Trixie Drives You Insane

by Fantastic Fantasies


Star Bucks and Talks

'The Great and Humble Trixie requires food to appease her stomach!' The small voice in the back of your head shouted as you were trying to think of what to order. You wish you could just tell her to shut up every once in a while without seeming like a nut job. Yeah, she could reply with you through your thoughts, yet you couldn't do the same with her?! Where's the justice?!

"Yeah, I'd just like a black coffee," You told the Star Bucks employee.

'And a croissant!'

"And a croissant, please," You said, a slight edge to your voice. There were sometimes where you wanted to kill the little pest in your mind, but to do that you would have to kill both of you. Sometimes you did ponder this option, though.

"Can I get a name for the order?" The employee asked us.

"Yeah," You told him your name along with Trixie's. He looked at you with a look you couldn't quite place. It said something along the lines of 'Ok, you're a nut job, but if you give me a credit card that can pay for your order I don't care.' It was because you said 'and.' Sometimes they would write down 'and,' others they would think they heard it wrong and would write 'Anna.' You had grown to the point where you didn't care. Trixie on the other hand. . .

'If they get our name wrong again,' Trixie started her usual rant. Right on schedule. 'I swear to Celestia, I will unleash my full might upon them!'

You looked around and spotted the bathroom. You walked over to it, tuning out Trixie's little rants as usual. You jiggled the doorknob, seeing if your worst fears were true. Yep, they were. Locked. Ugh! Always when you need it, someone else takes it! You silently curse the person who is in that bathroom for a thousand years, along with their offspring. Ok, maybe that was a bit harsh. You only curse them and their pet.

'... Do these foals have any idea of whom they are dealing with?' Trixie shouted in your mind, causing you to wince slightly. 'I know the Princess of Friendship! She could send them all to Tartarus if I asked!'

You sighed, pulling out your phone. It was a regular thing for you to have to do if the bathrooms were occupied. You held it up to your ear and begin one of the lovely daily chats you'd often have with Trixie.

"Would you mind not bursting my eardrums?" You began as you walked out of the restaurant. You hoped this would only take a second or else they might throw away your food. Again.

'The Great and Humble Trixie does not know what you are talking about.'

"Trix, can you just shut up, for like, a minute?"

'Why would the Great Trixie be so cruel as to stop you from listening to her beautiful voice?'

"So I don't kill you! Is that a good enough reason for you?!"

'Please,' Trixie started, a snide tone in her voice. 'You have the easy part in our relationship. Meanwhile, I'm stuck being an observer of a life that's not my own when I fall asleep! Your life is much less complicated than mine!'

"Easy?!" You screamed, taking the phone from your ear and putting in your pocket. You didn't care who stopped to stare; You'd had enough. "You're ruining my life! I take the time to listen to to you, to heed your half-assed advice, yet when it's your turn to pilot the vessel you don't listen to my advice, thus getting yourself into situations that I had predicted from the very beginning! Easy?! If you think that dealing with you is easy, I'd hate to see your definition of hard!"

Trixie stayed silent. You kept waiting for some witty retort, but none came, just silence. You gulped, expecting to hear from her. She still said nothing.

"Trix?" You whispered. You bit your lip. It was not like Trixie to give up on an argument. In a weird way, it was her way of having fun.

You sighed, feeling like a jerk. Maybe you'd been too hard on her this time. You knew how taboo cursing was to her. You went back to the Star Bucks feeling guilt weighing heavily on your shoulders. You looked at the counter. Your order was ready.

You walked over to it, your frown only grew deeper as you read, 'Trixie.'


"Triiiiiiiix!" You whined, staring in the mirror. You were past desperate at this point to get a response out of her. "I've been saying that I rue the fact that I yelled at you for the past hour! Please, talk to me!"

No response.

"Trixie!" You groaned out. It was so unlike Trixie to have this level of resolve for not talking to you. You screamed out in frustration as you made your way to the hallway.

You needed Trixie to talk to you. In a weird way, Trixie was one of the few things keeping you sane, yet she was also one of the slowly eating away at your mental health. But, she mostly helped. In an annoying driving you out of your mind kind of way. You had always talked to yourself before Trixie, so it helped you to have someone to respond back in an odd, slightly disturbing way.

You opened the door to your room and flopped down onto the mattress.

"Trixie?" You muttered again, trying one last time. She stayed quiet. She had kept her mouth closed for an entire day. A feat you never thought she was capable of.

You sighed, turning on your back and staring at the ceiling. You started your nightly routine of counting the old, glow-in-the-dark stars on the ceiling. The person who had rented this place before must have put them up there, and you didn't have the heart or the lack of laziness to take them down. They had become a part of your everyday life.

Like, Trixie.

You once again sighed for what felt like that millionth time that night, mentally slapping yourself for thinking about her again. She was fine, she had to be, or you would both be dead.

When the incident happened, you figured out anything that happened to one body happened to the other one. So if you stubbed your toe, Trixie's body got a stubbed hoof as well. If Trixie's mane catches fire during one of her shows, bye-bye bangs. You learned to just to deal with it, occasionally dreading going back into your own bodies to see what the damage was.

But still, you couldn't help but worry for one of your only friends.

"Trixie," You whispered to yourself on the off chance that she was listening. "Please, talk to me. I just want to know if you're ok."

'But you hate me.'

"Trixie!" You cry out, instantly sitting up in your bed, wishing that you could see her instead of just hearing her. "What happened?! I thought you were dead, you moron!"

'The humble Trixie bets that made you real happy, didn't it?' She said in your mind as you heard light sobs coming from her. You just then realize what was going on in her head.

"Trix, I would never want you dead!" You shout, pointing a finger at what you realize is thin air. You quickly turn your hand at yourself and hopefully Trixie. You take a deep breath as you try to organize your thoughts. "Trixie, you an annoying prick. Under normal circumstances, I would have never picked you to be my best friend. But I'm glad that they weren't normal circumstances. You are my best friend. And I wouldn't trade you for anything. Would it be nice if you would stay quiet for a few minutes when I ask? Totally. But an entire day is way too much time without 'The Great and Awesome Trixie.'"

'Great and awesome? Oh, so The Great and Humble Trixie is awe inspiring to you now? Maybe she should stay quiet more often,' Joked Trixie, sounding much more cheerful than she had a few minutes. You could practically feel the happiness radiating off of her as you both broke out into laughter. It was nice to laugh after being worried for an entire afternoon worrying.

"Yeah, great and awesome," You said as you crawl under the covers. "It suits you to a 'T'."

'Thank you,' She said. 'The Great, Humble, and Awesome Trixie appreciates it.'

"Maybe tomorrow we can work on talking in first person."