//------------------------------//
// Ponies 
// Story: True Facts About ... 
// by ShadowWalking18 
//------------------------------//

These are true facts about the Pony.....

"The Pony, known by nerds as 'Equus Intelligencia', is a bountiful species populating every continent on Equus except Arctice. Equines -of which you are a part- are available in three flavors, and all have their own unique abilities. 

The first are the Unicorns. Unicorns are a magical subspecies of pony which have a prominent spire of bone protruding from the forehead. This bone -called a horn- allows a unicorn to channel and focus magical energies, unleashing a vast array of spells which varies depending on the unicorn casting said spells. Despite popular belief, and many erotic novels, the unicorns bone horn has no nerves within it, and thus cannot feel things. And good thing to, it be rather odd if it could. I mean, that be like walking around with a boner on your head. Just embarrassing.

Next are the Pegasi. Pegasi are an odd subspecies of pony, as they are the only ones capable of natural flight, and are known to interact with clouds and weather. The bones of a Pegasus are hollow, which grants less weight than other pony races. Unfortunately, this also means that Pegasi are prone to broken bones, and this goes double for the wings. That's why insurance premiums on Pegasus health insurance plans are really friggin' high. That, and it's hard to get the cast off of the wing without breaking something else in the process, which nets you a double fee from the procedure. Then you have to get another one put on, and... Just ask any pony on a weather team and they'll set you straight.

Lastly, and least impressive, are the Earth ponies...

They live on the ground. And, um, farm I guess. Not as much of a wow factor for this one. I mean, how are you gonna compete with magic and flying? I guess you could lift something heavy... And I guess they know about nature. 

Whoever wrote this script needs to do more research on- What? No way! Let me see that! 

Oh. Apparently, Earth ponies don't even have a Wikipedia article... Well, I guess we should just cut to the next fact. Cut there. Next fact please."