//------------------------------// // Chapter 11: Snog // Story: No spell for that // by Jeweled Pen //------------------------------// Drifting groaned as she rolled around in her bed. She had been feeling so good before. The therapy session had been wonderful, she felt like Sole really got her. But now she felt miserable. All because of Branding. Why did she have to be there? Why? Hadn't she done enough? The unicorn groaned and rolled onto her stomach, letting out a sigh of exasperation. She had class in the morning, she couldn't... well, she supposed she could call in again, but she couldn't do it forever. She needed a distraction, something to keep her occupied, to take her mind of Branding. Ugh, what she wouldn't give for anything to just-- Thump thump thump. Drifting paused and looked towards her door. She then glanced up. “I'd... give a lot if, say, a million bits dropped into my lap? Or even like... a few thousand? I'm not picky.” Sadly, all she received was a few heavy knocks on the door. She got to her hooves and trotted towards it, pulling the door open. Her heart nearly burst out of her chest when she saw the royal guard there, staring at her. “O-oh no, I'm sorry, what's wrong? Am I in trouble? Did I do something—” “Oh, don't play coy, Aeon. You know why I'm here.” “Huh? Why you're--” Before she could finish her words, the stallion was on her. One hoof around her back, the other on the ground and then his lips were pressed to hers. Her eyes bulged wide as he proceeded to kiss the buck out of her. Her entire body went on edge, but after a moment she began to relax, color flooding her cheeks. He wasn't a bad kisser. Not at all. She'd never kissed a pony before, but if this was what it was like, she wasn't surprised they liked it. Slowly her hooves reached up and wrapped around his neck as he bent her back. She wasn't sure what she'd done to get this reaction but-- ACK! TONGUE! TONGUE IN HER MOUTH! TONGUE IN HER MOUTH THAT WASN'T HERS! OH MY GOSH SHE COULD TASTE CIDER! HE WAS DRUNK HE WAS SO DRUNK AND HE WAS MAKING OUT WITH HER WHAT DO WHAT DO PANIC PANIC PANIC! Were he not supporting her so well, she would have panicked a lot more. As it was, she wiggled a bit before the kiss brought her back under control. Okay, she had to end it. Just push on his chest, shove him off you. Now. Now. Okay, now. Aaaaaaaany second now. Okay, not working. Count down. Five. Four. Three. Two. One. Now! … Still kissing. Okay, push him off... now! 'Dang it, woman, get a hold of yourself! Wow, he can hold his breath a long--' Her thoughts were broken when he collapsed on top of her, making her shriek as she found herself pinned under an unconscious, drunk stallion. A shame, and she was totally about to shove him off any second now. She gulped and looked at him. He was... cute. No beard or mustache, a lithe, agile form. Pegasus. White coat, blue hair. But the guards all had that. Also, he'd made the first move. Sorta. Did that count? Did drunk kisses count? Ugh, she wished she had an appointment with Sole tomorrow. Now she had a ton of new questions. She blinked a few more times. Hadn't she been upset about something? Important? Right, Branding! Totally upset about that. Definitely. Odd, seemed kind of... silly now. She blushed as she realized she could still taste the cider on her lips. Or was that him? Buck. Was this normal? Was she supposed to like a kiss given like that? She needed advice! Twilight! Maybe she could send her a letter and-- Her eyes widened and she shook her head, that train of thought slamming her back down to Equestria. As worried and freaked as she was, there was no force in all the worlds that could make her ask a PRINCESS for advice on kissing. She then realized he was all nestled up to her and cuddling in his drunken slumber and she yelped, slowly wiggling out from under him. She stared at the unconscious pony, gulping nervously. Should she get the guards? But what if he got in trouble? He was just drunk, so he'd probably feel bad enough when he got up in the morning and realized all that happened. She'd hate to get him expelled from the castle. And she definitely was not hoping he'd be grateful enough to kiss her again. Totally not that. No matter how much that kiss had made her feel like a woman all the way from the tip of her horn to the toes of her hooves. Nope, not at all. She walked to her bed and took off one of the blankets, tossing it on him, before closing the door. They'd just have a nice, long talk when he woke up in the morning. ------ Drifting's eyes opened wide as she was awoken by extra weight on her bed. It wasn't even dawn yet, her windows still dark. Oh gosh what had she done. She'd let a drunk pony who had technically already assaulted her once sleep in her room and even closed the door. What if she was attacked? What if he was a violent drunk? What if he was still drunk? The lamp suddenly flicked on and he smiled down at her. “Hey Ae...” The words froze in his mouth and she saw as the color drained from his face. “You're... not my wife.” “I... I'm pretty sure that's true,” she squeaked. “Ummm... are... you... going to scream?” he asked timidly, slowly pulling back. “Uhhhh... are you going to try something?” “No! No no! No!” he said quickly, before jumping off the bed and cringing, holding his head. “Ouch... buck it, going to kill him. How many of those did we drink?” He then gave her a nervous smile. “Errr... you aren't a diplomat, are you? Cause... well... errr... buck.” “N-no, I'm not. I'm just a guest of the princess. Or... live in guest.” “Oh. Good. So no international incident. Just banishment. That's... slightly better,” he said with the most charming smile she'd ever seen. “Oh! No, I'm not anypony that important. I'm just a student from Celestia's school.” “Oh, cool, you're a--” That made him lock up and dash back against the wall. “Y-you're a minor? Mother bucking, I-I didn't touch you, did I? Oh buck oh buck oh buck!” Her cheeks turned bright red and she looked away. “Y-you... ummm... kind of... did...” “Oh dear Luna. My wife is going to castrate me and THEN I'm going to be banished.” He took a deep sigh, before nodding. “Well, nothing to do about it. Miss... err...” “Petal.” “Miss Petal. What I did last night... I... I assure you, it is not anything a guard has any right doing with a student. I was drunk, but that does not explain or forgive me of my actions. If there is a... child of this incident, then--” “Oh, no no no no! You just kissed me, that's all!” He blinked. “Wait... that's... it? Just a kiss?” “It was... a very long, very passionate kiss,” Drifting said with a blush. “Your... tongue may have been involved...” She then poked her hooves together. “A-and I'm not... that much a minor.” She glanced back to him. “Besides, you're not that much older than me. I think.” “Oh... so no banishment then. Just castration. That's... slightly better. I don't suppose you have some coffee?” “I can go get some?” He shook his head and cringed. “Ouch, no. I deserve this. So ummm... can you please tell me all I did?” He then sighed. “And I'd best go tell my commanding officer. He'll find out one way or another.” “You were drunk, snogged me. Like... a lot of it. I uhhhh... I'd never actually... been kissed before but ummm... you made an impressive first showing.” “Ah buck and I stole your first kiss, too?” He face hoofed. Then fell over. “B-bad idea...” “It's really okay. I mean, it wasn't very special but... it was still pretty pleasant. It actually helped clear my head.” “Really? Well, happy some good came of it. Never drinking again. Ever. I bucking mean it this time. So... I kissed you?” “Yeah. Then you kind of... passed out on me. So I tossed a blanket on you and went to bed.” He sighed. “Miss Petal, you are far too trusting. After such an act, you should have called the guards. I appreciate you not doing that, of course. But I could have been anypony! I could have been a real danger to you!” “I know but... I didn't want to get you in trouble.” He paused, a smile forming on his lips. “Well then, Miss Petal, you have a heart filled with forgiveness and beauty that compares only with that of your delicate features.” Her cheeks turned even redder. “I appreciate your kindness in trying to protect me, but I must report this. I will try not to bother you again. Thank you for your compassion and, should we meet again, I swear I shall be in your debt.” He then turned and trotted out the door. She watched him, eying the door once it closed before sighing. “Did he really have to be married?” she asked the sky, before laying back. “Oh well... he'd probably have been like Branding, anyway.” She still couldn't help smiling none the less. She found her bed was also far, far more comfortable now as she nestled in to get some shut eye. ------ Drifting grinned and hummed happily to herself as she finished applying her makeup. She was pretty and gorgeous and had a wonderful night. Sure, it was a bit.... entertaining and she hadn't gotten as much sleep as she would have liked, but it didn't stop her from being in a good mood. In fact, she felt pretty awesome right now, tired or not. She grabbed her bag, opened her door, and froze at the sight of the royal guard captain. “Errrr, hi.” “Hello. Miss Petal, I presume?” “Y-yes? Am I in trouble?” “No, of course not. I just wish to discuss the incident last night with our guard. Neon Wave?” “Who? Oh! Ummmm... the guard who....” “Assailed you last night, yes. I will need a statement and if you intend to press charges. I assure you--” “No!” she said quickly, shaking her head. “He made a mistake, that's all. He was drunk and came to the wrong room. He didn't do anything violent or rude, it's fine.” “Err... are you sure? He gave the impression that he may have... assaulted you.” “He kissed me, but it's fine.” Buck, it was more than fine. “As long as he stays off the booze for a while, I'm fine. Mistakes happen and I do not want to ruin his career over this. Please.” He sighed before giving a nod. “I'll need a signed statement for that, but... if you're willing to let it go without pressing charges, the act will be mostly forgiven. Are you sure? You are a guest here, after all.” “We all make mistakes, there's no need to be too harsh about them. Heaven knows I'd hate to have some of my dumb things come back and haunt me.” “Well... thank you very much, Miss Petal, for your time. I will have a formal statement written up to be signed later by you. I assure you, he won't come within a hundred yards of you again.” She blinked. “Err... why?” “He's being transferred across the city.” She cringed, lowering her gaze. “O-oh. I thought... he seemed nice. I... thought it might be nice to meet him and his wife when he was sober and... sorry, never mind. I guess it's for the best... I uhhh, I need to get to class. Thank you.” She turned and trotted off. The captain eyed her as she left, looking thoughtful while he rubbed his chin. ------ Drifting grumbled as she trotted back towards her room, her backpack weighted down with sooooo much homework. She really had to stop missing school days. It just made everything such a big hassle. Branding had tried to approach her in the halls and left a dozen or so letters in her locker, but she'd avoided her each time. She hoped the other mare would get the hint soon. Her hatred had disappeared as she found something new to focus on, but she still didn't trust the other mare in the slightest. The other mare could and probably would turn on her at any moment and she wanted nothing to do with a mare like that. All she wanted was to be left alone. Well, left alone by that mare. Her mind kept flashing back to another pony she wouldn't mind bothering her so much. If nothing else, at least she was getting picked on less at school, less ponies were going out of their way to make her miserable. During study hall she'd even set aside a bit of time to work on a letter for the princess. A thank you letter for all she'd done. Even if they'd had a bit of a rough encounter, she'd really wrongly judged the mare and she was now quite thankful she had met her. Also, she added a minor note asking if it would be possible to have some of her notes delivered to her mother. After all, her mother didn't have any idea about this kind of thing. It was cruel, but it gave her a nice, warm fuzzy feeling. She felt quite happy with herself when she returned home and trotted through the castle, humming softly as she looked around. Then froze at the two guards standing outside her door. A unicorn mare with a white coat and red mane, and a pegasus guard who... might have been the one who kissed her. Maybe. All the guards had white coats and blue manes, at least the stallions, but she was pretty sure it was him. Probably. “Hey, Miss Petal!” the stallion said with a wave of his wing. Okay, about ninety percent sure. “Hey... you. I uhhh... don't think I actually got your name.” She wondered if he knew she'd talked with the captain already. “Neon Wave,” he said with a grin. Odd, when she came closer she began to notice he was sweating and looking a little nervous. “This is my wife, Aeon. Remember I mentioned her?” “Oh!” Drifting said, color flooding her cheeks before she gave a small grin. “Hi. Yes, you did. I didn't think I'd see you again.” “Oh, apparently you'll be seeing a bunch of us,” the unicorn said with a grin, before trotting forward and giving Drifting a massive hug. “The captain asked us to meet with you, together.” She then paused. “Dear, are you okay?” “I-I'm fine, j-just... n-not used to getting... ummm... hugs,” she squeaked, her face bright red now. Aeon blinked, before giggling and pulling back. “Well, aren't you just adorable? The captain came and asked us to try and get to know you, since apparently Neon made an impression on you yesterday.” “Oh, he definitely did that,” she said with a small grin. She caught sight of the stallion shaking his head, clasping his hooves together in a silent prayer. “He was very nice and we talked for a bit. It was... nice. I haven't really... talked to any of the guards here. They're so... ummm... kind of scary...” Aeon nodded. “Oh, I hear that from time to time. But trust me, they're all a bunch of big ol' softies once you get to know them. We'll introduce you to a few of them. I'm sure a bunch of them are dying to speak to you.” “W-what? Me? Why?” Aeon shuffled her hooves and looked to the side, the confidence fading suddenly. “Well... I mean. We've all heard the rumors. After the princess brought you here and all. Not to mention... well, you know. Soooo... are the rumors true? I mean... are you...?” Drifting blinked, her mouth falling open. She couldn't believe it. There were rumors. Here she was, in the castle with a bunch of ponies who didn't know her, and there were still rumors? No, of course there were rumors. Some of the school ponies had probably talked about her nearby. She sighed and lowered her head. “Yes, they're all true. I'm... a transmare,” she mumbled softly. “Good to know everypony in the castle knows.” It wasn't all bad, though. If they knew, they'd still come here to see her. Maybe it wasn't a big deal to them. She'd gotten a kiss out of it, too. Silence filled the air. She blinked and looked up. Aeon looked shocked, Neon just looked confused. Finally the pegasus coughed. “Errr... what's a transmare?” “It means she's a... cross dresser,” Aeon said, still staring. “A cross dresser?” he asked, before blinking. His face wilted. “W-wait, you're a GUY? Ew!” Drifting recoiled from that. “W-what do you mean, ew?” Her chest hurt a little from that reaction, but she tried to keep the tears in check. “Err, I just meant, err--” She glared at him. “You were the one who barged into my room in the middle of the night and kissed ME! Not the other way around! You have no right to be disgusted!” she snapped at him. “Wait, WHAT?” Aeon roared, her head whipping around towards Neon, who suddenly yelped and recoiled. “N-now honey, it's not what it looks like. I-I thought she was you and... I-I'd just had a few too many ciders and--” “You were out DRINKING? You said you just had a late shift! Ohhhh, it's Ivyleague again, isn't it? I knew hanging out with that stallion would lead to this!” Drifting snorted. “He barged into my room, kissed me, then passed out on top of me. Then thought I was you and tried to crawl into bed with me.” It was adding fuel to the fire, but she was feeling a little bitchy after that ew comment. And here she'd been feeling so good after last night. “Neon, you did WHAT? She's a student! Well, she... he--” “She,” Drifting said quickly. “She's a student!” “I-I didn't do anything, I swear! I mean, aside from the kiss!” he said weakly, cowering before the fury of his wife. Drifting sighed and walked past the two of them, stepping into her room and closing the door. She then crawled and collapsed onto her bed. She listened to them scream(well, mostly Aeon scream, mostly Neon whimper) for a while before there was a knock on the door. “Errr, Miss Petal?” Aeon's voice came through. “What?” the unicorn asked. “Can... we speak for a moment?” “I'd really rather just lay here in my misery.” “Please? I've sent Neon off to get some chocolate.” Drifting sighed and cocked her head to either side. She could use some chocolate now. Slowly her horn glowed and the door clicked open. “Fine.” Aeon stepped in and gave a small smile. “So... errr... I'm sorry about Neon. He often speaks without... thinking.” “He's not the only one,” Drifting muttered. “If that wasn't the rumor that everypony was talking about, what was?' “Well, with all the interest that the princess has been giving you, along with...” Aeon paused and pointed towards the boxes filled with 'research' from the studious alicorn. “Homework, most of us thought that... well... you know.” “No, I don't, and I'd rather not guess something else and reveal some other stupid facet of my life.” “That you're Twilight's personal student now.” Drifting blinked a few times as she tried to process that. She stared at Aeon, her mouth opening, then closing, then opening again. Finally, she had no other choice but to fall to her side and laugh, so hard her entire body shaking. It was probably the most ridiculous thing she'd ever heard. Her, be THAT mare's student. Her grades were nowhere near that good, she had barely even known about the alicorn for more than a month and, most importantly, she wasn't. Important, that was. There was no way she could possibly be worthy of the interest of one of the most important and powerful ponies in the world. It took her a few minutes before finally she was able to catch her breath. “I-I'm sorry, I just... oh buck I needed that,” Drifting said, still snickering. “Me, be HER student? Are you kidding? I'm only JUST passing half of my classes! She was able to find out more about my condition in a few weeks than I have in my entire life! Buck, that's even with her doing... whatever it is she's supposed to be doing.” She snickered again, looking to her. “Y-you really thought I was her student?” “W-well, there are a lot of rumors... since you have been brought to her old room and such...” “Oh... oh that's awesome. I wonder if that's why they stopped picking on me at school. Afraid of the princess' star pupil, eh?” she asked, before bursting into another fit of giggles. “S-sorry, but no. I'm just some poor, stupid sap she's taken pity on and is helping through... being this.” She gestured to herself. “Oh. If... it's any consolation, I wouldn't have guessed.” “That... does kind of help. A little. I figured most of the soldiers knew. I mean, I hoped they didn't... but... after... that, I liked to think they... didn't. I guessed... rumors and...” “Well, there might be a few rumors, but I haven't heard them. I'm not always in the loop, though. Besides, you being the newest princess' student is far juicier gossip.” The other mare trotted over. “So, are you okay?” “Of course I'm okay.” “I mean... what... exactly did Neon do last night?” “Came to my door, kissed me and then passed out on me. Then thought I was you and tried to crawl into bed with me.” “Uh huh. If you don't mind me asking... why didn't you call the guards once he passed out?” Drifting blinked a few times, before lowering her eyes. “I... didn't want him to get in trouble. Kinda... felt I... owed him for that.” “Owed him?” “He was a really, really, realllllly good kisser and he kind of put some things in perspective and I just remembered I'm talking to his wife and--” Aeon looked a tad annoyed, but kept her tone kind and sweet. “No, no. He is a good kisser, it's one of his redeeming qualities. He has so few of them sometimes.” The two suffered through the silence, before Drifting sighed again. “I'm not a cross dresser.” “Oh?” “I'm a transmare. I... am a mare. I was just... I was born in the wrong body and... I'm getting it fixed. Or I'm trying to. And... and I'm not just a cross dresser.” “It's fine, whatever you--” “No, it's not fine. It's not... I'm not... I am a mare. I was just... born unlucky. Born wrong. I'm not... weird or disgusting or anything like that...” Aeon sighed and face hoofed. “Listen, if this is about what Neon said, don't take it personally. As... hard as that may be. He's just... he doesn't THINK. He just speaks. He's never kissed a guy, as hard as that--” “I'm not a guy!” “Yes, I... well, I don't get it but--” “If you wanna try, there's about ten tons of paperwork about it scattered around my room, courtesy of my 'teacher',” she snapped bitterly. “Listen, I'm sorry! I don't really know what to say about it, okay? It was all kind of just... blind sided me. Us, both of us. We couldn't have guessed and we're not trying to make you mad, okay?” Aeon said before getting to her hooves. “If you wanna be mad and angry, fine. I was just trying to be friendly. If you don't want that, I'll leave you alone.” “W-wait,” Drifting said quickly, looking up. “I-I'm sorry, I didn't... I just... it's... been a very...” she sighed. “It has been very tough lately and I was taking it out on you. I'm sorry. That was wrong of me. I just...” Aeon stopped, then gave a nod, before sitting down. “So... ummm... never really met a pony like... this. Before. Well, that I know of. There's a few rumors about some of the lunar guard, but even then. So... how about you tell me about it? I promise I won't judge. And I'll try to keep insensitivity as low as I can. But, err... not really sure what to say.” Drifting gave a sigh, before nodding. “Okay. It's... not always the easiest to explain. But... I'll try. So... ummm, as far as I know...”