//------------------------------// // XXXIV: Peace // Story: Memoirs of a Magic Earth Pony // by The Lunar Samurai //------------------------------// The following week was one that drifted by solemnly. Evenstar had barred himself in his office since the revelation that his work had been compromised, and Amethyst and I had faithfully returned to the laboratory during his absence. I think we both put more thought into Evenstar and his condition than we did with the work we performed. There was something wrong with the way he stormed out of the room, the way he just left us to idle while he retreated. In a way, I think we were angry at him for, what we perceived as abandonment. We didn’t want to be left alone, we felt aimless without his intelligence. Never was this illustrated so clearly as the end of the week during one of our attempts at brilliance. “What are you doing?” I asked as Amethyst added to the scribbles on the board. “You can’t just put those two functions together like that.” Amethyst paused for a moment and cocked her head to the side. She studied the board for a moment before finally letting her gaze fall with a sigh. “You’re right, Starswirl… Thanks.” “Hey, it’s alright,” I started, trying to breathe some life into her, but she didn’t seem to care. I had taken on the role of supervisor since Evenstar had stepped out and I was clearly out of my league. Amethyst knew more, but she had become so accustomed to taking orders that she would regularly ask me what to do after she finished a task. “It’s not okay, Starswirl. I never mess up like this. This is the third time today and I’ve done nothing.” The words hung in the air as the two of us watched the erroneous formula smudge to nothingness beneath the eraser. We had tried our best, that much was obvious, but there was nothing we could do but stumble aimlessly in the dark without Evenstar’s guidance. I knew we wanted to succeed, to be able to be like him, but he had something that neither of us had. He could conjure up things that fit the framework of math, and we could help him in getting the proofs written, but we were unable to do the same when he was away. We were a team, and with our leader gone, we were nothing. “Why are we even trying?” I muttered as I let my rump drop to the floor. “There’s nothing here that we can uncover without him.” Amethyst looked to the crossed out attempts at different proofs. Nothing coherent had formed from our stumbling research, and nothing sparked in us to continue our fruitless efforts. “I’m not sure anymore…” she finally admitted before releasing a hearty yawn and dropping to the floor. “I don’t want to leave though, there’s something soothing about this place. I tried my best to push the memories of being watched out of my mind. I just wanted to take a break from the constant failure. It was relentless, and with several hours left in the day, the two of us had finally given up our pursuit. The question now was what do we do with ourselves? Amethyst and I sat on the floor in silence for several minutes, neither of us talking, just simply resting as we were, idly letting that precious time slip away from us. It was peaceful for a short time, but the longer we waited, the more anxious I felt. There was something about doing nothing that started to get underneath my skin, something that really started to bother me on a fundamental level. Sitting around, wasting time, it felt… wrong, like there was something I could be doing, but yet, there was nothing that I could do. Amethyst let out a sigh and rested her head onto her hooves. A moment later, and amethyst had retrieved a book from one of the shelves and levitated it before her face. It looked as though she could keep sitting there for hours, just idling the time away with her muzzle tucked into the story before her. I had always admired her for her ability to look past roadblocks like the one we now faced. As she began turning the pages to her story, I was left to my own thoughts, which were beginning to revolve around her. There was something inside me that just wanted to do the same as her, sit down and read a book, but books never really captured my attention for more than a few moments at best. I really didn’t have anything I could do aside from ponder what I might do, and as I did so, Amethyst began to frown. “Are you staring at me?” Her comment caught me off guard, but my trancelike state kept my mind level enough for a slightly coherent response. “There’s nothing better to do.” “Do you not read books?” She asked, her question growing more pointed with each word. “Never anything fake.” “Fake? You mean fictional?” She asked as she set her book onto the floor and cast and angry glance in my direction. I’m not sure what caused her consternation, but as her eyes locked with mine, I noticed they softened a bit. It may have been my clueless expression, or something deeper, but her spark of rage dwindled and she let out a heavy sigh. “So you’ve never read any fiction?” I shrugged in response. It had never been something that piqued my interest, so I never decided to pursue it. “So what do you do for fun?” “What do you mean?” I automatically responded as my mind began to process her implication. That familiar silence filled the room once more as I pondered her question. “You know, what do you do when you take a break from life?” “Well…” I stopped as my mind drew a blank. “I… don’t.” It was hard to say, especially as Amethyst’s eyebrow rose in confusion. I had always had my sights set on the future, trying so desperately to be part of the magical realm, that I had lost sight of who I was. It wasn’t a feeling that settled very well as a frown stretched across my face. “So no hobbies…” Amethyst muttered as her eyes drifted to the cracked chalkboard on the wall. “You’ve just done magic?” I nodded blankly. Magic was my passion, there had never been a reason to pursue something else to get my satisfaction in life. It was all I ever really wanted in life, and this was the first time that desire had been questioned. “Is that a problem?” “No…” Amethyst shrugged as she turned back to her book, “I just don’t see how somepony can’t take a break from working all the time.” “I love magic,” I retorted, my voice making Amethyst tense defensively. “I didn’t mean that…” Her voice trailed off as she turned her attention to her book. That was the first time I really made an effect on her. I didn’t mean to push her away, and yet the harshness of my voice did just that. It made her recoil, kept her from opening up, and I had caused it. “Amethyst?” I asked, trying to keep her from closing off once more. “I didn’t mean it like that… I just… well…” Amethyst turned to me and opened her mouth to speak, but her eyes said multitudes more than her words ever did. She wasn’t mad, bitter, or upset, she wanted to say something but something else held her back. “It’s alright, Starswirl. I understand.” “Amethyst?” I asked, this time much more quietly. “What do you do for fun?” The comment wasn’t beyond our conversation, however she seemed taken aback by it. Maybe she had assumed the silence that had surrounded us was permanent, maybe she believed that I wouldn’t care to respond, but regardless, she jumped all the same. “Well…” she started as she set down her book, “I read for starters. I’ve done it ever since I was a filly. Other than that, I like astronomy a lot. There’s something fun about exploring the stars.” “Really?” “You sound surprised,” she said with a sly smile as she folded her book and withdrew a large rolled up sheet of paper from the side of the room. “With your cutiemark as a swirling set of stars, I’m surprised you haven’t looked into astronomy.” She rose to her hooves as she unfurled the scroll onto an empty table and silently walked over to it. I followed and watched her as she scrutinized the page. It was obvious that she was enthralled with the complicated chart, but I was more fascinated with the attention she was giving to it. I could only imagine that was how I felt whenever I started looking at magic. Amethyst quickly met my glance before pursing her lips and focusing on the map once more. “Thinking about something?” Blissfully unaware is how I would describe my actions up until this point. Henceforth, they were all quite calculated. “Oh uhh… sorry… just kinda… you know...” My mind raced to find an answer to why I had been staring into her eyes for seconds on end, but despite my best efforts, I was left stuttering like an idiot before her. She stifled a laugh and pointed to the map before speaking up once more. “Trust me, this is much more fascinating.” I said nothing. At this point, my lips had sealed themselves in a desperate attempt to keep me from sounding like a fool once more. I only nodded and turned my ever diminishing focus to the map before us. It was even more complicated than I realized at first. Intricate lines between the stars drew crude images of ponies in different positions. “Wow,” I whispered beneath my breath as leaned into the page. “I knew about a few of these… constellations, but I never knew there were so many of them.” Amethyst smiled. “That’s only half of them. If you travel to the other side of the world, they’re completely different. And you know the best part?” Her eyes sparkled with passion as I looked to them once more. “What is it?” “They’re older than dirt.” I frowned. “That’s not very fascinating.” “Oh but it is! Those constellations used to be everything for ancient ponies. They would write about them, sing about them, use them to navigate, use them to tell the season, they were like gods to them.” “I never really thought about it like that,” I said as I looked back to the map. Something about it seemed to beg me to inquire more, and, since time was in abundance, I did. “What kind of stories did they tell?” I think my question may have made Amethyst just a little bit too excited, not in any negative sense, mind you. She went on for hours, lecturing me on the intricacies off the celestial gods and the whimsical tales that the ages had strung together. At times I would ask more questions, but mostly I was trying to keep her talking. It was entertaining to watch her get genuinely excited about something like this, and I only wished I had seen her in her element sooner. There was something magical about the way she just couldn’t help herself when it came to talking about something she loved. As the day grew old, our eyes turned skyward as she continued telling the wondrous stories. Tales of warriors, pegasi, and the ever present northern start that kept watch filled the air was we took in the spectacle above us. It was a pleasant time, a time when we could both forget the hardships of life and just watch the stars drift past. Peace… That’s the first time I really experienced it with another pony. It was a reassuring feeling, one that I would cherish forever more, but at that time, I felt happy. It wasn’t a feeling I felt often sadly enough, but that night I have no other words to describe my emotions. There wasn’t a pressure to be somepony that others said I couldn’t be, there wasn’t a drive to be developing the next magical proof, there was simply a spark of joy.