//------------------------------// // Forbidden Desire // Story: Conflicting Emotions [Remastered Edition] // by Eclipse //------------------------------// Twilight sighed, no pony to comfort her, just an enveloping depression, a constant funk that started hanging over the studious mare's head, making her start to give up on what she thought she wanted from life. She didn't care to check up on Pinkie, she just walked to Sugar Cube Corner to get something to ease her depression, if only just making it recede for a bit. She walked in to be greeted by the happy and fairly active Pinkie Pie; bouncing around happily, without a care in the world, her antica always used to cheer Twilight up when she was feeling down, but it didn’t really work today. Unfortunately, Twilight could not feel that same feeling of free-spirit as Pinkie Pie could; though she's always wanted to. Twilight sighed loudly and walked up to the front counter where she was greeted by Mrs. Cake, who proceeded to ask what she wanted. "I'll take a whole cake, marble, with extra frosting. Could you make that an ice cream cake too? And I’ll have a couple dozen cupcakes, whipped icing and cream filling please. And could you use a cream cheese icing, the other icings really don’t taste right to me, and as for the filling, I’d like buttercream icing if you can." Twilight sighed, knowing that the pleasure foods would only curb the feelings for a little bit, and they would really take a hit to her stomach. Mrs. Cake wrote down the specific instructions, because she knew how Twilight was about perfection, being last time she ordered cupcakes she had to have the cupcakes perfectly frosted, and fidgeted around with an icing spatula until the icing was basically gone anyways. Mrs. Cake looked into the depressed mare's eyes, "Okay, just about got it, was there anything else you needed from us dear?" she said with a calm and soothing voice, "Or will that be all you required?" she finished. Twilight looked up, "That's all I want from here yes." she looked down and sighed unhappily. She looked up at Mrs. Cake, "And yes well, could you please point me in the direction of the nearest liquor store? I'd really appreciate it if you could..." Twilight looked shyly down, hoping her request wouldn't set Mrs. Cake off too much; which it did anyways, and also as she said that, Pinkie took notice and came over to her, but said nothing. All she did was give an ominous stare at Twilight, as if she didn't know that side of Twilight that results to comfort food and booze to cheer her up, but the stare from Pinkie wasn’t making Twilight feel too much better either though. Mrs. Cake was slightly shocked, "I-I never took you for that kind of pony Twilight... But there's one over by Quills and Sofas, coming from here, it's on the left side it’s a small building with a little neon sign out front. Dear... Are you okay? You seem... Well, distraught, like something's been eating at you, just remember this, you can talk to us anytime you have a problem dear. That'll be forty-seven bits please, will that be paid in cash, or would you like us to start you a tab?" Mrs. Cake's face was disappointed that Twilight, undoubtedly the smartest pony in all Ponyville was going to ruin and waste her brain cells with the influence of alcohol. But she knew she would be unable to get through to her, so she just let out an exasperated sigh and looked upon the lost mare’s face. Her eyes were screaming for help, and her heart was just screaming for a little love. Twilight happily complied, and took the bits from her saddlebags and paid her, laying out the bits in a perfect stack upon the counter. But when Mrs. Cake counted she looked back at Twilight slightly confused, her eyebrow raised up slightly at the lavender unicorn. "Dear, this is fifty-seven bits. Are you sure you're okay?" Mrs. Cake's voice was now concerned for the lavender colored unicorn. "I'll just go ahead and give you the extra ten bits that you overpaid with back." Mrs. Cake tried to return the money, but Twilight wouldn't take it, the elusive unicorn backing away from the flailing arm trying to return her money as if she didn’t want anything to do with it. Twilight responded, "It's for the extra icing, I mean I want a lot of icing with these, I really mean as much as you can put on it and still be able to close the box." Her face ducked lower, as her expectations for herself grew much lower by the moment, and she didn’t know why she was resorting to all this. "I won't take it back, and I highly thank you for the information. I'll just go ahead and head on over there right now and get out of your manes." Twilight sighed, and lowered her head in shame knowing she was about to indulge two things she didn't think she'd ever do; overeating her usual amounts of sweets, and giving in to the call of the bottle. But she just couldn't resist herself, she'd read in her books that alcohol dims brain cells by blocking certain nerve endings and brain passageways, but will also take away almost any kind of pain; mental or physical. Mrs. Cake nodded, "Well, okay dearie, just please don't drink too much okay? We'd hate to have to see the smartest pony in perhaps all of Equestria, to be running around like a maniac, screaming at random bystanders as if they belonged in a mental asylum. You do not want that, trust me dearie, I know from estensive amounts of experience on the matter." Twilight looked at Mrs. Cake, her innocent face; Twilight never thought that Mrs. Cake had ever touched alcohol, let alone abused its influence. "I was a heavy drinker when I was younger; being that I was just old enough to drink, so I turned to liquor, any kind of liquor actually. I wasn’t very picky when it came to the bottle, I drank Hoovshire, Buck Daniels, Shiner Bock, and almost every type of vodka out there. And then, soon enough, I drank more and more, starting fights, causing quite the ruckus with the ponies around Ponyville. I quit because one day I kind of decided to start a fight with one of Celestia's guards, I was so heavily drunk when they got me on the ground I sort of, maybe, passed out? When I woke up, I was in prison, though Celestia was going to let me go, I still needed to perform some community service. Though I was young and rebellious, I knew better then to defy a direct punishment from Celestia, being the last one was her sister and we all know where that little disagreement led. So I served my time, that's when I met Mr. Cake, I was cleaning up around a shop, it was a bit of a dump though, but I saw that Mr. Cake was out there, our eyes locked and it was like love at first sight. We talked a bit; I found out that he was a custodian for a snooty pair of ponies, and that he absolutely despised his job with them, but it was his only way to make money for the moment. I told him everything I'd done, the drinking, the fights, and what got me on the clean-up team in the first place," A smile emanated from her face, "He didn't care in the slightest sense, he was just an all-around kind colt, and when I’d served my time, we'd formally started dating. And one thing led to another, and here we are happily living together so many years later. Without alcohol, I’d have never met him really; he worked in a secluded part of Ponyville I never really seemed to have reason to venture into. And without him, I would've never gotten over my addiction, funny how these things work themselves out like this huh? So I ask you to please not make the same mistakes I did, I mean, alcohol is okay from time to time, but only in smaller amounts. If you start drinking like a Stalliongrad guard, you might never know what may happen after the world starts fading around you." Mrs. Cake had been talking for about ten minutes, and Twilight was interested in her story, but she was too depressed to heed the old mare's warning near the end, so it just seemed to soar over her head. Twilight put on a fake smile, "I'll be sure not to abuse the substance, I thank you for the warning though." And with that, Twilight left in a haste to get to the liquor store, she just wanted to get there and get out before any pony saw her do so. Though she had unknowingly ingested alcohol before at one of Pinkie’s ‘special events’, she had stopped once she found out what she was drinking. She had never had the sensation of being drunk, her mind contemplated, battling with its own thoughts; was turning to drinking really the best idea for her? She shook the voices from her head, when she found herself in front of the liquor shop; the only thing distinguishing it from any other structure were the bars on the windows and doors, and a small sign saying I.D. is required for the purchasing of alcohol along with a very dimly lit neon sign above the other smaller signs. And slightly above the other signs was a larger one with the royal Equestrian seal saying, 'Consumption of alcohol on the premises is strictly prohibited by order of Celestia of Canterlot.' Twilight shook her head and went inside; and immediately the smell of alcohol filled her nostrils. But for some reason she liked that, the smell luring her inside; making her start to inch slowly into the small market of liquor. A large gray stallion cleared his throat trying to catch Twilight's attention, "Identification if you would please ma'am," he said demandingly, making Twilight cringe at his loud and eerie sounding voice that boomed inside the small shop. Twilight felt stupid, "Oh yes, very sorry about that, but of course sir," Twilight shuffled around in her saddlebags, the sound of coins jingling around as she frantically searched for mean of identification until she finally was able to pull out her I.D. "Here you go sir, extremely sorry about that setback." she blushed slightly, embarrassed that she'd forgotten to get her I.D. out in advance. The stallion nodded, "Everything seems to check out ma'am, feel free to browse our wares all you want. If you're relatively new to drinking, you really might wanna start small. I'm just making a suggestion, but you should maybe try something like a light alcohol, don’t start with anything too heavy beforehoof," he said as he went back to the front door, but was stopped by Twilight, who was still kind of mystified by the exotic smell filling the room. "What is that smell anyways? It's sweet, but it has a hint of alcohol to it." Twilight's nostrils flared up in the exotic scent, smelling the air passionately, making that large stallion chuckle with a mix of confusion and worry for the small lavender mare before him. "That is something relatively new that we just got in stock, Sweet Apple Acres, spiked cider. Apparently Applejack and Macintosh started fermenting in their apple cellar a while back, and still they forgot that they’re actually supposed to check on the apples while they ferment. So all I’m saying to you is it can be strong as hay, but besides that, it certainly is quite the pleasant drink. But if you aren't used to alcohol, it can be a real kick in the teeth when you first try It." the gray stallion said, not shifting much position, just stood there looking at Twilight, "There's a free sample of it at the front desk, all you have to do is just ask my brother if you want to try some. I’m pretty sure that he’ll be more than happy to comply with your demands." After finishing, he then moved back to his position beside the door, looking almost as if Twilight had never spoken to him, but she brushed just it off and moved on to the front counter. "Excuse me, but your um, brother over there told me you had a sample of that new apple cider. I'd truly like to try some, if you don't mind that is..." Twilight listened to herself. Her depression had started to make her sound a bit like Fluttershy, but she quickly snapped out of it when the cashier replied to her. "Oh well sure, I’d be glad to give ya’ a sample. Try to keep from yelling or anything, it’s some pretty strong stuff, buckin’ extreme if you ask me." He said jokingly as he grabbed a bottle which he had made especially for the cider, and poured the cider into a cup and handed it to Twilight. He smiled while Twilight grabbed the cup with her magic and put it up to her lips, and took a sip. As she took that first sip her eyes widened, and she felt a slight burning sensation in the back of her throat. But as she swallowed, it spread out through her body giving her body a very nice and even warmth to it. "Wow that really is a kick in the teeth! I’ve never drank such a strong bucking thing in all of my life!" Twilight exclaimed, getting a chuckle from the cashier. "How much is it for a case?" Twilight inquired of him. He looked at a chart posted, "Well there's bottles and cans, which would you prefer? Bottles are in a pack of four, the cans in a pack of six. But the bottles are 30 fluid ounces each, for those who like to drink quite a bit at a time, and the cans are 20 fluid ounces for those who like to drink a little at a time. Both equal out in total to 120 fluid ounces, and both are the same price, so take your pick." he smiled waiting for an answer from the unicorn, who still felt the warmth of the sample inside her. "I'll take one of each thank you, I suppose I’ll ease into it with the cans, and work my way up to the bottle." she replied getting a soft-hearted chuckle out of the stallion behind the cash register. "How much will that come out to be anyways?" Twilight inquired, having never purchased alcohol before. "That comes out to be thirty bits ma'am," he said calmly grabbing the cider from behind the counter and putting it in a big brown paper bag; wringing up the purchase on his register. “Will that be cash or credit?” Thirty bits?! Twilight thought, anything for comfort I suppose, plus everypony kept telling me to try new things, thought this isn't exactly what they meant by it. "I’m going to be paying in cash,” Twilight replied, digging the money from her saddlebags and handing it to the cashier, who then put the money in the register and packed a small bottle of whiskey into the bag. "Why'd you put in the other thing?" she asked, "I'm pretty sure I didn't buy that... D-Did I?" she thought maybe the alcohol was getting to her, but the stallion smiled at her. "You get a free small bottle of the best-selling whiskey with a purchase of twenty-five bits or more," he replied handing the bag to Twilight. "Have a nice day ma'am, hope to see you again soon. But not too soon ya’ hear?" he said chuckling slightly at his own joke. Twilight smiled, "Oh yes thank you, and have a nice day yourself." she walked out of the liquor store, which she'd been inside of for thirty-eight minutes, the longest that she’d ever spent in one place. "Oh, wow. I really lost track of time. Mrs. Cake said the cakes should be ready in twenty minutes. She tucked the newly bought alcohol in her saddlebags hoping that no pony had seen that she had bought something from inside the store. She then made her way back over to Sugar Cube Corner to get her sweets, still feeling slightly disoriented from the alcohol earlier before, but brushed it off as she entered Sugar Cube Corner. Mrs. Cake smiled, "Your sweets have been done for a while, they’re in the back I'll go ahead fetch them for you dear, I'll be right back." She said as she left into the back room, where Twilight knew there was a fridge and freezer. She came back moments later with the two dozen cupcakes and ice cream cake. "Just like you asked, we put as much icing as we could and still be able to close the box. We had to have Pinkie spread the icing though, we couldn’t get it just right, but she did it without breaking a sweat. She really seems to know you, nice to know she has an interest in such a great pony." she said handing the sweets over to Twilight, as Twilight grabbed them with her magic and smiled at Mrs. Cake, who shared a smile back with her. "Thank you very much Mrs. Cake, I appreciate you taking my request seriously." she replied, her breath still smelled slightly of alcohol, but Mrs. Cake didn't seem to notice. That or she really had one hell of a poker face, preventing Twilight from seeing what she truly was thinking. "Anytime dearie, now run along home, it's getting dark you know." Mrs. Cake said jokingly, smiled, and left from behind the counter to hang a 'closed' sign in the window after she left, then she turned the lights off, and went casually to bed. Twilight thought the day was going pretty well, she'd discovered she had a secret love for strong alcohol, and she'd heard a story from Mrs. Cake, who rarely ever tells tales to any pony. But she couldn't wait to get home so she could open a nice can of apple cider, have a cupcake and relax. Relax... Something she hadn't done for weeks, but with all these ingredients she would make herself relax. She trotted home contently opening the door to the library and taking out the brown paper bag. Little did she know, Spike had not yet gone to bed and was still hanging around in the main room of the library. Spike looked at Twilight, "What's in the brown bag Twi'?" he asked with curiosity in his voice. Twilight shot her gaze to him, and quickly hid the bag behind her back. "What bag? I see no bag! eheheheh..." Twilight was sheepish and anxious, but Spike's gaze made her sigh. "Don't tell any pony, but..." She brought Spike closer to herself, "I bought myself some alcohol today... B-but it was only a little bit!" Twilight said defensively and stood back, while Spike stared at her dumbfounded. "I know it doesn't seem likely, but it's the truth... I swear on my apprenticeship to Princess Celestia." she said shyly to the little dragon, staring at her confusedly. "No seriously, what's in the bag." Spike didn't believe her story, which made her roll her eyes and take the alcohol from the bag. Spikes was shocked that Twilight the one who said ‘alcohol is bad’ and kills brain cells, and that she would never, ever consume it willingly, was actually saying that she not only liked it, she would drink it with any chance she could get! "Twilight, since when did you resort to drinking?" he inquired with pure shock in his voice. Twilight chuckled nervously, "Just today actually, I got myself some spiked apple cider at the liquor store just a while ago. It's pretty good, but extremely strong, I don't know if I could drink a whole can by myself." She then turned to the sweets, " Oh yeah, I got some sweets too, just some comfort food really..." She took one of the cans of cider and opened it, as Spike watched her to see if she would back down or not. She didn't, gulping down the strong cider, and eating cupcakes, it was like a bad horror movie where the ponies eat and drink and a killer comes out of the randomest place and kills them all, but the likelihood of that happening is close to none in this case. Spike didn't believe it, Twilight was actually drinking! And she was gulping down the liquid without even batting a single eyebrow. Though he was saddened that she chose such an addicting thing, he was happy she'd finally started to liven up a bit. He decided to join her, substituting the alcohol with a bottle of root beer that he liked so much. Both of them were devouring the sweet cupcakes, but then Twilight turned to the cake. She'd forgotten all about it, she didn't want to waste it, so she stood up and grabbed two plates, two forks and a knife and started to set the plates in front of her and Spike. Twilight cut the cake into equal slices, an amazing feat since she had already gone through, half of the six pack of cider. Twilight added gems to Spike's piece, even when drunk out of her mind she knew what Spike liked, and he didn’t spend a single second before burying his face in the slice of cake, devouring it and the gems upon it. They talked for a while, eating the cake until Spike has decided it was about time he went to bed. Twilight looked around, her and Spike had appeared to have eaten all of the cake, and all of the cupcakes. Twilight was amazed, never thinking she could eat so much. Not only that, but twilight noticed she had drank every last bit of the spiked cider, bottles and cans! She was swaying side to side, hiccupping, "Maybe *hiccup* I should *hiccup* go to bed now..." she said. She spotted the small bottle of whiskey, and asked herself why not? She gulped down the strong liquor and clumsily stumbled up the stairs and laid down in her bed, her thoughts were numbed, the emotional pain, gone just like that, and that brought a smile to her face. She felt warm and tingly, and her mind was completely and utterly dumbed, and she loved that, now her thoughts were at bay, and she was in a state of peace. She drifted off to sleep piss drunk, or more so passed out in her bed. Her day had worked out pretty nicely in her opinion... But that would be more than she could say about what the morning might bring her...