//------------------------------// // The Author IS NOT SORRY // Story: Waifu and Husbando Emporium // by Tyrannosaurus_Tux //------------------------------// This cave offered limited protection from the elements, if not sight. However, it didn’t help to hide in one if the thing chasing you saw you go into it. Twilight Sparkle called out with her angelic voice, “Are you still okay? I think you need help!” I grit my teeth. No, Twilight Sparkle’s voice was not smooth... and it would not be nice to feel her soft fur and silky mane as I took her into my arms. This... this was only a trick! I called out from behind my hidey-rock to the gorgeous pony at the cave entrance, “D-Don’t get any closer! We’ve... we’ve been cursed! Yeah!” This gave the beautiful Twilight Sparkle pause. She ever-inquisitively asked, “What kind of curse is it?” I took a few ragged breaths, noting my dry lips and the oncoming dehydration. Trying not to give away my position, I answered, “I... I-I don’t know how, but the effect seems to... get stronger the closer we are to each other. Can’t you feel it?” My breath seized. The incoming sounds of hooves clattering on stone could only mean one thing. ‘She’s getting closer.’ Time slowed to a crawl, and my heart raced ever faster, as if a predator were nearing my position, waiting to pounce on me and eat my bones. The absurdity of the situation gave me reason enough to think for a moment that the goddess of books and beauty was a predator, trying to jump my... bones. A quick purge of the rogue thoughts later, and I reoriented my attention back to the situation. My inattentiveness meant that TWILIGHT SPARKLE WAS NOW ON TOP OF MY POSITION, with her wings to her side slightly in a show of nervousness. Her face, perfectly framed by the afternoon light coming in from outside, was unreadable. She said, “I don’t feel anything.” I shrieked and ran further into the cave. Twilight Sparkle, in alarm, cried out a warning of some kind. I paid no heed, because I just had to get away from that horse, and not think about how amazing it would be to have those wings of hers reach around my neck as she showered me in affection by nuzzling my chin... ‘Dragondragon thatisadragon.’ I just pancaked myself on the snout of a dragon. The big, green lizard was starting to rouse. With no small amount of noise, I 180’d and forward-marched the hell outta there. With a grouchy lizard sure to be on my heels, I sprinted past Twilight Sparkle, who must have the superb reflexes of an athlete to not be trampled by one such as I, even when I leapt from the mouth of the cave entrance, landed on my belly, and covered my head with my arms. I braced for a wall of fire to pass over me which was sure to come. Any... second... now. I got up on my hands and looked up to see the face of Twilight Sparkle, the bearer of the element of magic and majesty. She still was feeling the effects of the chase, as she heaved and panted, and she smelled... minty? No, I had to get out of here. With no small amount of effort, and with the use of no amount of already-depleted energy, I got to my feet. With no small amount of determination and dedication, I started moving. The problem was that my travel speed no longer was stellar. I still managed to get one foot in front of the other, and my direction was still away from the bookworm belle, but... Twilight Sparkle managed to keep pace with me, and went so far even as to try walking beside me, and assure me that she intended no harm. Oh, if only she understood. Because I was still dead-set on getting away, I turned away, and because the damsel had also decided to try and stay by my side, I unknowingly just started going in a slow circle. Fate, it seemed, cut to the chase, and I collapsed, completely spent. Twilight Sparkle  loomed ever closer, with an unspoken promise of friendship and companionship written all over her features. That pretty much broke down my last mental defense. I’m not exactly proud of it, but I wept like a baby in the presence of Princess Twilight Sparkle. ‘Oh, jeez.’ Twilight didn’t really know what to do with the poor creature that now was inconsolable and curled up into a cryball. He was even hugging his knees. Now you knew that’s a cryball.  Hopping from hooftip to hooftip, Twilight Sparkle held an internal congress as to what to do about this particular situation. Weighing option after option, a particular thought came to her. Something that she would forever refer to hereafter as WWFD. ‘What would Fluttershy do?’ After all, she would be the best candidate for dealing with mysterious creatures as well as individuals in a state of complete hysteria. Applejack’s blunt honesty and Rainbow Dash’s bravado wouldn’t be appropriate here. Neither would be studying him, or gossiping with him while fitting him for a dress. No, Pinkie Pie. Parties do not help with hysteric and crying people. Besides, aren’t you a baker? Isn’t this a work day? Get out of my house. Fine. Please, get out of my house. Ahem. Well, what Fluttershy would do is heaps lots of love and affection on the poor creature and hold him. Tenderly. Twilight Sparkle didn’t know about the love and tender parts of it, but she knew what she could do about it. Approaching towards the biped cautiously, Twilight Sparkle rounded towards the unknown being’s head, and bit her lip, trying to think of how best to go about this... Her horn lit up with ethereal energies and the crying guy was lifted into a sitting position, something easier said than done, much to both Twilight’s astonishment and annoyance. She then interposed herself between the mystery creature and the ground, making sure to settle on her haunches before terminating the spell. The creature oomph-ed into her arms, and she struggled to hold him up. ‘Why did I think this was ever a good idea?’ But... that seemed to finally provoke a response. The creature wrapped its arms around her and buried his face in her coat, soaking Twilight In his tears. She grimaced and bore the burden. Soon enough, the tears slowed, and the creature became still. Twilight Sparkle tried to rouse the creature, but she noted with some shock that it had fallen asleep due to exhaustion and previous hyperventilation. Twilight looked around. It was a relatively safe place, being a hillside in the Whitetail woods. The trees stood, with the grass swaying with green leaves almost in harmonious sync. Twilight groaned. She would have to carry this heavy thing to safety. ‘Great.’