Princess Luna is in my office and she wants my help with something! O Celestia, please don’t let me buck this up …’ “So, Princess, what brings you to see me?” The lunar alicorn flushed slightly as she glanced down at the cup suspended in her aura, “This modern practice of admitting weakness to others beside one’s closest friends and family is still most strange to me, but mine sister and niece both have urged me to seek ‘professional help’, and I know of the work thou have done trying to aid Revan Vao.” Luna nodded over at the Jedi, then raised her muzzle to look the pegasus in the eyes, “So, Counsellor Hopeful, I ask if thou would be willing to take me on as a patient and assist me with mine own past as well.” “Of course, your Highness, it would be an honor to help you,” Hopeful smiled gently at her diarch, and then looked over at Revan, “I gather you are here as moral support?” “Something like that,” the twi’lek agreed, “Luna, Celestia and the other girls stayed by my side when I faced some of the darkest points in my life, returning the favor for my ori’vod is the least I could do.” “Thy ‘ori’vod’,” Luna mused, “I like the sound of that, it is much better, more dignified sounding, than the other nickname that thou have given me.” Revan grinned as she reached over to give the alicorn’s shoulder a friendly shove, “You and Celestia are both my ori’vods, but you will always be ‘Spooky’ to me.” Hopeful couldn’t stop herself from grinning as the Princess of the Night shook her head in exasperation and grumbled, “I begin to understand ‘Tia’s, fair Applejack’s and gracious Rarity’s comments on the trials of being an elder sister.” The pegasus’ smile grew even broader as Revan leaned over to wrap the now blushing alicorn in a hug, “Thanks, Luna, hearing you say that means a lot to me.” ‘Princess Luna seems much more … approachable than I thought she would be,’ Hopeful observed as she shook her own head in amusement at the twi’lek’s teasing, “Did you wish to begin today, Princess, or would you rather wait until our next session?” “I have delayed for too long already, Hopeful Understanding, but I am unsure as to how we ought to proceed ….” “We talk about whatever is troubling you, Princess,” the pegasus pulled a blank file from within her desk and shifted into a more comfortable position in her chair as she readied her quill pen, “We can begin with smaller issues and work our way up to the big ones, if that makes you more comfortable, and it’s perfectly fine if you ramble some.” “Ramble,” Luna gave a prim sniff, “I will have thou know, Counsellor Hopeful, that a princess does not ramble!” the alicorn maintained her pose of offended dignity for a moment, then deflated as she leaned back in her seat, “Well, maybe we do digress from time to time.” The twi’lek and pegasus chuckled as Luna gathered her thoughts, her eyes distant with old memories, “I have not spoken of my fall with anypony except ‘Tia, even dear Cadance knows only the broad strokes of mine disgrace ….” The lunar princess fell silent for a time, then began her tale, “Looking at what Equestria is now, what ponies have achieved, it is almost inconceivable how different it was back when ‘Tia and I first vanquished Discord and sealed him away. Generations of his whims and misrule had devastated not only our lands but the neighboring nations as well, and in many places, the harmony that had be so instrumental in founding our beloved realm was reduced to little more than a memory.” “After so long under Discord’s influence, rebuilding our principality was a battle of its own, ‘Tia sought to spread peace and unity through her words and guidance, and when her counsel was refused, I brought it with my wingblades.” Luna glanced at Revan and Hopeful, “Yes, the land of harmony, understanding and friendship was partially forged by the edge of a spear, and both mine sister and I consider it one of our great disgraces that we did not find a better way.” “Even once we had unified Equestria again, relations with the other nations proved no better, Equestria had been the seat of Discord’s reign for so long that many simply could not see it as anything else. So, to protect our little ponies, we sent out the envoys, sent our Champions, and, when all else failed, the Guard marched. “It took nearly two hundred years before ‘Tia and I could direct our attentions from protecting and stabilizing Equestria to focusing on improving the lives of our little ponies. Even then I found I was ignored in favor of ‘Tia, when I was not being outright feared, but I foalishly convinced mineself that it was merely a hold-over from the wars, that their dread and uncertainties would fade as ponies came to known me as somepony other than the Marshal of the Guards, and things would improve …” “Sounds reasonable enough to me,” Revan observed as she refilled the princess’ cup, “Though plenty of folk, and ponies, are fascinated by soldiers, and you being a war hero and the head of all the guards should’ve had you beating them off with a stick, especially with you being a hottie.” “Firstly, I would never beat any of my little ponies with a stick, that would be barbaric! Secondly, I thought thou had agreed to stop flirting with me.” The twi’lek grinned at Luna as she handed back her cup, “In the first part, it’s just an expression, Luna, as for the second part, why would I ever agree to that?” Revan’s smirk dropped away as her eye narrowed, “Wait, so it really bothers you? I thought we were just teasing, why didn’t you tell me?” “Given thy history, thou having … different … ideas on relationship behavior is only to be expected,” the alicorn replied in an abashed tone, “And since I do appreciate other portions of how open thou are about displaying thy affections, it did not feel like I had any right to complain about this one.” “No,” the Jedi growled, “No-one should feel uncomfortable because of me unless I’m deliberately menacing them, especially one of my vod! I’m not a bully!” she reached out to grip Luna’s shoulder, “I’m sorry I was embarrassing you, that was never what I wanted, and I promise I will never knowingly do that to you again. Can you forgive me?” The princess’ lips quirked in a small smile, “Thou are forgiven, Revan Vao, I know that thee did not mean to upset me with thy flirtations, and were merely trying to show comradery. Let us put this in the past.” ‘They both seem to react well to shared session,’ Hopeful observed as she jotted down a few notes, ‘Possibly some regular group therapy?’ “Did you try making public appearances, Princess? Meeting ponies outside of your official duties?” “Yes, a number of times during the first few decades after ‘Tia’s and mine rule had settled. It … never went well,” Luna’s ears dropped flat as she lowered her gaze to the floor, “After those early … disappointments, I stopped trying to interact with ponies beyond mine sister, the castle staff and the Guards. I refused ‘Tia’s attempts to get me to mingle with other ponies and concentrated on mine duties and mine efforts to make the nights as beautiful as I could, hoping that mine work would win me what I apparently could not attain socially.” “Of course, it did not succeed, ‘Tia held open courts and attended galas and other functions, ponies may have treated her with more distant propriety than ‘Tia wanted, but she was there, they could all see her. But the only time that they heard about me or mine Night Guard was when we dealt with a monster attack, the only time they saw me was in their nightmares, I should have known mine actions were doomed to failure.” The Jedi opened her mouth, her face angry, but the alicorn raised a hoof to stay her words, “No, Revan Vao, I do not violate our accord, these are mine actions, mine failures, and they built one upon the other to form the foundations of mine fall.” ‘Accord? Something to look into latter, perhaps …’ “Recognizing your mistakes and learning from them is one of the keys to moving past them,” the pegasus tapped her quill against her chin in thought as she gazed at her diarch, “If you don’t mind me saying so, Princess, you seem to have a rather firm grasp on these issues.” “I have had a thousand years trapped in mine own body with nothing to do but look back at the path that brought me to such a pass, and to think on those I wronged. It is a long time for mistakes and guilt to fester, and I had mine own tear-filled confession with ‘Tia not long after mine return,” Luna gave her head an irritated toss, “Well, let us finish with mine ignoble little tale.” “Four hundred more years passed, four hundred years of loneliness, depression, and, I am ashamed to admit, an ever growing jealousy of mine sister and anger at our little ponies for their perceived rejection of me and mine night. And then Sombra happened,” the alicorn sighed and gave the other two a small, unhappy smile, “I have often pondered whether I would have fallen even without Sombra’s influence, or if I might, perhaps, have finally broken mine isolation, overcome mine envy, and joined ‘Tia among our little ponies. The fact that I have be unable to come to a definite conclusion vexes me greatly.” “What was the story with Sombra anyway?” Revan asked, “Even from what little Twi’ knew about him, I’m surprised that you and Celestia didn’t stomp his ass earlier.” “Princess Amore, Sombra’s predecessor, was a dear friend to both me and ‘Tia, and when she disappeared, we were distraught,” Luna drained her cup in a single draught, then continued, her face forlorn, “In our grief, we foalishly let the Peerage Council handle relations with the new 'King'. Yet another mistake that others suffered for, if we had dealt with him personally, perhaps we might have seen the evil growing within him before it was too late.” “When we began to receive word of Sombra’s brutality to his own subjects, we wanted to intervene, I militarily, ‘Tia diplomatically and economically, but the Council prevented us. ‘An internal matter of the Empire’ they said, ‘Not any of our affair’ they said,” Luna’s aura suddenly flared, crushing the mug she still held, “Ponies were suffering! How was that ‘Not our affair’?!” Hopeful pulled back into her seat, her eyes wide at the Princess’ outburst, while Revan placed a comforting hand on the alicorn’s shoulder, “Easy, Luna, the bastards are dead and gone, letting them rile you up is giving them more thought than they deserve.” Luna took a few deep breathes and then nodded as she carefully placed the remains of her cup on the corner of the pegasus' desk, "I apologize for mine behavior, Hopeful Understanding, and for the destruction of thy property. I will have thy cup replaced, of course.” “It’s quite alright, Princess,” Hopeful replied, waving off the alicorn’s apology, ‘Although, some anger management sessions might be a good idea …’ “But I have to ask, how exactly did the nobles prevent you and Princess Celestia from doing anything?” “When ‘Tia and I first began reunifying Equestria, we often left whatever governments we found in place to reduce resistance to our reign and speedup reconstruction. This, regrettably, gave the aristocratic families a great deal of power, and it mortifies me to admit, several of them took advantage of the chaos and confusion of our early rule to expand their authority even farther. “The Peerage Council continued to block our efforts to do something about Sombra’s actions, even as we learned of his additional atrocities, but it wasn’t until he invaded and occupied Stalliongrad that we were finally free to act. “We sent the bulk of the Guards North in order to retake the city and rescue those ponies that Sombra’s legionnaires were already sending back to the Empire, while ‘Tia and I, along with a small bodyguard force, headed straight towards the Crystal Empire to deal with Sombra himself.” Luna’s ears flattened as she flushed, “Despite the direness of the situation, I was happy. For the first time in centuries, ‘Tia and I were acting together, as equals,” the alicorn sat quietly for a time, then continued with her account, “When we reached the mountains that overlook the city, ‘Tia and I went on alone, so that Sombra would not be able to steal the minds of our guardponies, as he had done to his own legionnaires.” “When we shattered the roof of his throne hall, Sombra hid himself within his shadows and attacked our minds with twisted visions and venomous words. I do not know what he showed ‘Tia, but it was horrible enough to drop her where she stood, while he tormented me with images of our little ponies’ fear and of mine sister betraying me. When that failed to break me, he tried to drown me in his corrupted darkness.” Luna wrapped her forelegs around her barrel and shivered, “I could feel it examining me, judging me. It was not until many years later that I realized that Sombra had made a pact with the Nightmare, and it was considering me for its new host.” “I was able to resist Sombra’s attack, whether due to mine long experience fighting against the shadows, or some decision of the Nightmare’s, I do not know, but it shook him enough that his hold on ‘Tia’s mind faltered. With mine sister free, and Sombra no longer hidden, we were quick to join our power with the Elements of Harmony as we had against Discord, but instead of banishing Sombra and freeing the crystal ponies, Sombra’s final curse exiled the Crystal Empire alongside him. “After our failure in the North, I fell into a deep melancholy, but as the months passed, my depression turned into delusions and misguided fury as the Nightmare tightened its grip upon me. It took less than a year for me to fall completely and raise an army to wage war against mine own sister.” Luna turned away from her listeners as she tried to shrink into her chair, “It took two years of civil war and bringing ruin and misery down upon the heads of our little ponies before ‘Tia confronted and finally vanquished me in our old castle.” “And when I returned from my exile, if it had not been for the Bearers of Harmony, I would have carried out mine mad design and doomed all of Equus to a slow death,” the princess flushed with shame as she looked at the floor, unwilling to meet the pegasus’ or twi’lek’s gaze. Revan reached out to give the alicorn’s shoulder a comforting squeeze, “Not meaning to poke at old wounds, but how did you manage to raise an army when damn near everyone was either ignoring or terrified of you?” “Mine devoted thestrals headed mine call, even in mine madness, and the pegasus clans, save ever-faithful clan Kicker, blamed ‘Tia and the Peerage Council for the loss of the Crystal Empire, and their anger and desire for a changed government was greater than their fear of me. Others …,” Luna sighed, “Others followed me for their own reasons. Some were as misguidedly noble as the thestrals and pegasi, while others merely hoped to gain power or wealth from mine victory.” “Still, mine madness and rebellion allowed ‘Tia to restrain the aristocrats’ authority, in that much, at least, mine crimes served Equestria.” The twi’lek gave the princess’s shoulder a sharp shake as she frowned at the alicorn, “We’ve talked about placing blame where it belongs, Luna.” “Indeed we have, Revan Vao,” Luna replied, with a small, sad, smile, “And yet, for all our words and admonishments to each other, we both still fall short of the mark, do we not?” the Jedi could only nod in agreement with the lunar diarch’s words, her own lips curled in a self-mocking smile of her own. “So, Hopeful Understanding, now that thou have heard mine tale, are thee still willing to have me for thy patient?” The pegasus raised a brow at her princess, “Of course, your Highness, I’m not here to judge you or your actions, and anyway, it seems to me that you have already served your sentence for your actions.” Hopeful frowned for a moment as she considered the oddly matched pair seated across from her, “If I was a suspicious mare, I’d wonder at how similar your cases are, oh, not in the specifics of how your issues originated,” the pegasus continued with a wave of her hoof, “But both of you having problems with guilt? And both of you blaming yourselves for actions that were out of your control? The coincidences are a bit striking, is all.” “Now then, your Highness, I realize that your day runs differently than that of most ponies, but we do need to schedule your regular appointments ….” ________________________________________ Luna glanced up at the snowflakes drifting thickly down from the leaden sky as she wrapped her scarf around her neck and sighed happily at its warmth, 'What an excellent creation this is, so warm and … what is the phrase ponies are using now? Ah, yes, “snuggly",’ her scarf finally adjusted to her liking, the princess began the walk to the Palace District, her two-pony detail of Night Guards falling in beside her. “So,” Luna began, glancing at the red-cloaked twi’lek strolling alongside, “That is how psychological therapy is done?” “Pretty much, yeah,” Revan shrugged, “You do a lot of talking, and Hopeful does some talking of her own, mostly asking you questions.” “And this has benefited thou?” “Ehhh,” the Jedi stuck a hand out from beneath her cloak and waggled it back-and-forth, “Maybe? I think it’s helped, but I’m crazy, so what do I know?” Revan’s impudence left Luna rolling her eyes. As the little band entered more heavily travelled streets, their pace slowed as startled ponies stopped in their tracks to bow, calling out pleasantries to their passing diarch. A scattering of foals, either braver than their elders, or merely less bound by decorum, trotted forward to give the Princess of the Night a quick hug, before scampering back to their friends or family. “You seem to be popular with the younglings,” Revan observed as they passed through the palace gates, having paused to wave to the ponies outside and exchange embraces with a last few colts and fillies, “Keep it up and in a few generations you’ll probably be ‘Equestria’s Big Sister’ the same way that some of the papers call Celestia ‘the Mother of Equestria’.” “I think that would be most excellent,” Luna replied with a smile, “Nachtfalter, Schattenlied thou are both dismissed, and I bid thee have a good night. Come, Revan Vao, ‘Tia is waiting for us.” ________________________________________ Celestia looked up, a slice of apple held in her magic halfway to where Philomena was perched on the back of her chair, as Equestria’s only (for the moment) Jedi strode through the door alongside her little sister, both of them still brushing bits of snow from their heads. “Ah, there you are, I was beginning to wonder what was keeping you.” “We ran into some of Luna’s fans on our way back,” Revan explained, reaching out to give one of younger alicorn’s ears a playful tug, “Spooky is a hit with the younger generation, it seems,” she added as she ducked aside to avoid the lazy wing-swat that Luna threw at her. “So I have heard,” Celestia smiled, “And how did your meeting with Counsellor Hopeful go?” “Acceptable, I think,” Luna answered, as she started in on her dinner, “Leastwise, Hopeful Understanding is still willing to provide me with treatment even after hearing of mine disgrace, for which I am most grateful.” She paused in contemplation for a moment, “In truth, retelling mine shameful history to Hopeful Understanding and Revan Vao was not as painful as I had feared.” “You ponies can be damn tough, I’ll give you that,” the Jedi added from her own seat, “If I had spent a thousand years constantly going over my past and all my frell-ups, I’d be a total section-eight.” “I have had extensive time with which to face mine failings, even if moving past them still eludes me,” the younger diarch observed, “And I did break down crying in ‘Tia’s chambers when I first admitted all to her,” she added in an embarrassed tone. “You weren’t the only one in tears, as I recall, Lulu,” Celestia reminded her little sister gently, “Now come, enough of such gloomy thoughts! We have all the future before us, and it is up to us to make it as wonderful as possible!” Luna rolled her eyes at her sister's overblown pronouncement, but could not help smiling at her, “Speaking of the future, Revan Vao, you should expect to be contacted by representatives of the scientific community, and possibly the press, in the coming months.” “Huh? What would they want with me?” The two sisters exchanged an amused look, “It might, just possibly, have something to do with you being a space alien,” Celestia observed with a smirk. “You know, I’d completely forgotten that,” Revan retorted as she returned the solar diarch’s impish grin, “I meant why now? I’ve been in Equestria for over a year, why are they noticing me now?” “In truth, much of the press, and a disappointing number of scientists, have apparently been dismissing reports of thy presence as mere fanciful rumors,” Luna gave a disappointed shake of her head. “As thou will soon be taking in students for thy … second class, it will surely draw attention, especially, I think, from those who seek to correct their earlier ‘oversight’ when faced with thy new official status.” “Actually,” Celestia abashedly admitted, “Twilight has reported that she and the others have actually had a few ponies come looking for you. They sent most of them away as crackpots, and the few who seemed serious or respectable oddly all lost interest when they learned that you live in the Everfree.” The three burst into a fit of giggles. After their laughter had finally calmed down, Celestia turned to her sister, “I have been meaning to ask you, Lulu, what do you plan to do with your Tantabus?” “I am not quite sure, ‘Tia,” Luna sighed, “For all that the Tantabus is a manifestation of mine own power, it feels … wrong to re-absorb or unmake it.” She chewed on her lips for a few moments, lost in thought as she watched Philomena affectionately run her beak through Celestia’s mane, and then her muzzle split in a great, toothy, grin, “I do believe that I shall get a pet.”