"Is it a good surprise?" Sunburst asked weakly.
"That remains to be seen."
"I'm dead," Sunset moaned. "I'm so so dead."
Celestia looked over the shivering mare, raising a single prim eyebrow. "You appear very much alive to me. Which, at the moment, is the crux of the problem."
The construct blinked, looking up at her. "Wait... was that a joke?"
"Sunburst," the alicorn continued, "are you aware that self-directed construct spells are generally considered dark magic?"
"Well, I mean, technically speaking those spells are reliant on infusion of essence from the soul of the caster--"
"Or another source."
Sunburst gulped. "Y-Yes. Um. I know how this looks, but---"
"A brief glance at your thaumic field shows no sign of essence deprivation," Celestia stated gravely. "So, tell me Sunburst, exactly who did you rip life force from to create this mare?"
"N-nopony, I swear!" the stallion insisted. "I didn't even expect her to be self-directed!"
"Really? So the existential outburst I witnessed was the result of pre-ordained instructions?"
"I--actually, I didn't even get a chance to instill instructions," Sunburst murmured. "She was freaking out when she thought something went wrong with the Equation--"
Celestia frowned. "So you created a free-minded construct without any thought to her future--"
"Hey!" Sunset interjected. "The Independent Construct Kinesis Equation isn't supposed to create free-minded constructs!"
"The Indep--" The alicorn turned to her. "That spell? Do you really expect me to believe that a purely theoretical spell could produce a full-blown construct of any form?"
"Theoretical? It's written in practically every Platinum-level guidebook on Constructs!"
"The ICKE has never been successfully cast--"
"What are you talking about? It's just a matter of plugging in the numbers and doing the math!"
"Sunset, why are you arguing with Princess Celestia?!" Sunburst hissed desperately.
"Because what she's saying doesn't make any sense!" Sunset waved a hoof. "I mean really, she's acting like it's impossible or something, but I'm right here! I mean, yes, I'm independent-minded--still freaking out about that, a little bit, to be honest--but that's only because miss Sunshine and Rainbows here decided to sneak into the mare's bathing house for some reason!"
"Wait, how--I mean, what makes you think that?" Celestia asked.
"Well, gosh, let me think. Maybe it's because of this?!" With a flourish, Sunset Shimmer pulled off the skirt of her dress and pointed at the red-and-yellow sun on her flank.
Celestia stared at it for a moment. Sunbust slowly sat down and began to rub his forehead with his hooves.
"...Okay. I get it now." The princess nodded. "This is all some elaborate prank. Well done, Sunburst, I was completely fooled."
"What," said Sunset.
"You had me going there for a bit," the alicorn admitted. "Acting like a self-directed construct. But incomplete essence precludes the formation of a cutie mark." She clapped, a gentle smile on her face. "I'm quite impressed at your acting--"
"Okay, you know what? No. I'm not going to be dismissed like that."
Celestia blinked. "I'm sorry?"
"What part of this are you not getting?" Sunset demanded. "Sunburst found the ICKE, modified the matrix to integrate a mare's magic, snuck into the communal bathhouse to get some mane strands, and for some reason what he got was your mane. And boom, I'm here. Stop pretending this is impossible!"
"I'm perfectly fine with pretending this is impossible," Sunburst murmured.
"Well I'm not! Even if the ICKE has never been successfully cast before--which I don't believe for a second--all that means is that you accomplished something extraordinary and deserve some recognition!"
Celestia frowned. "The operative matrix always outgrows the developmental format, the amniomorphic constant clearly states--"
"Wait, seriously? People have been casting this with the amniomorphic constant?! Of course that wouldn't work!" Sunset Shimmer lit up her horn, projecting a series of numbers. "The operative matrix is designed to grow exponentially, the developmental format only grows linearly! You have to use Meadowbrook's enchantment operation, that's obvious."
"Meadowbrook's..." Celestia stared at the equation. "But Meadowbrook only used it on enchanted artifacts, not constructs!"
"Well, sure, but it's not like nopony ever mixed magical classes." Sunset flashed the numbers out of existence. "Are you seriously going to tell me that nopony ever thought to apply the operation to the ICKE?"
Celestia opened her mouth. Then she paused. "Well... I suppose that there was that one hedge-witch seven hundred or so years ago, if her ramblings about a 'mirror pool' were correct--but that still wouldn't explain you being self-directed."
"Yeah, that's your fault." Sunset rubbed her chest. "With the residue of an ordinary mare's magic the matrix would only have room for limited operations. But if the hairs Sunburst stole actually belonged to a centuries-old alicorn, the raw thaumatic power would allow expansion of the format to a point where--where my operative matrix is actually still growing!" she gasped. "That's why I had that existential crisis! The operative matrix has extended past the pre-planned protocols to an unprecedented degree!"
Sunburst flinched. "Oh. That's... good to know, I guess?"
"You've been awfully quiet during this," Celestia observed.
"Mostly I'm just trying not to escalate the situation," the stallion replied. "Also, I'm a little bit completely terrified."
"You're terrified?" Sunset rolled her eyes. "Celestia spent most of this conversation thinking I was made with dark magic! I thought she'd vaporize me!"
"Actually, I'd probably keep you hidden away and watched for a few weeks to ensure you weren't going to become pure evil, whilst also giving you remedial education so you could become your own pony." Celestia coughed. "Also, I don't vaporize ponies."
"Oh, what, do you turn them to stone instead?"
"....not ponies," Celestia hedged.
"Why are you still arguing with Celestia?" Sunburst whined.
"I don't know! I'm scared and insulted and weirded out that she apparently snuck into the mare's bath-house--I mean, if you're gay or something," she added, turning to Celestia, "I don't think that would be wrong, but it's still kind of creepy--you're ancient, and they're not... ancient--"
"I put on a disguise so I can socialize without being a 'princess,'" Celestia explained deadpan.
"What? But--you have a wealth of knowledge and power and, and wealth!"
"I'm also surrounded by self-absorbed idiots and nopony respects me for myself."
Sunset Shimmer considered that. Then she turned to Sunburst. "Congrats, you're a princess."
"Ooooooookay. I'm just..." Sunburst sighed. "Can... can we all agree that no dark magic was involved in this, and I'm not going to be thrown in a cell?"
"I'm going to put you in an informal house arrest while I examine your notes," Celestia replied. "And no matter what I find, you're going to be responsible for... I'm terribly sorry, I never got your name."
"Sunset Shimmer."
"For Sunset Shimmer's cost of living."
"I... guess that's fair."
"And what about me?" Sunset demanded. "What are you going to do with me?"
"At the moment... I don't know. I need to think on this. But..." Celestia tilted her head. "If you really are the product of the ICKE, you would have at least a portion of Sunburst's memories, yes?"
"More then a portion."
"Then it might be possible for you to join him as one of my students." The alicorn took a breath and let it out. "For now, I think we should all return to the gala. As far as anybody else is concerned, I took you two aside to ask Sunset what her intentions were toward Sunburst."
Sunburst blinked. "I... I'm not sure that I--"
"Works for me," Sunset said.
"But-but-but it's--I mean, you--she, I just--"
"Can you think of any better cover story?"
Sunburst rose a hoof... and sighed. "No."
Celestia nodded. "Well, that's settled then. If you'll excuse me, I have to go out and deal with the nobles again..."
She walked out to the ballroom, leaving the two ponies sitting together.
"...So."
"Yep."
"...Still, I mean. She wants me to be her student."
"Weren't you... we... already her student?"
"Kind of? I mean, you were, and I was you, and.... this is confusing."
"Yeah."
Sunset stared at her hooves for a moment.
"...Actually. What if... what if I became the best student?"
Sunburst looked at her. "What?"
"I mean, what if... I proved I was the best. Even though I'm a construct. Somehow."
"I... well... I mean..." Sunburst adjusted his glasses. "I mean, that wouldn't be bad, I guess. I mean, it wouldn't be what I expected--"
"I think... I might. I might do that."
"Oh. Okay."
They sat, staring at the door to the ballroom.
"...This is supposed to be a date, right?" Sunset asked suddenly.
"Uh--kind of. You know. It's supposed to look like a date."
"Yeah." The mare coughed. "So..."
"What?"
"I mean... if I hadn't been free-minded... would we... you know...?"
"Would we what?"
"...would we have kissed and stuff?"
"I..." Sunburst blushed. "I, uh... I mean... maybe?"
"Huh." Sunset flushed. "...we should."
"What?"
"We should kiss. For science. At least once." She coughed. "Since I'm a female version of you."
"O-Oh." Sunburst nodded. "Yes, I... I can see that... yes."
After a moment, they managed to look at each other.
Nervously, they leaned in.
Their lips locked. For about four seconds.
They leaned back.
"...Okay." Sunset nodded. "That was weird as Tartarus."
"Agreed," Sunburst replied. "Let's never do it again."