//------------------------------// // Step Eight: A Big Flourish // Story: First Steps // by Steel Resolve //------------------------------// Inch by inch, Fluttershy’s wide eyes rose to peek over the tabletop. She’d slouched lower and lower into her chair as the story had progressed, hiding as best she could from the terrible date while still being trapped across the table from her house guest. In the date’s darkest moments, only the top of her quivering scalp could be seen. Now that Pinkie had finally finished, Fluttershy risked direct eye contact once more. “Um, well, it wasn’t so bad, Pinkie.” “What?” Pinkie half-rose from her chair to lean over the table, and Fluttershy retreated again. “C’mon, Flutters! It was a disaster!” “But… okay, it was pretty bad, but it all came out alright in the end, didn’t it?” Fluttershy took a deep breath, then forced herself to climb back into her chair and sit up straight again. “At least you finally got to go on that Cadence ride like you wanted.” She gave Pinkie a weak smile. “Was it nice?” “I dunno.” Fluttershy sat blinking for a moment. “But… but you did ride it, didn’t you?” Pinkie flushed, but broke out into a wide grin. “Um, yeah. We rode it, but I didn’t get to see too much. We were kinda busy. I made her go on it like five times.” It was Fluttershy’s turn to blush. Fanning her flaming cheeks with her napkin, she dropped her gaze to her bowl of soup, or what was left of it. Somehow, during the story’s telling, she’d eaten nearly every last drop of the strange concoction. “Pinkie, when—” “You were hungry!” Pinkie replied, giggling behind a hoof. “I actually refilled your bowl twice.” “I, um… I eat when I’m nervous.” Pinkie leaned to the side, squinting at Fluttershy’s barrel. “Uh, how does that work? You’re always nervous, but you’re in really good shape!” Pinkie pinched a roll near her flank, then frowned at it. “Better than me, anyway. How do you do it?” “I also pace a lot when I’m nervous. Sometimes I pace for miles.” Fluttershy frowned and set her hooves on her hips. “But I’m not always nervous!” “Uh, yeah you are,” Pinkie said as she licked the last of the peach soup off of her spoon. “It’s kinda your thing.” “It’s one of my things, and you girls just see it a lot because we’re always fighting some big, scary monster or running off to some royal function full of really important dignitaries that all want to talk to us! Everypony sees me at my worst!” Fluttershy started, then dropped her gaze into her lap. “Oh, Pinkie! I’m so sorry for shouting. I… I just…” “Nonono!” Pinkie hopped off her her chair and trotted around the table. Throwing her hooves around her friend, Pinkie gently rocked Fluttershy. “I didn’t say it right. You get scared of stuff, but that’s okay. It’s part of what makes you, you.” Fluttershy wrapped a hoof around Pinkie and rested her head against her friend’s. “I just wish sometimes that I could be around everypony when they could see the real me. Not the big scaredy-cat everypony thinks I am, but somepony who helps. Somepony who tries.” Turning, she pushed her burning face into Pinkie’s soft, poofy mane. “But I can’t even face my supposed best friend when she needs me, so what good am I?” Pinkie continued to rock Fluttershy as the pegasus cried. “But that’s what I’m trying to tell you, Flutters! Look at all the bad things I did on my very first date with Rarity, but she still stuck right by me! Yeah, she was upset about stuff for a little while, but I totally messed it all up and she didn’t send me away forever.” “But the letters!” Fluttershy pulled her head out of Pinkie’s mane to stare into her eyes. “She yelled at me, Pinkie. She didn’t even yell at you!” Pinkie’s lower lip quivered. “Yeah, she did. She just didn’t do it with her mouth. She yelled at me with her hooves when she ran away and hid. I think it was just too big a thing for her to talk about right then. I speak Hoof, though, or at least I did that day, ’cause I knew just what they were saying. She was super-duper upset, and all she wanted to do was to get away from everything that had done it to her.” Pinkie placed a trembling hoof over her heart. “And I was the pony who was the responsiblest. Going to the park. Eating the Matrimonial. Riding the Powerdive. All of those things were my ideas. She didn’t want to do them, but she did to be nice. And that’s how I repaid her.” The room fell silent for several long moments as Pinkie and Fluttershy held each other. Finally, Pinkie wiped at her eyes, then held Fluttershy out at leg’s length. “But she forgave me, and she’ll forgive you, too. I know she was yelly, but that’s only because all the hurt confused her tongue. She pushes things way down deep into this special box inside of her if she thinks talking about it is going to be rude or unfriendly somehow, but when she’s stuffed too many hurts into that place, it blows up. She hates it, but she can’t help it, any more than you can help feeling scared. You’re both the same. You guys want to talk, but you’re more afraid of yourselves and what you’ll do than you are of the other pony. If you never talk, then you’ll both be sad forever, and then I’ll be crying forever. Do you know how hard it is to blow up balloons when you’re crying? Really hard, and my eyes will probably get really tired.” Pinkie pointed a hoof to her bloodshot eye. “I hope you two talk soon, ’cause my peepers are already pooped.” “I… I…” Fluttershy’s grip on Pinkie’s leg tightened. “I want to, but…” Patting Fluttershy on the head, Pinkie gave her friend a shaky grin. “That’s the best part! I’ve got it all worked out. We’ll have—” “A party?” Fluttershy responded automatically. Pinkie’s eyes widened. “Hey, yeah! That’s just what I was going to say!” She rubbed her chin and eyed Fluttershy. “Are you sure you don’t have any party pony blood in your family?” “I don’t think so, Pinkie,” Fluttershy said, rolling her eyes with a small grin. “It’s just, well, that’s just your thing.” “Hey, I do more than throw parties! I—” Pinkie’s jaw snapped shut and she nodded. “Okay, I deserved that one. Sometimes my mouth just goes ahead and buys the balloons when my brain is still looking at the party supply catalogue. Sorry, Flutters.” “It’s okay, I know you didn’t mean anything by it.” Fluttershy disentangled herself from Pinkie, then scooped up the bowls. Trotting to the sink, she set the bowls inside and pulled out a sponge. “I appreciate it, Pinkie, but I don’t know if a party is going to help. They’re… well, they’re always so loud, and there’s so many other ponies around. What if Rarity makes a big scene, or if I end up hiding in a closet all night?” Pinkie hopped back and forth, her grin widening. “But that’s the good part! It’d be a masquerade party. Nopony would know who was who except for you and Rarity! I thought you could dress up as her and she could dress up as you!” Filling the sink with warm, soapy water, Fluttershy frowned at the dishes she ran beneath the faucet’s stream. “Why would we do that?” “Think about it, Shy! Then you’d know for sure who each other are, so you can talk to them or avoid them, whichever you wanted right then. You could cut your Making Up Cake into little, tiny pieces or eat it all in one big bite. Whichever you wanted!” Pinkie leaned forward on her hooves, her eyes sparkling. “Aaaaaaand I thought it’d help you two see things from the other’s point of view. I mean, if your dressed up as Rarity, that’s kinda like being Rarity. You can look at yourself in the mirror and think of all the things that Rarity might think and say, and—” “No.” “And you’ll probably—huh?” With a sigh, Fluttershy dropped the sponge into the water, then turned to face Pinkie. “I don’t want to do that.” Pinkie’s smile retreated a little, and she took a small step backwards. “I… I just thought…” “I know you did.” Fluttershy offered Pinkie a brief smile before propping her foreknee on the countertop and resting her chin on her hoof. Her eyes drifted to the window. The birds outside were swooping to pick insects out of the air. Even in the growing darkness they seemed so sure of the proper course, like they always knew exactly what to do. “Just like I thought it would be best to tell her what she wanted to hear, because I didn’t know what else to do. But not everything can be solved with parties or trying to be nice when you should be honest.” Pinkie picked at the hemmed edge of the checkered tablecloth. “But… but then what—” “I don’t know, Pinkie,” Fluttershy said, turning from the scene outside with what seemed like great difficulty. “I’m afraid, and I don’t know what to do. What do you do when you can’t trust yourself? Hiding feels right, but I know that it isn’t. Facing Rarity is right, but it doesn’t feel that way. It’s going to be scary and awful.” Pinkie tilted her head to the side, her eyes wide. “But you already faced her, and it was already scary and awful. I mean, how much more awful can it get? Everything went wrong!” Pinkie threw her hooves wide. “Just like on our date! Kablowee! Everything blew up in our faces like a balloon you blow into too hard because you spent too much time licking the icing bowl instead of decorating and now you’re in a big hurrybecausetheguestsaregonnabehereanyminute!” Pinkie whipped out a paper bag and stuck her muzzle into it. As the bag expanded and contracted rapidly, the pulsing vein that ran down the side of her forehead subsided a little. “What… what were we talking about? Oh, right! Big blowups!” Pinkie’s ears perked up and she yanked her face out of the bag. Crushing the end closed with her right hoof, she slammed her left into the inflated bag, which burst with a loud pop. “Sure, they’re loud and scary for a bit, but you’ve already been through that, so the worst is behind you.” Fluttershy shook her head. “No. Not really. The worst is still in front of us.” Glancing at the window and the open sky beyond it, Fluttershy’s wings twitched. “Or… or rather, it’s between us, keeping us apart. It’s when she feels bad for being angry at me, and then gets even more angry at herself for feeling that way. All because of something I did.” “She...” Pinkie looked away, her brow wrinkling. “Yeah, she does that. Like... a lot.” “She does, and that hurts worst of all. I hate thinking that I’ve disappointed her, but then to know that she blames herself for my actions—” “Hey now! Just hold on a minute! She doesn’t—” When Pinkie’s mouth closed with a snap, her eyebrow shot up as if on springs to bounce alarmingly high over her forehead. “Okay, wow. Yeah, she does that too, but.. but that’s just Rares, I guess. She can’t help who she is.” “That doesn’t mean I feel any better about making her go through that. I messed up, Pinkie. I wanted so badly to help her, and... then it got so out of hoof.” “Well, yeah, but you didn’t mean for it to happen! You just—” “Lied? Panicked? Lied some more?” Fluttershy began to hyperventilate, and her eyes twitched as if searching for an exit. “Stopped responding even though I knew she was freaking out? Hid under my bed like a scaredy-pony?” “Well...” Sweat beaded on Pinkie’s brow when she held up a hoof. “Just a sec, Shy.” She yanked her saddlebag out from under the kitchen table and rifled through it for a moment. “Hmmm. Where is that thing? Rarity said it looked so good on the mayor—ah hah!” Pinkie triumphantly held a cravat over her head before slipping it on. Turning to face Fluttershy once more, she yanked at the collar and perspired more heavily. “Um, okay, so those letters… They might seem bad in a certain light, but, um… Well, there’s lot of different kinds of lights. Whole stores full of them, so Rarity probably just had the wrong lamp…” Pinkie swallowed, not quite meeting Fluttershy’s eyes. “So… so maybe—” “Pinkie, we both know that no light in all of Equestria would make those letters any less terrible.” Fluttershy nodded brusquely. “I appreciate you trying to make me feel better. I really do, but... what I did was not something that somepony will just fix for her with a little facepaint and a new t-shirt.” Pinkie pursed her lips for a moment, her brow furrowing. “You’ve got her all wrong, Shy. I mean, yeah, she felt better after they fixed the pictures, but she... she forgave me. For everything! And she did it even before we knew about the re-shoot. She never even thought any of it was my fault even though it totally was!” She pointed at Fluttershy, adding: “Just like she never blamed you for the letters. She blamed herself for all of it. The only reason she was even kinda madish at you was because you didn’t come to see her afterwards. She thought you’d abandoned her.” “That’s because I did,” Fluttershy said sadly. “When she needed me, I couldn’t... I just couldn’t.” “But you can now!” Pinkie gave Fluttershy a few encouraging pats on her shoulder. “Now that you know how she really feels!” “You mean how she’s incredibly disgusted with me because of what I was going to do? I really don’t see how that helps.” Pinkie took Fluttershy’s head in her hooves and gently twisted it sideways. “You’re just looking at things all weird. Try it like this.” Trotting over to stand next to Fluttershy, Pinkie tilted her head at the same angle. “Huh. Okay, maybe not. That just makes my tummy feel seasick.” Pinkie shook her head briskly. “But Rarity’s… um… complicated.” She tapped her hoof on her chin. “I don’t know how to say it right. I guess she’s like a layer cake. Sometimes you look at it, and the outside is chocolate, and you think to yourself ‘Oh, chocolate cake! I love that!’, but then you cut into it, and the inside is vanilla marble! Then you think ‘Oh, look! It’s a vanilla marble cake with chocolate frosting! I love that!’ Then you pull the slice out and you notice that the icing between the layers is actually raspberry, and you think ‘Oh! It’s a vanilla marble and raspberry cake with chocolate frosting! I love that!’, but you wouldn’t know until you cut into it and looked. I mean, unless you baked it, but you don’t bake Rarity. The closest she gets is that really hot room in the spa. So see? It’s like that.” A shadow of worry crossed Pinkie’s face for a moment. “But, um… don’t actually cut into Rarity, alright?” Fluttershy just sighed, laying her head down on the table. “It’s okay, Pinkie. It’s getting late, I think you should go home and get some rest. It was a good try.” Pinkie’s ears drooped as her eyes fell to her hooves. “Sorry. I’m just not as good with advice as Rarity is. She’d know just what to say if she was here and it was me you were afraid to talk to.” Sighing, Pinkie fished her saddlebag out from under the table, then paused. Frowning, she squatted down and stared at the shimmering trail her packs had left on the floor. “Do you have a dustpan? Looks like I’m leaking glitter. Again!” “In the pantry.” Fluttershy replied without looking up. After a moment, she stood, looking towards the stairs. “I’m sorry, Pinkie. Would it be okay if I asked you to see yourself out? I think I’d like to get some rest.” “Nf Gmrmrfpf!” Pinkie said from around the dustpan’s handle. “R Glrffrm mmft!” Dropping a wink, she turned back to the small, stubborn patch of glitter and set to work. ~~~ Fluttershy nodded absently, plodding towards the stairs. It was so nice of Pinkie to come over and try to help out, but she was just so… so Pinkie Pie. Fluttershy loved her friend dearly, but having a discussion with her was always so exhausting. Pinkie just never seemed to run out of energy. I wish I could be like that. So eager for everything Equestria has to offer, but— Fluttershy pulled up short, then pressed her ear to the front door. “—just fine, Applejack. No need to fret.” “Yeah, whatever you say. Just keep a hoof around my barrel so you don’t fall on your face again.” “What are you implying, exactly?” “That you’re a lousy drunk.” “Well! I never! I am not ‘lousy’! I’ll have you know I groom to within an inch of my life and a louse would never dare—” “I just mean you can’t hold your liquor all that well, sugarcube. No need to take offense.” Fluttershy’s eyes widened, and she stood frozen for just a moment before bolting for her stairs. Trembling, she crouched and hid herself behind the railing. “Well... I... I suppose I may have over-indulged.” Rarity’s voice was coming closer to the cottage, and Fluttershy continued to sink toward the floor, wishing she’d hid under her bed. “But I still wish it to be noted that my grooming is impeccable.” “Yeah, yeah, duly noted.” Applejack said with a laugh. “Hey girls,” she called into the cottage. “You decent? I finally dragged ‘Little Miss Hothead’ outta that bar. We came to check on y’all and fetch Pinkie.” “I... I am not a hothead! I was simply tested beyond my measure... and I failed miserably. Goddesses, why am I so pathetic?” “Grrmmflff! I mean, hi—” Fluttershy jumped at the sound of her small metal dustpan hitting the kitchen’s tiled floor. It was immediately followed by a fit of coughing and finally a groan. “Oh no! The glitter! Uh, we’re in here, Applejack!” Pinkie called back. “Well, I am, I mean. Fluttershy went upstairs to sleep. I hope she doesn’t have any louses in her bed! Those don’t sound fun at all, but maybe even louses are nice to Flutters. They’d probably only bite her a teeny-tiny bit.” Fluttershy could hear Rarity’s fond chuckle as she entered the cottage, and while it was nice to know that Rarity was not in a bad mood right now, she didn’t feel very confident that things wouldn’t sour if she went down there to join them. “Ah, the poor dear must be exhausted emotionally.” Rarity said, letting out a groan as the chair creaked, making Fluttershy jump anew. “Let me... just sit here a while until the room stops spinning, Pinkie. Then we’ll go home.” “Sure thing! I’ve, uh, well, I sort of need to sweep this kitchen again, anyway. I mean, unless Fluttershy wants sparkle toast for breakfast with sparklelade jam and a big glass of sparklemilk.” A pause. “Rarity, does Fluttershy like sparkle toast? I mean, it sounds pretty good now that I’m thinking about it, and her kitchen’s all shimmery. Maybe I should just leave it!” Clomping hoofsteps with a chuckle. “Somethin’ tells me that ain’t such a great idea. Glitter’s great and all, but maybe not exactly what Fluttershy wants to jump right out at her first thing in the mornin’. Fun as it is, most of us ain’t got the glitter tolerance you’ve got, ’specially in our milk. Where’s your—Whoa, Nelly!” Fluttershy winced as Applejack’s hooves scrambled over her kitchen tile. “Pinkie, how much glitter were you carryin’ around?” “Ummmmmm…” Fluttershy caught a loud swallow. “Well, I just got two new fifty pound bags. Two! And I just happen to have two compartments in my saddlebags, so it’s perfect! Or, it is when they don’t leak. Like, a lot.” “Rarity, you like sparkly stuff. You’re really missing out!” Applejack’s voice sounded muffled, as though her hoof was pressed firmly over her mouth. Fluttershy risked moving down a step, but try as she might, she still couldn’t quite see into the kitchen. The angle was all wrong, but she did catch the edge of Rarity’s hoof. Her heartbeat quickening, she climbed back to the top of the stairs and prayed that she hadn’t made any noise. “I keep trying to sweep it up, but—Oh no! Now the other one is leaking! That’s the last time I buy glitter from Faulty Packaging Industries, no matter how cute the little dog on their coupon is!” Fluttershy’s ears perked up. She did love cute dogs. “I mean, just look at this puppy, AJ!” “I’ll be. That is one cute puppy!” “See? How can you resist that face? It’s just screaming ‘Buy a hundred pounds of glitter! One hundred pounds equals two extended tummy rub sessions! You don’t want me to go without tummy rubs, do you?’” “Uh, Pinkie—” “I tried to hold out, but then I was up all night, just worrying about those tummy rubs! I was going to just go with the ten pound bag, but then I thought it might just get a head pat, and what if that’s not enough for a little doggie? What if he’s cold and alone and has a totally rubless belly? What if he turns to a life of crime because of his deprived puppyhood?” “Pinkie—” “I couldn’t let that happen, so a hundred pounds it was, but who knew that Faulty Packaging Industries would have such faulty packaging? I just hope those belly rubs were worth it, Super Cute Puppy! You’d better study hard in school and get that medical degree! You’d better—” “PINKIE PIE!” Pinkie’s hooves slid to a stop. “Uh, yeah, AJ?” “Fascinatin’ as this all is, let’s put our backs into gettin’ this kitchen cleaned up for Fluttershy. You can tell me all about that puppy’s future in the medical profession somewhere down the road.” “Okie-dokie-loki!” Fluttershy’s hoof wandered to the lower step. More than anything, she wished that she could be in the kitchen. She wanted to give Pinkie a hug for caring about the little doggie so much, and she wanted to thank Applejack for being concerned about her reaction to the kitchen. She just wished she could live up to their example. The two ponies in Fluttershy’s kitchen fell silent, though the sounds of sweeping and hooves traveling back and forth across a tiled floor filtered through the darkened living room and up through the stairwell. Eventually, Fluttershy’s legs began to cramp and she risked a glance through the rail to the cuckoo clock on her living room wall. Goodness! They’ve been at it for nearly forty-five minutes! Oh, Fluttershy. Some friend you are. You go to that kitchen this instant and— “Whew! I think that’s got it, Pinkie.” “Okay, let me just check the fridge.” “Sure thing, Pink—wait, what about the fridge?” “Well, she can’t have any sparklemilk if I don’t pour some in the jug and stir it up.” “Pinkie, why don’t we wait and ask Fluttershy tomorrow if she wants some sparklemilk? Like I said, that’s the kind of thing that you don’t want jumpin’ right out at you first thing in the mornin’ when you’re not ready for it.” A hoof tapped on the tile. “Okay, I guess. But I think you guys are missing out.” “What I’m missin’ out on is my bedtime.” Applejack’s heavy hooffalls rang out as she crossed back into the living room. “Hey, Rarity. You ready to—awwww!” “She’s all sleepy, AJ.” “Told her she couldn’t hold her liquor,” Applejack said, chuckling. “What?” Pinkie’s tail poked into view for a moment as it stiffened. “She couldn’t hold it? How many drinks were you two drinking at a time? I’ve seen her use her magic to hold like a hundred ribbons and buttons and stuff all at once!” “Pinkie, remind me to sit you all down at some point and go over the finer points of bar slang. You girls are a bit behind the curve. Actually, Twilight’s not just behind the curve. She ain’t even in the same general geographical location of it.” “I don’t know. Twilight seems pretty up on curves to me. Why, just the other day, she was saying that you were curvy in all the right places, especially when you had on some of the things that Rainbow apparently bought you for your birth—” “Pinkie, let’s get Rarity up and out of here!” Applejack said in a breathless rush. “We could maybe stuff her into one of my bags. She’ll have glitter-butt, but she likes sparkly things.” “Just put her across my back, Pinkie. Something tells me Rarity’ll wake up fit to be tied if she’s half covered in glitter.” “Um.” Fluttershy clamped both hooves over her mouth in surprise. She hadn’t meant to say anything, but she wasn’t sure if draping Rarity over Applejack like a bag of meal was very wise. Having said something, however, she couldn’t very well pretend to be sleeping any longer. “Well, hey, Fluttershy!” Applejack tipped her hat back to get a better look at her friend on the stairs. “Sorry, did Pinkie and I wake you? We were tryin’ to be quiet. We’ll be outta your mane in two shakes just as soon as we get Rarity outta here.” “That’s... that’s okay. I think maybe it might be better if you let her just sleep? It just doesn’t sound very nice carrying her back like that...” she trailed off, unsure. “I told you the saddlebags were the way to go, AJ!” Pinkie leaned around to open the left compartment. Catching the light, the glitter coating the inside shown like a miniature sun. “One glitter-butt later and our princess will be safely tucked into bed.” Applejack’s eyes cut sideways, and her mouth twitched as if it was unsure whether it ought to be grinning or frowning. “Pinkie, you’d be hard pressed to get Winona in that thing. How exactly are you plannin’ to stuff Rarity in there?” “Well, we’d just… just...” As Pinkie stared into the pack, her eyes dilated, and a line of drool trailed out of the side of her mouth. “Pinkie!” Applejack waved a hoof in front of Pinkie’s eyes, then knocked the saddlebag’s cover closed. She rolled her eyes as Pinkie rubbed her eyes and blinked. “I think Fluttershy’s got the right of it. Probably for the best if Rarity just sleeps it off.” Squinting up at the staircase, Applejack caught Fluttershy’s eye. “She’ll probably feel a little rough in the mornin’, though. Might need a little hair of the dog when she wakes up. If you’ve got any, that is.” “I... I’ll go check the kennel, but I don’t see how dog hair is going to help her,” Fluttershy replied. Applejack squeezed her eyes closed for a moment, grimacing. “No, I mean—nevermind. I’ll just add you to the list. It’s like you girls’ve never had a drink in your lives.” Pinkie arched an eyebrow and tilted her head to the side. “She needs dog hair because she’s feeling ruff? Did you girls break into Zecora’s transformation potions again?” “What do you mean, ‘us girls?’” Applejack’s eyes narrowed. “It was you and Rainbow that drank them potions.” “Ooooooooh, right. I forgot!” Pinkie’s ears perked up. “That was the best day I’ve ever spent as an owl-ocelot-otter, or as I like to call it, an owlcelotter!” “If you two were tryin’ to be make yourselves turn into dragons, why did you drink all the O’s?” “Rainbow wanted to be an Awesome Dragon!” Applejack stared at Pinkie for a moment. “But ‘Awesome’ ain’t spelled with an O,” she finally said. “I know that, but would Rainbow listen? Nooooooooo.” Rolling her eyes, Applejack put one hoof on Pinkie’s rump and pushed her toward the front door. “Sorry for keepin’ you up, Fluttershy. You sure you’ll be alright with Rarity here? It won’t be no trouble at all to lug her on home.” “I’m sure she’ll be fine,” Fluttershy said firmly. As nervous as she was about another blowout with Rarity, she was still a friend, and she knew Rarity well enough to know that she’d be horrified at the idea of being carried home like a sack of grain. ”You two should go get some rest. Pinkie can come pick her up in the morning.” When the two of them had finally gone, Fluttershy took a moment to examine her kitchen, and while there were still specks of sparkliness here and there, the vast majority had been swept up. She nevertheless grabbed a broom to get the remainder, as her mousy friends might try to eat it otherwise, and she wasn’t sure it was good for them. Fluttershy started when Rarity mumbled something incoherent. Poking her head around the door jamb, she could see that Rarity had curled up into a tight ball on the couch and was shivering despite the cozy warmth of the cottage. She needs a quilt or she’ll catch cold, she thought, hesitating despite seeing the need. She chided herself for it, and hurriedly went to the linen closet for one of her many hoof-stitched quilts. Fluttershy, why are you always such a feather-brain? You know how drafty that window is… She frowned down at her hooves. They were shaking slightly as she tried to work the closet’s latch. Closing her eyes for a moment, she took a deep breath, then glanced back over toward the couch. Rarity’s soft, silky hair had fallen over her eyes. The tip of her nose just poked through, and Fluttershy wondered if Rarity knew it wiggled when she snored. So many little things about her. About all of them. I wonder if any of us really know how special we are to each other? With a sigh, she turned back to the closet and dug out her warmest quilt. Her mother had made it when Fluttershy moved into the cottage. They’d joked about how it was a literal housewarming gift. Gathering it up, she brought it back to the couch. “Okay, you’ll feel a lot better with this around you,” Fluttershy whispered as she unfolded the quilt. “You know, you probably shouldn’t drink so much. It makes you lose your body’s natural warmth. But maybe you wouldn’t drink too much if you had better friends who knew how to take care of you instead of being selfish.” Fluttershy spread the blanket, then carefully tucked it in and around her sleeping friend. “I wish I could tell you that I’ll be better, but we both know I can’t be, so I won’t. I’ll be leaving early to feed the birds, but I’ll leave you some fresh oat and barley cakes on the table.” Though whispering, her voice still cracked on the last syllable. Her lower lip trembled. “I’m sorry, Rarity. You deserve to have a best friend who isn’t too scared to do what’s right, but you don’t have one. Or maybe you do, now that you have Pinkie. She’s strong, so maybe you don’t need me anymore, if you ever did. You’re better off now. I hope you have sweet dreams.” Blinking back tears, Fluttershy turned back to the kitchen. “At least let me clean the rest of this glitter up so that you can have a nice breakfast. I can do that much, at least.” ~~~ Pinkie bounced to one side of Applejack, then leapt over her to land on the other side again. With each landing, a small explosion of glitter poofed out of her saddlebags and into the crisp night air. “Pinkie, I’m glad you’re feelin’ your oats, but would you mind tonin’ it down a bit. You’re makin’ me dizzy.” Applejack scowled up at Pinkie as her friend’s rear hoof caught her hat and knocked it askew. “Ponies weren’t built to jump all the time. You’re gonna hurt your knees… and my noggin.” Landing with another glittery explosion, Pinkie bolted ahead a few feet, then whirled. “So I’ve been thinking—” “Sounds like dangerous business,” Applejack muttered. “— Now that we’re unofficially officially family…” Pinkie’s grin widened. “Uh, yeah?” Applejack mentally upgraded the small trickle of apprehension that generally started to flow in Applejack’s heart to a healthy creek. “I-I mean, sure, it’s not totally confirmed, but, uh—” Pinkie leapt forward and grabbed Applejack’s head. Now nose to nose, Pinkie’s eyes dilated. “I thought you guys could finally show me the Family Tree!” “You’re squooshin’ my cheeks up.” Applejack pried away Pinkie’s hooves. “And you already saw that back at Goldie’s place, remember?” Pinkie rolled her eyes. “No, silly. The tree!” “Come again?” Applejack said, scratching behind her ear. “Oh, come on. Your Family Tree!” Pinkie frowned at Applejack’s blank stare. “You got to see our Family Rock. I want to see your Family Tree! It’s probably a thousand feet tall, and it has apples the size of wagons! No! Houses! House-apples that you could carve out and live in. Then when you get hungry in the middle of the night, you could just roll over and take a few nibbles of a wall and go right back to sleep!” Staring down at the road, Applejack took strength in the plain solidity of the thing. Though natural, the dirt and rocks had a regular, calming quality that any of the decidedly unnatural conversations that she had with Pinkie Pie seemed to lack. “Pinkie, we don’t actually have a tree. It’s just a book with a bunch of names in it.” Pinkie’s grin collapsed. “No way. For really?” “For really.” “Is this some kind of Apple secret?” Pinkie said, squinting back at Applejack. “’Cause I’ll totally memorize the secret hoofshake or whatever it is you guys do.” Applejack squeezed her eyes tightly closed for a moment, gritting her teeth. “I’m tellin’ you, Pinkie, there ain’t no actual tree.” “But that doesn’t make any sense!” Pinkie rose onto her hind hooves and threw her forehooves wide beside her. “We have a rock farm, so there’s a family rock. Are you trying to tell me that in all of the trees on Sweet Apple Acres, there’s not one that’s the Family Tree?” Squinting at the horizon, Ponyville seemed a long ways away still. A disturbing, conversation-filled long ways away. “I, uh… I guess they’re all Family Trees, Pinkie. We planted them and take care of them, just like you folks do with your rocks… I guess.” “You can’t just cheat and call them all your Family Trees!” Pinkie set her hooves on her hips, which caused another small burst of glitter to shoot out into the moonlight. A small, vertical crease formed between Applejack’s eyebrows. “It ain’t cheatin’. It’s just a different way of lookin’ at things. We can’t take special care of any one tree. We gotta treat ’em all the same so that they produce an even harvest. Can’t sell a basket of huge apples to one customer and then itty-bitty apples to another. Ponies got a right to expect a particular thing when they come to our produce stand.” Pinkie dropped back down to four hooves, and she looked away. “I-I know that, AJ. When ponies come to our rock stalls, they’re looking for the same things: Flavor. Texture. Aroma. Rock farming isn’t all that different, really.” A silence stretched out between them. “Uh…” Applejack finally said. “But that doesn’t mean you can’t give a little more to the family!” Pinkie nudged Applejack in the side with her foreknee. “We don’t harvest the Family Rock. It’s part of us. We meet around it when important stuff comes up. We celebrate holidays with it. We talk to it when we get lonely or scared.” “Y’all’re talkin’ to rocks?” Pinkie’s eyes sparkled. “Well, sure! Where do you think all my great ideas come from?” Applejack stared back down at the comforting regularity of the road. “You know what, Pinkie? I ain’t surprised in the least.” She jumped when Pinkie leapt high overhead. From somewhere unseen, fireworks erupted. “Ooh, ooh! AJ, I just had the best idea, and I didn’t even have to talk to a rock to get it!” “I have the feelin’ that I’m gonna regret this, but what?” Pinkie’s mane and tail stood on end, and small sparks of excited electricity jumped from them. “We can go to Sweet Apple Acres and pick your Family Tree!” “It’s kinda late, Pinkie,” Applejack replied, pointing up at the dark night sky. “And that’s the perfect time!” Pinkie’s white teeth gleamed in the moonlight. “The trees will be all sleepy, so we can get to see the real them! No putting on airs or showboating. Just trees being leafy and apple-y and barky.” She paused for a moment, rubbing her chin. “Winona’s gonna be asleep, too, right? Wouldn’t want to get the barks confused.” Applejack rolled her eyes. “I’m sure Winona’s asleep, and that puts her one step ahead of us. We better get along.” Snapping to attention, Pinkie pivoted smartly toward Sweet Apple Acres. “Right. We need to get along to see which trees you get along with the best! As an unofficial official Apple, I solemnly swear that I won’t leaf your side until I get to the root of this No Family Tree issue.” From somewhere that Applejack couldn’t quite detect, a fife and drum started to play a vigorous marching song. “We’ll risk life and tree limb while we search from seed to shining seed!” Applejack groaned and rubbed the side of her face. Between half-dragging Rarity to Fluttershy’s cottage and now this, it’d been a long night. “Pinkie, I appreciate the enthusiasm, but I think this is the sort of thing that we gotta have a family meetin’ about. Sounds like Family Trees are a big deal. We can’t just force that kinda thing on ponies.” “Oh, yeah.” Pinkie froze in mid marching step. Slowly she sank down to her haunches. “I guess you’re right.” “Sure I am,” Applejack replied with a yawn. “Granny Smith’s gonna have all kinds of insight about stuff we ain’t even thought of, and Big Mac’ll say ‘Yup’ a lot. You need that kinda input before you make big decisions. Plus, Apple Bloom ain’t even up to talk about it.” Applejack squinted off toward the horizon. “At least, she’d better not be, or Mac’ll have somethin’ other than pickin’ a tree to worry about.” “Aww…” Pinkie’s ears drooped, and she dropped her gaze to her hooves.. “Tree picking was going to be super fun, though.” “Buck up, Pinkie,” Applejack said, hooking a hoof around her friend’s barrel. With a grunt, she hauled Pinkie up to her hooves again. “We can talk about it again when it ain’t so late and home’s not so far away. For now, we’d better get steppin’ or we’ll be out here ’til dawn.” She snapped her jaw closed, but it was too late. The words were out. “But if it’s dawn, we can talk to the family ’cause they’ll all be up then!” Pinkie’s eyes sparkled, and her voice took on an unsettling vibrato quality has so bounced rapidly in place. “And that’ll be perfect! Everypony will be totally rested up and we can talk about trees, and walk around trees, and stalk the trees, and flock to the—” “There’s just one problem with your plan, Pinkie.” Pinkie pulled up short. “Huh? What’s that?” “The one where you and I will be fallin’ over tired ’cause we ain’t slept for a day.” Applejack didn’t quite stifle another yawn behind her hoof. “And I don’t know about you, but I’m bushed.” “Bushes?” Pinkie cocked her head to the side. “Applejack, we’re talking about trees here. You really must be tired.” Applejack opened her mouth several times before deciding that it just wasn’t worth it. “Yeah, I am, so let’s just get home and figure this all out tomorrow. Preferably after sleepin’ in.” Rubbing her eyes, Pinkie let out a yawn of her own. “I guess you’re right. My head wants to pick out trees, but my eyes keep drooping, and now my mouth is yawny. Sleep probably is the best thing, huh?” “I guarantee it, Pinkie.” Applejack breathed a mental sigh or relief. The last thing she needed was to be doing some crazy tree inspection in the middle of the night. With any luck, Pinkie would forget all about this silliness by the morning. “So let’s get you back to Sugarcube Corner, so I can—” “Sugarcube Corner? No way, silly billy—” “Alright, fine then. The carousel,” Applejack smirked at Pinkie. “Got used to sleepin’ in different places, huh?” “What? No.” Pinkie cocked an eyebrow at Applejack before realization hit her. “Oh! I mean, yes! Err… sometimes! Not enough!” Applejack’s grin widened. “You go get ’em, tiger! If I’m readin’ Rarity right, there ain’t gonna be much sleep goin’ on pretty soon.” “Ummm… Well, maybe,” Pinkie replied with a deep blush, “but that’s not what I’m talking about. We gotta go to the farm!” “You see, the thing with Rarity is you gotta—wait. What? The farm?” “Well, yeah!” Pinkie’s face lit up again. “How else am I going to go over my trained gopher plan with you?” Digging into her mane, Pinkie pulled out a large schematic blueprint and unrolled it for them both to read. “You see, it all starts with the Rodent Agricultural Training Symposium. I know that spells R.A.T.S., but we’ll be doing gophers. Hopefully they’ll be on board. I’ve drawn up plans for a twenty building campus, and also this cute daisy in a field off in the corner of this sheet. I ran out of green. That’s why some of the grass is red. Anyway, once the gophers all get their degrees, we can have them manage the fields. With the right sales pitch, I think they’ll go-fer it. Then you can just kick your hooves up after that!” Pinkie flipped rapidly through the giant sheets of paper. “So here on page eighty-five, you can see…” Applejack groaned and pulled her hat down over her eyes. This was going to be a long, long walk. ~~~ Rarity’s lips smacked loudly as she snuggled into the covers. Her eyes flickered, glancing upwards at the unexpected wood paneled ceiling. Under her back, instead of the luxurious downiness of her bed, she felt instead a firm but soft surface of a couch of some sort. Perhaps she’d passed out on the chaise lounge again? It would hardly be the first time. Her mind puzzled at her surroundings, thoughts coming sluggishly. Her first conclusion was that she was clearly drunk. The fact that it had taken so long to decide that of necessity proved it. Her second came slower. She was somewhere else. That was to say, she was looking at a ceiling that was unfamiliar to her. She’d seen her own many, many times, and of late, had seen quite a bit of Pinkie’s high vaulted ceiling as well. This was neither of those. Wherever she was, she was warm and comfortable, so at the very least she was likely with a friend, or with family. This was not her parents’ home, however. Actually, the wood told her that she was likely with one of three friends, as nothing was made of clouds here. Slowly, and with not an inconsiderable amount of difficulty, she tilted her head, and was presented with a second clue: a bird cage on a gilded pedestal. Her mind mulled that over, first eliminating Applejack’s farmhouse, then, more slowly, Twilight’s library. That one she had to think about, as she tried to remember what exactly it was that her pet owl slept on. That only left one friend as a possibility. She puzzled at that, trying to remember how it was that this had transpired. Her inebriated brain, when consulted, informed her that to its knowledge, she and Fluttershy were going through a tiff of some sort. It had no immediate answers as to the hows or whys, just that the situation she found herself in was unusual. Not unwelcome, but odd. She remembered... a bar. She had been talking to a friend... to Applejack, that was it. Many drinks had been had, and better times discussed. They had left the bar to come to... here, actually. They had come here to fetch Pinkie. Was Pinkie here, then? A quick consultation with her ears informed her that it was unlikely. There was no sound of anything breaking, nor exclamatory speech, nor song. The room was very quiet, save for some noises of small animals, and a less distinct but still recognizable sound. Somepony was sweeping up something. So, she was drunk, on Fluttershy’s couch. She was wrapped up in something warm and pleasant. That spoke of being there of the owner’s volition, at least. She thought hard, trying to discern how this could have transpired. She remembered... talking with Applejack on the way to this very cottage. Applejack had asked her if she might wish to try reconciling again. At the time, she’d said no... but here she was, with a missing block of time in her memory. Had she... somehow, reconciled with Fluttershy, and then passed out? The blanket was... beginning to feel a little warm, actually. She slowly and carefully removed it, then chanced sitting up. The room spun around her, and she collapsed back onto the couch. Ah yes, you’ve definitely overindulged, idiot. She tried again, hoping the room had had its fun with her and might be willing to show a little mercy. And indeed, the room stayed quite still. Her stomach, however, lurched first to the left, then the right, then thrust forward in a sickening motion as she finally managed to achieve some semblance of balance. Let’s... let’s not do that again. “Rarity! You lie back down this instant!” A gentle but firm hoof wrapped around her shoulders and attempted to steer her back down into the cushions. “You’re, um… you’re in no condition…” She heard a loud swallow, and the hoof on her shoulders trembled. “I mean, um…” “I’ve—” Rarity’s stomach did its little dance in reverse, and she bit back a surge of fluid that threatened to spill all over Fluttershy’s floor. “I’ve... just gone to the trouble of sitting up, and fear trying to lay back down would have horrible results. Would you mind if I sit, very very carefully?” Several incoherent squeaks followed before Fluttershy swallowed again. “If you need to sit up, then we’ll have you sit up.” Taking a deep breath, she plucked two cushions from the further side of the sofa and stuffed them behind Rarity. “We’ll do whatever’s best for you.” “Th-thank you.” Rarity replied with a little shudder. “Just... give me a moment to compose myself.” Fluttershy took a step back, her eyes meeting Rarity’s briefly before skittering away to the safer corners of the room. A flush crept into her cheeks. “Okay. Do you need a… a bucket?” “That—” Rarity clamped her mouth shut as her stomach tried to leap up through her mouth, and somehow managed to belch through gritted teeth. “That would be very wise. And... do you have any mint tea, by chance? Or ginger. Ginger would work.” “Of course!” Several loose pieces of paper flew off of the end table and fluttered to the ground as the pegasus whisked into the kitchen. Moments later, she returned with a delicate white pail and placed it gently on the couch beside Rarity. “The tea will just be a moment.” She stood before Rarity for a moment, fidgeting, before turning back to the kitchen. “In fact, I-I’ll just go check on that.” Rarity eyed the pail warily, uncertain if it was up for the task it needed to perform. She forbore from utilizing it, but brought it up to the coffee table, just in case. Looking towards the kitchen, she watched Fluttershy flit about, equally uncertain of whether her friend was up for the task asked of her. “Darling... where—” Another heave cut her question short, and she very nearly stained the pail with some unequine mixture of bile and assorted hard liquors. She took a moment to catch her breath, then tried again. “Where is Pinkie Pie?” China clinked in the kitchen. “She’s probably back at Sugarcube Corner by now. She, um… well, they needed to get you home, so she wanted to try to fit you into her saddlebag. Applejack was just going to put you over her back and trot you back to the boutique.” Fluttershy appeared again, flying carefully through the door frame while holding a serving tray. “It took a little convincing to get them to leave you here. I-I thought you should probably just sleep…” “Well, that... that was very kind of you.” Rarity said, smiling in relief. “We’ve all had a trying day, haven’t we?” “Pinkie sure did,” Fluttershy replied, lifting the teapot and filling Rarity’s cup. “She tried all afternoon, but…” The teapot traveled to the second cup before wavered uncertainly. After a moment, Fluttershy sighed and put the put back down on the serving tray. “Listen to me prattling on when you need to sleep. I’ll just leave this here for you…” Swallowing, she edged away from the table. “Wait, please?” Rarity said quickly. “Would you mind keeping me company for a time? Unless I’m keeping you from your rest, of course. Then by all means.” “You’re not.” Fluttershy’s voice was barely a whisper. “But… Okay.” With a badly trembling hoof, she lifted the teapot again and poured into her own cup, then dropped in two sugarcubes. Rarity noted her friend’s apparent nervousness, and found herself questioning her earlier supposition that a reconciliation had occurred. Her thoughts churned sluggishly in her mind, dulled by a burgeoning hangover. She eventually came to the conclusion that either they had reconciled, and Fluttershy was still nervous around her, or they hadn’t, and Fluttershy was still nervous around her. She blinked. Right, this is Fluttershy. I suppose, then, I should assume to be cautious either way. “Darling,” she began, hesitantly. “I...that is... my outburst, earlier... I—” “I don’t blame you.” Fluttershy set her cup down and pressed her forehooves between her knees. Her eyes were glued to the gentle swirls within her tea. “I deserved it. All of it. I… I know you don’t want to see me anymore, and that’s fine. It’s what I get for what I did. I understand. I just hope we talk sometimes, for… for Pinkie, you know? It’s important to her.” “Now wait just a—” Rarity began with a raised voice, then winced as a thousand jackhammers assaulted the depths of her skull. “Wait,” she said in a much lower tone. “I was angry, but I never said I didn’t want to see you, darling. The whole point to inviting you over was to attempt to reconcile, even if I botched it completely.” Fluttershy opened her mouth a few times, searching. Finally, her hoof jerked out and snatched up her teacup. She took a large sip, grimacing at the heat. “Rarity…” The hoof trembled again. “Was it just for her?” “It was for her, in part, but for you as well, and for myself.” Rarity winced again as her body reminded her very directly why doing what she had done was a very bad idea. “I... I wanted to just go on resenting you for what you did, but... you’re a dear, dear friend, and... I’d like to think that... that we can be friends again, despite all of this awfulness. Pinkie... simply forced me to admit that I badly wanted that again, even if my pride said otherwise.” Fluttershy’s lower lip trembled, and the teacup chattered and skipped across the saucer as she fought to put it down with both hooves. “I thought I was a dear, dear friend, too. Don’t you see, Rarity?” Her face crumpled before she hid it behind her wing. “I thought I was a good friend, but I did that. I did it. When you needed me, I lied and hid and ran! How can I be anypony’s friend after that? I can’t trust myself!” “You were...frightened. We often flee when confronted with something that makes us uncomfortable—” “Not often! Always! I can’t face anything, and this time it hurt somepony, Rarity!” Rarity audibly hissed in pain as Fluttershy’s words rang out through the cottage. Several birds and small animals woke from their peaceful slumbers and began making a cacophony in protest. Fluttershy bolted from the chair and into the air. “See? I’m doing it again! I’ve hurt you! I’m waking the animals!” She ran a shaking hoof through her now tangled mane, sweeping it back from her tear-stained face. “I-I’ll go. I’m sorry! I’m so sorry for everything!” She darted to the right, then veered away as she nearly ran into a hanging lamp only to tangle a wing in her curtain. With a cry, she fell. “Fluttershy!” Rarity called out in alarm, struggling to unsteady hooves and rushing to her friend’s side. “Are you hurt?” On the floor, Fluttershy curled into a tight ball and cried. “N-not as badly as I d-d-deserve to be,” she finally managed. Rarity eased herself down beside Fluttershy, smoothing back her matted mane. “You didn’t deserve any of this, Fluttershy. If... if I could, I would take it all back with that blasted letter. It was better, before. Neither of us were ready for what I told you.” “You shouldn’t have to take them back.” Fluttershy’s voice was thick with misery. “W-what you did was out of love. Not me, though. I did what I did because I was scared.” Fluttershy turned onto her back for a moment before completing the turn and burying her face into the side of Rarity’s barrel. “Anypony can see the difference and what it means.” Rarity’s eyes widened at the simple act of closeness, and she held her breath lest Fluttershy flee again. Slowly, she put her hooves around Fluttershy. “Love...” she mused, stroking Fluttershy’s mane gently. “You know, I wonder sometimes if I ever really knew what that was. I’ve been in love so many times, and every time I thought it was the one.” Rarity sighed heavily, “But... I think I’ve only ever been loved once. It’s... a bit overwhelming, to be honest. I think I can see why you were afraid.” Fluttershy tipped her head away just enough to catch Rarity’s eye. “I wish I could see why. I’d give anything to be a different pony. A braver one. Somepony you could count on to do the right thing when it gets scary. Instead…” She hid her face again, pressing more firmly into Rarity’s side. “Well, you did, in a way. You... you could have pretended to love me, despite yourself. You could have just lived a lie. You didn’t do that, and... and while avoidance might not have been my preferred way of being turned down, it... it did the job, in the end. Thank you for being brave enough for that.” A long silence stretched out between them, interrupted only by muffled sniffling and the occasional twitter or squeak from the critters that surround them. Then, haltingly, Fluttershy reached out and took Rarity’s hoof. “I’m glad you have Pinkie,” she said. “Those letters. They were so sweet and wonderful at the beginning, even though they scared me and I didn’t know what to do. I felt just awful that I didn’t feel the way that you felt, but they were also pieces of you. I missed you so badly while you were away, and…” —Fluttershy’s voice shook again— “... and it m-made it s-so hard, Rarity. You were following your passion and trying to share your love. I admired it. You should have somepony to write those letters to, and I hope Pinkie is the one. The one that I’m not. The one who deserves you.” “Pinkie’s wonderful,” Rarity said with a little chuckle. “I think... I think I love her in a way I’ve never loved anypony in my life. I... I never know quite how to feel, when she’s around. She keeps me on my toes, to be sure. But... I don’t know that I would write those sorts of things to her. I love her in ways I will never love you, and while it might have been easier on me to have fallen for her first, I won’t pretend that I did. But... just the same, I love you in ways I will never love her, even if you don’t feel the same. I... I suppose that will never really change,” she hugged Fluttershy a little tighter. “You’ll need to tell me what sort of stallion you’re looking for, so that we can find you a nice one. Then we can double date.” Fluttershy’s head turned again, and this time her eyes held equal parts confusion and hope. “Can we… I mean, do you really still want to be my friend after all that, Rarity? Really be my friend?” “Well, of course!” Rarity replied with a smile. “How else am I supposed to find you somepony worthy of you? Now, tell me, did any of those nice lads in Whinneypeg catch your eye? What did you like in particular?” Fluttershy slowly sat up and wiped her eyes, then threw her hooves around her friend. “Oh, Rarity! I didn’t know what I was going to do without you!” “All the better that neither of us have to find out,” Rarity said, returning the embrace.