"Welcome to the Crypts of Mortuana," droned a receptionist with eyeshadow, pale coat, and even more eyeshadow. She wore a black dress with multiple lace ribbons and tiny equine skulls dangling from the collar. "Where the living get lucky and the dead even luckier. Are you seeking to be entombed on this bleak day?"
"Well, actually, I'm registered for a tenth story room," Vinyl Scratch said. She stood with her friends in the dimly-lit lobby of the first floor. Fake cobblestone flooring and brick walls were illuminated by tacky wooden torches. The distant sounds of rolling slot machines pierced an ever-permeating howl of artificially generated banshees and spooks through the hotel's sound system. "VIP Section. The name is Scratch... Vinyl Scratch. I bet you'll find my file under tonight's entertainment: DJ-P0N3."
"Ah." The employee's voice lilted ever so slightly. "The deliverer of tonight's festive funeral dirge."
"Eugh..." Lyra facehoofed. "Goddess."
Bon Bon giggled.
"Hey... uhm..." Caramel leaned towards Rainbow Dash, squinting across the lobby. "Are those the bathrooms?"
Rainbow Dash nodded as she hovered. "Yeah. Look like it."
"The doors are labeled 'Stiffs' and 'Cadavers.'" Caramel sighed, ears drooping. "As if public restrooms didn't stress me enough..."
"Here we are, Madame Scratch," the receptionist produced a set of keys. "Room 10-C, Luxury Suites. And you may be pleased to know that your luggage was delivered there an hour ago."
"Kickflank." Vinyl levitated the keys with a nod. "Looks like the manager pulled some strings."
"We're always happy to extend our coldest crypts to the musicians of the night," the receptionist droned, batting an eyelash with spiderweb markings. "Oh... and before I forget." She hoofed over a couple of round chips. "Compliments of the house."
"Hey!" Bon Bon cradled the items in question. "Snazzy!"
Lyra yawned. "I'm surprised she didn't pull that out of a tracheotomy scar."
"Ew, Lyra."
"Crawling with—I dunno—gothic millipedes or something."
"Ew again." Bon Bon groaned, trotting alongside Vinyl. "Let's just get to our room already. I need a shower—" Just as she and Vinyl rounded a pillar, a ceramic ghost stuck out—accompanied by a shrieking sound effect. "Aaaack!"
"Hahahaha!" Rainbow Dash laughed.
"Oh... and be wary of mischievous spirits," the receptionist droned from a distance. "Or else they will follow you all the way to your rooOooOooOoom." A beat. "Have a miserable day."
"Hmmm..." Lyra smirked. "Catchy."
"Grnnngh..." Bon Bon frowned, still catching her breath. "I am not amused."
"Could we go now, please?" Caramel asked. "I could really use that shower too."
"Hey..." Lyra winked. "When you visit the desert, the desert visits you back, no what I'm saying?"
"...no?"
"Eh..." Lyra waved a hoof. "Go huff on lavender."
"I'd like to see the sights of this town, personally," Rainbow said. "My wings need a good stretch."
"Do whatever you like. Me?" Vinyl pivoted about. "I gotta survey the dance hall. Here." She floated the keys over to Bon Bon. "Check on the hotel and my luggage for me. Is that cool?"
"Positively frosty, Vinyl," Bon Bon said.
"I dunno about you, but I'd be more than happy to get this gig out of the way." Vinyl shuddered, trotting towards the opposite end of the lobby. "These poor plebeian saps need a good healthy dosage of Neigh Inch Nails, and I'm the mare to deliver it to them..."
"You do that," Rainbow said, waving. She turned towards the others. "So... onwards and upwards?"
"Yes. Let's hurry." Bon Bon shuffled ahead, heading straight for an elevator. "Before a bunch of employees decide to recruit us for a touristy sacrifice." A screaming plastic skeleton popped out of a wall panel. "AAACK!"
Lyra laughed.