//------------------------------// // Noooooooooooo- // Story: ASDF movies visits Equestria // by CosmicAfro //------------------------------// Pinkie was bouncing around her own kitchen at her apartment, listening to humms and dings of various utilities and machines and taking the appropriate actions when something went off. “Thanks for helping me bake this cake, Twilight! I really appreciate it!” The unicorn had no issues with being modest. “It’s no problem, Pinkie. After yesterday’s train wreck-“ “Train wreck! I get it!” the baker giggled in response to the appropriately placed pun. She hadn’t even realized she made a pun, so she smiled and continued, “yeah, after yesterday, Spike and I were cleaning the library for at least two hours, and most of that was organizing the papers.” While whisking an egg, Pinkie replied, “So, what happened to that kid from yesterday anyways? He seemed to cause a lot of trouble. I mean, Celestia’s castle has train tracks running through it, Applejack has to buy a bunch of dirt for her fields, and Fluttershy is even more scared of anything mechanical in general.” “Oh, he shouldn’t be a problem. They’ve detained him and sent him back to the ASDF movie dimension.” Honestly surprised, the pink pony questioned, “you can really do that?” “Well, yeah. Portals open in Equestria all the time. But, more often than not, we get humans. They usually tell Celestia-awful stories and then leave.” “Well, fourth wall break aside, the cakes should be ready in about an hour. Can you do your magicy magic thing and enchant them to be real, living things?” “Why would you need that?” She approached the oven and looked at the rising yeast. “Well, the cakes are for Mr. and Mrs. Cake. Instead of thanking them with a lame card or a lame gift, I thought it would be so totally super neat if the cakes told the Cakes how thankful I was!” “Uhm… ok? It could work for my magic theorem I’ve been working on lately…” With a light of the horn and a casting of a spell, the baking confectionaries were enchanted. ___ A human, outlined in black and solid white for everything else, walked into Sugarcube Corner. There didn’t appear to be anyone there, not after he dinged the bell a few times and called out to them. It was truly an act of poor service. But, on the counter was a lone cake, decked with icing galore and two cupcakes on the side. There was a knife on the counter, so logically he assumed it was for the cake. “Umm, yum,” the human said, licking his cartoonish lips. He took the knife and held it over the cake for just a moment before going in for the first slice. Schlick! “Ahhhhh! Why would you do this!? I have a wife and family!” Horrified, he screamed, “Nooooooo!” “Oh the pain!” The cake dramatically screamed. “It’s unbearable!” “WHAT HAVE I DONE!” He stared at his hands, the tools of bloodfrosting shed. Hopping across the counter, the cake continued writhing in pain. “Tell my children I love them!” “Daddy!” the two cupcakes screamed! The cake, unwilling to live, jumped off the edge and plummeted to the floor. “Nooooooooooooooooo-“ “-ooooooooooooooooo-“ Splat. “Hey Twilight, what was that-” Pinkie emerged from the kitchen with headphones around her neck and a Mp3 blasting some dub-step song. “Oh dear… now you’ve done it,” Twilight spoke through a facehoof.