Fallout Equestria: Icicle

by PlagenShiki

Chapter 26 - Grimoire

        It is another sunny day as my sister and I walk to school. She is clumsy and shy, so I’m glad our town is so small we only have a one room schoolhouse. I can keep an eye on her; She tends to get bullied. But when we are alone like this, she smiles and acts without a care in the world. I love her smile. I feel privileged when I see it, since she only shows it to mom, dad, and me.

        “I want to be just like Rainbow Dash when I’m older!” She declares happily. “She’s so awesome, and not clumsy at all like me.”

        “Oh? You’ve got a ways to go then, Spell. You’re a unicorn, not a pegasus, after all. But I wouldn’t mind if you remained clumsy forever. I find it cute,” I tease her.

        She puffs out her cheeks. “Grim! You’re so mean!” She says, but then giggles at me. I chuckle along with her. After a few minutes, we arrive at the schoolhouse. I step through the door with Spell right behind me. She stumbles on the slight step up and falls on her face. “Uuu,” She groans and I move to help her up.

        “Oh my, Spell Book, are you alright? That was quite a spill,” Our teacher Mr. Pencilpusher asks, walking up to us.

        “She’s fine sir. It happens so often she’s toughened up from it,” I tell him. Despite me saying this, tears hang at the edges of Spell’s eyes.

        She sniffles and mutters, “Oww…,” rubbing her nose.

        “Come on sis’, let’s get you to your desk,” I say, lifting her up to her hooves.

        Mr. Pencilpusher chuckles. “You’re such a good older brother, Grimoire. Spell Book is lucky to have you,” He says with a smile. A few minutes later, he starts class and we begin our lessons.

        “Mom! Dad! I’m graduating from the elementary school level tomorrow. You’ll come, won’t you?” I ask. Mom and Dad chuckle as they sit on the living room couch.

        “Of course, honey. We wouldn’t miss it for the world,” Mom tells me with a kind smile.

        “It is hard to believe that much time has passed already. Feels like just the other day you were learning to walk,” Dad says with a beaming smile.

        Spell walks into the room to see what the commotion is about. “I want to graduate too!” She declares, pouting. “It’s not fair!”

        “Oh come one, Spell,” I tell her. “You’re only two years behind me. You’ll graduate soon enough. And besides, it isn’t like I’ll be going anywhere. We’ll still be in the same room for classes.”

        “But...but!” She starts, but I give her a teasing smile. She’s so adorable when she gets flustered.

        “Besides, a filly who is as bad as you at math won’t be able to graduate from elementary school even in two years,” I tease.

        “Nuh-uh! I’m not that bad at math! Twelve times seven is eighty four! See! I’m not bad at math!” She says stubbornly.

        “We know you can multiply, but you can’t do algebra. If you have x^2+6x+9, what are the zeros?” I ask her.

        “Wha-uh, let’s see...uh...Shut up!” She replies.

        I laugh and smile at her. “Don’t worry Spell, I can help you with your math,” I tell her, putting my hoof on her head and stroking her mane. “You’ll be able to graduate no problem!” I declare.

        “Y-You mean it?!” She says excitedly.

        “Of course! You’re my little sister, of course I’ll help you out. Now, let’s go get some paper and I’ll show you how to do that problem,” I tell her, heading towards the kitchen.

        “Okay~♪” She says happily, following after me.

        “Happy Birthday!” Mom and Dad yell as I blow out the candles on my cake. Dad chuckles. “Fourteen years old, hu? We’re really going to have to start worrying about keeping the mares away from you, hu?” He teases. I feel myself blushing slightly.

        “Oh darling,” Mom says to him, “I’m sure he already has the mares fawning all over him.”

        “Nuh-uh!” Spell declares. To be honest, hearing that so bluntly kind of hurts. “And I’ll keep them away myself! Grim is going to be all mine!” She shouts.

        I smile at her and pat her head. “Of course. Who needs those other mares when I have my adorable little sister to keep me company?” I say. “I’m more worried about all the colts that will be hitting on you when you’re older,” I tell her.

        “Eww,” She says, sticking out her tongue. “Colts are gross,” She mutters. We all laugh at her statement. That’s ok, Spell. I won’t let any colts hurt you. I’m your big brother, after all.

        “You’ll be turning twelve next month, right Spell?” I ask her.

        “Yep! Are you going to get me a present Grim!?” She asks excitedly, her eyes sparkling.

        I can’t help but tease her in return. “Maybe,” I say with a smile.

        “Uuu, are you or aren’t you!” She pouts. We all share another laugh at her pouting.

        A loud noise is echoing throughout the town. It is annoying, I wish it would stop. It just keeps droning on and on. I’m in the park with Spell when dad runs over to us. “Grimoire, Spell Book! We have to get back home right now. Something very bad is happening,” He tells us. Dad looks very shaken and he is practically out of breath.

        “Dad, what’s wrong?” I ask him, but he just picks Spell up on his back and turns back towards our house. “What’s going on dad?” I yell as I follow after him.

        “Something very bad son,” Is all that he tells me. He is running so fast I barely manage to keep up. As we get near the house, I see a bright flash on the horizon to the east. A plume of smoke or dust rises shortly after. “Oh no,” Dad mutters as he stares at the horizon. “Inside, now! Get downstairs!” He shouts. I look south and another flash occurs. I don’t know what it is about the flashes, but they are terrifying. It makes me uncomfortable just seeing them. And they keep appearing on the horizon. I swallow and run into the house.

        “Honey!” Mom calls out as we get to the basement. She embraces dad tightly, then Spell and me as well. “I was so worried,” She says, tears streaming down her cheeks. I don’t understand what is going on. But for my parents to act like this, it was very bad.

        “What’s happening?” I ask, hoping to finally get an answer this time.

        “We’re under attack,” Dad tells me, his voice uneven and shaky. “The Zebras, they are using Megaspells. No doubt we are already retaliating. It will be fine, we just have to stay down here for a while,” He says. But his voice made it seem like it wasn’t going to be fine.

        As if to punctuate this face, a loud rumbling sound begins and after a moment I hear the sound of our windows shattering and the house shakes. Spell screams and falls to her haunches, drawing her hooves over her head.

        Once the shaking stops, I go over to her and put my hooves around her. “It’s ok, sis’. It’s going to be ok,” I whisper. Despite my words, my heart is beating fast and I feel terror grip me. Mom and dad join us and wrap their hooves around us as well.

        We spend a hours like this. Not moving, not speaking, only Spell’s crying and the occasional rumble breaking the silence. Shaking followed the rumbling and every time the house shook, I fear it might fall on top of us. Hours go by without a rumble or shaking and we finally break out embrace.

        Dad stands up first. “I’m going to see what’s going on outside,” He tells us and starts walking to the stairs. I stand up and start towards him.

        “Wait,” I call out. “I’ll come too,” I tell him. I can tell dad is scared. He’s shaking, just like me. He is terrified of what he’ll find up there, just like me. He looks at me, then at mom, then back to me and nods. Together we exit the basement, and then the house to stand on our front porch.

        The neighborhood is a mess. Broken windows everywhere, trees snapped in two, some houses collapsed completely, others looking on the verge of doing just that. But everything else seems fine. I start to breath a sigh of relief when I see dad staring out at the east. I turn and look with him.

        Large pillars of smoke are rising from the horizon where brilliant green and orange flames are visible. If not for the fact the sun is going down, casting the sky into an angry red, I don’t think we’d be able to see the flames so clearly. I look toward where I saw the other flashes of light only to see the same flames dancing on the horizon and pillars of smoke rising into the skies. In the direction of Canterlot I see what looks like pink smoke.

        I swallow as I look at the clouds around my town. They form an almost perfect circle. I think I can even see them closing in on us. “Dad?” I say, looking at him. “What’s going to happen now?” I ask.

        He doesn’t answer right away, but when his reply finally comes it isn’t what I want to hear. “I don’t know, son. I don’t know,” He mutters. I see tears forming in his eyes and only then notice my own eyes are becoming blurry with tears as well.

        “W-Why? Why would they do this?” I mutter weakly as the tears begin to fall down my cheeks.

        “I don’t know, son. I don’t know,” Dad repeats. He falls to his haunches as he stares at the horizon, repeating that phrase over and over.

        “Pencilpusher was saying that some of the other led an expedition of the surrounding area,” Dad is telling mom. “They say about five miles in any direction and radiation starts creeping up on you. They say the the land is dead, charred, even burning in some places. They didn’t dare explore into those areas. Can you blame them though?”

        “So we are cut off then?” Mom asks. Dad nods his head. “But what about the government? The Princesses? The Ministry Mares? Surely someone out there is doing something?” She asks.

        Dad shakes his head. “No one has heard from anyone in authority. The mayor’s terminal isn’t connecting to any outside lines. Unless we want to enter the irradiated areas, we are effectively cut off from the outside world,” He says.

        “But then what will we do about food and medical supplies?” Mom asks him.

        “We’re talking about rationing already. Sunny Day’s farm still appears safe as well. It should be able to keep us going for a while,” He tells her. Times really are becoming uncertain. Dad also mentions a restriction on having foals, since the town can’t afford any new mouths to feed.

        “How are we going to live like this?” Mom asks.

        “Things will be fine,” He tells her. “We just have to take things one day at a time. If the government is still functioning, I’m sure someone will contact us soon. We’ll be fine. No one in town got too badly injured. Both the mayor and the sheriff have said order will be maintained. We will live just like we used to,” Dad says.

        Mom frowns. “What about my parents and sister in Manehatten? And your parents in Canterlot? What of them? Are we to just sit here and wonder what became of them?” She asks.

        Dad shakes his head. “That’s all we can do honey. But given the flames on the horizon, I worry for their safety. It has been days the the flames still burn. I think we are just lucky to have been spared the destruction that is surrounding us,” He tells her.

        “But what of the clouds dear?” Mom asks. “They are completely obscuring the sky! Why aren’t the Pegasi dealing with them? Won’t Sunny Day’s crops fail without proper sunlight and regulated rain?”

        “They will be fine. They are about ready for harvest now, so a few weeks lacking sunlight should not do much damage. The clouds aren’t too thick either, the sun still shines through them well enough,” He replies.

        Just then, dad notices me listening in on their conversation and smiles at me. “Ah, Grimoire! Mr. Pencilpusher said he plans to start up classes again tomorrow. You and Spell Book should get your things ready,” He tells me. I nod and leave the room

        Things have gotten bad in town. The mayor, who has been handling the food rationing is being constantly yelled at by ponies begging for more food. A portion of the town has even set up camp outside his office to protest the rationing. The sheriff is doing what he can to ensure order, but things are getting restless.

        I stare out the window at the fires burning outside his office that the protesters are using to keep warm. It looks like things are peaceful for now at least. It is getting cold outside, but they are more concerned with their hunger than the cold.

        Dad’s voice suddenly comes downstairs. “Pencilpusher, calm down. There is no need to do this, the mayor will take care of things. If you and your friends just leave, we’ll forget all about this,” He says. His voice has a hint of worry in it.

        “No, no. Listen. Just give us what food you have, and we’ll be on our way,” Mr. Pencilpusher replies. He sounds stressed. “Come on now, hand it over.”

        “We can’t do that. We have Grimoire and Spell Book, you know that. What will they eat? Think about what you’re doing!” Dad shouts back. “We are friends, aren’t we? We’ve known each other since school! Stop this!” He pleas.

        “No, you think. We haven’t heard anything from the outside for years! YEARS!” Mr. Pencilpusher shouts. “The world is over. No one else is alive, don’t you understand! If they were, we would have seen someone, anyone by now! Not a single living thing has shown up! Not even animals!” He yells, sounding like he has gone mad. Is this really the teacher I once knew?

        Spell comes into my room. “Grim, what’s going on?” She asks me. Her eyes are filled with concern. I pat her on the head and mess up her mane.

        “I’m sure it isn’t anything to worry about. Dad will handle it. Let’s just wait up here for now,” I tell her with a smile. She wrinkles up her nose as I ruffle up her mane.

        Dad’s voice comes next. “Of course not, it is irradiated. We have to hunker down until the radiation levels drop low enough to safely travel. We just have to stay calm, and wait,” He says.

        I hear a hoof stomp. “Wait? For what? If they really wanted to, if they were alive, they could get us with vertibucks or skycarriages. Or at least drop off aid. The fact we haven’t seen so much as a hint of that, means no help is coming,” Mr. Pencilpusher replies.

        “Pencilpusher’s right, ya’know,” A mare agrees. “It is time to change things. We need to start deciding what will happen next. Cut down our population to a more manageable level. The mayor has no plan, he’s a fool. We need a change of leadership,” she says.

        “What are you saying? You’re the mayor’s secretary! Things are fine, we just have to maintain order!” Dad declares.

        “It is because I am his secretary that I know how much of a fool he is,” The mare replies.

        “That’s enough,” Mr. Pencilpusher says. “Listen, since we are old friends I’ll give you an offer. A group of us are planning to take charge. If you give us your food, your family can join with us and no harm will come to any of them.”

        “Join with you?” Mom says, sounding disgusted. “What you’re talking about is horrible. You can’t decide who is going to live and die!”

        “I agree, you’re all mad. You won’t get a crumb of our food. Now leave,” Dad tells them.

        “That’s a shame,” Says a buck. I hear mom and dad gasp. “Just say the word, Pencilpusher.”

        “Tell him to put the gun down, there is no need for this,” Dad says.

        “Just give us your food and no one will get hurt,” Mr. Pencilpusher replies.

        “We can’t do that,” Dad replies. “Our children need it.”

        “Do it,” Mr. Pencilpusher says. A gunshot follows, then mom screams, and two more gunshots follow that. “Take what they have,” He says. I gasp and Spell clings to me tightly.

        “What about the kids?” The buck asks.

        “Leave them for now,” Mr. Pencilpusher replies. “No doubt others heard the gunshots. The sheriff will probably start investigating. We need to move our plans forward.” Spell and I stay in my room for the next few minutes, not knowing what will happen next. Hoofsteps go through the kitchen and eventually they exit out the front door. The house is silent.

        “Wait here,” I tell Spell, standing up off the floor and make my way downstairs and into the living room. In the middle of the room are mom and dad and under them is a puddle of blood. I run over to them and kneel beside dad. I shake him. “Dad! Dad!” I call out, but he doesn’t respond.

        Then I notice the bullet hole in his head. “No…” I mutter. I shake mom and call out to her, but she is as unresponsive as dad. She has a gunshot wound in her leg and neck. I swallow. “Mom...dad…” I mutter. They’re dead, and Mr. Pencilpusher killed them.

        I hear shouting coming from outside followed shortly after by gunfire. I get back to my hooves and run back up to my room. Running up to the window, I look out of it. Ponies are running around, some have guns others do not. I see one shoot another without a weapon moments before the sheriff shoots them. More of the police come to the sheriff’s aid, but other armed ponies are swarming them.

        “Spell, we need to leave. Get a bag together and fill it with everything you need that you can carry. I’m going to get some supplies, so lock yourself in your room and don’t come out until I come get you, ok?” I tell her.

        “What about mom and dad?” She asks.

        I wish I had time to tell her kindly, but we aren’t going to be safe for long. “They are dead. We have to leave or we will die too. Mr. Pencilpusher and some others in town are doing bad things,” I reply.

        “W-what?” She stutters.

        “Just go get your things together,” I say, lifting her to her hooves and pushing her to her room. “I’ll be back in ten minutes, be ready, ok?” I tell her, and then close her door. “Don’t forget to lock it!” I call back as I run down the stairs.

        I need to get us food and medical supplies. We can’t stay in town, so we need to leave. We’ll need radaway and rad-x, and other supplies for regular injuries. I bite my lip. I’ll have to steal, there’s no time, and I’m not sure who I can trust now. My heart thunders in my chest as I run. Don’t worry Spell, I’ll get us out of here.

        “Hey Spell, this is the last of our food. Eat it, you’ll need it more than I do. The radiation sickness is getting to you. I’ll have to up your dosage of radaway,” I tell Spell, giving her the last of our rations.

        She looks at me sadly. “But Grim, you need it. You’re the one doing all the work. And you’re already taking less radaway than I am! Your mane is starting to fall out!” Spell replies.

        I wave her off. “Oh that? I suppose I’m just suffering from premature balding,” I say with a smile. “I feel fine, so don’t worry. I’m sure we will find a safe place soon.”

        “But it has already been a month since we left! Everything is irradiated!” She says.

        “We just have to get further from the large cities. Find a place like home, a better place. A place far enough away from the blasts to be radiation free,” I explain. “I’m sure we are close to one.” I pull out our map and look at it. Somewhere near the Hayseed Swamps, maybe? We are close enough, we should check it out.

        Spell frowns. “You said that last week, too,” She mutters.

        “Well, now we are one week closer to our destination,” I tell her, then try to mask a grimace. My headache is getting worse. Thankfully my fever isn’t too bad yet. “Eat up, and let’s keep going,” I tell her. If my map is right, we should run into a railroad in a few minutes, then it is just a walk east a ways and then south across a river.

        I set my saddlebags down as Spell reluctantly eats the last of our food. Two and a half bags of radaway, six doses of rad-x, one and a half bottles of water, and no food. We haven’t had to use any of the medical supplies I stole yet, so I suppose that is a silver lining.

        My vision spins a bit and I shake my head. Great, that’s the dizziness and disorientation setting in. So that’s...severe radiation exposure, I think. I can’t let Spell know. She might realize I’ve only been taking a sip of radaway every few days. But if she’s alright, that is all that matters.

        Spell finishes the food and I put my bags back on. “Ready Spell?” I ask her with a smile.

        She nods. “Let’s keep going, Grim. We need to find something for you to eat,” She tells me, returning my smile.

        I pant as I hold the bloody knife in my magic. I stand over the pig-like creature I just killed. It is deformed with fleshy tumors on it. “Spell? Are you alright?” I ask her.

        “Uh...uh-hu. But you’re bleeding Grim,” She tells me. I blink at her and then look down at myself. My left front leg is bleeding from where the pig must have bit me. Dropping the knife I pull out a roll of bandages and quickly wrap my leg.

        Then I look at the dead pig. It is the first thing I’ve ever killed. “It just attacked us…” I mutter. No sooner had we gotten in the Hayseed Swamps than it set itself upon us. As I stare at it, my stomach rumbles. A terrible thought occurs to me. “Spell, do you suppose we can eat this?” I say.

        “What!?” She says, sounding mortified. “But it’s an animal. Ponies don’t eat meat,” She tells me.

        I swallow. “Yea, but I mean other animals eat meat. Why can’t we? Besides, we don’t know when we might find food. Anything is better than nothing, right?” I reply.

        Spell wrinkles her nose. “But it looks like it has been exposed to radiation. Will it be safe?” She mutters.

        “I’m sure a little more radiation won’t kill us. We have some radaway left and it looks like there isn’t much radiation here. Perhaps we can even live here for a while. Hunt, find some edible plants, wait for things to become less irradiated elsewhere. But for now, food takes priority,” I tell Spell.

        I pick the knife back up. “You should look away, sis,” I tell her. She turns away and I plunge the knife into the pig once more.

        I run back through the swamp to our makeshift hovel. “Hey sis! Good news! Things finally seem to be getting back to normal outside the swamp. The geiger isn’t making any noise where it used it!” I tell Spell with a beaming smile.

        “That’s great Grim!” She replies happily. “Do you think we’ll be able to go back out soon?” She asks.

        I nod. “I think in a few more months, a good enough portion of the lands away from the major impact sites should be free of radiation. Maybe we will even find a town with actual ponies in it!” I reply.

        “Months?” Spell complains. “But it has already been years since we’ve seen another living pony! It is lonely. No offence Grim,” She adds.

        I just give her a smile. “None taken. I understand what you mean. It would be nice to see someone else,” I tell her. Though, I personally don’t care if it remains just the two of us. Less chance of things happening like they did back at home. I trusted Pencilpusher and he killed mom and dad. It is best not to trust anyone now.

        “Let’s see about getting stocked up on supplies for when we decide to journey out of the swamp, ok?” I tell her. As much as I want to stay here alone with Spell, she wants to find others. It would be wrong of me to keep her here against her will.

        “Ok,” She replies. “I’ll see what kind of herbs I can stock up on between now and then,” She tells me. I’ll protect her no matter what comes our way. Whether we stay here or journey back into the unknown.

        “Why don’t you two live with me for a while. I have extra room and you can help out around the house to earn your keep,” The older buck tells us. He says his name is Noblesse and he has a glint in his eyes that shows his intelligence. He makes me anxious.

        “Why offer us a place to stay?” I ask him. “You have nothing to gain from it.” Noblesse smiles at me broadly and shakes his head.

        “Of course not,” He replies. “But I don’t expect anything from it. You two are alone, lost in the world. I just want to make sure that good ponies such as yourselves get a fair shot at surviving in this new world.”

        “Why would you do that?” I ask. He frowns ever so slightly.

        “I’d like to believe that ponies are still inherently good. The world has gone to shit and many ponies with it. You two strike me as two that are still good, untainted by the wasteland. I want to help you for as long as I can. And to educate you,” Noblesse tells me.

        “Educate us? What do you mean? We both basically graduated from school,” I reply.

        “This knowledge isn’t in books. It is about the world as it is now. You two seem to have been away from civilization for a long while. Years, perhaps. Things have changed. But, we shouldn’t discuss this outside in the open. Let’s go back to my home,” Noblesse says, gesturing for us to follow him.

        Spell follows him immediately, but I hesitate. Pencilpusher was kind up to the day he killed our parents. I look to the knife strapped to my leg and then follow after them. He leads us to a simple single story house. Like the rest of the town, it is run down and dirty, but the inside is much cleaner. One of the cleaner places I’ve seen since we left home.

        The buck gestures to a couch as he sits across from it in a reclining chair. “First of all, don’t trust ponies straight away. Spell Book, was it?” He says, addressing my sister. “You followed me right away without protest. Your brother, Grimoire, however hesitated, he even made sure his knife was at the ready.” He noticed?

        He sees my look of surprise. “I saw. That’s another thing you need to learn to do. Be ever observant. You never know who or what will be after you. Treat everything with suspicion and always look for a way out if things go south,” He tells us.

        Spell tilts her head. “But why shouldn’t we trust ponies? Why do we have to be suspicious of everyone we meet?” She asks.

        “Because you can never tell who is going to try to steal from you, kill you, or worse,” Noblesse explains. “Even some who seem to be the kindest in the whole world can turn on you to get what they want. Of course, you should be suspicious of me as well.”

        “So, you want us to be suspicious of you, yet live here with you?” I ask him. “Don’t you think that is a little messed up?”

        He shakes his head. “Not at all. Constantly worrying if I am going to do something will help the two of you to sharpen your reflexes and know how to stay alert. You’ll need to do just that wherever you go in the wasteland. Even in towns like this, because it sure isn’t a safe place,” He replies.

        Spell speaks up at this, “You stay here even though it isn’t safe?” Noblesse nods.

        “The town is safer than outside it, relatively speaking. But even within problems are plentiful. While there is a sort of agreement that no one will kill another, that is the extent of things. The guards are supposed to stop theft and assault, but they are corrupt,” He explains.

        “If someone wants something, they’ll take it. If you try to stop them they’ll beat you till you let them. And the drug dealers will take every opportunity to try and get you addicted to their chems,” Noblesse tells us. “While your life isn’t in danger, everything else is.”

        “Is the outside really that bad?” Spell asks.

        “Worse,” Noblesse says with a grimace. “There are manticores, bloodwings, radgators, and other mutated creatures the radiation and taint got to. Then there are the raiders who steal and kill you, the pockets of radiation and taint that will kill you, the dangerous ruins that will kill you, hell, the entire wasteland wants to kill you. I know, I’ve done a bit of exploring.”

        “So you are saying we should just hide away from the world in a town?” I ask him. “Never leaving and living in constant fear and suspicion?” We should have stayed in the swamp.

        “No,” He replies. “You just need to learn about the wasteland properly before going out into it unprepared. I take it neither of you have a gun? Get one. Learn to use it. If you choose to go back into the wasteland, know how to fight back against it,” He tells us.

        “For now, how about something to eat?” Noblesse tells us. “You can decide to stay or go afterwards.”

        “Noblesse, thank you for everything up till now. Spell and I won’t be able to repay for you all you’ve done,” I thank Noblesse.

        “Think nothing of it,” He replies. “But are you sure you two want to leave? You know you two can stay here for as long as you want.”

        “We know,” Spell tells him. “But we want to see if there is a town out there that is safer. A town in which you don’t have to live in fear. If we find one, we’ll come back and get you.”

        I chuckle. “Heck, maybe we will make our town and keep it safe ourselves. You could always come with us, Noblesse,” I suggest.

        He shakes his head. “I’m afraid I’m too old for adventuring now. But, if you find such a town, let me know. It will be good to see you two again,” He says.

        We give Noblesse our final goodbyes and then set out back into the wasteland.

        I return to the ruined house we choose to take shelter in for the night after hunting down a parasprite. But as I near the house, I hear voices. I don’t hear Spell’s. I creep up to the house and peer in through a window. In the waning light of the setting sun, what I see freezes the very blood in my veins. My eyes go wide and my mouth gapes.

        Raiders. Two of them are in the house. One of them is standing off to the side, laughing at something the other said. The other one...He...he is...I swallow and grit my teeth and a boiling rage comes over me. It is an emotion I’ve never felt before, not even when my parents were murdered. Pure hatred. If I could kill the raider with my glare, he would be nothing but ashes.

        Under him is the body of my sister, her throat slit and blood pooling under her. Just by looking, I can tell she is already dead. But this raider...he...he is raping her corpse. I snarl, throwing off my saddlebags and drawing both my pistol and my bat. I charge into the house and hit the rapist over the head with my bat, catching him by surprise. He falls over, unconscious and I point my pistol at the other raider.

        I suck in a breath. “I’m going to ask you a question. Answer me. Which one of you cut my sister’s throat?” I spit at him.

        The raider chuckles. “What does it matter? She’s dead. If you kill us, the rest of our gang will come looking for you, kid. You should run away now, while I’m still feeling generous,” He replies.

        I grind my teeth as I glare at him, starting to pull the trigger, but I stop, unable to kill him. Why? Why can’t I kill him? I scream. I throw the pistol aside and lunge at him with the bat. I beat him, again and again until he stops moving. He is still breathing, but barely. I pick the gun up again, and put it to his head. Just pull the trigger, Grimoire. Pull the trigger and take revenge! But the gun shakes in my magic and I can’t do it. I can’t kill a pony, no matter how much they deserve it.

        I turn to the rapist, who is still out of it on the floor next to my sister. I go out to my bags and grab my knife, then return to the rapist’s side. I spread his rear legs, ready the knife, and geld him. If I can’t kill him, I can at least make it so he can’t rape another pony for a while. But why? Why can’t I kill them!? I let out a sigh and turn to look at my sister’s body.

        As I gaze at her, I no longer feel hatred, anger, or the want to kill the raiders. I feel only sorrow and regret. I sat beside her body as tears welled up in my eyes. “Spell Book,” I mutter. She was everything to me. My sister, my friend...the mare that I loved. I never told her how I truly felt or the truth about the two of us.

        “Hey Spell, did you know that we aren’t actually related?” I mutter weakly. “Mom was pregnant with you when your real father died in the war. My real mother died in an accident when I was one. When I was around three though, dad met mom, and you were one at the time. I barely remember it, mom and dad’s wedding,” I tell her.

        “We grew up together and I looked out for you. It wasn’t until I was around twelve that I realized I loved you more than just a sister. At fifteen, I talked to mom and dad about it. They said when I was ready, I could tell you the truth, and how I felt about you. They gave me their blessing,” I say sadly.

        “I never had the courage. I didn’t want things to change between us. If I told you how I really felt, and you rejected me, I felt as thought you would drift away from me. So I kept quiet. I wanted to protect you from everything. Especially now. But I…” I trail off. “I can’t even kill the bastards who murdered and raped you!”

        “I’m so sorry, Spell. I’m a failure as a big brother and as someone who loved you,” I tell her as the tears continue to fall. After a few minutes, I finally bring myself back to my senses. I gather our things, pick up Spell’s body, and leave the ruined house. I walk for about a mile and then I start digging.

        It is a small alcove at the edge of White Tail Woods where the woods meet the mountains. I dig Spell’s grave and mark it with fallen wood. I use my knife to carve her name into the wood and lay her body into the earth. Solemnly, I begin to bury her as new tears form. All the while, I repeat the same three words over and over again. “I’m so sorry.”

        “Ah, Grimoire. You did a good job getting that cache of spark batteries the other day. Ready for another scavenging bounty?” Lilac, the owner of the bar I frequent asks. I nod without saying a word. “Still not saying anything, hu? One of these days I’ll get you to talk,” She says with a wink.

        At my stoic expression, she lets out a sigh and pulls a piece of paper from behind the back. “Here’s the next one. The client wants a memory orb that is rumored to be in an old MoM facility, it is rumored to be a memory of one of the Ministry Mares. The facility will probably have some fierce security,” She tells me. She hands the paper out to me.

        I go to grab it, but she yanks it back. “You sure you don’t want to go after some raiders? Those bounties pay out higher, and with your skills you could handle them easily,” She says. I shake my head. I still can’t bring myself to kill a pony, after all. No matter how bad they are. I’ll fight them off if they cross me, but I never do more than knock them out.

        “Ok,” She says, giving me the contract. “But it really would help out if someone with your talents started standing up against the raiders.” I shrug as I put the contract in my bags and turn away from the bar. A heavily guarded MoM facility to search for a memory orb? Sounds like it will be a lot of tough work for something completely unimportant.

        Excellent. Maybe this time I will die. There isn’t a point of going on without Spell if I can’t avenge her. No one will care if I botch this one up. It is just a memory orb, after not. Not spark batteries that a town is counting on. Not a water purification talisman that will purify a town’s water supply.

        Well, MoM facility. Do your worst. I’m ready.

        Twelve sentry bots, six protectaponies, a dozen or so turrets, and three doors locked with terminals. I manage to pass through all the security of the facility while only sustaining minor wounds. I consider letting myself bleed out, but decide against it. That would be the cowardly way to go. Instead I patch myself up and start looting the facility.

        Most of what I encounter is bland paperwork that has long since been made irrelevant by the passage of time. The occasional trinket lays around that I snag to make some extra money as I look for the memory orb.

        After a while, I stumble across a small case buried under papers in an office that was locked by a particularly tough lock. A note is taped to the top of it that reads: “Miss Pie’s requested this particular memory orb. Apparently Miss Sparkle found out about the Neighagra Falls facility and we had to wipe her memory of it. Actual details of the facility are in a different orb held on location. Miss Pie has left specific instructions that his orb is not to be viewed.”

        A facility at Neighagra Falls, hu? I wonder if this is the memory orb the client wants. I toss the note aside and put the case in my bags. I should look around some more to make sure. Spending the next hour I go over the facility. This is definitely the only memory orb in here. I readjust my bags and head out of the facility.

        Now it is off to the client to give him the orb and then back to Lilac to get payment. Perhaps I’ll skip on another contract for now and check out that facility at Neighagra. Maybe it will have something that can kill me.

        I grimace as I look over the lake at the bottom of Neighagra Falls. It is filthy and, judging by my geiger counter, highly irradiated. Now, where is that facility? I look around but don’t see anything that sticks out. I consider looking inside the dams, but why would that note say Neighagra Falls instead of specifying the dams? No, the facility has to be somewhere around the falls.

        I spend a few hours climbing up and down the stairs on the cliff near the falls, looking for any sort of entrance at the top or bottom. Nothing stands out. Makes sense, since it is apparently a huge secret. I think for a moment and then cast a spell to enhance my vision. I’ll look for any imperfections and inspect them carefully.

        After another hour, my enhanced vision crawls over a shade of rock different than the rest of the cliff. I walk over and manage to push it aside, revealing a button. I press it and the side of the cliff closest to the falls begins to move. Two parts come out, one stairs leading up and above that an overhang that blocks the falls.

        I make my way up the stairs into a cavern behind the falls. Near the back is a large door with a terminal beside it. Curled up near the terminal is a skeleton. Bingo. I make my way over to the terminal and hit a few buttons. Input Password. I try a few guesses but it is difficult. I take a moment and turn my attention to the skeleton and notice an audiolog lying with the bones.

        I float it out and play it and a single phrase is muttered: “Okie Dokie Lokie” I raise an eyebrow at the short audiolog. Turning back to the terminal, I type the phrase in as one word. Password Accepted. The door starts to open, showing a small area like a security corridor with another door a few feet into the room. Inside I find another terminal, that isn’t protected by a password that opens the second door.

        Beyond that door is a huge open area filled with multiple desks and other workstations. What is all this? I walk into the room and poke around a bit. I then stumble into a room off to the side, it is full of beds...and bones. Each bed contains a skeleton, looking as if the occupant simply went to sleep and never woke up again. I step back out of the room and look around once more. Two more doors are at the far end of the large room.

        I enter through one of the doors at the end, the one off to the left. Inside are labeled cabinets. I pull one open and look inside. Dozens of cases. I bring one out and open it. Memory orbs? I open a few more and all are filled with the orbs. Putting them back, I walk to the other room.

        Inside the last room is a strange machine in the middle and in the corner is a bin filled with memory orbs. What was this facility used for? Memory modification? A chill runs down my spine. A thought crosses my mind for an instant. I wonder if I could forget about Spell. I immediately shake my head of the thought. Absolutely not! I will never forget her. But…

        What if I do something else with my memories? What if I forget everything but Spell? Would whatever stops me from killing disappear then? Could I finally avenge her? I feel myself begin to tremble as I look around rapidly. My eyes fall upon a book on a nearby desk with the title Memory Extraction Procedures.

        I swallow as I pick the book up in my magic and float it in front of me. I open the book and begin reading. This might work. I can do this. I’ll avenge Spell.