Bright Idea, the golden coated unicorn stallion with silver eyes, orange and yellow striped mane and tail had just trotted into Sofa and Quill. Understandably, the store contained exactly that. Quills in jars and vases of all kinds were placed around the sofas in a marketing attempt to somehow sell both.
"Hello, welcome to Quill and Sofa. Let me know if you need help with anything." Came the voice of some poor soul behind the counter. They were more interested in reading the morning paper than assisting customers; chewing bubblegum with their hind hooves rested on the countertop.
Bright nodded in acknowledgement, before realising that they couldn't see him nod, and probably didn't care. This was his chance to find out some dastardly scheme that the store must be a part of.
He spent the next three straight hours inspecting every nook, cranny, crack, hole (in the walls, don't think dirty) and crevice he could find. Frustrated and upset, he went up to the front desk.
"Excuse me, could you help me find something?" He asked politely, the sides of his lips twitching in aggravation from putting on a false smile.
"Yeah, what do you want?" The disinterested clerk grumbled, forced to set her crossword puzzle aside to deal with the customer.
"I... I can't seem to find the switch." Bright bluffed, hoping this would be easy.
"Switch to where?"
"You know... The meeting place? I wanted to look around and make sure all 'this' wasn't a trap." He waved his hoof at 'this' being the store itself.
Clerk's eyes narrowed in suspicion. "Who sent you?"
Bright Idea couldn't believe his luck, and did his best to prevent suprise from showing on his face. "The... Sheriff... Yep."
'Oh I hope this works!' He cringed internally.
The clerk sat back down slowly, and object being levitated behind Bright Idea being set on the countertop in front of them by her magic. It was a Blackjack.
"Password?" She challenged.
'Oh for... Feather's sake.'
"Mmm... Quills and Sofas are Quaint and Silly." His front lips scrunched up to avoid revealing his nervousness.
"Aaaand?"
'Oh for the love of the First Mother!'
"We should kidnap a colt and filly?" He nervously squeaked.
Another object floated down from behind his head; a metal cylinder with a trigger and handle with some kind of fuse.
Scratching her chin with the blackjack, Clerk finally nodded before hoofing a button under her desk. With a loud click, a large sofa parted sideways from the floor leading down into a dark cellar.
"Never seen you at any of the meetings. What's your name?" Inquired Clerk.
"B-Bright Idea."
'How is this working?!'
"Well you be sure to let Big Z know you're coming down. Not too many Ponies know about CAPITOA, and I'd hate to remove anypony from our club."
'Capitoa?'
"Have you met the Writer?" Clerk abruptly asked, causing Bright's legs to lock up in fright for a moment.
"I'll take that as a yes. You're only here because he decided that you should."
After minutes of walking through dark corridors and fending off small rats, the two unicorns walked into an expansive underground chamber. The walls were dirt and soil; the ground was rock of all kinds. Banners hung from the ceiling with 'Capitoa' emblazoned across them. There were a few ponies conversing, some setting up Sofas and others were preparing for something with haste.
"So... What is this place?" Bright asked. His cover was already blown, so he might as well go all out.
"This is Capitoa. Causing All Problems In Town Or Abroad." She explained, climbing onto a box and laying down. "How else are we going to keep this town from getting wiped out, if it isn't always having something interesting happening to write about?"
"You cause problems for the sake of it?"
"Think about it, Bright. What happens to the characters after the story is over? If the Writer is kind enough to explain everypony's 'happily ever after', then thats all well and good. If they don't? Then we might as well cease to exist to the Writer or their readers."
'I thought this was supposed to be a comedy...'
'Hello? Scribbles?'
"The Writer cant hear you down here. It's a spell we've worked on called 'Writer's Block'. He or She is busy thinking of how to write the next chapter, and just can't for the life of them figure out what to say."
"So... What now?"
"Since you have a Writer on your tail, we do our job and start Causing All Problems In Town Or Abroad of course!" Clerk cheered.
Bright blinked his disbelief away before asking, "So what is my role in all of this?"
Clerk looked down from her box, having been calling out to other ponies and giving orders. "All you have to do is keep the Writer's attention. They write, readers read, and we stay Immortal for however many chapters."
"Take this, you'll need it for later." A colt underhoof said, a brightly colored potion held in his mouth and offered to Bright Idea.
Deciding to avoid any misconceptions, Bright quickly stepped over the colt who had been his legs and accepted the potion with his magic.
"What's this for?"
"It's called 'Carpal Tunnel'. If you need a break to think things out, it'll stun the writer long enough to send us a message. Only give it a sip, otherwise the story might dramatically change based on the Writer's mood." Clerk explained.
"Well then. Time to make things interesting I guess."