It's A Human Thing
"Eerrrrmmm, let's see..... no gems, dragon took them, plenty of charred bones, which we have no use for, all their stuff is dented, slashed, or burned, so we could use it for scrap and melt it down..... well, that didn't pay off too well." We tried to salvage what we could, but there wasn't much. The dragon that torched the place destroyed just about everything, and took anything of value that survived. It's clear they were caught off guard. Still, we got some scrap metal for the Freuds to use. Incidentally, they had finished setting up their workshop in a large vacant area adjacent to Steelhorn's forge. Having so many empty spots was a kind of realization for me. We were basically running on a skeleton crew. We needed to expand our numbers. Big time, right about triple. That meant hitting a big target.
"Masonry." Etch and Growl replied in unison.
"It's big. They have LOTS of slaves, gems, airships, gear, everything. It's heavily defended against dragon attack, so, while we may have a problem assaulting it, at least they don't have scaly backup. The fact that they have many slaves, many diamond dogs from other packs, means that when we attack, we can expect help from inside. The mines are below, but the city itself is above ground. They carved out a mountain, and over the years dug the top of it right off, so now the city sits on top. I suggest, instead of assaulting the city itself, raiding it's trade ships." Etch explained. Surprising, he's actually a pretty good strategist when it comes to his own kind.
"Sounds good. Cut off their supply, draw them out into open conflict instead of attrition. Basically, ACTUAL piracy. About time we lived up to the namesake. Maybe get a few extra airships which we can send to the settlement to serve as trade vessels. We're building an entire culture here, and what better than maritime, considering we're griffins? I like it. How do you know so much about this place?"
His eyes shifted side to side.... then he looked down, as if he was ashamed to say it, then finally, resolved to tell me. He looked me straight in the eye.
"They are our old enemies. We were coming up with ways to fight them for years. We lost. This is where we were taken as slaves. This is where my wife and pup are." I can see why he didn't want to tell me about that.
"So, basically, you didn't really want to tell me that fact because you thought I'd think you were just trying to save your family?" He nodded and whimpered.
"Hey, just cuz I didn't have a family before you guys doesn't mean I don't know how important it is. You miss them. You want to be able to see them again, to hold them in your arms. So, you have your own reason for doing this, it fits my motives, we both benefit. That's the whole point. We're all in this for one reason or another. From the way you spoke of them, I knew you were in this crew to save your family. Gilda's here to find hers. We're all in this for ourselves, and are working together because it gets us what we all want." His tail wagged as I pat him on the back in a man-hug.
"It's just, if I see them again, if they're safe. I can't guarantee I'll stay with the crew. All I've ever wanted was to be with them again, and have a normal life. Once I have them back, I don't think I'd be able to risk losing them again."
"Hey, we'll deal with that when we get there. After all, the point is, anyone here can leave whenever they want. We're a crew, a family, and we always will be, and sometimes, families split up, they move away, go off on their own. As long as they do it on good terms, then that's fine. Honestly, I can't say I'm surprised. You're here to get your family back, and once you do, not only will you not have a reason to stay on board, but you'll have almost eight years of catching up to do. If you decide to go, then you do. It's your choice, I won't stop you. Just know that, when it happens, you'll always be welcome on my ship."
"MAH Ship." Steelhorn bellowed in correction.
"Can't you see we're having a moment?!" I shot the minotaur a nasty glare, causing him to back down. He sheepishly dug his hoof into the ground, before absentmindedly polishing his horn. That's right, I can scare a full grown minotaur.
"Anyway, no matter what, you're one of us. If you go, write us once in a while kay? You'll have plenty of new tricks to teach those old dogs. My guess is you'll be pretty popular. Maybe hold some influence? Who knows. I hope you stay with us, I really do, but if you go, then you go, and we'll be thinking of you. Now, dry your eyes, it's time to man up. We have some plundering to do."
"Here we are. Masonry, right there, the mountain on the horizon. Ships coming to and from just about nonstop, trading with the other packs, Equestria itself, delivering slaves. We'll start little, hit some of the smaller ships. Once we figure out a good method of doing so, we'll move on the the larger ones. So, how do you think we should start? I want to raid them without them even knowing we were there until it's too late."
"Well, We're griffins." Gilda pointed out. "Can't we just cut a hole in the bottom of the ship, flood in from underneath, then fight our way onto the deck and take it that way?" They won't see us if we use the clouds for cover, and the last thing they'll expect is an attack from inside their own ship. We can fly, they can't. That'll be our advantage."
"Good thinking. I like it, but I think I can one up. The griffins bring their riders in, let them fight their way up from inside, while we attack the outside. Catch em in a pincer attack. They'll be boxed in and have nowhere to go. And they can't dig their way out of it either, since we're a mile up. Heck, the griffins can just throw them off the ship if they feel like it. Just make sure you don't shoot the ship itself. We want to use it later."
We hid the Possibility inside a cloud mass, then slowly drifted over the city, completely hidden. Using our incredible griffin vision, we spotted a group of three smaller ships all heading in the same direction. A transport and two smaller guard ships flanking it. None very well armed, so they probably didn't have very valuable cargo. That's alright. We wanted the ships. Anything else is just bonus. They looked kind of like blimps you might find at a sports event, except that they were made with wrought iron banding for the keel, supports, and balloon braces, and the drive shafts, and wood for the vessel itself and propeller spokes, with the same balloon cloth for the fins and propeller. It had a nice rustic stain on it, although was by no means classy. It was a working ship. The other two were the same, except had cannon ports.
"Alright. Three teams. Griffin and cat riders, split into two groups of ten. Group one, take the left flanker. Group two, take the right one. Approach from the outside so the other ship doesn't spot you cutting a hole in their hull. My team will take the transport. When you take a ship, rip the flag off it so we know. Ready to move out?"
"Yeaaaaah!"
"Alright. Let's do this."
The plan, well, it failed miserably. The timing was off. By a lot. The second team took their ship way before the first team, and the first ship noticed a griffin taking the flag off it's sister. They set off an alarm, the escort turned to engage, started shooting at the ship with my crew on it, and Tiras had to shoot it down. It crashed into the mountain. Most got out okay before it hit, as it fell pretty slowly, a few got minor burns from the flame, and one didn't get out in time before it crashed. We went to check and see if he was okay, but, when we got there...... it wasn't pretty. He had a mast where his head should have been. Rest in peace Tigger. His griffin, Reed, was crying afterwards. They had grown close, working alongside each other. He didn't take it too well that he lost his partner. This was the first death the crew had experienced. It wasn't in a titanic battle, it was in a simple raid gone wrong. What the hell? We fight an army of changelings and barely get hurt, but a measly little ship crashing kills one of us off. Sure, the cargo was better than we thought. A fair amount in gems, and we got the two other ships, but, losing one of our own really soured the mood.
"Damn. What happened?"
"We got careless is what." Trixie pointed out. "We didn't have any team communication. It took one team longer than the other to get through the hull, we should have a signal or something. A way of keeping in touch when in the field."
"I don't know what we can do about that, other than get some unicorns to pass messages around, except it can be bright or loud, that would just give us away." Gilda added.
"Gilda, you're a genius. Wait, Trixie, ponies don't have telephones or radios right?"
"No.... we send everything by mail, or, once in a while you get someone skilled in telepathy." She knew what telephones were, as I had explained a great deal of human technology to her. She likes listening to my rants.
"Well then, to Equestria! Although, how are we gonna convince them to join? We're an infamous band of pirates, I don't think they'll be too eager."
"Well, we could always do a performance or something." Trixie suggested.
"Of course. We go on tour. Do some shows to get public interest, then spread the message after each show. Get our names out there, get our point across. We've got the backing of the Equestrian government, now we need the ponies themselves. I mean, they're happy living their little lives, but I'm sure some of them are itching for adventure. We offer a life of excitement, getting to see the world, and then appeal to their good nature by telling them they'll be making a difference in the lives of those less fortunate. I'm sure we'll get some. We don't need many. Now.... what to do......"
Trixie, Gilda, Etch, Growl, Nadene, Maria, and the entire tribe, both cats and griffins, facepalmed.
"What? Did I say something weird?"
"I'm a walking light show, and you know a spell that lets you play fantastic music from your mind alone. Dumbass." Trixie smacked me upside the head.
"Sooooooo, rock concert?"
"DUH!"
Dear Princess Celestia,
Guess what? We're going on tour! For extremely complicated reasons which I won't bother explaining in this letter, we need unicorns. Volunteer only, we can't just go kidnapping can we................................... can we? No, I didn't think so. So, basically, we're going on tour around Equestria, we'll do some performances, get in the public eye, tell them about what we're doing. Hopefully we get some ponies to join up. They won't be fighting, just doing some on board stuff, like communication and organization, magic charges, stuff like that. It'll be fun! They'll be on a near indestructible ship, surrounded by burly tough guys sworn to protect them. It'll be like a working vacation. But yeah, we're coming, so set the table.
Do you like waffles, pancakes, and french toast?
Sincerely, Griffin.
Ps: All our songs will be pirated, but since I'm not on Earth any more, they can't sue me! *Evil laugh*
Also, we've had our first death...... it is a sad thing to experience. Poor Reed cried for days.
We cremated the cat, with the magic flame from my sword no less, then scattered his ashes in the ocean as a final send off. I kind of regret not knowing him better. Then again, I can't be best friends with every single one on board. I'm not Pinkie Pie. In fact, I'm generally unlikable. With the funeral finished, and the letter sent, I decided to pay the Freuds a visit. It's high time I freaked them out.
"Oh Gearzy, I have something to show you.........."
"Since he's been sending them more regularly, I figured I'd just hold onto them till we get an evening where we can read a bunch at the same time. He's been labeling them 'Urgent' if they're important, and one of them is, so, I guess we should read them, even though there's only two." Celestia sighed. She happened to like the quiet evenings with her sister, laughing at the antics of the famous pirate.
Dear Princess Luna
Do you have a special somepony?
Sincerely, Griffin and Gilda
Ps: Yes, we're together now.
"Alas, I do not. Immortals such as we are hard pressed to find one who we are enamored by, let alone is not simply trying to get close to us for influence. Even then, we know that they will pass long before we. It is lonely, living so long. At least I have a new pet. Noodles is just a darling."
"Well, I can't speak for your choice in pets sister. An anteater certainly is unorthodox, but at least it's not creepy. And it's still mortal. At least Philomina will never leave me."
"Caw!"
"Next letter...... oh my. They're going on tour? I'm not sure I approve of that...... I have no idea what his music is like.... I hope it's tasteful." Celestia cringed at the thought of the vulgar captain and crew singing in the various towns, especially after the performance at the bar. It was fine, their performance incited the ponies to drink far more than they should have, and the pub was busier and livelier than it had been in months. The sheer profits the bar made were more than enough for him to forgive the tab. It also became the talk of the town for a week afterwards. Taking Geirmund was another thing. She wasn't too fond of the fact that he lied to the guards, but, again, he's a pirate, and she did say she'd help him out in any way she could, so that was really just his way of bypassing the needing to ask her part. He knew she'd approve. The legal jargon he spilled was quite hilarious in it's own right, so she decided to play along.
"Sister, what does he mean by, 'Set the table?' It sounds like he's coming for dinner." Luna asked.
"It means he's telling us he'll be visiting Canterlot at some point. Despite being rowdy in a city of refinement, he's actually quite well liked. They're still singing 'Drink Till I Die.' in a number of the bars." Celestia explained.
"Canterlot has bars?" The younger sister asked, tilting her head. "As in, places they serve alcohol and greasy food? HERE?"
"Things have changed in the past thousand years. I keep forgetting that you missed most of it."
"Do I like waffles, pancakes, and french toast? Why, certainly. I know by now with the questions he sends by their style that this one is referencing something from his world. I really wish he'd tell me what."
"Oh, oh my. Well, that's rather somber. They lost one of their own....."
"Oh dear. Well, the fact that they are doing something dangerous, I'm actually surprised that it hasn't happened sooner, and at the same time, it doesn't make it any less painful. I know he treats them like the family he never had, my heart goes out to them, and Reed. It seems like he was especially close to whoever passed."
Dear Griffin Pirates,
Our most heartfelt condolences to you for your loss. I hope he finds peace in the afterlife.
Neither of us have a special somepony.
Gilda and Griffin, sitting in a tree, k-i-s-s-i-n-g.
Please keep the performance tasteful.
The bar tab was forgiven by the owner, and since trouble follows you wherever you go, perhaps Freud will get in trouble on YOUR ship instead of MY port. I'm glad you took him off our hooves. And cured his wife apparently? I'm quite happy about that.
Dear Spike,
Please give this to the seafoam green unicorn with the lyre cutie mark.
Thanks. Sorry for using you to forward my mail. Have a sapphire.
Sincerely, Griffin the pirate.
Ps: Shimmer wants to meet you.
"What am I? A mailbox? Uugh, now pirates are using me to send messages too. Although...... the sapphire... I am suddenly okay with this. Maybe I should write him a letter, Dear Griffin, send me more mail, (and gems).... Nah. I shouldn't be greedy, don't want a repeat of last time. Twilight, Who's Shimmer?"
"Oh, Spike, didn't you pay attention when I told you about our adventure? Shimmer is the dragon on board Griffin's ship. She's got blue scales that shine in the sun. She's a bit older than you, and I have to say, she's pretty cute." The unicorn replied. Spike blushed.
"And... she want to meet..... me?" He dug his toe into the ground.
"Yep. I think she might like you......" Just the thing he needs to get over Rarity. He was heart broken. At least they're still friends.
"Well well well, an older woman. Umm, I better go deliver this letter. Her place is just down the street right?"
"Yes, now go on you little rascal."
"Oh, hey Bon Bon, is Lyra in?"
"Yeah, it'll just be a minute..."
"Oh, no, that's okay, I'm just bringing a letter for her that I got."
"Did Derpy mess up again?"
"Well, It's a long story, just, give it to her okay?"
"Alright...."
"Letter for you, somehow Twilight got it."
"Ooh! Let me see!"
Dear Heartstrings, (or Lyra, if you prefer)
................... Humans.
Sincerely, one of them.
Ps: Please tell me I got the right unicorn. If not, this is gonna be way awkward.
Lyra swallowed hard. This had to be a joke right? Somepony playing a prank on her, messing with her obsession. Her eyes passed over each line in every letter, taking in all aspects of the note in front of her. Written too neatly to be done with hoof or mouth writing. Not rigid like magic writing, and not printed by a typewriter. No, this was written specially. She had seen things Spike had written before, and this looked like that, except done with more care. This note was not written by machine, nor by hoof, magic, or claw. This note was written....... by hand. It was real. What's more, the writer knew about her and that she had been researching them. The human knew her.
Every time she had been laughed at for believing in fairy tales, mocked for taking stories of human sightings seriously, they all flashed through her head, and all the times she had been called crazy, and started to believe it herself. She could laugh in the faces of everyone who had ever made fun of her obsessing over humans. But this wouldn't be enough. No, she wouldn't settle till she saw one, in the flesh. Right in front of her. She was sure if she could, the mysteries of the universe would unravel before her very eyes. Her pupils shrank to the size of pinpricks before opening all the way, her irises no longer visible. A smile grew on her face, ever wider, to the point that her head threatened to split in half. The excitement of such a thing was too much for a pony unused to adrenaline. Her eyes rolled up in her head, and she fainted on the spot, still wearing a smile.
Bon Bon sighed and put her in bed, not even wanting to know what happened to her roommate, considering all the weird things she was in to. That night, Lyra dreamed good dreams, dreams of the tall creatures that walked on two legs and had hands, and, most of all, she planned.
And JJ Malcom has done the impossible. Draw Hades correctly! SO HERE IT IS!