//------------------------------// // Party and Weird times // Story: The Guardian // by NYChris824 //------------------------------// I sat with the girls still talking, with a plate loaded with baked goods of all sorts: Cookies, cupcakes, normal cake and a muffin. We were talking about random things when someone tapped my shoulder. I turned around and saw the woman with the group of kids behind us. "Yes m'am?" I asked "Hi, I'm Ms. Cheerlie the local school teacher, and we just wanted to say thank for saving us from that manticore." She said, gesturing to her and the class behind her. "It was no problem, that's kinda my job I guess," I said "the Guardian" I said in the mysterious voice "Where did that nickname come from? How come I wasn't, I don't know, 'Creepy guy in the forest' or something?" I asked, and it would be my luck to have to kind of name. "I did, sir." A voice in the back said, he came forward. I recognized him as one of the two I saved on my first night here. He was a Pegasus with light grey fur and grey and dark grey hair. "Some of my friends asked about what happened and I said that my guardian pony was watching over me and my brother." He explained. I simply nodded and we all went back to doing our separate things. I got up to go around and meet some other ponies at the party, I noticed Big Mac and some other guys around a foldable table in the corner. They were huddled around what looked like a map, I figured it was a good start. "Hey Big Mac." I said and they all jumped, Big Mac put a hand over his massive chest. "Whew, Dan. Ya tryin' to give us a heart attack, bad enough heat season comin' up." He said, trying to get his breath. "Dan this is Thunderlane." He said to pointing to a all black pegasus with two-tone light blue hair. I remembered him from the first in the forest as well. "This is Caramel." He said, a earth pony with orangish fur and brown hair, a rare normal looking pony. "And this is Doc Whooves." He said, finishing with a light brown fur with brown hair pony another rare one. "Actually, it's just The Doctor if you don't mind." He said, in a slight British accent. "The fuck is heat season?" I asked him "You don't know what that is?" The Doc asked me "I mean, unless you're talking about summer, than I don't." "Heat season is when a mare's sexual urges go into overdrive. As such, they stalk the streets looking for a stallion to help them. As such, it isn't common for him to passed around and then die from a broken pelvis. But it's also the only time a mare can get pregnant." Thunderlane explained "Holy shit, so they basically get fucked to death." I dropped my voice a little "so it this map hiding spots, I assume?" "Eeyup, we have safehouses around the town, but the mares are catching on. So the four of us are going to go to The Castle of the Two Sisters, in the Everfree. Only issue is the Everfree is dangerous and it's a ten hour hike there." Big Mac said "Damn, how far in is it?" "'Bout thirty miles, why?" "My tank can go about thirty miles per hour or so, not to mention, it's a massive war machine. Take me with you and we'll be set." I said "Of course." The Doctor said, Big Mac put away the map and pulled out a pack of poker chips and cards, we all grab a chair and begin to play. I was doing fairly good for having played poker a few times. Kind of hard to get a game of poker going when you would be attacked every now and again back in Afghanistan. "Look boys, it's Angel Beats." Thunderlane said, I looked around for whoever he was talking about. During my scan through the room, I realized that most women had at least a C-cup size, but one unicorn was easily pushing E-cup. She has light blue fur and beige hair, she had on a tank top and short shorts. I recognized that trick immediately. "It's that the one with the big tits?" I asked "Eeyup." "Other than the obvious. What's so special about her?" "She uses her looks for favors and most stallions turn in their V-cars to her. Here she come fellas." Caramel said. Angel walked over to us, swinging her hips widely and putting an extra bounce in her step. I mentally laughed at her attempts. She grabbed a chair from an empty table and sat down next to me. "I haven't seen you before. You new?" She whispered into my ear, her hot breath covering my neck. "You could say that." I said in a monotone voice, praying that she would leave. "If you don't mind me asking dear; What happened to your muzzle and fur?" She asked, pressing her breasts into my arm "First off, I'm not a pony, so I don't have a muzzle or fur. Second I saw all your cheap tricks the instant I saw you." I said to her, before returning my attention to the game. She let an an annoyed 'humph' and left. The guys just stared at me, jaws open. "What?" I asked. "Nopony has ever turned down Angel before." Thunderlane said I shrugged "I'm not a pony and humans are the only sentient beings, so I'm still adjusting to all of this." "Would ya ever date somepony?" Big Mac asked "Maybe, but it wouldn't be right away, it may be months or years from now." I said The party ended an hour ago, the kids left three hours ago, so the party took a more adopt theme. Hard cider and beer came out, couples or more began to disappear, off to do the obvious. Part of me was still disturbed by the whole 'have sex with anyone' thing going on here, which raised the question of STDs. Big Mac said mares could only get pregnant during heat season, which seemed nice, except for the whole they became sex zombies in the process. The party was cleaned extremely quickly, thanks to Pinkie. She turned into a pink blur and cleaned it all in the blink of an eye. I was about to ask how she did that so fucking fast, but Rarity explained it all simply: Never question the antics of Pinkie Pie. No matter what happens. We were getting ready to sleep, the girls all had sleeping bags, and me? I had hot-motherfucking-pink, I took with as dignity as a man can which is zero. "When ya lived in the Everfree, where'd ya sleep Dan?" Applejack asked. "I slept on the driver seat, wasn't too bad, I've slept upright plenty of times." I said "That can't be good for your back, *gasp* I know! Next time I go to the spa, you can come with me." Rarity said "Maybe, definitely not a spa type of guy." I said, but a massage wouldn't hurt. "Splendid darling!" Rarity exclaimed, Dash just rolled her eyes. AJ and Dash definitely didn't seem like spa girl... mares, whatever. With that, we turned off the lights and went to bed. AN: I'm not sure if this warrants a Sex tag, but it's only this one scene. Just talk, nothing major. I woke up, I should say my mind woke up. That's the weird part of me, my mind wakes up first and for a couple of minutes I'm 'paralyzed' so I usually sit there and think of what my plans are for the day. 'I should go job hunting so I can get a phone. I need a place to live too. Where am I going to live until then? Maybe one of the girls would let me stay with them.' I thought to myself, I noticed someone talking in the background with someone else. "I know AJ, but still when was the last time we were with a STALLION?" Dash said "Ah know Dash but still ya saw how uncomfortable he was with sex here not to mention you heard about his world. What if he has a special somepony?" AJ countered "AJ is right Dash, besides we don't know anything about his species' mating habits. What if the females on his planet have penises instead of the males?" Twilight said. I was personally offended by that statement, but I kept silent, curious where this conversation was heading. "No offense Twi, but that's ridiculous." AJ said "OK... But what if on his planet, women are treated like property, like the caribou?" Twilight offered "That's ridiculous, don't you think he wouldn't tried something by now." Dash said "You know girls, we don't need a stallion to have fuuuun." Pinkie said, her intent obvious. "That sounds nice, if you don't mind." Fluttershy said "I agree darling, this sounds marvelous, we haven't had this type of bonding in a while." Rarity added "Ah'm surprised we haven't woken up Dan. Poor fella could sleep through a twister." AJ pointed out, I started to feel a little warm due to slight panic. Did she know I was awake? No there's no way, I haven't moved yet. "Well what are we waiting for? Let's go!" Dash said "Keep it down Dash, ya lucky Dan didn't wake up!" AJ said harshly "Come on girls, there's somewhere mooore... private." Twiligh said and I heard several pairs of feet get up. I was sitting there, in my hot pink sitting bag, stuck listening to loud moans and pleasure for the last hour. I'm not sure where major cities are, but the farthest one can hear them. I sat there trying to figure out how I'll still be 'asleep' to them. Part of me what's to say I've been up the whole time, but that would be things too awkward. Maybe I can pretend to be elsewhere and come in like nothing happened. Yea, that's a good one, but what? My bladder gives me just the way to do it, I get up and go to the bathroom at the other side of the room. I blind myself by turning on the lights. I do my business and wait to hear them coming back down. It's only a few minutes until I hear them coming back down. "Mmmm, that was marvelous dears." I hear Rarity say "Ah'll say." Applejack said "Too bad we didn't have some male company. Huh? Huh?" Dash added "Rainbow Dash." Fluttershy said in angry tone "You know better than that! What if we woke him and he said 'No'. That would've made things very uncomfortable for him." "You're right Fluttershy." Dash said quietly "Where is the big man?" "Oh my, you don't think we scared him off do you?" Fluttershy asked "Maybe, we were kinda loud up there." Twilight said "Maybe he just went to the bathroom? You know when you wake up in the middle on the morning and you have to pee really badly, but you don't wanna get up because you're nice and warm under the blankets. So you're sitting there mentally arguing about getting up to go pee." Pinkie said, I know Rarity said I shouldn't question Pinkie's antics and her way of knowing things that no one else does. But I REALLY want to. "Maybe you're right. Let's pretend to go back to sleep and see what happens." Twilight suggested. I heard several bags rustle as their owners climbed in. I waited a good five minutes before I came out. Part of me felt that they knew I was awake while they were away and hence why I wasn't out there when they returned. Pinkie's dead on theory doesn't help either. I silently climb back in and fall asleep.