Session 18.0 MtangaLion
Gilda picked up a red checker, spun it idly in her talons, then placed it back on the checkerboard. Twilight's castle balcony had a nice cool breeze this early in the morning, and an even better view. "So, Princess..."
Twilight pointed a hoof. "I saw you move that piece with your tail, Gilda. Put it back, please?"
Gilda's tail snaked onto the table again, sliding a black checker back into place. "What? I was just testing you!"
Twilight smirked. "Uh huh."
Gilda lifted a single talon and started to speak, then hesitated. "I just had a thought. When did you turn into Rarity?"
"Rarity?" Twilight looked herself over quickly, just in case she might have literally turned into Rarity and not noticed somehow. Stranger things had happened. "I'm afraid I don't quite follow."
"C'mon, you know! Anytime anybody has to go to Rarity's house to talk to her about anything... boom! Suddenly they're getting fitted for a dress!" The griffon shivered, feathers fluffing.
Twilight seemed doubtful. "You, in a dress?"
"I know! Gotta give her points for trying, though. She actually offered to sew me a leather jacket after that. Wicked awesome, right?" Gilda sighed. "I must be getting soft. I'd feel lousy, making her work with leather."
Twilight smiled. "So you *did* go to her shop for something!"
Gilda cringed a bit. "Uh, it was nothing! I needed a stuffed toy repaired... don't you dare laugh! I was just feeling sentimental, that's all."
"Hmm... this wouldn't happen to be a stuffed blue pegasus plush doll, would it?"
Gilda froze, claws scraping the chess table. "I'm gonna find out who spilled the beans on that, and then I'm gonna gut them like a..."
Twilight cleared her throat.
Gilda growled, fuming. "And then I'm going to tell them that breaking a friend's trust like that isn't very nice. Sheesh. Happy now, Princess?"
"Wrassling!" cried Pinkie Pie out of nowhere, pouncing Gilda, who squawked in surprise.
Twilight chuckled and shook her head, levitating the table and chessboard out of the way of all the roughhousing.
After they... wrassled each other to a standstill, Pinkie gave Gilda one more great big hug... er, hold. "Here's a cupcake for you, and one for you too, Twilight!" She put a frosted pink dessert on each side of the game board. "Don't be late for work, now!" Pinkie rose on her hind legs, fired a gas-powered grapple at a crystal tower, then used the grapple line to soar up and over the castle roof out of sight.
They kept playing for a while in silence, until Twilight picked up one of her kings and captured half of Gilda's remaining pieces in one go. Gilda gave her a look. "Okay, so... I have no idea what we were talking about."
"You were comparing me to Rarity?"
Gilda snapped her claws. "Right! If we want to talk to Rarity... dresses. If people want to talk to you, we have to play a game!"
Twilight flinched. "I'm not that bad, am I? Wait... you came here to chat with me and play a game... so you could talk about how you have to play a game to chat with me?"
Gilda flung up her claws. "No, no no... There was an actual point to all this, I swear. Come on, what was it..." She grumbled and pecked at a wing, racking her brains. "Aha! Got it!" The griffon grinned craftily, kneading her talons.
Twilight smiled and braced herself.
"So I was thinking... it's murder trying to get a date in this town."
Twilight gave her a sympathetic look. "No luck finding your gentlegriff caller?"
"Don't call him that," grumbled Gilda. "And no. Gone, pfft. Heck, I wouldn't have waited around either. You, though, you could fix all that!" Gilda leaned closer. "Just a few magic spells and bam, presto! Handsome griffs and colts everywhere!"
Twilight's wings drooped. "Uh huh."
Gilda blinked. "What? Why not?"
"I actually get requests like that pretty often," said Twilight, kneading her forehead. "Especially on Transformation Clinic Tuesdays."
"What... that's a thing? Seriously? Why didn't anybody tell me that was a thing?"
"I get asked that so often that I've developed a standard response." Twilight grinned. "And I have Discord to thank for it!"
"Discord?" squawked Gilda, getting her feathers all in a bunch before she remembered to lower her voice. "What did he do?"
Twilight chucked. "Picture this: Late one night, Rainbow Dash is flopped on a cloud near Sweet Apple Acres."
"I definitely can see that."
"She looks at the heavens and shouts, 'Just once, why can't I like a stallion who isn't taken already?' And you just don't shout things like that in Ponyville."
Gilda blinked. "Discord?"
"Because Discord might hear, yes! That's how she wound up spending a whole weekend as 'Rainbow Blitz.'"
Gilda snickered. "I'd pay good money to see that."
Twilight produced a photo album in a flash of purple magic, ran a hoof down an index, then opened the album and passed it to Gilda.
Gilda stared, and her wings sprang open, nearly knocking the table over. "Boreas! I mean, uh..." She combed her claws through her crest sheepishly. "Yeah, I guess I can see how mares would go for that."
Twilight grinned smugly. "What I'm getting at is, I won't turn other ponies into the griffon of your dreams against their will, and I can't create dream dates out of thin air. However! If *you* are volunteering to turn into a male griffon or even a colt for a day, that's well within my powers."
Gilda blinked. "Uh..."
"I'm sure you'd have no problems at all getting a hot date, although you might have some explaining to do when you turned back. I can even show you an image of how you'd look as a pegasus stallion, if you're curious."
Gilda gulped. "Oh, um... hey, look at the sun! I've gotta get to work. Which is a thing that I do now! Yep, those clawssants won't make themselves! Good talk, Princess!"
As the griffon grabbed her cupcake and flew away, Twilight went ahead and conjured the image for her own amusement. "Anytime, Gilda."
Session 18.1 Jarkes
During one of their sessions, Twilight heard a knock on the door. "Spike, could you get the door for me?"
"Of course!" Spike said, getting out of his seat and heading towards the door.
Starlight frowned. "You know, I still don't get why you have no staff whatsoever here. Doesn't it get difficult to maintain things here?"
Twilight blushed. "I'm... working on that, but it's a lot harder to find qualified ponies around here than you might think."
Just then, they both heard a familiar nasally voice. "So you're playing in here, then? Starlight wasn't kidding about every hall in here looking the same..."
"Sunburst?!" Starlight yelped, her voice suddenly going up a whole octave.
Trixie smirked. "Who's that? Your coltfriend?"
"HE IS NOT MY COLTFRIEND!" Starlight yelled... right as Spike and Sunburst walked in.
Silence.
Sunburst coughed. "Well, she's not lying... we are most definitely not in a relationship. But anyway, Princess Cadance gave me three weeks off, so I thought I'd come here to visit during that time. Starlight's told me quite a bit about your gaming sessions, so I wondered if maybe I could join in?"
"Well, I... I'm sure you could play some other games, but..." Starlight fidgeted. "Well, we've been doing this game for almost a couple months now. I don't think we can have a new player join in so far into it, especially if he's only going to be here a couple weeks..."
Twilight smiled. "Don't worry about it, Starlight. I'm sure there are some other games we can play, or perhaps we can make him a 'temporary party member.' You know, like how a lot of NRPGs have those temporary party members who are much stronger than the rest of the party at that point of the game but then they leave after a while?"
"Oh, yes... I'm sure we can work that out..." Starlight said.
"Before we do, though, I need to ask you to do something, Starlight," Sunburst said. He took a deep breath. "I want you... to punch me in the face."
"WHAT?!" Everypony in the room shouted.
"Why? Why would I do that?" Starlight asked, frowning.
"Well, I DID kind of abandon you immediately after getting my cutie mark, never bothered to contact you during all that time, and in a roundabout way, I guess you could kind of say I'm partially responsible for you pretty much losing it..." Sunburst replied. "So come on. Hit me with your best shot! Fire away!"
"No, I can't do that! I mean, maybe if this was BEFORE all that's happened I'd be more than willing but..." Starlight trailed off.
"Come on, just hit me!" Sunburst said, sounding a little bit too eager.
"No!"
"YOU CAN DO IT AS HARD AS YOU WANT!" Sunburst yelled.
Silence.
"Dude..." Pinkie Pie said. "Phrasing."
"...I don't get it," Spike said.
"Okay, this lover's quarrel has certainly been entertaining..." Trixie began.
"WE'RE NOT LOVERS!" Sunburst and Starlight both shouted, before they realized this and both blushed.
"Well, sorry, but can we just get back to the session already?" Trixie asked.
"Yeah, we'd... better do that," Twilight replied. "We can work out how to fit Sunburst into this later." Still, she wondered, Why would Cadance give Sunburst a full three weeks off? ...Wait, isn't Hearts and Hooves Day in three... damn it, Cadance, not again.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Back in the Crystal Empire, Shining Armor was looking at his wife with a half-annoyed expression. "Honey, are you shipping Flurry's Crystaller and that Starlight mare together?"
Cadance smiled. "Maybe."
Session 18.2 MtangaLion
Button Mash's cutie mark celebration took place in the same video arcade where he'd gotten his mark. No other location was seriously considered.
Maternity and Eight-Bit were both present, proudly offering greasy pizza and game tokens to the guests.
A lot of the colts and fillies were clustered around the "Whack-a-Blarg" machine. Once, the game had featured comically ugly plastic Diamond Dogs and changelings, but now there was a legal notice hanging on the wall, and made-up green aliens popped out of the holes to get smacked by foam rubber mallets.
"Ah still don't get it," said Apple Bloom. "You were just doing what ya like..."
Scootaloo buzzed her wings and hopped, bonking an alien on the top row. "And bam! A cutie mark, just like that?"
Sweetie Belle grumbled. "I had to tell him three times, and then he was like 'Oh, really? That's pretty cool, I guess.'"
Button Mash blushed deeply. That didn't stop him from twirling his mallet and bonking the next three aliens the moment they appeared, though.
"You do know," said Diamond Tiara, choosing her words with care, "that is how most colts and fillies get their marks? You three are... really something else." She turned her attention back to the pool table and knocked a ball into a pocket with a double-bank shot. "Yes!"
"What's it for?" asked Featherweight, in between big bites of pizza. "Playing games?"
"It's probably for designing games," said Silver Spoon. "You can't make a living playing games."
"Hoofball players do," pointed out Rumble, though he seemed a little doubtful as well.
"Perhaps it's for playing games in front of an audience," suggested Pipsqueak, "whilst making witty commentary and urging the viewers to give him as many hoofs up as possible!"
"It's kinda... all those things," said Apple Bloom.
Sweetie Belle nodded. "His talent is all things gaming. We checked twice."
Button grinned. "That makes it the best cutie mark ever! I'm like, the god of gaming!" The colt flexed, not at all impressively.
Maternity overheard that and smiled. "Well, the 'god of gaming' had better keep going to school and getting good grades on his homework, so he doesn't wind up grounded from the arcade."
"Aw, mom!!"
Session 18.3 Mooncalf99
"Okay, that didn't work," Starlight admitted. "Retreat! Retreat!"
"We've been retreating for the last five minutes," Trixie said. "Get with the program!"
"Just keep retreating," Starlight repeated.
By now, they had cleared away their minifigure battlefield and replaced it with a map of the pirate ship's interior, which was for absolutely no reason a maze of twisty passages. The original plan had been to use more minifigures to keep track of their positions, but Trixie had instead volunteered her skill at illusions, so currently a small but very detailed model of their jury-rigged roadster was making its way down a corridor.
Following the illusory ship were several simpler dots, firing beams. Mental note to self, Twilight thought, brush up on illusions. In fact, ask Trixie. She would probably love to help me, just so she can show me how much better she is at it.
"Well, I guess now we know how the captain got her name," Pinkie said. "Talk about curb-stomp battle. No offense, Ra."
"It's okay… I'm a talker, not a fighter…" Starlight muttered. Nonetheless, she felt a little bit slighted. If she didn't know better, she'd have suspected that Twilight didn't want to let her have an army of obedient servants, but that was just crazy. It wasn't like she'd let the power go to her head, like with Pinkie or Trixie.
"Left turn!" Rainbow yelled, and the ship made a left turn down another corridor. (She had insisted on driving due to her superior stats, even though Trixie argued that she was the one doing the illusion and should be the driver. Given that Bright Light had a Drive stat of one, though, she had to admit that she would just give Twilight an invitation to mess with them.) "Then a right! Can we block their shots somehow? Shields? Did I install some kind of shield defense during construction and then space out and forget about it?"
"That's reaching it a bit, isn't it?" Twilight remarked.
Rainbow shrugged. "Worth a try."
"I crawl over the saucer section and hang on with two arms and legs," Pinkie said. "Then I draw four of my special dark matter frying pans and try to deflect their shots."
Twilight paused. "Hang on. Where did you get frying pans made of dark matter?"
"I put them on our inventory list before we took off," Pinkie said like it was no big deal.
"Do you even know what dark matter is, Pinkie?" Twilight asked.
"Sure! I read about it in one of your books on space. It's matter and it's dark, and it's super dense so I figured it'd be great for cookware," Pinkie said. "Plus it's apparently really abundant, like five-sixths of the universe is made of it? So it's probably pretty cheap if you know the right aliens."
"...Okay," Twilight said after several moments. "If only because this seems to be encouraging you to study new things. Still, you have to make rolls to intercept the shots every round."
"Hey, I've cooked trickier meals," Pinkie said. "No problems. Remember the Truffle Nougat Surprise, Gilda?"
"We agreed not to talk about that," Gilda said.
"What happened with the Truffle Nougat Surprise?" Rainbow asked curiously.
"Absolutely nothing," Gilda hissed.
"Okay, you're pretty sure you've managed to shake off your pursuers for the time being," Twilight said. "However, you're now very lost inside the bowels of the ship."
"In a maze of twisty little passages, all alike?" Pinkie suggested.
"Very much so," Twilight said. "That's what you get for keeping a map without taking the third dimension into account."
"But you said we couldn't do time travel anymore!" Rainbow Dash protested.
"Um, Miss Dash?" Sunburst interjected. "I think you're referring to the fourth dimension. The third is typically--"
"Elevation, yeah yeah," Rainbow said, rolling her eyes. "I know. I'm a flying pro, you know. I was trying to be funny."
"Sorry…" Sunburst mumbled.
Starlight patted him on his shoulder. "Don't worry about it. Just… relax and don't be too serious, and you'll be fine. I'll admit, it was a surprise when I started living here - they're all business when the world needs saving, but…"
"Yes… yes, I understand." Sunburst stared at the character sheet the princess had drawn up for him, absorbing the information meticulously scribbled down there. This gaming thing was quite new, but he'd get the hang of it one way or another.
He tried not to get too overwhelmed by the fact that his character sheet was written by a princess, and thus counted as royal writ. Or that he was sitting next to said princess, who was sneaking bites from a hayburger while talking in a way that no royalty should admit to doing. Or that he'd just been told off by a legendary hero of Equestria. Or the… well, the whole complex situation with Starlight, which he still was coming to terms with. It was… wow. Just wow.
And yet they acted like this was nothing at all. Like they were just regular ponies having regular fun. They certainly didn't think they were that special. Sombra's breath, that blue unicorn talked as though Princess Twilight should defer to her instead. Which they seemed to find funny, rather than a massive breach of decorum. And the less said about the griffon's vocabulary, the better. Yikes!
But yes, he'd get the hang of it. He'd just have to… play along, as it were. And this character the prin… Twilight had given him, it would work well. He wanted to borrow an idea from a book he'd read, and this fit the bill nicely.
He became aware that Starlight was tapping him on the forehead. "Uh, what?"
"You spaced out for a bit," she said. "Are you feeling okay?"
"Just fine," he said reassuringly. "What's happening?"
"No, I don't think it's safe to hide the ship in your mouth," Trixie said to Pinkie Pie. "What if you digest it?"
"It's cool, it's cool," Pinkie said dismissively. "I stash things there all the time. I can be, you know, selective about it."
"And what else can we do?" Rainbow said. "You gonna carry it on your back? Last I knew, your Bod stat is way too poor for that."
"Ugh, fine," Trixie said, giving up. "But you'd better not drool on the seats." She grumbled a bit. "Okay. Now. Where are we, and is there anything interesting around?"
"Twisty passages, flickering lights, the piles of rubble and broken machinery that you leave behind whenever you land your ship anywhere," Twilight said. "After a little wandering, you find a large door with 'SECURITY' written over it."
"I look around for the security," Trixie said.
"You don't find any guards in the area, despite a thorough search," Twilight replied. "Whoever installed the door did a good enough job that it's secure enough. Titanium alloy, three-inch thick cylinders, and a twelve-sequence code lock. Just looking at it makes you feel safe and secure, knowing that such a paragon of security exists in the universe."
"Have you been drinking?" Trixie shook her head. "Never mind that. What's the melting point of titanium?"
Twilight laughed. "Nice try, but the door is thermally insulated to resist even your stellar heat. Care to try the lock?"
"No, I'd rather try the wall," Trixie said. "Is that made of heat-insulated alloy too, I wonder?"
Twilight glared at the unicorn. "No, it's not."
"Excellent!" Trixie cheered. "Then the Plasmatic and Radiant Bright Light cuts the door out of its frame and gains entry that way."
"Oh, nice variant of the 'Cutting the Goatian Knot' concept!" Sunburst remarked.
"Naturally," Trixie bragged. "Nopony thinks outside the box like Trixie."
"The code lock wouldn't have been that difficult," Twilight pointed out.
Trixie just shrugged. "Too obvious. Now, reveal the treasure of the pirates!"
"Wait, treasure?" Rainbow said. "Are you saying you found their loot?"
"Dude, I'm so there," Gilda said. "What, you thought you could sneak away and ninja all the cool stuff?"
"Girls, I'm pretty sure I did not 'sneak off' anywhere," Trixie said. "I just asked if there was anything interesting around."
"She just walked a few yards to the left," Twilight clarified. "She's been within eyesight the whole time."
"Also, how could she be a ninja when we're trying to be pirates?" Pinkie interjected with a grin.
Silence.
"Pinkie, what have we said about tired old memes?" Twilight asked.
"Sorry," Pinkie said, dejected.
"So, the treasure?" Trixie asked. "At least, I'm assuming it's treasure. Why else would you lock it up like this?"
"Okay, after some effort you manage to push away the broken security door and get inside," Twilight said. "The room is full of bags and boxes, as well as one chained-up stallion."
"Whoa, the pirates keep dudes as their treasure? That's awesome!" Gilda said.
"Well, since Captain Plasmabeard was a lady, apparently…" Pinkie said. "I guess she has good priorities."
"Okay, Sunburst," Twilight said. "This is your entry. Go ahead."
"Oh, right, right," Sunburst said. He cleared his throat. "Oh, praise the Builders! We're saved!"
"'We'?" Rainbow asked. "You royalty or something?"
"I push past them and get to the prisoner," Starlight said. "Don't worry, your highness. Your days of oppression at the hooves of the tyrant captain is at an end! After all, nopony could be held as property by another."
"You sure?" Trixie asked. "Because we'd let you have him as your share."
"I thank my saviors," Sunburst said. He cleared his throat again. "We are in your debt, ladies. If you could--"
"And sir," Rainbow said.
"--What?" Sunburst asked in surprise.
"My character's a dude, actually," Rainbow explained. "You didn't know, so I'm just mentioning it now."
"Okay then," Sunburst said. He wasn't entirely sure what to say about that.
"So what does the mystery stallion prince guy look like?" Pinkie asked. "Does he have big cinnamon buns on his head?"
"…What." Sunburst wasn't sure what to say about that, either.
"You know!" Pinkie said. "It's the standard look for captive royalty. And you were supposed to ask Ra if she's a bit too short to be a pirate, thus establishing yourself as somepony who's usually strong and independent despite being a prisoner, but you went a different route, I guess."
"Okay…" He sensibly decided he didn't need to know what she was talking about, after all. "Well, as Pri… um, Twilight said, I'm a stallion. A unicorn. Can I, uh, save the colors and details for later?"
"Sure, no prob," Pinkie said. She was fairly certain nopony else objected to that, anyway. "Just a question. Equestrian pony or funky cool alien pony?"
"Hmm… actually, I don't think I should tell you just yet," Sunburst said.
"Ooh!" Pinkie squealed. "A mystery surprise! That is so cool!"
"Twilight?" Trixie said. "While they gush over the new meat, Bright Light checks those boxes you mentioned before for something cool."
"Good thinking," Twilight said. The others seemed to have lapsed into some argument over why alien planets would have ponies, so they would be busy for a while.
"Okay, most of the boxes seem to be miscellaneous supplies. Mostly machine parts and plastic pirate parts."
"Ick," Trixie said. "I set the former aside, in case we need to repair things. The latter, not so much."
"Well, they need those in case they get hurt in fights," Twilight said. "The machine parts are really heavy, though. You can't carry all of them. However, in another crate, you find a bottle labeled 'psycho pserum'. Judging by the pictographs on the label, taking it will permanently increase your strength. You estimate that it would work on your physiology, and--"
"Pass," Trixie said quickly. "Anything else?"
"Are you sure, Trixie?" Twilight asked. "It will boost your Bod and Bonk by two each, and you are kind of hurting in that department…"
"Twilight." Trixie swallowed. "Twilight Sparkle. Let Trixie paint you a picture. You are offering me power. Power that Trixie has not earned in any way. With an undertone in its naming suggesting that it may very well turn out to be something far different, perhaps even malevolent? Doesn't this remind you of something from a past incident between the two of us? Something that is not pleasant to bring up again?"
"What? What are you…" Twilight's eyes widened, and she drew a sharp breath. "No, no, no! I would never… I don't… I would never tease you about that, Trixie!" By now, Twilight's face was deep red. "You have to believe me, Trixie, I… I swear, I don't…"
"Well, of course Trixie doesn't think you did it on purpose!" Trixie barked. "Sheesh, don't be an idiot, Sparkle."
"You don't?" Twilight asked nervously.
"If I…" Trixie paused. "If I so much as thought you would be the kind of pony to bring up traumatic events to taunt me with, I wouldn't be here. I've quit groups that turned out to be bad plenty of times already. Life's too short to game with jerks, you know? But you guys, and especially you, Sparkle… you really try your best to make the game fun for everypony. And that's… uh…"
Trixie realized that the rest of the table had fallen silent, and were looking at her with wide eyes.
She realized this just a second too late, as Pinkie landed on her and hugged her tight. "Aw, you do care after all, Trixie-Wixie-rhymes-with-Pixie! I was wondering when you'd admit that we're your friends!"
"Ow," Trixie grunted.
"Uh, pretty sure she's mentioned it earlier already, Pinkie," Rainbow said.
"Yeah, but that was the casual, off-hoofed kind of deal, not a heartfelt and meaningful admittance," Pinkie said. "Completely different thing."
"Sorry about that, Trixie," Twilight said with a sheepish grin. "But I'm very happy to hear that we're so important to you."
"That's wonderful," Trixie wheezed. "Now if you can remove the pink one before she collapse Trixie's ribcage, that would be even more wonderful."
Gilda just rolled her eyes, grabbed Pinkie by her tail, and yanked her loose. She dropped the bundle of pink fuzzy hyperactivity back in her seat before turning towards the GM. "Okay, so that doohickey? If the principled gasball doesn't want it, I'll take it."
"Really though, Trixie. Are you sure about that?" Twilight asked.
"Yes," Trixie said. "It's probably a bit silly, but ever since that… time… I've tried to stand on my own. Earn everything myself. Stuff like that."
"So can I have it?" Gilda asked.
"I guess that makes sense," Twilight admitted. "I'll remember that for later. But honestly, I just wanted to give you something useful."
"And would it have had strange side effects?" Trixie asked pointedly.
"Asking a question here, dudes," Gilda said impatiently.
"Okay, yes, it would have," Twilight admitted. "Why do you want the psycho pserum, Gilda? Your character is maxed out in those stats anyway."
"Pfft, I wasn't gonna use it," Gilda said. "I wanted to try to turn it into Awesome."
"Okay?" Twilight asked dubiously.
"It's what my people do with stuff," Gilda elaborated. "'Cept I was hatched prematurely--"
"Yeah, you told us your backstory before," Rainbow interjected.
"--But, you know, I wanna see if I can do it anyway. Okay?" Gilda finished.
"Oh, all right," Twilight said. "Roll Cool, add knacks. Tell me the result."
Gilda rolled quickly. "Uh… nine. Is that enough?"
"You hold the bottle in you talons and… strike a pose or something?" Twilight suggested. "When the awesomic glow subsides, you're holding what appears to be… a goofy-looking bobblehead."
Gilda blinked several times. "What."
"It is, however, made of pure awesomnium," Twilight finished.
"That's… huh." Gilda racked her mind for a few seconds. "Seriously, Rainbow. Are bobbleheads cool, or crap? I'm not sure."
"I guess if you go for the ironic retro thing? I think Rarity said something about that once…" Rainbow suggested.
"And this is the point where the pirates show up and start shooting again," Twilight said. "Which makes this a great place for a break."
"Wonderful," Trixie said. "Grab the loot, I can't carry it on my own!"
"And the new guy?" Pinkie asked.
"Yeah, him too," Trixie agreed after a moment's consideration.
"Is this a bad time to mention that I'm still chained to the floor?" Sunburst asked.
Session 18.4 Dragon-of-Twilght
"You know, I honestly never thought I'd find myself playing cards with a changeling." Shining Armor's cards floated in front of him as he considered his options. The Cutie Map had been commandeered by himself, the Ponyville changeling known as 'Kevin', Button Mash, and Octavia of all ponies.
"One finds themselves saying phrases like that quite often while in Ponyville, or so it seems, at least." Octavia glanced about at the cards already on the table and the ones between her hooves. "Though, I honestly never thought I'd be losing to such a young colt."
"Doing better than me," Shining grumbled, then sighed. "I tap 5 mana and play Cone of Flame." He rotated the necessary cards, then placed the sorcery on the table. "That's... 1 damage to Kevin, 2 to your Prized Unicorn, and 3 Button."
Kevin glanced at his cards for a moment. "Eh, I'll take it; I go to 9 life." He spun the d20 down one notch.
"My unicorn dies, but I pay 3 mana to regenerate it with Molting Snakeskin." Octavia tapped the necessary cards.
"And I go to 14," Button said as he spun down his own d20.
"Okay, I tap... 4 mana and 3 of my creatures to play Alicorn of the Masses." Shining turned a few more cards. "Has Convoke, and it's stats are equal to the number of creatures I control; so it's a 5/5 with flying."
"Too bad I Exiled your 'Everything has Haste' card three turns ago," Kevin smirked.
"Yeah yeah, just for that, I attack you with my Pegasus Scout." He tapped the card. "2 to you and you can't block Flying."
Kevin grumbled, but spun his d20 down to 7 anyway.
"I end my turn."
"I interrupt that to tap 6 mana and play Cloudthresher!" Button tapped his cards and placed his latest creature down. "Deal two damage to everything with flying and each player." He spun his counter down, as did everyone else.
Shining sighed. "That's basically my entire field gone and I only have 3 life left. That's it for me then."
Button smirked as his beanie's propeller spun. "Pretty much, yeah."
Kevin buzzed over in his seat. "Where do you get your cards?! I need to start shopping there!"
"My dad knows some ponies who make them and gets packs on occasion; plus, he takes me to all the pre-releases!"
"How come he never invites me along then?"
"He says you still owe him for some cards you lost before I was born."
Shining Armor blinked, then sulked in his seat. "He's never going to let me live that down..."
"To be fair, I don't take Vinyl for a similar reason."
"Anyway, it's my turn now." Button looked down at his cards, clapping his hooves together excitedly. "First, tap Rogue's Passage to make Cloudthresher unblockable and attack Kevin."
Kevin sighed, dropping his cards on the map. "And I'm only at 5, so that's it for me."
"Carnassid and Caller of the Pack both attack Octavia; and thanks to Myriad, I get to put a copy of Caller into play tapped and attacking since Shining's still alive."
"And even if I block, I'll still take too much damage to survive." Octavia set her cards down. "I'm out as well."
"And Arrogant Wurm finishes off Shining." Button jumped in his seat. "I win again! Yay!" The colt did an entirely awkward dance as he celebrated, the three adults (or young adults in Kevin's case), sighing in resignation.
"Five games in a row; by Cocoon's carapace, I'm glad we're not betting on this." Kevin pulled his cards up into a loose pile, shuffling them out of habit. "There's no way even that butt symbol makes the kid this good."
"Cutie Mark," Octavia corrected, "and you'd be surprised. They can have some unexpected effects."
"I'm sure 8-Bit gave him some pointers too." Shining levitated his cards over to his saddlebags, then pulled out a different set. "I'm going to try a different deck and see if that works. He can't keep winning the whole night... can he?"
Session 18.5 BrutalityInc
“So, Iron Will sent this to you?” Twilight asked, pointing to the box now resting on the Cutie Map.
Fluttershy nodded meekly, “Iron Will said in his letter that his seminar business is booming, and he has patched things up with his wife and son, all thanks to my suggestions. So he thought to send a gift as a sign of gratitude...”
“A board-game… Either that fellah is mighty well-informed as every-pony else of our current hobby, or this ‘ere is some Minotaur tradition we never heard of.” Applejack muttered snidely as she scrutinized the game-box. Its depiction of a bronze-helmeted and armoured minotaur with his sword ready and shield raised against an attacking hydra made it obvious that it was a fantasy RPG game set in a fantastical version of the Minotaur homeland, based on Minotauran Mythology.
“It’s a pity that we’re not exactly familiar with Minotaurs or their culture that much to begin with, darling, them being a rarity around these parts…” Rarity commented. Then, a thought occurred to her, and she turned to Spike, “Spike, could you be a dear and tell us what you read about the Minotaurs’ homeland?”
Spike was more than happy to obliged, flipping through the pages of a book while Twilight stared sternly at Rarity, who merely giggled. “The Minotaurs originally came from the Tauran Peninsula, which in the present day is a republic populated by Minotaurs, Griffons and Ponies. In the ancient past, however, it was a land divided by its rugged, mountainous terrain and raging seas. Minotaurs used to live in labrynth fortress cities that served as the hearts of their ancient city-states. Their acropolises have grandiose temples dedicated to their pantheon of deities, the Orosian Gods. Nearby, they have great theatres where famous plays of comedy and tragedies were performed, agons where contests of athletics and chariot racings are held, studios where artists painted potteries and carved statues, and great libraries where philosophers debate and conjecture on various fields of knowledge.”
“The Minotaurs were and still is a maritime people.” Twilight interjected with her own knowledge, “Their triremes and galleys sailed the seven seas, bringing their goods and high culture to much of the old world. The society of the Pegasi Tribe before Equestria mimicked that of the Minotaurs, and even today, we owed many things from the armour of our Royal Guards to the Equestrian Games were directly and indirectly inspired by ancient Minotaurs.”
“Outside civilization, I’ve heard that the Minotaur lands was where hydras, cockatrices, phoenixes, chimeras, a thousand other mystical beasties came from.” Fluttershy said, recalling her knowledge of animals while Rarity swooned at Spike’s description of Minotaur high culture. “Discord had mentioned how much he loved the place because of it, saying that it was even more chaotic than the Everfree at times with all these monsters running around, and so back during his reign in Equestria, he ‘imported’ many of those creatures and set them loose to ‘spice things up’… at the expense of other ponies, of course.”
“In addition to the Minotaurs, Griffons and Ponies, other races also live there; these include Centaurs, like Tirek; Gorgons, snake ponies who can turn other ponies to stone with a gaze; Harpies – creatures with torso and head of ponies but the wings, tails and talons of birds; and even many tribes of Giants – massive ponies who draw their strength from the earth.” Spike added, reading another book.
"Uh, those real or mythical?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"Yes," Spike said simply, then continued. “All in all, it’s kind of inevitable that Minotaur mythology would reflect the place where the Minotaurs lived, and Taura of myths was just as exotic a place, where demigods walk among mortals, where heroes battled monsters, where gods schemes and intrigues, and legends were forged either by cunning, or by the sword.”
“I like the sound of this game! I always wondered what it was like to be Metis on his adventures.” Rainbow Dash remarked, now more than eager to begin the game.
“Metis!” Twilight exclaimed, stunned, “You actually read the ‘Journey of Metis’, one of the greatest epic poems of the classical era?!”
“Well, yeah! It was mandatory reading for us Pegasi kids back in Cloudsdale high school. I actually got high marks writing an essay on it.” Rainbow Dash explained. Seeing the surprised expressions of her friends, she added, “What? Just because I’m a jock doesn’t mean I have no sense of taste. That, and it was the only part of Literature class that wasn’t boring.”
Rainbow Dash was slightly incensed when she saw the others groaning or shaking their heads in disbelief. Who do they think she was, an uncultured barbarian?
= = =
Just before the game got started proper, with a standard campaign which begins with the players investigating a string of the mysterious monster attacks in remote villages, the Mane Six took time to construct their heroic characters, or ‘Champions’ in the game’s terms. There were no strict classes, giving all the characters flexibility in their starting form and development.
Though as with Minotauran Mythology, where deities are active in the matters of the mortal world, association with the divine formed a large part in the Champions’ final build, granted as favours and boons from whomever gods the characters devote themselves to. Each player could have one patron deity whose portfolio would defined their character’s final build in terms of proficiencies and abilities, while a secondary deity could also be paid homage to for extra boons. A player could swap out any secondary deities whenever they want for accessing different perks, but switching the patron deity, while possible as the Mane Six later learnt, was considered inadvisable since it carries considerable downsides, notably having to be restart at level 1 for all abilities/powers gained, among other penalties.
“I chose Bellamos, the god of battle and violence for my patron deity. Gotta buddy-up with the embodiment of all fighters to have proficiency in all martial weapons and armor, and powers like the Aura of Courage and Frightful Presence” Rainbow Dash boasted, showing off her character, which all indications from the description and stats suggests a snarling, bloodthirsty griffon warrior, similar to the Warblade-class in O&O. Her starting weapon of choice were a pair of chained-blades, attached to her griffon by the avian tarsus. “Of course, my character also pay homage to Tachos, the god of messengers, for speed and dexterity bonuses and perks.”
“Kinda had seen that comin’.” Applejack said as she brought out hers, which described a minotaur hoplite soldier, with their archetypical circular ‘hoplon’ shield, a ‘doru’ spear and a ‘xiphos’ blade as his starting equipment. “Mah patron god is Thalasson, the king o’ em seas, earthquakes and mounts, which grants me proficiencies in spear and shield, as well as powers like indefinite underwater swimming, power to knock ‘em foes to the ground by ground-pounding mini-quakes, and use any creature as mounts, whether land, the air, or in the water with Special Mount. Mah homage tah Santor, the god of forges and volcanoes, would boost me with perks on strength, durability and weapons crafts.”
Twilight, as expected, made a character build of a Monoceros sorceress, a ‘magissa’, with her patron deity being Thelgossa, the goddess of sorcery, and her character paying homage to Ilios, the god of sunlight, music, medicine and prophecy, for powers of divination and healing. Of course, the word mage is derived from the Minotauran word for magic-users and magic, ‘magos’ and ‘magikos’. It surprised her how accurately the game has portrayed Minotauran magic, from what little she knew; her character's starting equipment comes with the choice of an enchanted wand or amulet as a catalyst for her spells and charms, which is divided into several kinds depending on delivery methods*, such as pharmakeia (Through substances and drugs), epodai (Through incantations), katadeseis (Through spell-binding objects like curse tablets), telete (Through mystery-rites) and Goeti (Through summoning or making pacts with spirits, nymphs, daemons and the dead). The rituals and rites included was to her a sign of the dedication the designers put into making the game feel like an adventure through a mythological past.
Twilight looked at Fluttershy, Rarity and Pinkie Pie, still writing up their characters based on the supplementary guides and core rulebook of the Minotaur RPG game. She muttered as she wondered, “I wonder what kind of characters they would come up with…?”
Session 18.6 Mooncalf99
Yes... yeees... this will definitely work. These look perfect. Ah think.
"Applejack."
Plenty o' little stick ones, a few circlies... don't need the squiggly ones. How's a mare supposed ta tell 'em apart?
"Applejack..."
That red dragon one's real pretty. None too overworked like the others. Gotta be worth a lot. Hope I can get another.
"Applejack!"
Applejack finally looked up at the pony trying to get her attention. "What? Ah'm tryin' ta make a strategy here, Trixie."
"Why do you have ten tiles, Applejack?" Trixie asked in an accusatory tone.
In the interest of context, Applejack had not planned on sitting in for a game of mahjong today. She had only dropped by the castle along with Apple Bloom to pick up some alchemical supplies, and had gotten roped into playing when Spike wanted some more practice from Trixie. (Trixie's implication that Applejack probably lacked the skill to play properly had cinched the deal.)
An' ah bet she only said that to lure me,, she thought darkly. Tha' sneaky unicorn. Why's she hangin' around Ponyville all the time, anywho? Doesn't she have a real job these days? Mus' be nice bein' a showpony, gettin' ta take vacations whenever ya like...
Not that Applejack really disliked the pony. She had a very short list for that (topped by a certain pair of scoundrel brothers, followed by some snooty Canterlot ponies, and - for reasons she refused to elaborate on - Bon Bon) and generally avoided grudges in general. Trixie was pleasant enough when she wasn't deliberately antagonizing you. But Applejack would be lying if she said they had a lot of common ground, and lying was sort of absolutely not something she was supposed to do, being the Element of Honesty and all.
On the other hoof, Trixie was the de facto authority on mahjong in Ponyville... a fact she definitely took pleasure from. In that smug way that just kept rubbing Applejack the wrong way.
"That's none a' yer beeswax, Trixie," Applejack replied. "They're mah tiles an' you should look at yer own an' not mine."
"Of course I'm looking at your tiles," Trixie said authoritatively. "A good part of the game is observing the other players - what they discard, how they arrange their tiles, where they discard from, where they're looking, how they react to the gameplay... everything and anything that will let you estimate what tiles the opponents are holding."
"Wow! You can do that?" Apple Bloom said, clearly impressed. The filly had taken to the game with her usual gusto; countless days of crusading had given her a knack for getting the hang of things quickly. Even if she now had her long-desired cutie mark, she still liked learning new things.
"But of course!" Trixie laughed. "For instance, Spike is waiting on a five-Pin or an eight-Pin to complete a Chow he's building up on the left side."
"H-hey!" Spike said, looking like a kid caught with his hoof in the cookie jar. "Don't tell them what I'm planning! Keep that stuff to yourself!" He coughed. "Besides, you don't know that for certain."
"Suuure," Trixie said with a smirk. "So. Applejack. Why do you have ten tiles?"
"Is that a problem?" Applejack asked back.
"Given that you're supposed to have thirteen, yes," Trixie said. "Are you hiding the others somewhere, hmm?"
"Oh, that," Applejack said. "Ah threw them away earlier. They didn't look good, anyway."
"Really," Trixie said flatly. "I'll humbly confess that I missed you doing that completely. Then again, it's hardly a legitimate cheating move since no sensible player would cripple themselves like that. Taking more tiles, sure, but fewer? That's just stupid."
"An' what's that supposed ta mean?" Applejack said, a bit cross.
"How do you plan to complete a full claw without enough tiles, hmm?" Trixie said. "You need a basic thirteen, and a fourteenth draw. Losing three is like cutting off your own hoof during a race. You're destroying your fundamental ability to win."
"...Really? That was important?" Applejack asked with a frown. "I didn't think--"
"Clearly, you did not," Trixie replied snarkily, not missing the chance for a taunt like that. "I thought you Apples were supposed to have super math skills. At least Apple Bloom gets it right, yes?" She smiled at the filly, who beamed proudly. "You, though... honestly, Applejack, I don't think I could make you a good player if I had a thousand years for it."
"Not with that kinda attitude you don't," Applejack said, rolling her eyes. Such hyperbole. Sometimes Trixie was a worse drama queen than Rarity.
"So what happens now?" Spike asked. He was a little annoyed to have the game disrupted, but he had to admit he was learning a few things anyway. "Can't she just draw three new tiles and keep playing?"
"Absolutely not," Trixie said. Her horn lit up, and all the tiles collapsed into the middle and shuffled around under her magic. "Applejack has committed Chombo, a gross and irreversible violation of game play, which means that this round is forfeit and must be started over. Also, she is to be penalized a Mangan - that is, four thousand points to each player, twice for the dealer."
"Whaaat?" Applejack protested. "That's sixteen thousand points! More than half of what ah have!"
"That's really steep, Trixie," Spike said. "I mean, it's not like she knew she was breaking the rules."
"Uncle always said that harsh penalties make for good lessons," Trixie replied. "But yes, the circumstances do call for leniency. So we'll waive the penalty this time. After all, we all have to start as beginners at first, yes?"
"Yeah, thanks, ah'm new at this, you don't haveta remind me," Applejack said. Once Trixie had finished shuffling the tiles, they set about stacking them into walls again. Applejack rather enjoyed that part, actually.
"Besides, nopony said anythin' when Trixie took four tiles," Apple Bloom pointed out.
Applejack's eyes went wide. "...Say *what*?"
Trixie grinned in an oddly proud way. "Oh, you noticed? I was surprised to get away with that."
"Yeah, she did that sleight-o'-hoof thing," Apple Bloom said. "She was gonna take one tile from tha wall, but instead she took four an' put three back. Real fast, too. Ah almost missed it."
"Wow, Trixie," Spike said. "You're calling out Applejack on her mistake when you pull that sort of thing yourself? Isn't that kind of low?"
"On the contrary, little hatchling," Trixie said. "Applejack made a mistake due to her poor understanding of the basic rules, which is something that needs to be addressed and corrected. I cheated deliberately and with full understanding of what I was doing."
"Splittin' hairs, Trixie," Applejack said gravely. "Cheatin's cheatin'. Apple Bloom, why didn't ya say somethin'?"
"Ah would've, but it happened so fast an' I wasn't sure ah had seen it right," Apple Bloom protested. "An' then you an' Spike started arguin', an' I kinda forgot."
"Don't beat yourself over it, Bloom," Trixie said with a smile. "Cheating is just yet another part of mahjong."
"What." Applejack didn't like the sound of that at all. "Yer sayin' cheatin's allowed?!"
"Well, of course not," Trixie said with yet another infuriatingly smug grin. "If you're caught cheating, you're penalized appropriately. But if you're not caught, who's to say you were ever cheating? Goes for all games, really. And since dear Apple Bloom never actually caught me red-hoofed and only accused me afterwards, who's to say it actually happened?"
"Hey, I wouldn't lie!" Apple Bloom protested. "An' you admitted it!"
"I could have been lying about admitting to it," Trixie pointed out. "Generally, even if you're found out later on, you're clear as long as you don't get caught on the spot. Otherwise matters just get too complicated. Why, some dragons even consider it a secondary game!"
"Really," Spike said. He imagined Mina pulling tricks like that, but it didn't seem right. She always was forthright, with him at least. Master Babylon, on the other hand... the ancient dragon probably knew more tricks than there were hairs on Winona's back. No wonder Trixie liked this game so much.
"Oh, yes," Trixie said. She smiled happily. "Trixie remembers Gou-Mou-Pai, the great white trickster of the shrouded mountains. He would often win with white dragons... very appropriate, when you think about it... and it often seemed improbable how often they ended up with him. Then, one day... after Trixie became known as Kokushi Muso... he shared the secret with her."
"An' what was the secret?" Apple Bloom asked, intrigued.
"Simple. He took a drawn tile, like so..." Trixie raised Spike's right arm with her hoof, and put a tile in his claws. "And then he rubbed his talon against the underside so hard the engraving came off! Presto! White dragon!"
"He scraped it off?!" Spike asked in shock.
"Didn't y'all say dragons play with diamond tiles?" Apple Bloom asked.
Spike looked at the tile. This set, a cheaper variant, had been made out of cloudy quartz from Pinkie's family's rock farm and engraved by Rarity. He supposed that he could do that... with a lot of practice... and risk crushing the tile in the process... and be seen by everypony else doing it. Doing that with diamonds, though? With the kind of ease it implied, to do it unnoticed? Not in a hundred years.
"Yeesh, that's extreme even fer cheatin'," Applejack remarked. "Did this Gummy Pie really wreck his pieces just ta win?"
"Gou-Mou-Pai," Trixie corrected. "A great, awe-inspiring white dragon. Not Pinkie's pet gator. And yes. I suppose he did go through a lot of spare tiles. He could afford it, I guess. Anyway, it's obviously a trick I can't use. Even if you didn't catch me doing it, all I'd get is one bruised hoof. Hmm, an earth pony might be strong enough to do it, I guess."
"On the other hoof, yer a whiz at illusions an' stuff," Applejack said. "So you could pull all sorts o' magic tricks."
"Yes, I could. The Great and Powerful Trixie could make the tiles look like anything she wanted, scoring winning claws all the time. Or she could hypnotize you all into playing poorly... though with Applejack, who could tell?" She grinned and stuck out her tongue at Applejack, who just grunted in annoyance. "Trixie could do anything she wanted, really. But where's the challenge in that?"
"Yeah, there's no fun in winnin' the easy way," Apple Bloom said. "Besides, if yer opponents find out ya cheat too unfairly..." She looked at Applejack. "Well, ya know what ah mean. Then nopony would play with ya."
Trixie chuckled. "What are they feeding you, Bloom? Smart cookies? That's exactly right on both accounts. Which is why the Cunning but Fair Trixie prefers to only rely on subtle gambits that aren't so obtrusive, or unmatchable. After all, anypony could master sleight-of-hoof with a little practice."
"An' if ah asked Trixie ta not use any 'gambits' at all, on account a' Applejack not wantin' ta play with a low-down cheater, rules about it be darned ta Tartarus?" Applejack asked.
Trixie looked at her. Then she smiled. "Then Trixie would have to agree to the conditions."
"Just like that?" Applejack asked.
"Just like that," Trixie affirmed. "You would be surprised the lengths Trixie will go for the few friends she has. Or perhaps you wouldn't be. Now, shall we play another round?"
Applejack blinked. "Uh... yeah." She looked a little flustered by Trixie's unexpected admission. "Yeah, that sounds good. I'll get the hang o' this in no time, you betcha."
Meanwhile, on a farm in the middle of nowhere...
"Father?" Marble Pie asked.
Igneous Rock lowered the Geologist's Almanac he was reading and put it aside so he could address his daughter. "Yes, daughter?"
Marble brushed aside her mane that kept falling over her eye. "Father, why do we have a crate of square-cut diamonds in the sub-basement?"
"Those are family heirlooms, Marble," Igneous said calmly. "Do leave them be."
"I haven't disturbed them, father," Marble said. "You've just never mentioned those before."
"Hmm... it must have slipped my mind." The family patriarch tapped his chin. "They once belonged to your great-great-great-great-great-grandfather, who left them with us in the event that we would fall on poor times and need some extra wealth. Of course, with this bountiful land of ours, we've never needed them."
"They're awfully beaten up," Marble observed. "I worried that Boulder had been roughhousing again."
"It's how they should be," Igneous said. "A strong spirit can mark even diamond. A good lesson our ancestor left us."
Marble smiled. "That's very poetic, father." She turned to walk away, then stopped. "Oh, and mother said to tell you that we'll be having shale soup tonight."
Igneous' stomach immediately growled, and he smiled softly. "I look forward to it."
Session 18.7 Alex Warlorn
"Nice of you join in Maud!" Princess Twilight greeted.
Maud Pie's face remained unresponsive. "Pinkie Pie asked me to."
Rainbow Dash whispered to Pinkie Pie. "Are you sure about this Pinkie? I mean, your sister doesn't seem the role playing type... at all."
"Oh Dashie! We're playing one of the Enchanted Comic book adventures remember? It'll be easy for Maud to get into the role!"
"Well, Buttons and Starlight are busy playing Bunnies and Borrow with Angel and Fluttershy, so we're short on players. So we're short on Saddle Rager. So an extra pair of hooves couldn't hurt." Twilight said, coming between the two.
"Twilight! Private chat!"
Maud Pie as usual remained unresponsive.
"Boulder wants to be my side kick." She said fiddling with the rock.
"Uh... not sure if the comic is... attuned to uh... rocks as players." Twilight said.
"I see," Maud Pie said in monotone.
Rarity kept a polite face. "Well Darling, I think it's wonderful you're willing to try new things."
Spike didn't want to think about how Maud's attitude would impact the comic book world. Still, he couldn't exactly ask Maud not to play now. Not after Pinkie Pie had gotten her to agree to visit for a one-off session at all!
But why, WHY DID THE COMIC have to keep making him be Humdrum?! Couldn't he be Saddle Rager this time?!
Zapped into the comic book world, the Power Ponies minus Saddle Rager stood on the roof top, wondering what the adventure hook would be this time.
"Wow Maud! Your costume is... is..."
'Rather underwhelming.' Rarity thought looking at it.
So why was Spike sweeting bullets at the sight of it?
Yellow suit. Red gloves. White cape. No symbol.
Spike pointed at Maud Pie shaking. "Maud!"
"Yes?" Maud said looking at her costume with no expression.
"YOU'RE... YOU'RE... YOU'RE-"
"POWER PONIES! YOUR TIME HAS COME!" Ultrot 3.0 landed on the roof top with them.
"That's the bad guy?" Maud asked.
Spike nervously nodded.
Matterhorn said, "Okay Team! Form up! Spike! What are Maud Pie's super-"
Maud Pie punched Ultrot over the horizon with one strike.
".... She's One Punch Mare... her power is... yeah... that..."
Ultrot 4.0 teleported in. "You may have caught me off guard last time Power Ponies, but with my new and improved-"
And Ultrot 4.0 went into orbit.
"I'm sorry... did I cut the adventure short?" One Punch Mare apologized.
"Uh... don't worry about it." Matterhorn said.
"That's kinda her thing, she defeats her enemies so quickly that other super heroes don't even know she's a big deal." Humdrum explained.
Ultrot 5.0 smashed up through the roof. "YOU DARE! YOU DARE! I WILL DESTROY YOU!"
"I get the feeling the comic doesn't like losing in ways it didn't intend." Zapp said.
"Starting with you Filisecond!" He pointed at Pinkie. And away Ultrot 5.0 went thanks to One Punch Mare.
"Sorry Pinkie Pie, I mean Filisecond, reaction." One Punch Mare apologized.
Matterhorn meanwhile was wondering how such an overpowered hero was allowed in what was supposed to be a group adventure.
Session 18.8 MtangaLion
Button Mash sat slumped at the Cutie Map table, sucking on the straw of his juice box even though he'd already finished it. "I can't believe I lost a game."
Sweetie Belle groaned, but she quickly put on a smile and hugged the colt. "Button, don't be like that. You lost a game of Ogrechess to Princess Twilight."
"He played her for over an hour, too," said Apple Bloom. "Ah didn't last ten minutes when Ah told her not to hold back."
"But..." Button looked over his shoulder at his D-Pad cutie mark. "I thought this meant I couldn't lose."
"Your cutie mark talent is being good at all kinds of games, not winning every time," said Scootaloo. "Besides, wouldn't never losing get... you know, boring?"
Button Mash froze. His propeller beanie actually stopped spinning for a moment. "Games... boring?!"
Apple Bloom nodded. "If ya never, ever lost no matter what, ponies might not even want to play games with ya any more."
Button clapped his hooves to his face. "Nooooooo!"
Twilight trotted back into the map room, tired out, but otherwise all smiles. "Take it from me. Losing means that you can set a new goal for yourself, to improve and do better next time."
Button blinked slowly. "That's a great idea! You have books on Ogrechess strategy, don't you, Princess Twilight?"
Twilight flinched. "Well yes, but..."
"Awesome!" He jumped out of Pinkie Pie's throne and galloped out the door. "Thanks, princess!"
Scootaloo tapped her chin with a hoof. "Is this where we're supposed to write a Dear Princess Celestia letter?"
"Twilight's the Princess of Friendship," pointed out Sweetie Belle. "Maybe friendship letters should go to her now."
"That's okay, girls," said Twilight, twitching a little. "I was right here. There's really no need..."
"But this wasn't a friendship problem," said Apple Bloom. "This was a cutie mark problem."
Sweetie blinked. "So... we should write a letter to ourselves? We're not princesses."
Scootaloo grinned. "But maybe if we work really hard and try all sorts of different things, we can become princesses!"
Twilight took a nervous step back. "Dear Princess Celestia... help..."
Session 18.9 MtangaLion
The Rainbooms' after school band practice was just winding down when the classroom door banged open, revealing a brown-skinned kid with a mop of red hair and a propeller beanie. "Sunset Shimmer!" Button Mash pointed a fist at her. "I challenge you to a game of Ogrechess!"
Sunset facepalmed. "Pony, right? Look, kid... in the human world, when you point dramatically and challenge someone, you're supposed to point with one finger. No, not that one..."
"I lost again!" whined Button Mash, sitting on a stool at Sugarcube Corner next to the human world's Sweetie Belle, who was sitting next to *her* Button Mash, who kept giving his other-dimensional twin jealous glares when he wasn't busy with his GameColt portable. Even the vanilla milkshake they'd bought pony Button wasn't cheering him up much.
"Maybe this'll help," said Sweetie, offering pony Button her own GameColt.
Button Mash grinned and started a game, but his ninja warrior kept lurching every which way, easily getting ganged up on and defeated. "I think this game is broken."
Human Button watched him, dumbfounded. "Why are you hitting it with your fist like that? Use your fingers."
"Huh!?" Pony Button laid a hand over the tiny control buttons, pressing each one in sequence with a fingertip. His ninja did a rising sun kick combo move. "WHOA..."
Button Mash galloped into Ponyville's sweets shop, nearly tipping over a tray of cookies that Bon-Bon was carrying, and skidding to a stop in front of Lyra. "Humans are amazing!" he exclaimed. "They have fingers!"
Lyra grinned. "I know, right? Want to see how I sneak in to use the mirror without Twilight finding out?"
"Do I!"
Session 18.10 Ardashir
"YOW!"
Rainbow Dash ducked, electrical sparks flying from her long scaly tail. The blast of Tartarean fire flew over her head, turning the stone wall behind her into smoldering ruin. Snarling, the lava dragon surged after her.
Behind it, Lord Cherufe, one of the escapees from Tartarus, hissed laughter. Crimson 'veins' showed trough the cracks in his shiny black, glassy outer 'skin' formed of the crust over his lava form.
"So, even when Flashfire brings some of her flunkies in to help her, I and my lavaspawn still prove victorious!" He spewed more lava into the air. The draconic heroes all about him scattered; infused with Lord Cherufe's necromantic power, it could even penetrate dragon scales. The spewed lava gathered itself together into yet another lavaspawn, which promptly flew after a massive pink-maned yellow dragonness and a purple-maned white one.
"Rarity!" A purple dragonness called to her. One of the lavaspawn charged her ad she breathed purple fire on it. The lavaspawn vanished -- only to reappear a hundred feet in the air. Lacking wings, it slammed into the ground, splattering back into the molten stone that formed it. Which spread more destruction, and pain, as it ran under the purple dragon's claws. "OW! Rarity, use your ice breath!"
"Wha-a-at?" Rarity, the white dragon, started. She ducked a swing from 'her' lavaspawn. "Y-you mean... SPIT at it? Like some uncouth ruffian!"
Before she could say any more, fire flashed between her and the lavaspawn, and a lovely brown-scaled pink-maned she-dragon appeared in a purple and yellow uniform.
"No," Flashfire said. "She means, like a dragon -- like THIS!" Flashfire lived up to her sacred trust as the bearer of all of Tiamat's powers by spraying the onrushing construct with her frigid breath. It shuddered to a halt, reduced to lifeless stone.
Nearby, two earth dragons (with noticeably smaller wings) watched in amusement as Flashfire rallied their fellows against Lord Cherufe, sending him fleeing to join his fellow escapees from Tartarus.
"Ah tell ya, Pinkie," Applejack, currently a golden-scaled dragon, said. "When Spike an' his new friend Mina asked us if we wanted ta try out that new magic dragon comic, Ah never thought it'd be quite this much fun. Whoops!" She sprayed her own breath weapon at one more lavaspawn, hitting him with hypersonic wood splinters.
"Yeah," Pinkie, now a bouncy pink-scaled dragon aid as she lashed her tail against the ground, sending earth tremors shaking under Cherufe's flunkies, "but I wish Spike got to enjoy being Flashfire's boyfriend a little more."
Behind them was Spike... hanging upside down from chains set over a pit filled with Cherufe's necromantic lava, and with a surly look on his face.
"'You can be Flashfire's boyfriend', she said. 'You're half the reasons she goes on adventures', Mina said. Yeah, because she has to SAVE HIM EVERY TIME!"
Session 18.11 Zaku789
"Technically it's only in the early comics, and again sorry about not realizing they were releasing them in chronological order, huge oversight on my part," Mina said.
"It's okay," Spike said "While admittedly annoying, it's not as bad as certain stuff... plus at least I got to kick butt before they captured me."
"Yeah, you really hurt Cherufe with that jawbr-" Pinkie began to say but was interrupted as the convict snapped,
"That was a lucky shot! Lavaspawn, double the attack on the pink one."
"Okay now you're just being petty."