//------------------------------// // 5. The Funeral // Story: Case 109 // by Platinum Noir //------------------------------// “The Pie family?” I retorted, both frightened and relaxed. At some point they had to arrive at Ponyville; but now was not a good time. I did not want them to see me here, they couldn’t take it. “Yeah; I believe the whole family is out front.” Spike replied, repeating himself. Ash and some of the team had taken notice to the family and started to give their worried glances at me. “Spike, did they see you here?” I asked desperately. “Err, no. I noticed them before they got to me; they’re talking to the sheriff last time I checked.” He replied. I thought frantically, I can’t do this; not now. The looks on all their face’s and on her sisters, it was horrible. A familiar shivering feeling took over my body as I began to blink rapidly. “Let’s get out of here.” I said lowly. “What?” Spike spat, unsure of what to think. Ignoring him I turned to Ash, “Ash; we were never here. We’re at home grieving, and we wish not to be disturbed by anypony. Understood?” I demanded. Clearly floored by my words Ash gave me a dubious look, unsure what to say. “Do it Ash.” I declared, turning back towards the alley and started to trot out towards the back street. “Twilight! You’re acting on impulse! You can’t run from them forever!” He sprayed out, frantically. “Follow me and go home Spike; I’ll see you tomorrow at the funeral.” I refused to look at him as we broke into a run; but I could feel him shooting daggers at me with his glare next to me. “You’re not thinking.” He eventually said, clearly hurt. I said nothing, and continued down a small dirt path which would eventually lead to our little house enclave. Beat had given us a clearly confused look as we sprinted under the tape a moment ago but most likely brushed it off as one of our usual shenanigans. I couldn’t deal with the family right now; they’d just break my focus off the case. They'd surely want answers to questions I didn't know and reassurance I couldn't give. Reviewing what I had was the most important thing I could do now. As we neared our houses Spike broke away from me coldly and neared his door. “I don’t agree with this.” He claimed hoarsely. “I didn’t ask for your opinion.” I replied with a shallow tone. Clearly not bothered, Spike shut the door softly with one last cold frown. I sighed and entered my own house, and shuffled to my desk across the room. The desk showed signs of not being organized for such a strenuous amount of time; probably at least a week. And a massive amount of paper that littered the surface and surrounding floor only made for a more disastrous look to the office. The case was all that there was to think about; the Pie family would be fine. I tried to convince myself that they were weeping quietly and leaving my team alone; and defiantly not asking for me. My gaze shifted towards a box of cigarettes that laid on the edge of the desk; mostly full. Ponyliament Super Lights ‘a refreshing concoction of domestic tobacco.’ I could analyze the label all day, reading all the warning labels and whatnot. That idea actually held some water for a moment until I gave a half-hearted sigh and pushed them into a drawer with my magic. I thought about smoking one to relieve some of the monstrous stress I had endured but there was really no point. I found myself in the desk chair, suddenly leaning back in frustration and agony. I planted a hoof on the desk, the cool wood quickly warming to my touch. An outsider looking in saw a case that involved a brutal mix of law enforcement politics, relations, card stacking, and consequences. Brasshoof played me, and that made him almost as worse as what he was before I heard this information. This case should be in Federal hooves and he knew it, but he instead choose to put me at the center stage, showing me off to the entire division; promising a perfectly smooth case. But the most angering fact was that I was missing a piece, there had to be something more than me that was holding the Feds off from this case. Ash had given quite a plethora of information though, and all I would need was a bit more info until it was clear. I thought about telling all of this to Brasshoof as my eyes fell to the phone call box that laid on the other side of the desk. It was a charming thought no doubt, the feeling of vindication alone would be glorious, but it wouldn’t get me very far in the long-term. It was only the early afternoon, but my emotions had led me to believe it was midnight. It’d be simple to say that I felt like a darkness had taken over me, but I instead felt a certain thunderstorm was brewing up, starting to blow and thunder in the distance. It was clear sitting at the desk wasn’t going to motivate me to work; so my bed was my next best choice. My mind wandered to wherever it pleased, mostly about the same things it thought about last night. The afternoon hours bled by, rather quickly to my surprise. Spike didn’t dare attempt to knock on my door as the sun eventually set. I tried not to think about sleeping, hoping to create a reverse psychology into sleeping at first; which didn’t work. Liquor was the next best option; but I knew with the funeral tomorrow; that was the last thing I needed. The third option at this point was to give up and try and find something to do for the entire night; which normally led to either a book or sifting through old case files. I was once again staring; this time at my front door as I waited for Spike to walk out of his house. For obvious reasons I didn’t want to seem like I was waiting outside first due to another sleepless night. ‘Presentable’ was really the only word that could describe me today; which was a clear upgrade from the last four days. A simple black dress would do for today’s event, simple and straight-forward. I didn’t bother to focus too much on the rest of my look, other than to fix my bangs and bathe; accidentally in that order. After shoving an energy pill down my throat in hopes it'd help my eye bags and pale color; I was back in my office, waiting on Spike. Spike eventually appeared, wearing a black suit with a thin dark green tie, that was neatly tucked in. I decided to finally walk out after a moment of him peering around the road. He nodded at me as I approached him slowly. “Ready?” He asked; a loaded question to say the least. After a moment of silence he trudged ahead towards the town. “Twilight, I’ve been feuding whether to go over this with you; but you know who’s attending right?” He asked eventually as we neared Ponyville. I winced at his tone as I immediately understood what he said. “All three princesses, your brother and your parents, a good three-fourths of Ponyville, the Pie family, and a lot of our friend’s families.” He choked out, as he winced for my response. “They didn’t want to talk to me, so they talked to you; didn’t they?” I immediately queried; knowing I was right. Spike quickly gave me a disbelieving look “How’d you know? I was going to tell you.” He retorted, clearly confused. “I’m a detective.” I simply replied; dryly. Spike shook off the claim, dismantled but not disheartened. “I have asked that they do not ask about the case or the investigation. They said they would all try, but a lot of them are rather upset.” “Obviously; look I’ll handle it.” I claimed. “Okay, sorry for looking out for you Ms. Heartless. And you’re welcome for my services of handling all of their frantic calls and demands to speak with you.” He replied, pouring every ounce of his sarcasm and hatred into each word; all-the-while scowling at me. “Your mother is especially pissed off with your withdrawal.” He continued. “It’s not withdrawal, I just wanted to be alone for a few days and grieve to myself. What the hay? Is that so hard to ask!?” I complained. Spike stared “I guess so. You know, if you actually grieved, maybe I'd be less pissed.” He spat. I shook my head in dismay as Spike finally dropped the argument. The streets were mostly empty, as I had predicted but feared. After several minutes of slow walking to the funeral home, which was located at the outskirts of town. The funeral home was coming up to our immediate right as I stopped to see the small gathering of ponies outside. They were mostly either smoking or making small talk as they waited for others. There would usually be a few hours of talking and remembering Pinkie until some words were said by family and friends. After that, a normal funeral would end with putting the casket in the ground after a slow succession to the graveyard. But Pinkie’s body was not resting in a coffin; it was instead sitting a super cooled chamber being torn apart by doctors in search of evidence pertaining to a certain Regional case. I didn’t really know what the Pie family had planned exactly, but I was to assume it was the best they could do with the circumstances. But I did know if a certain amount of suspects were captured in a case; the Regional and Federal authorities have the authority to hold onto a body for a certain amount of time before surrendering it to the family. So I was to assume this funeral would be closed casket and would not involve a succession after words. As we approached I noticed two Royal Guards scanning those who walked inside; with eagle-like eyes, including us as we passed. They were most likely commissioned to Celestia and Luna for the afternoon, even though I doubted they had arrived yet; or more-so 'hoped.' I expected murmurs from the ponies that were passed, but none yet. “Afternoon miss. Name please?” A kind turquoise stallion asked me as I neared a small check-in desk. The small funeral home only contained two rooms on each side of the dimly lit, dark hallway. The woodwork was actually quite beautiful and the fixtures were rather modern. A couple other ponies dotted the hall, mostly crying or otherwise chatting quietly. Both rooms had funerals going on, I was to assume the much larger one was Pinkie’s. “Twilight Sparkle, and Spike.” I answered. “This room on my right; sorry for your loss.” He motioned, after expertly flipping through a small handbook in front of him. Spike removed his coat and gave it to the helper pony behind the turquoise one and moved in behind me. The room was filled with ponies, many familiar, chatting quietly or grieving to mourn the loss of Pinkie. Normally at a function similar to this one; just like anypony else, I’d try to find someone I knew. It was the classic story of ‘I sort of knew this pony so I figured I should go but I won’t really know anypony. This time it was more about the opposite; avoiding basically anypony that Spike had mentioned before. This was an impossible feat; however I could try for as long it would take. But I failed seconds in as a certain white unicorn noticed me almost immediately. “Oh he was waiting for you.” Spike whispered, agreeing with my thoughts. “Twily.” Shining Armor simply stated as he hugged me intensely. His brute strength could easily crush many ponies with the force he exerted on me quite suddenly. His warm coat pressed against me tightly as he laid his heavy head on my shoulder. Time seemed to stand still for a moment as my brother’s embrace warmed me against the chilled, crisp air. It felt like a hint of forgiveness almost. But ‘forgive’ was a word that was no longer quite in my vocabulary. “Hey there big brother.” I replied awkwardly. His hug eventually broke as he and Spike exchanged an odd hoof-claw shake. “Are you okay?” He asked, in a lower than usual tone. “I am; I think I really am.” I claimed, nodding my head in an assuring motion. “You know this case, I can really handle it; along with Spike here.” I continued, trying to instill as much bravado and assurance as I could to my voice. Shining’s eyes grew a bit “Ah I see, I’m happy you’ve come to terms with it.” He announced, rubbing the back of his neck. Very nicely done; I silently applauded myself sarcastically. Spike just told me how hard he worked to get everypony to not mention the case and I have to go out and blurt it out as soon as I see my BBBFF. “It’s great to see you.” I quickly offered, trying to avoid a cue of silence. “Likewise, I usually assume you’re busy or something.” He said, voice trailing off. I stared out at the assorted dark colored suits and dresses other ponies wore, idly chatting or weeping in their own clusters dotted around the room. I was hoping to send a message to Shining that read something like ‘please go away’ or something along those lines. He must've noticed how distant I'm talking, at least I hoped so. “There’s someponies that really would like to see you right now. I was actually just speaking with them, sooooo if you don’t mind.” Shining exclaimed, motioning a group near us to me. Clearly not understanding my body language “Shining, please not right now!” I whispered loudly. I motioned for Spike to try and stop him but he just stood their raising an eyebrow at me. Much to my dismay it was in-fact the Pie family that was called upon by my brother. They all wore similar attire and had equally as sad faces, clearly wet from many tears. Suddenly, I felt a sudden blow to my heart and a breathtakingly cold chill that waved and vibrated throughout my body. It was obvious, even if Pinkie Pie would never admit that her family had a slight disconnection with her. After all, being an extravagant party planner who moved away from the long-time family home of rock-farming wasn’t something any family would take lightly. I had always assumed Pinkie’s parents thought of her moving away as the sort of ‘opposite of adoption’. The kind of thing where your child un-adopts your way of life and family by rejecting your lifestyle, moving away, and doing something completely unheard of and different. And then the family moves on, assuming you were a lost cause that only merited an occasional letter or stop by. However, I didn’t dare speculate if they still loved her, even before seeing their faces just now. This was all with the exception of Maud Pie however, who’d taken joy with being with Pinkie a lot; and us for that matter. But now, just by the look on their faces, even Igneous’ sad and desperate one, told a completely different story. I felt my breathing heavily increase and my heart desperately incline in pace. Time stood still for moments it seemed, minutes, hours even. I was suddenly cold, freezing almost as it hit me. Pinkie Pie is dead. In a trance almost, just as Maud was about to offer a hug; I broke into a sprint out the door, violently shoving certain ponies out of the way. Tears jerked off into the wind as I burst through the door, running home. “Twilight, what in the damn world!?” Spike demanded, temporarily keeping up with my adrenaline filled pace as he burst out of the home trying to catch-up with me. “I know what I’m doing…for once.” I said fiercely, lowering my head in hopes of channeling more speed. Ponyville quickly came and went as my blurred vision only captured the looks of a couple of ponies looking rather confused. Keep running, run dammit. Eventually my house was somewhere in my peripheral vision as I slowed my sprint. I barged in with little effort, my weight and momentum doing most of the work on the door. The move reminded me of my younger years, barging into crime scenes looking for suspects or fugitives on the vice squad; a rather short-lived escapade. Nearing the call-box on my cluttered desk I jammed my hoof on the ‘call’ button and waited for the Regional PD internal dispatcher; Wave Scanner to most surely take the call. “Regional PD of the Greater Metropolitan; name and badge number?” She asked shrilly. “Twilight Sparkle; S49021. I need to route a call, Wave.” I asked vehemently, clearly showing my impatience. At the end of my statement, Spike burst through my front door; Shining in tow. “What the absolute fuck!?” Spike asked violently; showcasing a rare curse word he used. “If I don’t do this now, I will regret it.” I growled, fiercely. Spike was never afraid of me; he’d seen all of my moods eighteen different times throughout our career. But this time I tried to make it seem like this was different, a different brand of anger. “Who to Twi?” Wave asked idly; clearly trying not to seem like she’d heard the ensuing argument. “Federal Agent Platinum; he’s an Equestrian Homeland Marshall.” I declared, as Shining’s eyes narrowed. “Need his badge I.D.?” I asked quickly. “Nah, routing it now.” Wave said as she signed off with a click. “Why the hay are you calling a Federal Marshall?” Spike asked, with a hint of defeat in his tone. Tears once again began to trickle slowly down my eyes. “I want to do this alone.” I announced. “That doesn’t answer his question.” Shining countered. Shining veered some confidence as he approached me. “Get. Out.” I growled; gritting my teeth as my horn started to glow. “You won’t hurt your brother or your partner.” Shining accused, softly as he motioned to Spike. Spike folded his arms in agreement as his eyes met mine. “Federal Agent Platinum.” A proud and tired voice broke the tense standoff just in time. All three of us silently stared at the box for a quick moment until I finally managed a word. “Platinum, I need a favor. I’ll make it short.” I said, trying to mask my upset tone; which didn’t work well as certain words rolled together to create a strange dynamic. Just as Platinum was about to respond I interrupted him “Put case H-6109 under Federal control, I’m the lead investigator and I need you to take it over.” “Is that the-“ “Yes, it’s the goddamn Pinkie Pie murder case. Put it under your control.” I demanded. “You know you owe me Twilight. But I also need-” He responded just as I clicked the call off with a quick burst of magic as my breathing settled a bit. I didn’t break my stare from the box for minutes as the tears once again returned for a more permanent episode. It’d take almost fifteen minutes to realize that Spike had walked out, but that my brother was still in the same spot where he’d stopped before I started talking to Platinum.