Yes, what a morning it had been. It wasn't enough that I had breakfast with a—admittedly very nice—pony, but I ended up getting bear-hug-cuddled by her in front of dozens of other ponies… And that one guy suggesting I should hit first base with her was something that sent shivers crawling through my skin every time I thought about it. Well, either that or Cheerilee's fine fur still left an impressing on my senses.
Whatever. It was done and dusted and swept in the trash can. At least I can get on with my day doing… well, whatever it was I was doing. I was aware that I came back here in order to face the scorn of Twilight and her friends, but right now… Well, I hadn't a clue what I was going to do. For the moment I just let my feet do the work for me, letting them take me wherever they went while Mr. Brain sat back to think of what to do.
Even with a fairly good night sleep and a nice breakfast I still felt tired. My blurred eyes could just about make out sun from scenery. The overexposure of the light just made everything glaring to look at. It took some effort to focus my eyes to see everything properly, though shading them with a hand certainly helped. As everything came into correct focus I was met by the glares of other ponies staring around at me. Though they were not gazing at me with suspicion or fear or discrimination; or at least not that I could make out. No, it seemed they were more so in awe or expecting of me like I was some sort of knight.
Though to be honest, I would look pretty awesome in some plate. Paladin master class.
My eyes gazed around, shifting left to right to left, scanning the populace that walked the pavement with me. They all followed me with their huge colorful eyes as they walked past me, whether or not they were walking the same or opposite direction as me. I noticed a few of them stood by a shop corner halt their conversation just to glance at me, switching from open voices to hushed tones. Other groups and couples seemed to follow suit.
Some of those conversations I could overhear.
"Do you think he went to see her?" One whispered.
"I dunno. He certainly looks the part," another replied.
"With those clothes, I wouldn't be surprised," a third pony chimed.
What exactly are they talking about? Rarity? I did go see her and get new clothes from there, but from what I had seen of her own creations they weren't exactly in tune with my own fashion. That and the fact that everything she had were designed for ponies, not humans. Mr. Brain decided to switch his work from figuring out what to do next with working alongside Mr. Curiosity to get to the bottom of this. Though I had the sneaking suspicion that this wasn't going to end well.
I paused for a minute and took a quick glance at a couple of ponies I had overheard. I could see them seize up as I caught their glances. Their stone-like stances turned to shaking chains when I approached them. I feared that talking to them might make them melt.
But then again, that does sound funny. Let's give it a shot.
"Sorry to bother you," I spoke up, "but I don't suppose you could tell me who you're referring to?"
The both of them glanced at each other for a second before one of them replied, "Um… We're referring to you…?"
"Um… No, I mean, referring to who it was you thought I went to see."
The two paused. The other of the pair raised an eyebrow. "You mean you didn't go to see her?"
"Um… see who?"
She rolled her eyes. "My gosh, Berry, he didn't go see her!"
"I know, right, Cherry? Talk about missing out!" her friend added with a hipshot.
"Missing out on what?"
"On the event, of course!"
"…What event?"
"Her event at the plaza!"
"Whose event?"
"I can't believe he doesn't know, Berry."
"I know, right, Cherry? Talk about living under a rock!"
I could feel the skin on my forehead ready to tear from the bone with how hard my brow had furrowed from the lost patience. But, I wasn't gonna get mad. Nope, not today. Today was gonna be a good day.
"Look… could you just tell me about the event?"
"Pfft. She sets up the event here every few moons for her fashion magazines!"
"Who? Who sets the up? Rarity?"
"Noooo, not Rarity! Duh, everyone knows Rarity just makes clothes!"
"You woulda thought he'd know something simple like that, Berry."
"I know, right, Cherry? Talk about dense!"
I lost the plot. "Just tell me who's running to event!" I yelled out. At like that, time froze for what felt like ice ages. As soon as I did it, I felt bad.
The two ponies paused for a moment before scowling at me. "Photo Finish, obviously! You shoulda asked that in the first place!"
"Yeah, talk about being rude!" And with that, the both of them strolled on down the street, turning their noses up at me.
Those two are definitely getting first class tickets to Suplex City.
The plaza was completely packed. Everywhere I looked I could only see a rainbow see of brightly coloured ponies gathered around a huge almost opera house-sized stage. Huge sheets of sky blue, indigo and violet cloth curtained the platform, casting a light shadow across the wooden boards that made the flooring. A wide catwalk extended outwards from its center.
Huh. Stage, catwalk, clothes… Did they think I was part of some sort of fashion show? Yeah, that would have been quite the scene. I could imagine it loosely. And thankfully that's where it was going to stay; in my head.
Still, one woulda thought that housing a fashion show would have been done in some sort of indoors event, with fancy lighting and sound cues and whatnot. But then again, looking around the place, I didn't see any sort of venue that would fit the description. I guess they had to make do with what they got.
After a moment I watched the backdrop curtains spread a little from the bottom, pleats pushed against one another as a white stallion in a black suit trotted out, making his way through center stage and onto the catwalk. He stopped around the middle of it before clearing his throat, the sound picked up a little by the microphone he head around the side of his muzzle.
"Mares and gentlecolts, it is with great pleasure that I, Colour Commentary, am to announce the start of the Grand Fashion Gallery, where we will show off the latest, the greatest, most astonishing clothing in Equestria! And of course, what kind of event would this be without the most brilliant of designs from Ponyville!"
A huge boom of cheering and whistles torrented the stage and skies like a crashing sea, engulfing everything in its wake. Least of all my poor eardrums.
"And now, mares and gentlecolts, I would leave you with encouraging words from our host—the one, the only, Photo Finish!"
Another round of cheers couple with hoof-filled applause burst out as another pony made their way onto the stage and down the catwalk, the announcer having departed past her. A sky-blue pony, almost like Rainbow Dash, but with shoulder-length white hair and fringe that framed the top of her huge, rose-tinted glasses. She wore a black and white dress, with the top half striped vertically while a white stripe circled near the bottom of the skirting. Smaller pink bands wrapped around, highlighted by similar coloured diamond-shaped patterns. Yet probably the only thing more profound than her attire was her thick, Austrian accent.
Oh my God, it was like looking at a ponified Anna Wintour.
The crowd soon died down like a tide retreating back into the sea. The plaza became deathly quiet. The pony on stage then spoke, "Ponies! I, Photo Finish… have arrived." Once more the crowd burst into cheer. And once more, my ears bleed. "I come here to Ponyville to show you best of the best in Equestrian fashion! I look for dancing grace! For burning passion! For star-skied glamour! Now, without delay, it is time to make… da magicks!"
Suddenly, from the rafters, spotlights of a variety of rainbow colours shone down upon the shining boards of the stage, circling and spiralling in some sort of light show before the colours aligned themselves horizontally along the main stage. From stage left and right numerous ponies, all dressed in various different styles of dresses; ballroom, masquerade, Victorian, bohemian, blue and black… or was it white and gold? I've no idea.
But there was one dress that stood out from the others. One that I had definitely seen before. It was a royal blue dress, with bright, shining gold trimming near the bottom of the skirt and same coloured rose patterns cascading throughout the cloth. Several small layers of alternating frilled royal blue and gold cloth stacked around the saddle of the pony. The collar and neck around the dress had white frills that met around the chest, fastened by a shining, silk white three fall cravat, adorned with the same rose patterns as the dress but in royal blue. On her head perched a large Victorian-styled hat, again coloured royal blue, with three large white feathers sat at the front that swept backwards
I absolutely fell in love with it the moment I had set eyes on it.
Suddenly music kicked it from the stage speakers, blaring out a bass-filled beat and a steady rhythm. The music seemed fitting enough for the event, especially after the crowd began to get completely pumped with energy. Some of them were beating their heads to the music or swaying from side to side on their hooves.
One at a time the models would strut down the catwalk—or whatever the horse equivalent to strutting down the catwalk was—and showed off their marvelous merchandise, turning and posing for the crowd and cameras that laid eyes upon their figure. It was a sight to behold, for sure. I wasn't one for fashion, and I always thought this kind of stuff was a little silly, but… being at one of these events in person was an experience, and not one that I would dare say was terrible in the slightest.
All around me the crowd was electrifying, probably more electrifying than all the power going through those lights and sound equipment. From the dazzling lights, the beating music, the cheering crowd and the flashing of cameras, it was like being at a live rave than it was being at a fashion show. I was anticipating seeing ponies waving around glow sticks.
Hell, even I was starting to sway to the rhythm.
And then I saw my favourite dress make its way down the catwalk. The mix of blue and gold was just dazzling to behold. Beams of sky blue, pale yellow and crisp white mixed in with the attire in a way that its stark contrast in vivid colours became soft and sweet. Instead of comparing her to the backdrop of the stage, I was comparing her to the village around her. The dress fit so well with Ponyville's architecture that it was completely uncanny. But then again, it was Rarity's design after all. It's never just about the clothes themselves, but the scenery around the clothes too, it seemed.
Who needs a goddess of weaving like Athena when you had Rarity on hand, eh?
As the model came every closer to the edge of the catwalk, I couldn't help but just scream out at her. If there was one way to get your approval across, it was to scream it as loud as you could, in caps lock if possible. Gaming forums taught me that much.
I gave out a loud whistle as she posed, her neck reared back with a fore-hoof across her brow to show off not only the dress, but the chest area too. The drawn back feathers of the head nearly touched the top of her hind. "Woohoo! Work it, girl!" I cried out. "Show us whatchya got!" My cheering and applause was met with a sudden stare from the model, coupled with a light hint of pink on her cheeks before she quickly retreated back to the stage. Most of the ponies around me started to give me a wide birth.
Guess I got a little too into things.
As I decided to keep my hands by my side and keep my voice quiet, I noticed a sudden flash of rose in the light. I saw Photo Finish turn to gaze around in my direction, the light flashing off of her glasses as she turned her head. Suddenly she stopped dead still like a turret locked on to its target. Her eyes met with mine. I felt my heart skip a beat.
"Hold da show!" she called out. The lights stayed on the contestants as they lined up along the stage. The volume of the beats turned down several tens of decibels down. She paced from one side of the catwalk to the corner I was closest at. Her pink lenses flashed once more as her head turned downwards towards me. "You! Your attire! It is…"
Horrible? Ghastly? Something that was picked out from the TK Max rejection bin?
"Wonderful!"
… You what?
"I must bring you on stage!"
I now I was, quite literally, even more into it than I wanted to be.
Before I could even so much as react, let alone object, she nudged her head sideward towards the catwalk. Suddenly a few stallions pushed me from behind with the tips of their heads, nudging me to the edge of the platform before hoisting my up onto it. I stood tall in front of God knows how many ponies in the pastel sea before me, all glaring at me. Not one of them blinked. Not one of them smiled. All of them stood like brain-dead zombies waiting for me to do something. And then they'd probably pounce on me and eat my flesh.
"You! What is your name?"
"Uh, I—" my voice suddenly boomed across the plaza from the stage speakers, making the floorboards rumble under my feet. It was quite jarring to say the least. "… My name is Summers."
"Hm. A bright name for a creature with such bright fashion!" I think she was getting a bit delusional. "Your clothes, they are… simple! And yet they burn with passion! With energy! They make… da magicks! Who is your designer? I must simply know!"
"I… I don't have a designer. But my clothes were made by Blizzard."
"Blizzard… I never heard of such a designer. But if a pony so cold can make designs so burning hot, then I must simply meet them! But first, I want you to pose!"
"… You what?"
"To pose! Pose for the camera! Pose for the audience! Show them your burning hot passion!"
To be honest, the last time I did that was in the bedroom. "Listen, Miss, uh… Photo Finish? I'm really no here to—"
"Less talk, more posing!" With more speed than The Flash, she moved my hands onto the side of my hips, arched my back a bit to pump out my chest, and kept my chin up and looking out ahead. "Good! Hold that pose! Turn up da music!" The rhythm began pick up once more, the bass rumbling through the stage. Flashes of cameras bombarded me every quarter second. Even the crowd was starting to cheer for me.
I felt fantastic!
"Yes, keep going!" I heard Photo Finish call out from the side of the walkway, her camera poised to snap more pictures. Where did she hide that thing, anyway? "The burning! The passion! The grace! Show it to the camera!"
I guess I just had to do what I had to do. I struck pose after pose, trying to work whatever I thought would be great. Fingers through my hair, hands behind my head, arms spread wide, whatever I thought looked cool. I guess from the crowd reaction, they thought it looked cool too. I even made a pointing pose and a smile to one of the mares in the crowd just to see her reaction. I think she half-fainted though. Woops.
"More, more, MORE!"
I… really had no idea what to do next. Then suddenly I gripped the neck of my top, pulling it over my head. I heard several gasps in the crowd—and on the stage—when they saw me bare my body to the crowd. I think I heard Photo Finish drop her camera too. But I didn't think it would bother them that much to see me naked considering that… well they're ponies; they always walk around naked. But over the music I could hear some of them commenting not on my bare body, but how toned it was.
With a smirk I grasped at the sleeves of my top and flipped it over my head before tying them around my waist. I began to flex whatever I could; arms, abs, whatever, just to get the crowd going. Everything was just falling into place, it seemed.
But with all good things, they must come to an end. "Wonderful! Marvelous! Such passion! Such grace! Such… magicks!" Photo Finished seemed to have composed herself before making her way up to me. "You were astounding! I will be publishing these photos in my latest issue! And I would love to see more from your designer!"
"Thank you. I had a—Hurk!" The fashion pony wrapped her forelegs around me and hugged me hard before giving me a smooch on each cheek.
Oh, God. Now I'm getting kisses from these ponies now?
"No, it is I who should be thanking you!"
"Well, if you say so. I should—" I went dead silent. My face went straight. My eyes widened as I gazed across the crowd and saw two faces that I instantly recognized. Who would forget those white and lavender furs and those purple and violet manes. Oh, and the scowling expressions too. That also stands out. "… Ah, smeg."
"Summers!" a shrill voice shrieked out from the crowd. Guess Rarity was still angry at me. "You still owe Fluttershy an apology!"
"And you still owe me a friendship cuddle!" And Twilight too.
"AND YOU OWE US NEW WINDOWS!"
Oh yeah. They're super mad. That's my cue to make a run for it. I leapt from the edge of the catwalk, making the ponies below me scurry out of the way and leaving me a path to tumble through, rolling to my feet before making a run for it. From behind I could hear the galloping of hooves as Rarity and Twilight bolted after me in hot pursuit.
People say the running of the bulls is terrifying, but I think the running of the two angry magic-wielding ponies is heart attack-inducing.
"Get back here!" Twilight called out to me. "You can't run forever!"
I'm more than happy enough to try and prove them wrong.