Sideboard of Harmony

by FanOfMostEverything


Draining Whelp

Twilight Sparkle trudged through Ponyville, her legs in chains. Her bonds had barely enough give in them to let her shuffle forward, giving her plenty of time to take in what had become of the town. Nothing felt right, even beyond the supernatural numbness that came from the nullifier ring on her horn. It took Twilight a few moments to realize that the piles of dead organic matter were houses, that the refractive gas overhead was the sky, even that the self-perpetuating chemical reactions around her were ponies. Twilight recognized herself and the sun, but almost everything else felt unfamiliar and wrong.

Worse than struggling to recognize ponies for what they were was seeing their expressions. There was no sorrow on their faces as she slowly passed by, no horror, defiant hope, betrayed fury, or even sadistic joy. All Twilight saw was resignation, in some cases bordering on apathy. They had expected her to fail.

Twilight turned her attention to the three young mares escorting her, one at each hip and the third leading her to their destination. At least they felt like ponies. "Girls, please," she said just loud enough for them to hear, moving her head back and forth to catch them all in her peripheral vision. "You can help me. You can fight her."

Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle looked away. Apple Bloom had the excuse of keeping her eyes forward. "Can't do either, Miss Twilight," she muttered. "She's got us on a real tight leash. Prob'ly shouldn't even be talkin' to ya."

"We're here," Scootaloo said more loudly.

Twilight looked up and saw the Golden Oak Library. She recognized it for what it was, but it still felt wrong. It should've been a welcome sight, a home she hadn't seen in years. Instead, all she felt upon seeing it was dread.

Apple Bloom opened the door and led the prisoner in.

Twilight's jaw dropped. At first, she thought—she hoped—that she was just seeing things. A second look confirmed that Celestia's throne really had taken the place of the central reading table. Celestia and Luna really were sitting on their haunches at each arm of the throne, their eyes glowing a faint blue. The conqueror of Equestria really was sitting on her appropriated throne.

She smiled. "Hello, Twilight."

The older unicorn marshaled herself. Though the sight broke her heart, she could still face it with dignity. "Hello, Dinky."

Dinky nodded to the Crusaders. "You've done well, girls. Go with my blessing." They rushed out the door as fast as their hooves could take them.

Twilight kept her focus on the teenager before her. "Why are you doing this, Dinky?"

"Sometimes ponies are more useful with their magic than without it," said Dinky, taking on an instructive tone. She waved a hoof before here in a wide arc. "Take the princesses. I might be able to move the sun and moon if I took their power, but I thought it best to leave the heavens in the hooves of experienced professionals." She grinned. "Of course, burning out their higher cognitive functions helped. Easy, too, given how magical the alicorn nervous system is."

Twilight glared at her. Better that than looking what become of her mentor and friends. "That isn't what I meant and you know it. You were such a kind filly. You even helped save the world. Why conquer it?"

"Hmm. I wonder." Dinky made a show of putting a hoof to her chin. "Why would a nullmage take over the magical land of Equestria?" She sneered. "Isn't it obvious? This is my destiny. My only role in the magic of harmony is to silence it."

"That doesn't have to be true! You could—"

"Twilight. Stop." Dinky shook her head. "You aren't going to convince me. You aren't going to befriend me. I've known my role for a long time."

Twilight sighed, then settled herself into the firmest stance she could manage with shackles above her knees. "I had hoped we could settle this peacefully. I suppose I'll just have to stop you."

Dinky laughed long and hard at that. "Seriously? I beat you when I barely had any idea what I was doing and you had literally all of the magic in the world at your disposal."

"You had literally infinite power at the time."

"Details. The point is that I now sit triumphant, almost full to bursting with the magic of the ponies and the land both, while you're wearing an inhibitor ring." Dinky lit her horn and tossed a twisted chunk of gold at Twilight's hooves. Twilight gasped when she recognized the mangled setting of the Element of Magic. "With your magic, I'll have drained an even dozen Elements and Bearers."

"You forgot one thing," said Twilight, looking back at Dinky, grim purpose in her heart and gaze.

Dinky raised an eyebrow. "Do tell."

"This kind of inhibitor ring doesn't block internally directed magic." Twilight vanished in a burst of light, leaving her physical and magical fetters to fall on the library floor.

Dinky rolled her eyes and fired a beam at the recently vacated space. After a few seconds, Twilight reappeared, paralyzed within the tracer spell, eyes wide and mouth agape. Dinky grinned. "I know. Thank you for the lead on the resistance headquarters. I do hope you were foolish enough to teleport there directly; it will make what comes next so much easier. But right now, I'm going to do to you what I did to... to my..." Her gaze turned distant as her expression became a mask of horror. "Mommy?"


Dinky thrashed in her tangled covers, screaming loud and shrill. Her limbs stiffened for a moment, but she broke the weak telekinesis with barely a thought. Only when she felt the fuzzy warmth of another pony holding her did she realize hers were not the only screams.

"Calm down, Dinky! Please!"

Dinky went still, opening her eyes. The sun peeked through her blinds. The blinds in her bedroom in her family's house. She was still a little filly, and her dad was holding her. "Where's Mommy?" she asked, her voice scratchy and throat sore from her panic.

"She isn't here right now," said Address Unknown.

"Where is she?" Dinky said, her throat even drier.

Address held her tighter. "She's at work. You were exhausted after the Summer Harvest Parade, and we decided you should sleep in. One of us had to stay with you for when you woke up and, well, I'll take any chance I can get to catch up on what I missed."

Dinky squirmed enough to look him in the eyes. "She's okay?"

"She's fine, Dinky. Are you okay?"

Dinky tightened her own hold. "Just a bad dream," she tried to convince herself. "Just a bad dream."

"I see." Address sighed. "I'm barely even used to being a father, and you're already growing up on me. It's a good thing I'm the one who stayed at home."

Dinky released him. "Huh?"

Address gave a sheepish smile. "It's sort of the unicorns' dirty little secret. We don't tell the other tribes about it, mostly because of how embarrassing it is."

"What is it?"

"I think you already know. Do you remember your dream?"

Dinky hesitated, biting her lip. After a few moments, she nodded and whispered, "I had hurt a lot of ponies, including Mommy. I was about to hurt Miss Twilight."

Address sighed and nodded. "That's our shameful secret, alright. Soon after unicorns discover their special talents, they dream of taking over the world."

"Even you?" Dinky asked, eyes wide.


Postmaster General Address Unknown smirked from within his web of information. The private couriers were gone, legislated out of existence. All knowledge, all communication, passed through the post. Through subtle social manipulation and conveniently lost letters, even talking was considered somewhat gauche. Celestia was naught but his puppet. Equestria was his to control.

Cackling, Address planned his most devastating policy yet: He'd raise stamp prices by a cent!


Address nodded, smiling at something. "Yes, even me. But just because you have a dream doesn't mean you need to act on it. And the way you reacted to that dream tells me that you are very good little pony indeed."

Dinky managed a small smile of her own. "Thanks, Dad."

"Of course." Address ruffled her mane. "Come on downstairs. I'll make you some waffles."


Dinky, Spell Tyrant 2WU
Legendary Creature — Unicorn Wizard
Hexproof
Whenever a spell or ability you control counters a spell, you get an experience counter.
Spells your opponents cast cost 1 more to cast for each experience counter you have.
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