“Gilgamesh, views on biological warfare?” Grinned the doctor, pushing his mask slightly up, the quiet squeak of gas escaping a high pressure tank sounding from afar.
“Extremely against it,” the displaced replied grimly. “There are other more humane methods for killing if such a high number of casualties are necessary. I’d even prefer burning people to death instead.”
“I see, so you may want to run then, because in a second or two you’re going to be infected!” The madpony cheered, wisps of blackish gasses coming from his failing containment suit.
“Hm… maybe this could be a good chance to test and build up immunity to so such attacks…” he muttered nonchalantly. “Very well, you may fire when ready.”
“Uh, why was Dr. Plague smoking?” Dusk asked, slowly stepping towards the doctor.
“Why my dear Dusk, didn’t you get the memo?” The doctor asked, keeping his distance from the creeping mare, “I am classed as a class-6 biological weapon and need my suit to keep what makes me a biological weapon contained! ” Turning towards Dusk and removing his mask to expose the rotting chitin beneath.
“Huh, so you are a changeling. Glad to see my aura sense was right,” Gilgamesh muttered.
“... I don't get it?” Dusk said as she stood there as if nothing was going on.
“Huh, weird. You should have collapsed by now from the plague eating away your lungs. Also, Gilgamesh, have you ever felt as your entire body is constantly eaten away and then regenerated at the same rate in a perpetual cycle? It hurts like hell.”
“Nope. And I’ve experienced several kinds of pains and injuries in my lifetime,” Gilgamesh replied.
“...” Dusk stared at the ‘good’ doctor and Gilgamesh with a horrified expression before meekly backing away in a similar fashion to a certain pink maned pegasus.
“... So, should I be feeling anything now?” Gilgamesh asked nonchalantly.
“Well I should think so. I mean, there is the possibility that the plague wouldn’t affect you, but otherwise you should be slowly losing flesh as it is eaten away.” Plague explained.
“... Mmmmmnope. Nothing.”
“Huh, well I guess I can go spread it around the SPD building and then go for a walk, also have you seen my pills? I forgot to take mine today and I forget why, but they are supposed to stop something but I can’t remember what. Also Dusk, your appointment is scheduled for next week.” Said the doctor, acting like he was doing nothing wrong.
“I’m a being from another dimension who’s shrugged off meteors hitting him dead on, please don’t compare my body to your co-workers and use them as experiments. Also, I think those are your pills,” he pointed to a bottle on the table with the warning label “For Dr. Plague. DO NOT FORGET TO TAKE,” written in bright red.
“MINE!” Shouted Plague as he dived towards the pills and began nomming on a couple.
“Oh, that’s right, I forgot!” Gilgamesh began. “My armor protects me from ‘Status effects’. I guess your disease falls under ‘Poison.’ That’s why it doesn’t work.”
“Huh? What are you talking about?... Why can I see clearly?! Where’s my mask?!” Shouted Dr. Plague as he began searching around while trying to stay away from the personal that stayed behind.
“You… took it off? Don’t you remember?” Gilgamesh asked, obviously confused.
“... I forgot to take my pills again didn’t I?” *Sigh* “Every time, why can’t I remember to take the bleddin pills! I know I need them, so why can’t I remember!”
“Maybe you need an assistant?” He suggested. “Also, I figured out why I survived your disease, but how did you manage to survive it, Dusk?” When he got no response he turned to see she was gone. “Oh. Well, probably a smart move. I wonder what she is, though?”
“Yeah, what a mystery,” agreed the doctor, shifting his eyes back and forth.
“Probably some kind of ‘darkness pony’ or something, afraid of being ostracized if anyone finds out, maybe has been her whole life. Poor girl, I wish her the best. Oh, and don’t worry, I won’t let anyone know you’re a changeling. You should probably tell them anyway, though. I’m sure it won’t be a big deal. Just use the ‘you never asked’ excuse,” Gilgamesh said simply.
At this the doctor simply turned his head to stare at Gilgamesh, “I am both a changeling and undead and my body looks like a corpse. How can that go over well?”
“My adopted son is a displaced, the grandson of a goddess of death, the final member of an ancient race of violent ice giants, has an advanced alien watch that can transform him into thousands if not millions of different species, and was raised by a human who once travelled to Equestria to a time well before the Princesses. He’s been coronated as an Equestrian Prince and married to both Rarity and Queen Chrysalis and is seen as a hero by both ponies and changelings.”
The doctor just stared, a no doubt befuddled look under his helmet.
“My point is, I’ve seen many versions of Equestria accept weirder than you, and this seems to be one of the more accepting versions I’ve seen.”
Plague chuckled. “You know, the Commander said the same thing to me basically. Maybe there is some truth to it. Also, I really should go talk to HEART. I doubt she even realizes who I am anymore. It’s been so long since I last saw and talked with her.” The doctor mumbles to himself as he begins to walk off in search of HEART.
“Ending simulation, welcome back Dr. Plague and Gilgamesh. We hope you had fun being idiots.” Said the computer and after we got our bearings, we decided to never speak about what happened in the simulation and we went our separate ways.