I sat around, with no clue what to do. I remembered that there's snow on the ground and I would have to clear that off my driveway. I have an old snowblower from New York we kept, thankfully since we've had some bad winters down south. I re-bundled up, grab my headphones and went out, I grabbed some snow to check if it was powdery and light or wet and heavy, thankfully it was light, so I cheated. I found out two years ago that with powdery snow, a leaf blower works just as well, the snowblower is a big mean orange motherfucker and is a pain to use. The leafblower would kill my back, but that's if I use it for a long time.
I fired that sucker up and went to work. I was listening to some classic rock so it wasn't really my fault and couldn't hear Rainbow yelling at me what's was doing and what the machine on my back was, or Brian asking, and I quote, 'the fook are ya using a fooking leafblower to clear the snow?'. I cleared my driveway, and the walkway in 20 minutes and just in time too. Being the dead of winter is was getting dark out by 5:10.
I showered, shaved my pedostache and inbound neck beard (the puberty gods have cursed me) put on a neon green shirt, a pair of jeans and my class ring. The party started at 8, so I had an early dinner, I wasn't a excellent cook, but I could manage myself. I was feeling real lazy so I made a loco moco: a Hawaiian comfort food made with white rice, a burger patty, a fried egg and brown gravy. It's quick, cheap and filling, all that matters.
An hour later, Applejack and Dash got us all, and we walked to town, enjoying the night, granted party cloudy . I'm still trying to understand how a pony can move it, but in a world half-filled with creatures from myths, I'm not in a position to question it. We walked on in to town.
"Ah shoot, ah forgot somethin back at ta farm I'll catch y'all in a bit" Applejack said suddenly, odd she would walk half an hour for something, but it may be important
"I'm going to clean the sky, I'll be back in ten seconds flat" called out Dash she she flew away, none of this makes sense. Meh, we walked to Sugarcube Corner, the local bakery and opened the door.
"SURPRISE" screamed 20- something ponies, needless to say we were surprised
"Were you surprise? Huh? Huh?" asked Pinkie. She's the party animal/planner/bat-shit crazy pony of the town. We mingled with the townfolk (town ponies?), Applejack came back with a cart loaded with hard cider kegs.
"Darling, where did you get that ring from?" Rarity asked me, it's a good sized ring so it wasn't easy to hide, and I usually wear it whenever I'm out.
"It's my class ring," everyone looked at me confused, I kept explaining "it's a tradition for high school seniors to get one, mine has the name of my school, mascot name, my name and graduation year. The gem is my birthstone, Peridot."
An hour later
" ALRIGHT EVERYPONY, DANCEOFF TIME!! " screamed out Vinyl Scratch or DJ-PON3 into the microphone (I don't understand how they have turntables here either).
"Let's see what which one of you ponies can take ME down!" Pinkie called out, I smirked, 'I'm not a pony' I thought to myself, at this moment I may or may not have had a couple of glasses of cider. As a white male, I could not dance to save my life. The cider told me I was the fucking master at dancing, I believed it.
"I ain't no pony! Challenge accepted!" I slurred to her, I stood up and successfully walked I a straight line to the dance floor. She pulled a bit out of nowhere (I learned/ was told not to question Pinkie and her antics, by a unicorn).
"Heads or tails?"
"Tails" I called, Pinkie flipped it and the moon landed, looking at the ceiling, I start.
"HIT IT!!" Pinkie exclaimed and that's all I remembered.
I woke up, cold, dazed and confused and in pain. I glanced around, I was sleeping in a tree and missing my left sock. The best parties end up with you waking up in a weird place, and this was a good party. My head was throbbing, I looked around, trying to get my bearing, I was somewhere in Ponyville, so that helps.
"There you are dude! We've been looking all over for you." I looked around for the source of the voice, it was Dash, that I knew.
"Up here". Right, flying ponies exist here.
"Did you put me here? What happened last night? The last thing I remember was a dance off with Pinkie."
"Sweet Celestia, that all you remember?" She asked
"Yea, I still more concerned that I'm 25 feet off the ground, I'm climbing down", I'm part primate so I should be able to handle this. I successfully ended up on solid ground, even in my first hungover state.
Dash and I walked around town, trying to piece together the night. Dash was nervous about something, she wouldn't tell me what, but I had an odd feeling I may have been involved. Oh shit, please tell me I didn't make out with a pony; or worse! We found Twilight and asked her what happened last night.
"I think I could best explain by showing you" Twilight said, powering up her horn.
"Ah still don't understand how ya beat her Chris" Applejack said, I sat there talking to the crowd around me. Turns out the alcohol was right, I was an awesome dancer. I started off and blew Pinkie off the floor. I actually impersonated the break dancers I remember seeing whenever I would go to Manhattan, which makes no sense because I haven't seen any in at least 7 years. I started off with the windmill and launched into a bunch of other tricks I don't know, and finished with a headspin and pointed at Pinkie. He back hooves slowly slid out from under her until she sat on her ass.
"Does anypony know where did Dashie went?" Pinkie asked after a bit, we all looked around, Nelson, using his impressive six foot seven inch frame to look around the party area. We somehow lost a rainbow maned flying (and drunk) pony. Dream me went outside to look for her, a couple minutes later a BANG came from outside the back door.
The guys looked at each other and ran outside, followed by the other five ponies. In the distance, was blue pegasus was flying away, I was passed out face first in the snow. Soft sobbing was heard from the back of the alley.
Rainbow Dash was curled up in a ball covering herself with her wings. The group gathered around her to try and figure out what happened.
"Dash, dear, what happened? Who was that other pegasus?" Rarity asked
"He's an ex-coltfriend, Flash, he tried to rape me, but Chris stopped him." The group gasped
"What happened to him?" Twilight asked
"I came out here for some air, and he attacked me. He kept saying he was going to give it to me, and then Chris came out. He told him to drop me and he didn't, so he pulled something out and said he ' I'll only fire a warning shot'. He pulled something and the thing made a loud noise and a flash of light and the snow kicked up. He said 'the next one will go in your fucking skull' so Flash dropped me and flew away. After that Chris passed out." Dash explained, trying to calm down. The group turned to look at me, only I was gone.
That was some heavy shit. I saved Dash from being raped. How could I not remember that?
"I-I just wanna say thank you" Dash chokes out and puts her front hooves around me.
"Don't mention, I always watch out for my friends." I said.
She pulled her head back and looked at me "Yo-You think we're friends?"
"Not just with you, but all of you. You were the first ponies I met," I said smiling. "Other than me, did everyone else make it back home alright? Oh and my left sock is missing" I said and rolled up my pants to show them my bare foot.
"I think Lyra took it to examine it or something" Twilight said, I'm pretty sure that the one who believed humans were real. Why she would want a lone sock I may never know, but if I lose any socks in the dryer, I'm blaming her.
"Alright well I'm heading home, I'll get my sock later or something. I went home, climbed in bed and got to work fixing my hangover with sleep.