//------------------------------//
// Parasprites 
// Story: True Facts About ... 
// by ShadowWalking18 
//------------------------------//

These are the indisputable facts about Mother Nature's cruelest predator, the parasprite. 

Parasprites are composed of two parts: a fat little body, and tiny wings that, by the laws of aerodynamics, shouldn't allow for flight. But parasprite don't give a shit and flies anyways. 

The Parasprite comes in many forms of color, are perhaps the cuddlest looking creature in nature.

But don't let the cute little eyes fool you. The Parasprite is perhaps one of natures most efficient predator.

It does this by being able to quickly devour any form of food substance within .04 seconds upon seeing it.

Give it a try, find something edible and then decide to eat it in that same moment.

Sorry you just ate a piece of cat poop, try again.

Sorry you just ate a pencil, that we stuck in cat poop.

Parasprites a hermaphrodites, meaning they have both mommy parts and daddy parts and are capable of self reproducing.

However unlike ordinary reproduction, the Parasprite takes it to a whole new level of horror.

They do this by hacking up their babies, which are just a vicious hunger as their parent.

This is why it sucks to attend a parasprite baby shower. There is just way too much coughing. Gross.

The Parasprite is perhaps natures smallest creature, with the Breezies being smaller. 

But if you know you are being compared to something that can only fly with a gentle breeze you are really, really damn small.

You may not have noticed, but the Parasprite has really large eyes. They are the largest in relation to its body then any other animal.

Each one of its eyes is heavier then its brain, which might explain why they haven't invented anything.

If you challenged a parasprite to a staring contest, it probably wouldn't understand you, but it would stare at you with a little smile. And you would think that was enough.

The parasprite wouldn't think anything, and probably just make a pee pee.

Just remember, if someone offers you a puff ball with wings. Crush it. Then set it on fire.

You will save yourself a lot of trouble.