George Washington looked back at the strange man, after receiving the Pokéballs containing a very special Smeargle and Magikarp. “Before you leave, might I ask your name? Not once in this conversation have you given it to me, yet you seem to know so much about me.”
The strange man smiled. “The name’s Yossarian.”
George Washington returned the smile. “Nice to meet you, Yossarian. I hope our paths cross again someday.”
Yossarian shook his head. “Sadly, I don’t think they will. I’ve got a boy named Jeff to find after this, calls himself ‘the Killer.’ He keeps filling the Totality of Existence with these Mary Sue knockoffs, but I will catch up to him eventually.” He then lifted his strange musket, with the word ‘Pacemaker’ etched into the barrel. “Still, I couldn’t let a universe like the one you’re in for just happen, so you just pass those Pokémon down through the Presidents and it’ll all work out in the end.”
Before George Washington could respond to any of this, there was a ripping sound, and a ten-foot tall slit in space-time unzipped itself. Light poured out of the opening, and with it came the sound and pressure of gale-force winds. As Yossarian went to enter the light, George Washington shouted, “One final question before you leave: does this heavenly portal mean you are an angel sent from God?”
Yossarian paused, one foot into the rift. “I’m nowhere near divine, General Washington – I’m just a Time-Traveling Dad.” Having said this, he finished walking through the portal, and Washington never saw him again.