Rogue Chaos- The Archive: Don’t Play with Fire
A couple of days after rescuing Caldarius, things began to calm down on Bliss. In fact, not a lot of attention was paid to the particular planet by the Varelsi or the Jennerit. Giving Ghalt an opportunity to establish a second base on the frozen hellscape despite Kleese’s objections on the flight over. As for some of the other members of the group, Mellka and Shayne had been taking turns with trying to teach some things to Discord other than how to fight and to stay strong. Because of the whole “the universe is ending” shenanigans going throughout the system, public schools barely even existed anymore. In fact, the last one that any of them knew was swallowed up by the Varelsi during the darkening of Penarch, the star before Solus.
Now though, the Eldrid was helping unload a few crates off of the next delivery that Nova had brought in from the supplies that were held in the Detritus ring. All while asking Discord to please be patient while she was lending a hand. However, the youngling at the time, even after recently learning about some new tricks during battle and the mutations on his Helix ring, was a little more focused on something else as something buzzed on Mellka’s communicator and the pop up for it was not one that the draconequus was a fan of. “Uhh… Melly?” He said, calling Mellka by the nickname that he gave for her other that Crazy arm lady as he tried to tap her shoulder. “You missed something?”
For a moment, the Aelfrian turned around to look at him for a brief second, but then sighed. “Ehh, it’s probably not important Discord. I barely use that anyways unless it’s for emergencies or trying to annoy the imperium with prank calls.” She said, using the blade of her bio gauntlet to cut some of the crates loose that were held together by plastic and rope. However, Discord still insisted for her to check anyways.
“Okay, okay bud… Just give me a minute. Offloading all of this equipment can make somebody thirsty.” Mellka told him as she went to grab a glass of water that she had set on the table that they were at previously. However, what Discord said next changed everything.
“We can’t wait Melly! It’s from Rendain!” Upon hearing that, Mellka dropped her glass to the floor as she looked back at him, twitching a little.
“W-what? That’s… that’s just crazy. Please don’t tell me this is a sick joke.”
“I-it’s not a joke!!” Discord insisted. “He left a message.” Now with her senses on high alert, the Aelfrian took the device from the youngling and began to play the most recent recording that she received. However, her fears would soon come true. Because after hearing her own voice give the introduction, the voice that followed confirmed what Discord was trying to tell her.
“Hey, it’s Mellka. I’m too important to talk to you right now, so leave a message.”
“Ugh, I got her machine… Whatever. Hi, it’s Rendain. Remember the other day when you foiled my plans? Well, you have finally convinced me that the Eldrid threat could no longer be ignored… SO I’m destroying Ekkunar, all the life it harbors, and most notably, the Eldrid Codex. Do enjoy having your spirit broken little Eldrid… OH!! And tell Deande that the Lothar says “What’s up?”.”
That single message sent Mellka’s mind into overdrive as she looked at the youngling. “This is bad… really bad. Discord, I need you to call Ghalt and form a team as quickly as you can to get the hell over to Ekkunar, now!!”
“W-what about you!?” He asked.
“Don’t worry little guy. I’ll be helping you guys once you arrive. Just stay calm and do like I asked. We don’t have a lot of people here. Just the ones that helped us move the equipment from the Detritus base, but that’s all we’ll need.” She said, shortly before running off and taking a small courier ship off world before Discord could say anything. As Sweetie Bot walked in, the Draconequus turned around and asked Sweetie Bot a question.
“Sweetie, who do we have here at the moment?”
“Other than us, we have Orendi, Oscar Mike, and ISIC… Why, did something happen?” Sweetie Bot asked. The only thing the youngling said though caused Sweetie Bot to do exactly what Mellka told him a few moments ago.
“The Lothar said ‘what’s up’”
Ekkunar (An hour later… given how space travel works)
It took the Battleborn almost an hour to get scrambling after having to make the bombshell announcement on Rendain’s advances on Ekkunar. The UPR was already helping with the evacuation efforts with the civilians, but Discord and the others needed to rendezvous with Mellka since she was trying to extract the Eldrid Codex, which contained all the data and information that the Eldrid had recorded for throughout the years that the Eldrid had been around.
As the crew was readying their gear, Ghalt soon opened the communication line and spoke to the Battleborn on the ground. The team consisted of Discord and Sweetie Bot again, but also had Orendi, Oscar Mike, and ISIC. “Mellka’s right now at the grove working to try and find a way to dump all the codex data, but we need a way in order to get it safely back to Nova. Mellka, what’s your status?” Ghalt asked, only to get a surprised answer.
“Oh S**T, is that you guys!? Crap, it’s about time you showed up… And to answer your question, s**t’s on fire, so not too great, cap.” The Eldrid told the crew. “You need a courier for the data? You got to find Chronicle. He’s the grove’s librarian… and conveniently a heavily armed sentry. Find some shards, power him up and get the hell over here! Rendain’s going for our throats!!”
“Well, I better tell Rendain that I’m coming for his kneecaps.” ISIC chuckled as the group advanced onward. Right away, they were able to see the Chronicle powered down in standby mode along with several shard clusters… along with swarms of both Jennerit troops and Varelsi spawning out of the void they came through. Discord wasn’t as intimidated as before when it came to the Varelsi, but he was excited to see ISIC hop into the fray along with Orendi. “It’s a murder party… and literally everyone is invited.”
“Murder time is fun time!” Orendi screamed, casting her Shadowfire Pillar on a group of Thrall while Oscar Mike, Sweetie Bot and Discord gave the two of them cover from behind. Eventually, the Draconequus took it upon himself to fight alongside his crazy auntie and the insane AI as they cut a path through the enemies and collected shards for them to carry. After breaking all three of them in the vicinity, which took about roughly five minutes of fighting and thirty seconds for retrieval, all of them made their way back to the sentry and powered up the initiation device. Awakening the sentry from it’s sleep.
“Howdy there friends, I’m Chronicle, your guide to the mystical world of the Eldrid… Welcome to the grove of the Arcanum.” It said as it looked around a moment to get a bearing of its surroundings. “Apologies, everything seems to be engulfed in flames.”
“Chronicle, it’s Mellka!” The Eldrid spoke up over the intercom. “I need some help getting in here at the grove-!”
“Hey little lady, welcome back to the grove of the arcanum. Item number one, you have EIGHT overdue library books. You got a week before I send the guards,” The sentry replied, causing Discord to look at Sweetie Bot in confusion. “Item number two… HOLY S**T, THE GROVE’S ON FIRE!!!”
“I know,” Discord replied. “And I don't have Disco fever.”
“Chronicle, Ekkunar’s under siege and we got to get the codex off world. We need your help.” Mellka informed the sentry, just as he already started to move.
“Boy howdy, I say we do, lead the way guys,” He said, until he came across a round huge stone door that stood in his path. “Locked? This door isn’t supposed to be locked. OUTTA MY WAY DOOR!! THE GROVE’S ON FIRE!!!” He roared, firing his turrets at the lock as it was soon turned into scrap metal. “Library one, door zero. HAH! Suck it, obstructions!!” As the sentry moved on with the rest of the group, Chronicle was actually taking the whole thing very seriously and even used his skills as a tour guide during the whole process. “Alright, tour resumes… Now, on your left is a thing on fire… and on your right is ALSO a thing on fire!”
“And the soon to be corpses of our enemies!” Orendi spoke. Everyone turned to see more Thrall charging at them.
“LET’S DO THIS!!!” Oscar Mike announced, firing off a frag grenade at a thrall gunner that tried to fire at Chronicle.
“Quiet!! Quiet in the library!!!” Chronicle spoke.
“Sorry.” Discord whispered.
“So let me get this straight… instead of helping escort civilians to safety… we’re trying to protect data? I mean I’m probably not the only one who feels a bit odd about this right?” Kleese asked. “I mean, why can’t the data be transferred wirelessly?”
“There’s just too much in order to ensure a stable transmission. Here, take a look for yourself.” Ghalt said before deeply sighing and groaning a little. “THIS is the manifesto that the High Observatory sent along.” That was followed by what appeared to sound like a punch to the shoulder as Kleese flinched in pain.
“OWW!! Those were my bones, you nitwit!! I need those…… PROBABLY!!!”
“The codex is all the information that the Eldrid acquired about every species, star, and civilization that they have encountered. So yes, a LOT of data,” The captain told him, until he realized something with what Kleese said. “Hang on… you’re worried about the civilians? That’s…… very un-Kleese of you.”
“Yes, as a matter of fact, I have feelings… and it would be so kind of you… to NEVER mention them again!” Kleese snapped back. Discord, meanwhile, quickly wrote this down on a notepad he conjured, snickering to himself as he’d use this as blackmail in the near future.
“I do hope the civilians are okay though.” Deande said on the side, causing Ghalt to respond to her stray comment. “The Eldrid have been in these tough spots before… and they always know how to get out of them.”
“Not that it has done them much good,” Kleese muttered. “The Eldrid used to expand entire galaxies… but now there’s just a few of them left.”
“Okay, can we please spend less time talking about how F**ked the Eldrid are and instead, maybe focus on unf**king the Eldrid? Sound good? Good… God you guys yap a lot.” Mellka groaned to herself as the Chronicle began to approach another group of thrall coming at them.
“Enemies of lifelong learning detected!!” The Sentry proclaimed as he began to open fire on the Thrall. Discord himself sat on top of Chronicle and used Marquis’ cane to snipe the thrall gunmen in the back of the pack while ISIC himself worked on slaying the thrall… while having a little fun with the sounds of the dying thrall in the wake of his rampage.
“Last words not found… Applying template… “I DIED LIKE A B***H!!!” Last words recorded.”
“How’s he a dog?” Discord asked. Once causing Oscar Mike to laugh to himself a little and for Orendi to laugh maniacally as they pressed on, not answering the youngling’s question. When he tried asking again, Mellka told him that they would explain it to him when he was older.
“DAMN you!! This is a LI-BARRY-. I mean LIBRARY!!!” Chronicle declared as he continued to mow his way through the Thrall and Varelsi that spawned in his path. Soon though, at one point behind a protective shield, the Chronicle took a different position, prompting Discord to leap off of him and onto Sweetie Bot’s back.
“Chronicle’s in position Mell!!” Ghalt called out to the Eldrid as it took her a few seconds to reply.
“Okay, bringing the replicators online now… I just need a second!!” Mellka shouted back as everyone focused on eliminating the Thrall and Varelsi that had already swarmed this section of the grove while also deploying traps and turrets at different locations. Once Oscar Mike gave the all clear signal to Sweetie Bot and Discord, both of them went over to where Mellka was as quickly as possible. On the comline, the sounds of Reyna and Phoebe joining in on the conversation could be heard as well as both the mechanical filly and the draconequus caught up with Mellka.
“Hey hey! You made it!” She cheerfully replied while channeling Eldrid magic through her Bio Gauntlet. “Alright, I’m dumping all the data into some uh… data minion thingies. Just give me a moment and they’ll be ready-.”
“Contact!!” They heard Oscar Mike shout as the sounds of gunfire echoed across the ravine… along with Orendi’s unreasonable and insane outbursts. “KIIIIISSSSSSS MMMMMMMEEEEE!!!!!!!” Mellka ignored these cries though as she continued her work until the first set of couriers came out from their hiding spots in the trees.
“Alright, there they go! Get them safely to Chronicle!!”
“You heard her,” Sweetie Bot yelled at the others. “Protect the couriers!” When she said that, ISIC himself got on top of a ledge and then activated his Siege mode as he began to mow down wave after wave of Varelsi and Thrall that were closer to the grove where the Chronicle was while the Stinger and Thumper turrets dealt with the other enemies on the other side of the terrain.
“Cosmic hellspawn destroyed… hehe… Oh, I love my job.” Discord stayed with the data minions… or, rode on one, and protected them as they made their way to Chronicle. Unfortunately, more Thrall and Varelsi arrived and were about to attack the group, but, Discord quickly came up with an idea.
“Hit it!” He said. Despite it being in the afternoon, a spotlight was around the youngling, who now wore a sombrero, a blue matador outfit, and had maracas. The Jenert forces stopped and watched as Discord danced to spanish sounding music.
♫They call me Discord Pete. I'm the king of the chaotic beat
When I play the maracas I go chick-chicky-boom, chick-chicky boom
Yes sir, I'm Discord Pete. I'm the craze of the battle seats
When I start to dance, everything goes chick-chicky-boom, chick-chicky boom
The senoritas they sing and how they swing with this rumbero,
It's very nice, so full of spice.
And when they're dancing they bring a happy ring the maraquero,
El maraquero singin' a song, all the day long.
So if you like the beat, take a lesson from Discord Pete
And I'll teach you to chick-chicky-boom, chick-chicky-boom.♫
Orendi, whether is she was under control or that bored, appeared next to Discord.
♫He's really a modest guy, although he's not really a guy
In Havana, in Havana.♫
Discord danced with his crazy aunt.
♫Si, senorita I know that you would like to chicky-boom-chick
It's very nice, so full of spice.
I'll place my hand on your hip, and if you will just give me your hand
Then we shall try - just you and I. Aye-aye-aye!
So if you like the beat, take a lesson from Cuban Pete
And I'll teach you chick-chicky-boom, chick-chicky-boom, chick-chicky-boom!♫
Oscar Mike, ISIC, and Sweetie Bot watched in shock as Discord & Orendi had a congo line of Thrall & Verelsi behind them, followed by a huge group dance that, despite their opponents more bony appearances, were easily able to mimic their dance moves. Allowing for them to distract the enemy for a brief while… until a message from Chronicle caught Oscar Mike’s attention.
“Codex Data Secured. Ooh, a collection from poems about spiders from a Mike comma Oscar.”
“THOSE ARE PRIVATE!!!” Discord gasped in shock and there was a scratch in the music as the Thrall and Varelsi stopped dancing… Only to be dancing again… If you call being on fire dancing.
“I made this for YOOOUUUUU!!!” Orendi melodically shouted as she cast another Shadowfire Pillar that sent another group to be dancing while on fire. Back with the chronicle, another few couriers were on board now as the sentry kept everything in check.
“Codex data secured. Climb aboard, little guy! Alright, another piece of history safely ensconced inside of me!” It all sounded good for the most part, until Chronicle said one other thing. “Data secured… OOH!! Erotic novels, I hope they’re about Sentries.”
“Oh god, I can’t unsee that right now…” Reyna groaned over the mic.
“What does that mean?” Discord asked.
“WE’LL TELL YOU WHEN YOU’RE OLDER!!” Orendi screamed while on the back of a thrall like it was a piggyback ride before slamming it’s face into the dirt. The thrall being distracted by Orendi and ISIC wiping out the Varelsi on one side of the ravine allowed for Sweetie Bot and Oscar Mike to focus their fire on a warp anchor that landed extremely close to where the couriers were trying to get to safety.
“Ooh! 32,968 cookbooks from Alpia four. Yeah, this will be useful sure,” The sentry said, making some of the members think if sentries could actually know what Sarcasm was by his response. “Nice hustle little guy! Data secured. Would you look at that, pages of a diary from someone named Shayne-.”
“You dare read that and I’ll be coming after you!!” The young teen snarled over the mic for a moment, before noticing that Discord was out there. “Hey there Discord, hows it going?”
“I’m having fun with Aunt Orendi!!” Shayne for a few moments, couldn’t quite exactly contemplate what the youngster had said, but after Reyna filled her and Aurox in on what’s going on, they understood it immediately.
“Where are we at Kleese!?” Mellka shouted over the intercom, hoping to hear him respond.
“Ninety percent of the codex is in hand.” He told her. “And from the looks of things, everyone is doing their job at holding off the Jennerit and Varelsi very nicely if I do say so myself. Give it another minute or two and we should have everything we need.
“Okay, once we got everything, we need to get Chronicle back to Nova and then get the hell off of Ekkunar! Is everyone on board with this plan?” She asked. No one had any objections… except one person.
“Yeah, I’m not on board with it,” Chronicle replied nervously. “I live here… I do not want to leave my home.”
“Is everybody that I give a sh*t about on board with this plan!?!” The only answer that was heard was everybody agreeing, including the others. Once they were clear, Discord and Sweetie Bot helped guide the last remaining couriers to the sentry as he secured the data.
“Codex download complete!”
“Alright everyone, you know the drill,” Ghalt spoke up to everyone on the ground along with the other Battleborn who were doing tasks to help with the assistance of the mission. “Haul ass back to the Rendezvous point! We’re getting out of here.” Everyone soon breathed a major sigh of relief… Until they all heard something from Chronicle that no one was even prepared for.
“So, my cousin Geoff gets to be a spider and I get to be kidnapped and Jobless! Great, love that, Fantastic…” That made the whole team silent for a long amount of time… only for that silence to be broken by the Magnus that was on the ground with the crew in two… simple words.
“Oh balls……”