//------------------------------// // Annoying Uncles // Story: Queen Mommy // by Evowizard25 //------------------------------// Politics were never my forte. I was much more at home on the battlefield, bathing in the blood of my enemies. My father’s rituals were rather crude, but they were fun to perform. Sometimes I ponder doing another job for him. He was always open, yet I knew better. He’d rope me into another job afterwards and then another. I got out of his stupid chaos wars. I’m not going back, especially not with my family. So now I was stuck looking over enough paperwork to fill up a small library. There were piles and piles of it and honestly, I wanted to burn it all to ash. I couldn’t. Celestia had already reprimanded me for doing that once. I wasn’t in the mood to hear it again. I wasn’t in the mood for a lot of things right now. I would literally do anything to be elsewhere. Well, anything except a meeting with the nobles. Nobles never change, no matter the time or species. They just make me want to bite their bloated heads off. “Looks like someone’s agitated,” a mocking voice echoed around the room. I recognized it instantly. My eyes widened as I foresaw my upcoming headache. Said headache materialized in the middle of the room. It was none other than Discord. “What are you doing here, Discord?” I narrowed my eyes. He never just showed up. He always had a plan stuffed somewhere in his body. He was a lot like dad and that’s one of the reasons I disliked him. “Can’t a guy visit his big sister whenever he wants?” Discord pouted. He fell forwards, catching himself on the edge of the desk. He gave me a puppy dog stare. “It’s been too long since we’ve talked. It feels like you don’t love me anymore.” I snorted, “I don’t have time for this.” “But you have time for that little toy of yours,” Discord walked beside me, wearing traditional pegasus armor. “What’s his name? Fluttercane?” “Hurricane,” I snarled. I had to resist killing him. Mom made me promise. Besides, it was unlikely I could anyways. There are ways to kill us, but they are extremely difficult. It would still make me happy to try. “He is not my toy. He is my husband.” “Ah yes,” Discord nodded and cupped his hands against his head. His face became a rather cartoonishly exaggerated caricature. His eyes were larger and had long eyelashes and his face sparkled. “Love.” He shook his head, thankfully stowing away his nightmare fuel face. “Such a dreadful thing. It’ll be your undoing, sister.” “Oh please,” I rolled my eyes. “You’re one to talk. Aren’t you friends with the princesses?” “Acquaintances,” Discord huffed, crossing his arms. “I only took the job they offered because I was bored.” I rolled my eyes once more. Discord was always soft on Celestia. She had practically raised him, just like myself. I still don’t know why she made him the royal advisor. Well I can guess. Celestia was probably bored and wanted someone fun nearby. Discord fit the bill. “Why are you here? I don’t recall ever inviting you over.” “You didn’t,” Discord grinned. He opened up a little door in the center of his forehead and reached in. He pulled out a large book and the door vanished. “You see, I have pictures of all our family’s greatest moments. Every one of us has a few pictures in here. Yet, for some time this thing has been ringing non-stop. It’s almost like we have more family.” He grinned, causing me to gulp. “So I asked Celestia and she told me the truth.” No, oh mother no. He couldn’t know about my children. He couldn’t. If he knew, he could do things to them. He could mess up their minds, lead them astray. Turn them into hooligans. Make them wear tack knick knacks! He pulled me into a hug and laughed, “I’m an uncle! Oh I can’t wait to meet them.” He let go and let me hit the floor. I was going to make him pay for that. “On second thought, I hate waiting.” Three balls of light appeared in his hands: blue, purple, and orange. He started juggling them until they turned into my babies! Adagio and Aria cried out in alarm. Sonata just started laughing, enjoying the random event. “Oh ho, they are a strange bunch.” Discord laughed as he kept juggling them. “I like it. I like it a lot.” “Put them down!” I shouted, powering up a magic blast. “Fine,” he caught them one at a time in a huge catcher’s mitt. He lowered it down, but not before Adagio jumped forward and chomped on his nose. “I didn’t need that anyways.” He pulled off Adagio and his nose and gave my kids back to me. Thankfully, his nose had turned into a soft plastic squeaky toy. He just up and grew another one. “Thank you,” I huffed. Aria was shivering in my hold. I was going to kill him one day. Sonata was still laughing, holding out her hooves to Discord. She really wanted to go back to him, unfortunately. “No Sonata. He’s not someone you should be playing with.” Sonata started to whimper and I could tell she was going to cry. Discord leaned down on his knees and I eyed him suspiciously. He calmly held out his hand and stroked Sonata’s head. “We can play later, okay?” Sonata giggled and rubbed her head on his paw. Discord smiled, “I think I found my favorite.” “My daughters are equally impressive,” I snarled. “You can’t have a favorite. You have to love all of them equally.” Discord rolled his eyes, “Equality is overrated. I don’t want to tell you how frustrating it is to listen to Clover the Clever go on and on about it. I swear, one of his descendents is going to let equality go to their head and that’ll be the end of us.” I shook my head. Clover was eccentric, but he was harmless. “Other than using my daughters as play things, why are you here?” Discord jumped back to his feet, “I just wanted to check up on you.” He disappeared, only to reappear on my head as a young version of himself. “You know, like good little brother’s do.” I growled, “You were never a good little brother. You were the bane of my existence.” He slinked down to the ground and grew back to his original age. In the process, he took on a goth-like appearance. “I see someone’s still going through her emo phase.” He waggled his finger condescendingly. I snapped at him, “Do not call it that! I’m not going through a phase.” Discord laughed. He pulled a zipper on his side and walked out of his goth skin. Throwing it aside, it turned into a lamp that looked sort of like me. If I wore goth clothes with a sign that said ‘This is the real me’. “Sure you aren’t. Anyways, aside from that and your adorable littler ones, I had to remind you that mom’s coming to visit.” My skin went white. Literally. “What?” Discord nodded, “Yep. She wants to meet her grandkids and if I know dad, he’s going to grow curious and show up as well sometime soon. Just wanted to run that by you.” He went to walk towards one of my walls. “Oh and I’ll be moving to the castle. I can’t wait to play with those adorable abominations some more.” He opened up a hole on the wall by knocking on it three times. The wall lead to a purple realm with all sorts of monsters, screams, and nonsensical things. I really hated the warp. “Auf Wiedersehen.” As he left, I couldn’t help but think on what he had said. Mom was coming over? Here? I wasn’t ready. None of us were. She was a goddess of chaos. She was going to ask why I hadn’t destroyed this world yet. She was going to get angry and she… she… I pulled my kids close to me and I knew they felt my distress. They nuzzled in close to me as though trying to comfort me. My heart melted at that and I teleported them to their bedroom. I laid them down in their little play pen and kissed their heads, “Stay here and please don’t try and make a fuss. Mommy has a lot of things going on.” The little one’s gave me a smile as if to say ‘okay’. They were going to be safe. No matter what, my babies weren’t going to be affected by this if it was the last thing I did. I sighed in relief and teleported myself back to my room. I woozily walked back to my desk. Odd, I felt a little weaker. It was nothing. Just a headache from dealing with Discord. Yet, I couldn’t help but remember being stronger a moment ago. That changed when my emotions became negative. That’s probably just my body being strange. Changeling don’t do well with negative emotions. Still, it felt like someone was nibbling on them. It wasn’t much, but… I chuckled. No, I was thinking things. Starswirl’s diagnosis was probably wrong and even so, it didn’t matter. They were my children. They needed positive emotions, not negative ones if they wanted to be strong and healthy. I was going to make sure they were treated like the true rulers they will one day become. That I swear. Now I just needed to work out how to make my home chaos proof. I held my head in my hooves. Oh dear, I guess my headache is going to be worse than I thought. The door opened up and in walked Celestia. “I sensed Discord,” she simply said and walked over to me. “Is everything alright?” “Just peachy,” I laid my head down on my desk and groaned. “My mom’s coming over.” Celestia blinked in surprise, “Well that’s certainly something.” She trotted around the desk and pulled me into a hug with her wing. She let me have a little snack on her love, which did help my headache considerably. “I’m sure it’ll work itself out. She does love you.” “Yes, but she hates harmony and peace.” I shook slightly as I recalled my mother’s hateful gaze. She never directed it towards me, but I really didn’t want to be near it. “The moment she sees what it’s like here and that I made it happen, she’ll hate me. She’ll try and take it all from me: my home, my husband, my…” “Chrysalis,” Celestia laid her head over my own in a motherly fashion. “You’re overreacting. I know your mother. She’s a lot more understanding then you give her credit for.” She pulled back and raised my face to meet hers. It’s not surprising I think of her as a second mother. “No matter what happens, I’ll support you. You have my word, I’ll do everything in my power to keep her happy as well as you and your family.” I smiled, “Thank you. Just… thank you.” I pulled her into a deeper hug. She chuckled as she returned it, “Of course. What are babysitters for?” “Stealing cakes from parents?” I quipped, causing us both to laugh.