//------------------------------// // Lunch with parents // Story: Chaos: the Age of Spike // by Kaliann25 //------------------------------// Lunch with the parents “Ey pal, I was thinking in something” said Rumble to Spike. “Imagine this: we turn the princesses in cute little pets for a day and sit to see everypony going crazy looking for them. What do you think? Very chaotic, right?” Spike frowned impatiently, it was a good indeed a great idea; if they could get rid of Fluttershy with something… but, no, right now he had something else to think about. “Rumble, that’s one of the best ideas I ever heard but right now I’m a little busy thinking in something else. Today is the day when Sweetie’s parents come! And they want to meet me tomorrow! What if they don’t like me? What if they tell me that I can’t date Sweetie anymore?” “What if you chill out?” Grumped Scootaloo jumping from the tree she was napping. “Dude, how old are you? Eleven and twelve! Don’t take it that serious!” Spike gulped and walked away more worried than before. Scootaloo was right, he was only eleven years old! What if they thought he was too young for Sweetie Belle? No, they maybe won’t take him seriously. This couldn’t happen to him, why? Why? Rumble looked at him with a sweat-drop in his temple. “Is just me or you just made things worse, Scoots?” “Don’t look at me, you know I’m useless with this sappy stuff” shrugged the orange filly. By his way, Spike was wandering all over Ponyville; when he noticed a strange scene: all kinds of inanimate objects doing crazy stuff and chaos all over the place. Or, well, to be more clear; he was used to that stuff but he was the one who usually did it. The one creating that disaster was none other than Discord, who was having tea with certain yellow Pegasus. “Oh isn’t that Spike? Is so nice to see you little fellow, what brings you here? Another epic prank perhaps? In that case I’ll finish my tea faster, I don’t want to interrupt you… Lord of Disharmony and Chaos” “No Discord, Spike makes prank all the time, but this is the first time you came to visit since your retirement!” Protested Fluttershy. “I’m sure Spike won’t mind to delay his prank for a day, right Spike?” Spike shrugged. “Don’t worry Fluttershy, I’m not think to do anything right now, even if Mist’s idea was great I’m not in the mood. I’m too busy thinking that tomorrow I’ll meet Sweetie’s parents but… why I’m telling you this anyway? I better go home, nice to see you Discord” He was about to leave but Fluttershy gently placed a hoof on his shoulder. “You’re cute Spike, just don’t think too much about it, just be yourself and I’m sure they’ll love you. You’re fun, creative and have a great job. Everithing will be okay, right Discord?” But the draconequus was laughing in the floor. “Ahahahahahahahahahahaha!! This is great! Are you really worried about it? You’re only a kid, who cares if you make a good impression or not? Hahahahahha, this is great, very funny!!” “Discord try to be more empathic!” Scolded Fluttershy. Discord kept laughing but calmed down a little. “Look kid, I don’t know why you are that worried, but if I’m sure of something is that you can handle all kind of challenges. I know it since I chose you as my replacement” “What it has to do with anything?” Complained Spike. “A lot” explained Discord. “At first I considered you a child with no other role than a small help from time to time, kind of sad if you ask me. But then you mixed past and future and I saw you in your full potential: with my powers and a plan that gave the Bearers of Harmony a great challenge. Then I realized that you’re the kind of person who can do whatever you want whenever you need to” Spike blinked a little surprised. “Ey, didn’t I erased your memories?” “Not mine kid, remember I am as strong as you, or I was. But why do you think I named you my replacement? I already knew what was going to happen. Anyway, back to the point, you can do everything Spike, just believe in yourself” Surprised, Spike nodded. “Oh, so that’s how paradoxes works! Weird, but apparently Mr. Swirl was right. Anyway, I better prepare for tomorrow, thank you very much Discord!” The draconequs winked an eye to Spike while he ran back home. But in the meantime in Carousel Boutique the Belle sisters were having their own problems with Rarity preparing everything for her parents’ arrival placing flowers, new curtains and such. Everything had to be perfect. “Oh yes, just another little touch of purple right here, another touch of white… and…” She noticed the green steam coming from the kitchen. If she weren’t white she would paled. “Oh hay no… SWEETIE BELLE! WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING IN THE KITCHEN??!!” The little filly appeared holding with her magic something completely carbonized. “Oh, I was just making something when they arrive!” Explained Sweetie. “Nothing bad, and last day when I gave it to Spike he loved it!” “Ehem, Sweetie dear, Spike is a dragon and can digest everything…” “Hey, that wasn’t very nice!” She said taking note for their next match. “And he loves my cooking, just as mom and dad” Rarity sighed defeated. “Okay, okay, I get it! But at least clean the kitchen please!” Sweetie nodded and took her form of Black to clean everything magically. “Done! A simple cleaning spell” Rarity smiled. “Oh yeah, I forgot about your magic increase when you transform. Anyway, mom and dad will arrive here in any time so please could you go back to normal?” And precisely when Sweetie transformed back, the doorbell rand and Mr. Hondo Flanks and Ms. Cookie Crumbles arrived to the Boutique to hug their daughters. “Rarity! Sweetie Belle!!” Shrieked Cookie while she embraced her daughters. “I’ve missed you so much girls! You must tell me everything, how’s Ponyville? What’s new?” “Mom, dad, we’re so pleased to see you” said Rarity. “How was your trip around Equestria? Something interesting?” Hondo Flanks was busy looking in the cases for the gifts they brought for their girls. “Here it is!” Said Hondo founding the gifts. “Oh girls, is so nice to see you! You’ve grown so much in this last months!” “Thank you mommy and daddy” smiled Sweetie offering them her carbonized snacks. “I made this for you” They both tried it. “Oh Sweetie, your cooking improved” congratulated Cooke. “Yes, have you practiced?” Asked Hondo. “Yup! Spike offered to try them until I perfected the recipe!” Said Sweetie proudly. “He loves my cooking!” “Oh, that’s right you have a coltfriend now” teased Hondo playing with his younger daughter’s mane. “A coltfriend we’ll meet tomorrow right? Because I need to know if he’s good enough for my daughter” “Yeah, we’re dying to meet him” said Cookie. “”We even bought him a present from Buenos Aires in Dragentina, a region of the Dragon Kingdom” “Also we’ve planned a great family trip, we’re going to Canterlot!” Announced Hondo. “Canterlot? Why this sudden family trip?” Asked Rarity a little confused. Cookie Crumbles giggled. “You see dear, I’ve heard rumors of the greatest book fair ever celebrated in there. All other book fairs we’ve being are always the same: book expositions, authors discussing between them or with their fans, book selling; and it’s good, but have you ever heard of a book fair that’s literally a fair?” “We must thank our beloved lord of Disharmony and Chaos for the idea!” Said Hondo. Sweetie’s eyes widened. “Lord of Disharmony and Chaos? You like him?” She asked delighted. “Why wouldn’t we?” Asked Cookie. “He makes our lives interesting, do you know how we ended up visiting Reptilia? It was thanks to his Crazy Doors! King Flames is so nice!” “And speaking of Reptilia, check our gifts” The sisters exchanged a look and opened the boxes their parents gave them, it was a couple of black leather jackets. Sweetie happily tried her jacket but Rarity had her doubts. “I’ve never see this kind of material here, what is it?” “We don’t know, but for some reason they have lots of it in Reptilia. I wonder what it is” mumbled Hondo. Moving to Twilight’s Palace Spike was walking in circles so nervous that creating a small crack on the floor. Twilight entered shyly. “Spike? What’s wrong with you? Are you okay?” “Eh? Oh, yes, is just that…” Twilight giggled. “The last advice I can give you is be yourself. Rarity told me so much about her parents and they seem nice, with great sense of humor who love to have fun traveling all over Equestria. Don’t worry, you’re also the Lord of Disharmony and Chaos, and there’s no better party for their daughter than a god” Spike sighed calmly, that was what he needed. “Thank you Twi, I’m much better now” “Whenever you need me Spike” smiled Twilight. “Now go to sleep, you have a great day tomorrow” Spike nodded. “Okay, and you know what? If I’m with Sweetie I’m sure I’ll have fun” “That’s the spirit Spike!” “Oh, and Twilight… do you think I should bring a gift for Sweetie’s parents?” “If you want Spike, but remember: be yourself” Now really relaxed, Spike took his time to sleep pacefully, but at the next day he woke up with a shriek: “OH NO, IT’S LATE! IT’S LATE! WHY ANYPONY WOKE ME?” Resounded his voice all over the Palace while he ran downstairs. Twilight drank a sip of her coffee. “I would do it but there’s no way I dare to enter to your room again. Just relax Spike, there’s only nine thirty o’ clock. You have time” Spike sat a little relieved but he practically swallowed his jewel-cereal since he had to meet with Sweetie at ten. “Okay, but Twi, what do you think I must buy to her parents?” Twilight considered for a minute. “Why don’t you take some flowers to Miss Belle and to Mr. Belle a pin for his hat? According to Rarity he likes that kind of stuff” Spike nodded thankful and went flying with his floating throne to the train station right after he purchased the gifts in different stores in Ponyville. He could easily made them appear but he had to show he was serious about Sweetie Belle. And in the Carousel Boutique the whole family was about to go to the train station as well but they were waiting for their older daughter. “Hurry up Rarity! We’re just waiting for you!” Protested Sweetie. “Your sister is right!” Protested Hondo. “Come on already!” “You don’t understand!” Protested Rarity from her room. “Not going with the right outfit is not proper for a lady, you must understand that I haven’t found it yet” Luckily Cookie Crumbles knew her daughter perfectly and already had a solution: “Rarity, being late to an appointment isn’t lady-like as well” Rarity gulped and went out her room wearing a beautiful scar of green silk and a light green coat to combine with her purple mane. The family preferred not to comment anything and moved to the station. “What time is it, darling?” Asked Cookie to her husband once they arrived. “Ten minutes to ten” announced the stallion. It was when Hondo and Cookie noticed the black and purple dragon sitting on a bench. “Hondo! Look, isn’t that the Lord of Disharmony and Chaos?” Cheered Cookie happily. “Oh what a coincidence dear, any if his official residence is Ponyville I never thought we were going to meet him. Do you think he would give us an autograph?” “Let’s ask him!” They both approached to Spike. “Excuse us my good sir, we’re huge fans of your work and we were wondering…” began Hondo Flanks. “Would you give us an autograph?” Finished Cookie Crumbles. Spike nodded happily. “What? Oh, of course! It’s my pleasure mister and miss…” “Oh, Crumbles, Cookie Crumbles” “Hondo Flanks” said the stallion. “Oh, and do you mind if we take a family picture with you? Ey, Sweetie, Rarity come here! A picture with the god of chaos, this would be a family treasure!” Sweetie couldn’t hold her laughter just like Rarity. “What’s so funny?” Asked Cookie. “Girls, you may live in Ponyville but what chance your father and I have to meet an actual god? Now come on and take the picture!” “You don’t understand” said Sweetie approaching and hugging Spike. “Mom, dad, this is my coltfriend; no, my drakfriend: Spike god of chaos” Spike bowed to mister and miss belle offering them the presents. “Is a pleasure to meet you, mister Hondo; miss Cookie. I’m glad to finally meet you, Sweetie Belle told me so much about you, is good to know you’re both fans of my work” Sweetie’s parents looked each other not believing this. For real? But quickly enough Hondo recovered from the surprise and faced Spike: “So why do you think you’re good enough to date our daughter?” Defied Hondo. Spike gulped paling. Then Cookie took a pair of glasses in red frame like Rarity’s and began the interrogatory: “Alright, what are your intention with our daughter? We want to know” “I…” “What have you planned for your future together?” Asked Hondo. “When are you planning to marry her? And when can we expect some grandchildren?” Cookie kicked him in the hoof. “Hondo, that’s for Rarity’s coltfriend. Forget about last part, just when’s the wedding?” “More important” said Hondo. “How old are you? Are you planning to corrupt our sweet little daughter?” Sweetie Belle was about to intervene but her mother stopped her. “No Sweetie, let the adults talk. Now, answer the question Spike” “In fact, I’m eleven…” “What, seriously?” Asked both Hondo and Cookie. “But for being the god of chaos I thought you were a little older…” “That was Discord” explained Spike. “No, Sweetie is a year older than me” “But Spike is very considerate and kind with me” said Sweetie Belle. “He’s nice, fun and happy. Always listen to my ideas whenever we put the world upside down and he dance very well, you should see him at the Gala” Both parents stared to Spike making the poor dragon even more nervous, but suddenly they began to laugh loudly. “Hahahahahahaha! Don’t worry pal, we were just messing with you” “Yeah, we always wanted to mock our daughter’s coltfriend when they find one. We thought we were going to use this routine with Rarity but she’s too picky” Rarity blushed a little annoyed but still smiled. Apparently her parents were always the same. Then Hondo gave a friendly punch to Spike’s shoulder. “And tell my Spike, can I call you Spike, right? After all we are before a god” Spike, now relieved, nodded. “Only if I can call you Hondo and to your wife Cookie” “Deal!” Cheered the mare. “But tell us Spike, how’s that our daughter ended up being the fillyfriend of a god? A god for Celestia’s sake! We really want to know!” Spike exchanged a look with Sweetie, who dedicated him a playful smile. “You haven’t tell them Sweetie? But all your friends know it already!” “Because I wanted them to meet my special somedragon before, Spike” said Sweetie. “Mom, dad, have you seen my new Cutie Mark, right?” Cookie looked at the black music note on her daughter’s flank and nodded. “Now that you mention it, I thought it was weird why you didn’t told us how you obtained it at the very beginning” “And for me, what kind of father stares at his daughter’s flank, huh?” Rarity facehoofed, yeah, her parents were exactly the same. “Dad, they’re still kids, please!” Sighed Rarity. “However, show them your power already Sweetie, I think they want to see it” “Alright!” Cheered the filly. “Everypony a step backwards!” They obeyed and then Sweetie closed her eyes to become Black. Unbelievable, their parents’ jaw dropped to the floor not believing this. “An agent of chaos… our daughter is an agent of chaos…” mumbled Cookie trembling. “OH, THIS IS SO GREAT!!” “YEP! FANTASTIC! We always wanted to our daughters go far but this, this is a whole new level! We have a Guardian of Harmony and an Agent of Chaos!” The older couple cleaned up a tear of pride while Spike and Sweetie smiled to each other. Then the train arrived and they hoped in to Canterlot. “Oh, now that I think about it, Spike did you took Sweetie to a date at the book fair already?” Wanted to know Cookie. “Because we wanted to give a good impression to her special somepony, I mean dragon, but… you invented that fair, aren’t you going to bore there? Because we can do something else if you want” “Don’t worry about it” said Spike. “In fact I haven’t had the chance to explore my invention. I don’t like to do this things alone and Twi won’t join me since she says that this is a shame for all other book fairs and my friends doesn’t like books that much” So the family sighed relieve and they arrived to Canterlot. “Welcome to Canterlot” announced the driver. “Don’t forget to visit our book fair!” They went out of the train to explore the fair, that became very famous in very little time. Everypony wanted to know how it was a book fair that was literally a fair: “Welcome mares and yentelcolts! Come on, read your own weight in books and win a book!” “Oh that’s for me!” said a pony in the crowd and ran to the stand. In another corner they saw a pony pushing a small refrigerated cart. “Too hot?. Here, refresh yourself with a fanfiction! Fanfictions, only the coolest! Fanfictions, drink your fanfiction!” “Ey, what kind of fanfics you have pal?” “See for yourself: we have drama, OOC, comedy, shipping, crossovers, translations and such” “Give me two shippings with lemmon please” “Two R-Rated fics for the gentlecolt!” Sweetie raised an eyebrow. “What’s lemmon?” “I’ll explain you in a couple of years, let’s go!” Said Rarity. In another stand several foals ended up dizzy while the line to get there were only growing. “This is no normal book mares and gentlecolts! The fastest book ever written, are you brave enough to give it a try?” In another stand the ponies gathered to read the ‘Bumper books’ with so controversial themes that all the readers felt bumped because of its terrible pages. In another side, like any other fair, ponies were selling their products: “Here, here, only the fresher books! Right out of the printing house to your hooves, even the ink is fresh!” The pony in the stand said showing a book with a black liquid dripping out of its pages. Sweetie Belle had a sweat drop on her temple. “Spike, I love you and all but this is way too stupid” “Don’t look at me, since Celestia made it an official event ponies have been having their own ideas” Sweetie rolled her eyes to this but soon she noticed an attraction that called her attention and pulled Spike to it: the Love Book, the most romantic book ever written. Spike was a little uncomfortable with this but he wanted to please Sweetie so he got with it as a gentledragon. Mister and Miss Belle just smiled to this. “A humble and kind god of chaos” said Cookie. “Yeah, but we still don’t know when’s the wedding or when are they planning to give us grandkids” “That’s for Rarity’s coltfriend interrogation dear” “I know, but she doesn’t seem to go anywhere so I have my hopes in Sweetie” Rarity glared angrily at her father. “Excuse me for have standards. Now, I’ll enjoy this side of the fair on my own, I hope you don’t mind” And she walked away offended and entered to the first stand she found: read her own weight in books to win a book, stupid and all but she’ll took her time to calm down and going back to her family. But there she saw the only pony who could make her mood worse: a certain white unicorn with blond mane and blue eyes. “Oh, Miss Rarity Belle is so good to see you in this event” smiled Blue Blood. “Blue Blood! What are you doing here?” “Trying to win a book of course” said the stallion calmly while he placed a finished book in a pile at his left and taking a new one. “A ridiculous concept but is more interesting than just go to the library. Now, sorry if I bothered you miss Rarity Belle, I’ll go back to my reading now” Rarity was astonished at first but then she remembered Blue Blood’s true personality and shrugged. Anyway, she sat at his side and began to read as well. She finished her book and was about to take a new one but Blue Blood was faster. “Oh, I’m so sorry, were you going to take this book miss Rarity Belle?” He asked when he noticed Rarity. “Please take it, there’s plenty of reading here” He picked a new one and kept reading while Rarity couldn’t help but smile. She kind of liked the real Blue Blood, almost like a friend. And when the fanfiction seller appeared, Blue Blood was kind enough to buy her one. “A drama with extra intrigue my good sir” he said. “And, do you want some miss Rarity Belle?” “What? Me?” “Of course. Considering I have to act like a jerk because of my job I don’t have many friends and being one of the few ponies who know the real me, is just right for me to invite you to a treat because I consider you a friend. If I’m wrong please forgive me” Rarity smiled to him, still confused but happy. “Well, thank you Blue Blood, and I kindly accept your invitation. Please give me a light shipping good man, with no lemmon. With double no-lemmon in fact” “Just romantic insinuation, got it” said the seller giving them the drinks. They kept reading together, it was kind of nice. Now back to the family, they just went out of the Bumper Books, leaving the place all uncomfortable and hurt, at least the older couple. “Say dear, have you ever read that kind of controversial opinions?” Asked Cookie. Her husband shook his head, “No, I consider myself a non-political individual, but that author was just… wow” By their way Spike and Sweetie still had their doubts about the book. “Say, did understood what abortion meant?” “No but it sounded like a tendency, right?” “What you mean?” “Not remember that the author said that every day more young mares choose it?” They scratched their heads while the Belles sighed relieved that they were still innocent. At the end of the day it was a good experience, everypony had fun exploring all the book-themed attractions: the ‘Literature freaks’ like the shortest book ever written, the only best seller that kept on top by five whole years, a book so heavy that only the strongest ponies could read; and all ended with a good lunch of fried books, mashed theater and to drink a fanfiction. Oh, and they had chocolate poems for dessert. Yup, a good day. Even Rarity had her fun once she calmed down, she and Blue went to eat a satiric salad dressed with irony and a good nonfiction-prose to drink. And to thank him for his kindness from earlier, this time Rarity invited the lunch. “Are you sure miss Rarity Belle? My lunch was more expensive” “Don’t worry about it Blue Blood, surprisingly enough I enjoyed your company” Blue Blood was about to say something, when he suddenly pushed Rarity to a mud pond. “BLUE BLOOD I THOUGHT YOU WERE A GOOD PONY!” But she shut up when she noticed a huge dictionary left Blue Blood unconscious in the place she was seconds ago. “Oh Blue Blood, what happened? Are you alright?” Another book was sent to Rarity but this time she stopped with her magic. “What’s going on here?” “BOOK FIGHT!!” “YEAH, BOOK FIGHT!” The chaos began, everypony throwing books to everypony in an intense fight without alliances of any kind. For example the whole volumes of an encyclopedia was about to knock down Mister and Miss Belle but Spike reacted quickly and answered the attack with a collection of fairytales. Unfortunately he was hit on the back by Leon Coltstoi’s ‘War and Peace’ leaving him out of the combat. The fight kept going and going with everypony throwing all kinds of books to each other: since juvenile novels about fairies who believed they were vampires to philosophy or text books of all grades and for all ages. It was chaos, nopony was standing without a wound of honor. Everypony except one, who waited in the shadows and threw the books at the right time always hitting her target with assassin precision. Her name was Sinon, a unicorn under command of the Lighting Flash and one of the deadliest members of the Lunar Guard. Better known as the Cold-Hearted Snipper she was unbeatable. Helped with her binoculars and the shadow, this girl was the best soldier on this battlefield and the result was inevitable. She defeated eveypony with little effort; each and everypony was hit by Sinon and her monstrous skill. “So what do I won?” Asked Sinon when it was over. “A book!” “Oh, Pony Art Online. I love this series especially the Phantom Bullet arc, thank you very much” Spike woke up rubbing his head, “So what happened?” “Book fight, you lost” explained Sweetie. “Shall we go home?” “Yeah, let’s just find Rarity” said Cookie. They found her grabbing the poor unconscious Blue Blood to the infirmary but they helped her to finish soon and they were back to Ponyville right when Luna was rising the moon. Short trip but funny on its own way. “So I’m glad to say my daughter found herself a great party” said Hondo. “And I must admit I’m surprised to see she’s an agent of chaos and all but I’m glad. Good to know you Spike” “Thank you mister Hondo, and I hope we keep contact” “You better, I must check what’s my daughter onto” said Cookie. At the end everything was fine, as always. But really far from there, in the limits of the far Reptilia, a strange figure appeared. Not too big but intimidating as only itself dressing a long gray hood that covered his face. “My enemies call me, Hooded Avenger”