Logic Impaired

by CakeGrenade


The Mare In The Moon (part 2)

The Next Day everypony was getting ready for the summer sun celebration:

Rainbow Dash was sleeping on a cloud,
Rarity was keeping the town hall clean,
Applejack was making apple related food,
Fluttershy was forcing her birds to sing
And Pinkie Pie was making...cake

But Twilight still had to keep an eye on all of them...she didn't want to of course...and that's why she made Spike do it.

After many hours of reading every single book in the library, Spike finally came home (very tired of course) and decided to go to bed
"Oh you useless Dragon" Twilight said "ill just wake you up when its time for the summer sun celebration"

*1 minute later*

"SPIKE WAKE UP NOW" Twilight yelled into the baby dragons ear "Your going to miss the summer sun celebration"
"Uuuuuurgh" Spike said
"Stop moaning" Twilight scowled at Spike until he got out of his bin bag bed.
--

"Whooooaaaaa" Twilight stood in awe at the sight of the town hall "This place doesn't look like a shit anymore"
"Why thank you darling" Rarity replied "I took me forever to clean"
"I don't care" Twilight said

*a wild nightmare moon appears*

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH" Laughed Nightmare Moon "WHO WAS THE ONE THAT FREED ME?!"
"I did" Twilight said "Now you must do my bidding!"
"No" Nightmare moon said
"Wha?!" Twilight was angry...she wanted a refund "But you must!"
"Well I'm not" Nightmare Moon said "But I will plunge all of Equestria into eternal night if you don't mind"
"I DO MIND!" Twilight said "I EITHER GET A REFUND OR YOU DO MY BIDDING!"
"Well tough" Nightmare Moon flew out the window and into night sky
"FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!" Twilight ran to her library to find out how to put her back in the moon but once she got there she was confronted by the five ponies from her list, "You know something about this Nightmare Moon character" Rainbow Dash said "Tell us everything"
"Okay" Twilight knew she couldn't out run the Pegasus but she did know a lot about books...she would remember that "CelestiasentmetokeepandeyeonyouviaalistihaverighthereandthenigotreallyboredsoidecidedtofreeamoondemonfromherunholychainsandnowshesnotlisteningtomesoiMUSTfindawaytoputherbackinthemoon"
"Fair enough" Rarity said "Everypony look for a book on destroying moon demons"

*4 hours later*

"I found something" Pinkie Pie said "How to put unholy moon demons back in the moon for dummies"
"PERFECT" Twilight said with dilating pupils "This will do just fine" Twilight then threw the book at Rainbow Dash...causing her to fall out the window,
"Why would you do that sugardancingmanbicycle?" Applejack asked "Don't we need that book for defeating Nightmare Moon?"
"Oh, I already know how to do that" Twilight said "I just needed a big, heavy book to throw at Rainbow Dash"
"Oooooooooh" The four other ponies said in unison "Fair enough"
"To defeat Nightmare Moon...we will have to find the ELEMENTS OF HARMONY...and they have been rumoured to be in-" Twilight stopped talking and walked out the library,
"Twilight?" The four ponies said "Where are you going?"
"Just follow me" Twilight told them
they all followed her to a dark forest that was on the edge of Ponyville...everyone was scared
"THE EVERFREE FOREST!" Twilight shouted...everyone looked at her confused for a while before walking in....

*5 hours of walking later.....*

"Urrgh...we've been walking forever" Rarity moaned "I just want to go home" to show her discomfort, Rarity jumped on the ground really hard causing it to crumble and cause a land slide,
"AAAAAAARRRRGGGHHH!" Twilight fell down the cliff and was hanging on to the edge with her hooves...somehow
"Ill save you Twilight!" Applejack yelled, using her mad mountain goat skills she jumped over the rocks and dirt and grabbed Twilight by the hooves...somehow "Hold on"
"Well why the hell wouldn't hi" Twilight said
"Good point" Applejack said "Now...I want you to let go"
"YOU JUST TOLD ME TO HOLD ON YOU DIMWITTED MUDPONY" Twilight said
"Trust me" Applejack reassured her "Let go"
"Okay" Twilight said "But if I die...ill see you in court" as she let go she screamed...but she was then caught gracefully by Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy (thank Celestia...we could of lost a mane character right there).

As they walked and walked...they came up to a small valley, everything seemed pretty normal...trees were being trees...plants were being plants...and there was a baby Manticore having a mental breakdown,
"AAAAHHHH" Twilight yelled "KILL IT!!!"
"NO" Fluttershy bawled "Its just a baby...leave it alone" as she said this, Fluttershy walked up to the Manticore and pulled a small thorn out of its paw,
"How did you know that was there?" Applejack asked
"I didn't" Fluttershy explained "I'm just nuts"
"Oh" Applejack said
"Guys" Twilight was getting restless "Lets carry on our quest..."
they carried on their quest.

Walking another mile into the forest they discovered a river...but not just any river...a dangerous river
The mane 6 looked around and saw another poor defenceless creature having a breakdown: a Sea serpent
"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING!" Twilight yelled "PLEASE STOP CRYING OR I WILL BE FORCED TO HURT YOU"
"Oh but you don't understand" The serpent wept "My moustache is broken"
"I don't care" Twilight said "Just move"
"No" The serpent went from being sad to angry, this caused a chain of events that lead to the serpent bleeding to death because Twilight had used her abilities to stab the creature in the throat...with a tree.
"That worked" Rarity said as she placed a blanket on the creatures eye...since she is EXTREMELY generous.

As they walked into a small circle of trees...a ghostly mist flew by, causing all the trees to have scary faces,
"AAAAAAH" Rarity squealed "That's not natural"
"Wimp" Twilight said
"AHAHAHAH" Pinkie was laughing in the bushes "Where is it?"
"Pinkie what are you looking for?" asked Applejack
"This" Pinkie brought out a chainsaw and started to laugh as she cut down the trees, humming a song while she did it "hmm hmm"
"Well...well" Twilight looked with an open mouth as the rest of the mane 6 backed away slowly
"Wait up guys!" Pinkie shouted

They were all still laughing about the fact that Pinkie just murdered some Trees that they didn't notice that the bridge was broken...causing Twilight to fall...good job she was caught by Rainbow Dash before she fell to her demise (we almost lost a cast member...again...clumsy git).
"WHOA" Applejack said "How are we going to get to the other side?"
"I have wings remember" Rainbow Dash said as she sped to the other side and started to tie bridge on the other side, but evil things had other ideas...
"Hey there" An evil version of what looked like the local sports team crawled out the shadows "do you want to join us?"
"Who are you?" asked Rainbow Dash
"We are the shadowbolts" said on of the players
"Well...I don't really care" Rainbow Dash flew back over to the other side "bye forever"
"What happened" Applejack asked
"oh nothing" Rainbow Dash said "I was just being loyal as shit"
"Well lets carry on you guys...I see a castle up ahead" Twilight pointed to a castle up ahead
"Well lets melondance over there" Applejack said
"No" Twilight said

Once they got to the castle they saw that Nightmare Moon was stood there
"Hello Dearie" Nightmare Moon said
"Can I ask a quick question?" Twilight asked
"Sure" Nightmare Moon replied
"What can kill you?" Twilight asked again
"Well many things" Nightmare Moon said "Explosives, guns, acid, cyanide etc."
"Well ok then" Twilight said with a grin on her face
"Can you guys just go away" Nightmare Moon asked
"Sure thing" Twilight said "Come on girls"

Scene: outside of the fortress tower stronghold castle

"Alright Pinkie" Twilight ordered "Place down the dynamite"
"Okey dokey lokey" Pinkie placed down the dynamite and using the Elements of harmony (which they found in a wheelie bin out side the castle) lit the fuse, causing the castle to explode and killing everything/everypony inside.
--

And since that day...Twilight and her friends would shoot lasers at things that disagreed with the power of friendship...so if you don't have any friends...The Elements of Harmony will find you...and kill you

THE END