//------------------------------// // Bookmark! - Twilight's First Heist // Story: Twilight the Third // by MagnetBolt //------------------------------// Shining Armor wasn't a stupid pony. Even as a guard recruit, he was dimly aware that his sister was not what most would call a good pony. In polite company ponies said that she'd made a few mistakes. Mistakes like getting caught shoplifting books (even if she could afford them and had immediately paid for them after being caught), being found in places where she wasn't supposed to be, and once being discovered with her hooves in somepony else's pocket. The mistakes had been getting less and less frequent, especially after one shop owner had decided to press charges and Twilight had spent a week in juvenile detention, in theory to teach her a lesson about how crime didn't pay. Shining Armor wanted to believe, really wanted to believe, that she was becoming a better pony. The smarter part of Shining Armor, the part that looked at Twilight how she was instead of the way he wanted her to be, was certain she wasn't becoming a better pony, just better at not getting caught. This was the part of Shining Armor that would, later in his life, see him rise quickly through the ranks. That smarter part was therefore very suspicious about why Twilight would come to visit him in the castle, even if he was technically on leave. "Like I need to have a reason to visit my big brother," Twilight smiled, hugging him. "I had the day off of school and you have the day off of training, and since Mom and Dad are stuck at work, I thought you could use a friendly face." "How has school been going?" Shining Armor said. Twilight frowned at that, just for a moment before her expression returned to its usual small smile. It was a sensitive subject, and he immediately regretted mentioning it. After the... dragon thing and failing to get into Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns, school wasn't something Twilight liked to discuss. "It's fine," Twilight said, shortly. "Canterlot University is... fine." Shining Armor knew she didn't have a lot of friends. It was difficult, when most of the ponies around you were nearly a decade older than you were. "You could reapply for Celestia's school," he ventured. "You'd be closer to the castle and we'd be able to see each other all the time." "No," Twilight said, and her tone indicated that it was the end of the discussion. "I came here to visit you, and that's it. Those stuffy, idiotic professors can just-" she took a deep breath. "Calm down, Twily," Shining Armor said, squeezing her before letting her go from the hug. "How about we just... go do something fun?" Twilight said. "Let's go to the library," Shining Armor suggested. Twilight waved him off. "That's fun for me, not for you," she said. "Besides, I've read practically every book in the Canterlot University Library." "But I can get you into the castle library," Shining Armor said. "I bet they've got some books there you've never read before." "Well..." Twilight hesitated. "Are you sure?" "Only the best for my little sister," Shining Armor said, smiling. At the time he was just glad that he'd managed to improve her mood. Looking back on things, he should have been suspicious from the start. She'd stopped being upset as soon as he'd mentioned the library, and had a smile like a mouse who'd gotten into the cheese. Episode 4 Bookmark! - Twilight's First Heist The Royal Canterlot Library wasn't the largest library in the city. It was, however, the most secure. Only ponies who had been given permission from Princess Celestia herself were allowed in, because of the extensive collection of rare and restricted books. Guards were posted throughout the building, and it was rare that a book actually left. Most were read on-site, often with a librarian hovering around the reader to make sure they didn't damage the fragile, aged paper. Some were so old that the originals were just crumbling scraps of parchment, and ponies had to rely on the notes made by students that had come before them. "Really?" Twilight rolled her eyes. "Why do you need to search my bags before I even go in?" "It's procedure, Ma'am," the guard said, as he held out a hoof for her saddlebags. Twilight relented and passed them over. "It's just stupid. What am I going to do, bring in matches and hold the books hostage until my political demands are met?" She pouted while the guard looked through her things. "Yarn and knitting needles," the stallion reported, pulling the ball of multicolored yarn out and setting it aside. "Everypony needs a hobby," Twilight said, brightly. "Half a sandwich. Tomato?" "I forgot I had that. It's still good. You can have it if you want, but I recommend some extra salt and pepper." The guard nodded and put the sandwich aside gratefully. Shining Armor was well aware that they didn't get to eat on duty very often. Even half a sandwich was probably too tempting to resist. He pulled a book from the bag with a black cover, elegant in the same way as a discreet brown paper bag. "Fifty Shades of Neigh." "It's for a school assignment!" Twilight said, blushing. The guard suppressed a laugh and looked at the last item in her saddlebags. "Hoofcuffs?" The guard asked, surprised at what he'd found. "They came with the book," Twilight said, quietly, her cheeks bright red. "Right, uh, everything seems to be in order," the guard said, repacking Twilight's bags and giving them back to her. "Since you're a guest, please remember the library rules. No entrance is permitted into the restricted section, please avoid making loud noises, and if you have problems reaching a book, see a librarian rather than trying to get it yourself." "Thank you," Twilight said, looking down. The guard gave Shining Armor a small smirk that said it all. He'd already dismissed Twilight as a threat. The smartest part of Shining Armor suggested that maybe, just maybe, he should warn the guard, but it was ignored. "Sorry about that," Shining Armor said, as they walked inside, the guard following them. "They have to check. Last month they had a pony come in here with fireworks and she caused a little bit of a problem." "Because of noise?" "Because of the fire," Shining Armor sighed. "Thankfully she was in the alchemy section when they went off. Those books are specially designed to be resistant to fire, explosions, chemical spills, and melting. The smoke got into the spellbook section, though. I heard they had to send a lot of books away to be repaired." "Fireworks... Trixie Lulamoon?" Twilight asked. "You know her?" Shining Armor was surprised. He didn't think Twilight knew anypony except her teachers and family. "She tutored me on sleight of hoof," Twilight said. "Kind of full of herself, but nice if you get to know her. You know, I bet I could set you two up on a date!" Twilight grinned. "You'd like her. She's got all sorts of personality, and some of it is even good!" "Not a date, but I would like to meet some of your friends," Shining Armor offered, blushing. "You know I've got my eye on somepony." "Yeah, somepony who you never talk about," Twilight rolled her eyes. "You keep secrets even better than I do." That made Shining Armor uncomfortable. He had good reasons to keep certain things secret, even from Twilight. It made part of him wonder just how much Twilight was keeping secret from him, too. "Oh wow, Shiny!" Twilight gasped. "Look at that!" Twilight ran over to a book on a plinth, done up in blue binding with a swirling design on the cover in place of a title. A glass case surrounded it, protecting it from dust, water, and students. "Don't touch that!" Said the guard, before Twilight's hoof could reach up and grab the book. "Please note the signs. That book is very old and valuable." Twilight nodded. "The Tome of Starswirl the Bearded. It's said to contain all sorts of spells! Reversing gravity, teleportation, maybe even time travel!" "The last one's a myth," the guard said. "This spellbook is restricted, though. It's out here because of the fire damage. We've only got so many cases that lock. Once things are cleaned up, it's going back to the locked shelves." "But since it's not locked up, does that mean I can read it?" Twilight asked, hopefully. "Since you're not a student, you'd need permission from the librarian," the guard said. "And she's not likely to give it. She's the only one with the key, so don't ask me." "Oh," Twilight said, lowering her hoof. "Shiny? Could you go ask the librarian if I can read this?" She batted her eyelashes sweetly. "Twilight, there are plenty of other books-" "Please?" Twilight sniffled. "I can stay here with this strapping, handsome guard. I'm sure he can keep an eye on me." She winked at the bigger stallion, who had the decency to blush and say nothing. "Anything for you, sis," Shining Armor sighed. At least he wasn't leaving her alone. "Twilight, bad news. She said no, but I was able to get a different spellbook for... you..." Shining Armor said, as he turned the corner. He trailed off at what he found. The case was open, with knitting needles still in the lock. The guard was unconscious, part of the sandwich still in his hoof. Yarn had been braided into a rope and the hoofcuffs used as a grappling hook, leading to an open window. Fifty Shades of Neigh sat where The Tome had been only a few minutes ago. Twilight, of course, was long gone. Shining Armor burst into the house, furious. "Twilight! I know you're in here!" he yelled. "You don't have to shout," Twilight said, from upstairs. She leaned over the balcony to look at him, smiling crookedly. "I should have known you'd come here first." "You stole a book!" Shining Armor accused. "What's wrong with you? Do you know how serious this is? If you bring it back and apologize, maybe they won't press charges!" "Bring it back, huh?" Twilight looked up, tapping her chin as if considering it. "Nah. I'm gonna keep it. It's a pretty good read, and I'm only partway through it so far!" "I'm not kidding, Twilight," Shining Armor said. He stood at the bottom of the stairs, looking up at her. "This is a felony. Worse, you clearly planned the whole thing! You used me! You played me like a damn fiddle!" "It did take a lot of planning," Twilight admitted. "Arranging the fire was the hardest part, though Trixie's grades are much improved. She was in danger of failing Comparative Theology before I wrote a few of her reports for her." "You even-" Shining Armor shook his head. "Twilight, why are you doing this? You know mom and dad would do anything for you. You don't need to steal!" "Do you know our grandmother, Twilight Twinkle, was one of the greatest thieves of all time?" Twilight asked, tilting her head. "All the money we have was stolen from somepony else. Mostly people who didn't deserve to have it. She even stole a kiss from Princess Celestia, if the rumors are true!" Twilight grinned. "That's... not true," Shining Armor muttered. "She wasn't a thief." "Maybe you should do some research. I did!" Twilight shrugged. "Anyway, I'm going to be leaving town. I wrote a note for mom and dad to let them know. I just came back to grab my stash before I left." She patted a saddlebag. "No," Shining Armor said, firmly. He started up the stairs. "You did something wrong, and you have to fess up to it. I'm going to bring you in." "Something wrong? Nopony was hurt. The guard is just napping from the drugged sandwich, the book is going to be read instead of being locked away, and I got away cleanly." "I'm hurt," Shining Armor protested. "You hurt me when you used me. I'm your big brother and you..." He shook his head. "That really hurts, Twilight. You don't even care." "Come on, don't take it personally," Twilight said. "I love you, Shiny, even if you're a little dense sometimes. I mean, coming here alone? That's just asking for trouble." "I love you too, sis - but I didn't come alone." Windows broke as two pegasai guards burst into the hallway, trapping Twilight between them and Shining Armor. She raised an eyebrow and looked at them. "Okay, that's a little better. But isn't this a bit much for one filly? I'm barely even a teenager." She took a step back. "Just come along quietly," one of the guards said. "You're in a lot of trouble and you're only going to make it worse if you run." "Have you ever heard of the prisoner's dilemma?" Twilight asked. "See, it relates to the way ponies treat each other. Two criminals are being questioned. If one talks and the other doesn't, the one who talks goes free and the other gets a moderate sentence. If neither of them talk, they both get sentenced, but only a light one. If both of them talk, they get long sentences. The thing that works out best for both of them is if neither talks, but it's our nature to try and throw the other pony under the cart to save ourselves." "Ma'am-" The guard started. Twilight held up a hoof. "If I go with you peacefully, I'll, what, get a year or two in juvie? And if I run and get caught It'll be more like four or five. But if I run and you can't catch me, well." Twilight smiled. "Then I guess that would be no time at all." Her horn lit up, and there was a bright flash of light as she vanished. "What in Tartarus?" one of the guards swore. "Where'd she go?!" "The book had a teleport spell!" Shining Armor realized. "She said she'd already started reading it! She must have learned enough to cast it!" "She can't have gotten far," one pegasus said to the other. "Recruit, you did the right thing telling your superiors about what happened. We'll take it from here." They took off through the windows they'd broken. Shining Armor sighed and sat down at the top of the stairs. How had things gone so wrong so quickly? "Stealing a book, leading the guards on a chase through Canterlot, and getting away after luring them into a trap involving a smoke machine, a low bridge, and fast-setting concrete," Twilight Velvet noted, reading over the papers. "She really does take after you, honey," Night Light said. "Night Light, that's not fair," Twilight Velvet said, calmly. "You know I never did anything quite that daring. I never got caught, after all. No, she's much more like her grandmother. My mother could never resist giving little hints and teasing the guards and making sure that everypony knew she was the one behind her crimes." "I remember the first date you and I had," Night Light said. "She stole my wallet and left an IOU. And I only found out when I needed to pay the bill at the restaurant!" "You enjoyed it," Velvet smiled. "It wasn't the only time we pulled a dine-and-dash." "Can you please not discuss crime at the table," Shining Armor said. Dinner was also not going how he had expected. They were supposed to be upset and broken up, not excited! "Don't be such a spoil-sport, Shiny," Velvet cautioned. "Anyway, I'm a bit sad to see your sister strike out on her own at such a young age. I hope she isn't rushing things." "She's a criminal on the run!" Shining Armor snapped. "Don't you even care?!" "Of course we care," Velvet said, her voice dropping to a whisper. "And I'm worried about her. But I love her, and I know you do, too. This was her choice, and as long as she doesn't hurt anypony, I'm just happy that she's doing what she wants to do." Many years later, Captain Shining Armor, Duly Appointed Enforcer of the Equestrian Accord, tacked another newspaper article up on the board behind his desk. A casino had been robbed. The investigation had turned up quite a few interesting things about the owner, and the damage to the building had forced it to shut down for safety concerns, but there was no sign of the money. He couldn't prove it was the work of his sister. Not yet. But it felt like it was one of her capers. "I'll get you, Twilight," he muttered, as he sat back and looked at the array of crimes and unusual events that all centered around her. "I'll bring you in for your own good."