Maud was nervous. No, she was scared. No, terrified. Screw that, she felt like running home and crying in her mother's hooves out of indescribable fear she felt. Some of mama's homemade cookies and a glass of warm milk wouldn't have gone amiss either.
No one would have ever guessed either.
Maud still looked like Maud. About as Maud as Maud could be. Appearing to be rather bored with it all whilst sporting a stare that seemed to pierce your very soul. Even the royal guards that she passed by seemed fooled by this immoveable mask she wore. She wished they could see past it.
At least then they might offer her some consultation, like: "don't worry, you'll fine." "The greatest threat Princess Celestia poses to you is mothering you to death." "There's naught tae be scared of, wee lassie." Yes, she imagined that last one with a Scolttish accent. Screw you, she liked the thought of a big burly stallion in a plaid skirt.
That sounded worse than it was meant to.
Anyway, by the time she reached the great big doors to the throne room, she was about ready to collapse in a seizure, if not ruin the carpet at least. Oh Maker. Neither of those options, please.
"Maud Pie?" one of the guards that stood guard asked her. Oh Maker, that voice was so deep and masculine. Concentrate on that, not on the princesses.
Oh Maker. There were two princesses these right, weren't there? Not just Clestia, but also her sister Luna, too. Concentrate on the stallion, his firm muscles, that shapely jawline, those blue eyes, that scar on his neck. Scars were cool.
"Um, ma'am?" the guard asked nervously as the mare just seemed to stare at him, if not right through him. "Ma'am!"
The mare snapped out of it. "Yes?"
"You are Maud Pie, right?" he asked, giving her an odd look.
"Yes," she nodded her head in response.
"Okay, good," the guard said, looking at her sideways as he turned to open the door. "Everyone's waiting for you inside."
The doors swung open mightily to reveal the grand room. She liked it. It was made of rocks. Marble and granite and others she did not have time to examine, as terror once again swept over her. There they were, directly in front of her. The immortal princesses, rulers of Equestria, matriarchs of magic, capable of wielding celestial bodies as easily as eating an ice cream cone, and they had called her, of all ponies, to meet with them for some vague reason.
Her entire family and Pinkie's friends were there too, for some reason. That actually helped quite a bit. But, then, why were they here? Obviously, because it concerned them too, apparently, somehow. Pinkie, of course was the first to rush to her side in concern.
"Maud? Why are you so scared?" she asked hugging her big sister's barrel in a tight hold.
Everyone but the Pie family lifted their brows in surprise.
"How can you tell?" Rainbow Dash asked, waving confused hooves every which way. She was quickly giving the stink eye by her friends. She laughed nervously and sat down quietly, cringing a little when Limestone glared at her.
"I am about to speak with the immortal rulers of the country, Pinkie," Maud droned dryly. "How are you so calm?"
"Because they're just a couple of playful softies," Pinkie chuckled, releasing her sister. "Besides, somepony's gotta lighten up their day. Might as well be your big sis, Pinkie 'Pranker' Pie."
"I'm four years older than you, Pinkie," Maud defended in a dry and droned manner.
"And I remember every moment of it," Pinkie quipped, patting Maud's mane in a comforting fashion. She sniffed a bit and blew her nose on a handkerchief. "It seems like it was only yesterday when you..."
The eldest sister had shoved a hoof into the pink one's mouth and shook her head with a droned sigh. "Sometimes even I don't understand you, Pinkie."
It was at this point that her mother had come over to offer some reassurance. "Now, Maud, you know your sister means well. In her own... very special way. Do be patient, dear."
"Yes, mother," Maud said, removing her hoof from the pink one's mouth.
"...Then the dam burst and the great Spirit of Harmony rescued the foals and took them away to her eternal carnival in the Andromeda galaxy," Pinkie finished her story. This earned her a bunch of patient sighs and rolled eyes. "Boy... tough crowd."
Celestia seemed to be the only one amused by this. "Well done, Pinkie Pie. But, let's not overshadow the true purpose behind this gathering. Maud, please approach the throne. There is much you need to know... and so little time."
Maud did as she was told.
"Uh, over here, Maud, please," Celestia bid her kindly, biting her tongue. Her sister was having a hard time not keeling over in laughter.
The geologist had barely taken so much as three steps in their direction. The poor mare must have been terrified.
"I can hear you fine from here, your majesty," Maud replied. In truth, she really wanted to get closer, to see if she was just as approachable and huggable as everyone said. But her hooves felt as though they were bolted to the floor.
Celestia facehoofed and groaned. "I tried to be nice, but... there's nothing else for it."
The earth pony suddenly found herself surrounded by a golden aura and yanked towards the throne. all along the way, she made the most boring drone of fear ever heard. The kind that would audiences asleep during a Michael Bay film on LSD and shrooms. The next thing she knew was that she was laying between the two sisters, with Celestia's wing draped over her to both hug and make sure she couldn't bolt away.
Seriously. Those wings were tough.
"You have my attention," Maud spoke in her standard tone. "What is it you wish to talk about, Princess Celestia."
Celestia frowned as she felt the tensed muscles of the earth pony she held against her barrel. She had never met someone so frightened of her before. She had always tried to be approachable to all of her beloved ponies. Did Maud even know why she was frightened?
"I'll not make you more uncomfortable than is absolutely necessary, Maud," Celestia began with a sigh. Taking a deep breath, she prepared to reveal a whole new world to the young mare.
"Maud Pie. You're not like other ponies. I'm sure you've noticed."
Maud nodded. "Yes. The average pony is creeped out by my fascination with rocks. Even fellow geologists tend to avoid me."
"It must be very lonely for you," Luna sympathized, having managed to calm herself. She knew of loneliness quite well.
"I have my family," Maud explained, but gave a small nod all the same. "My sisters' friends tend to be nice to me as well."
As they were talking, the rest of the gathered ponies had gathered around a the foot of the throne, like children listening to a bedtime story. Cloudy Quartz was leaning against her husband, Igneous Rock, for support, awaiting the truth to come out. Their other three daughters were watching with great interest, almost unblinking. Limestone even seemed a little nervous, biting her hooftips as she waited. They never did manage to get her to stop doing that. Pinkie, on the other hoof, was eating her way through a bag of kettle corn. Marble was just marble, a sweet filly who quietly waited for answers.
"Maud," Celestia continued, giving the mare a nuzzle, like a mother would a frightened child. "We, that is, your parents and I, as well as my sister, have considered how to tell you the truth of your origins."
"My origins?" Maud blinked. "From what I've been told, I'm the result of a mare and stallion having sex."
It was simple and blunt. Like taking a flaming sledge hammer to a priceless piece of art while singing Neighwegian death metal. There were numerous awkward coughs, as well as an awkward silence that lingered for a short while. Pinkie and Dash, however, were doing their best not to laugh their silly colorful heads off.
"Erm, yes, that's part of it... Maud," Celestia manage to say after recovering from the unexpected broadside.
"Please excuse her, your majesty," Igneous spoke up, smoothing his pompadour and clearing his throat. "She can very, erm, crude, I suppose, when she feels nervous."
"I'm not a very controlled around strangers," Maud stated, looking up at the ivory mare.
"I see," Celestia said, feeling slightly hurt. It reminded her of when Blueblood was a small colt, he was absolutely frightened of her mane, forcing her to tie it in a pony tail whenever he visited. He was such a good colt back then. "Perhaps you would prefer to sit with your family instead?"
Maud shook her head. "No thanks. I will be fine. I am just not used to being hugged by an immortal princess."
"Understandable," Luna mentioned with a smile. "But, let's not get sidetracked, Tia."
"Indeed," Celestia sighed. "Maud, you're adopted. Igneous and Cloudy have been tasked with protecting you ever since you were born, to help you live a somewhat normal life, whilst hiding the fact your really an alien from the far corner of the galaxy."
Eyes threatened to break skulls, and eyes turned to the husband and wife, who smiled nervously.
"Well, duh, I get the rest of that," Pinkie said through a mouthful of popcorn. "But, adopted? Really? I think I would remember that."
Ignoring that pink party pony, Maud blinked and nodded. "Makes sense."
"It does?" Rainbow screeched, throwing her hooves up in exasperation.
"Like heck it does," Limestone groused bitterly. "All this time I've been first out of the chute and didn't even know it. Somepony owes me big."
Cloudy tapped her none to gently on the snout. "Mind your manners, filly, or we'll have a talk later."
The mare cringed visibly and lowered her head. "Yes, mama. Sorry, mama."
"It does explain why she bleeds green... something," Marble mused thoughtfully.
Twilight however had a very different, almost indescribable expression on her face that worried those who sat closest to her. It was what they described as a I-want-to-know-everything kind of expression. At least two levels below I-must-to-dissect-it-for-science. The reason she was so controlled was most likely because she didn't want to embarrass herself in front of the princesses.
"Well, that was easy," Celestia shrugged. "Now, I will take you to see your biological mother, since you seem prepared enough."
"Do I have a choice in the matter?" Maud asked. Again, she was terrified, even more terrified now than before. She had another mother, one who had given her up for some reason she did not know. One who had apparently given her up. Heck with that. Her mother was an extraterrestrial life form. Or, an alien life form, an ALF, as it were.
"No," Celestia told her simply, before lighting up her horn and blinding everyone for a few brief seconds.
When her retinas had healed, Maud found herself in a dimly lit palace hallway, along with her friends and family. The princesses were there as well. They were also standing in front of a door guarded by a large group of royal guards. This only made things a little more ominous.
A petite unicorn nurse nearby looked up from her clipboard. "You're here earlier than expected, your majesties." She looked at Maud. "I'm guessing this is Maud?"
"How could you tell?" Celestia quipped humorlessly. "But, yes, I felt we should hurry things along.
The nurse nodded and moved to open the door. "She's waiting for you, dear. Don't keep her waiting, she hasn't got that long. But, don't try and overexcite her."
Maud hesitated a moment, then her mother came up alongside her and kissed her cheek. "Don't worry, baby. We'll be waiting right outside the door for you."
This giving her courage, Maud swallowed once and stepped through the door. though not without great trepidation. The door was quietly closed behind her.
The room was spacious. Much like she would imagine a room in a palace to be. there was a desk in once corner, upon which laid stacks-upon-stacks of old books and diagrams. Speaking of diagrams, the walls were covered with them like a second layer of wallpaper. And each depicted things she could not explain or describe. The floor was pretty much spotless.
Curious, Maud lifted one corner of a diagram to see what was underneath. It was another layers of diagrams. Beneath that, another. And another. Another. Good grief, those were some impressive tacs.
"Yes, very impressive," a voice chuckled from the big bed near the window.
Maud jumped, but her expression remained neutral. She looked at the bed curiously. "How did you know what I was thinking?"
"Because I thought the same thing," the voice chuckled, then coughed hoarsely. "Come, let me see your beautiful face. The pictures I've been sent could not possibly have done you the you justice deserve."
Swallowing again, she was very nervous by this point, Maud did as she was bid. Stepping around to the front of the bed, which faced the window, which itself overlooked... well, Equestria. She could probably see her rock farm from here...
... Oh.
Maud slowly turned to see the mare that lay beneath the silk sheets of the bed. Blinking she took a moment to take in her features.
Attached to multiple monitoring machines, with an oxygen mask, she was yellow with a black mane and brown eyes. Quite different from what Maud had been expecting. She blamed those cheeseball alien movies Limestone used to drag her to when they were fillies. This mare in front of her looked like any other earth pony, save that her ears were abnormally sharp.
She found herself reaching up to feel her own ears. The wrinkly mare laughed, though her face remained neutral as a rock.
"Blame your father's genes," her mother blinked. She reached out a shaking hoof towards the younger mare, who stared at it for a moment. "Let me hold your hoof, please."
Maud did as she was told and placed a hoof gently into the frail one before her. Strange, it felt so... familiar. Comforting. She found herself beginning to relax some. Despite neither of them expressing any emotion, they could each feel a kind of peace fill the room, as if nothing else existed.
"Tell me a story."
Maud blinked. "Hmm?"
Her mother nodded. "Tell me a story about yourself. I have received many letters and reports from the Pie clan, but... I want to hear you say it. Tell me something about your life. The good and the bad." She paused a moment to cough fitfully. "I wasn't there for you before, but, here I am now. In some way, let me make up for my absence."
Maud stared for a minute then turned to look out the window. "Okay. I helped my family pull another great prank recently..."
* * *
"What do you want?" Limestone growled.
Applejack walked forward and took off her hat. "I wasn't tryin' to take your traditions away. I was tryin' to share ours. I was so focused on us bein' one big happy family, I thought we needed the same traditions right away. What I shoulda done is learn about yours and teach you about ours. And, over time, we'd make new traditions together. I'm sorry ya'll."
The Apple family and the Pie clan stared at each other for a moment, then Limestone burst out laughing, soon followed by the rest of the Pies. Though Maud was a little more tame than the rest... okay, a lot tamer than the rest.
"Ha... ha... ha," she laughed neutrally.
The Apples were quite perplexed. They looked at each other and then back to the Pies.
"Uh, did we miss somethin'?" Applejack asked, tilting her head to the side. It took a moment before the Pies had calmed down enough to respond.
"Oh, that was epic," Limestone sighed, wiping tears from her eyes. "You should have seen you faces. All, oh, we're sorry for ruining Hearth's Warming, boo hoo, we'll do better next time. It would depressing if it weren't so funny."
"Whaaaaa'?" Applebloom asked.
"Mmhmm," Marble said shyly.
"I was beginning to worry your plan wouldn't work, Pinkie," Cloudy sniffed with a broad smile on her face as she suppressed more chuckles. "I was really getting tired of speaking like an old fogey and eating rock soup of all things."
"And I can finally stop wearing this stupid hat and break out the motorcycles," Igneous cried out jovially as he pulled out a can of mane gel from under his hat, which he tossed away, and then slicked his hair into a great big pompadour. "Ah, so much better. Don't you think so, dear?"
Cloudy bounced her eyebrows with a... certain grin on her face. "Oh, yes. And we can finally push those two beds back together and break out the king sized-mattress."
"After we reinstall the soundproofing," Limestone cried out pointedly. "The rest of us would like to not have nightmares."
"Than you'd better hurry and install it, Limestone," Cloudy chuckled as she sauntered up to her husband planted a passionate kiss on his lips. She then looked back her daughter with a grin. "Your father and I haven't been at it in three whole days."
The entire Apple family was blushing red. Save Granny, who smiled knowingly.
"Whaaaat?"
Maud blinked. "You'd better tell them, Pinkie."
Pinkie, who was the last one to stop laughing, wiped her nose and eyes. "Haahaaaaa. Oh, that was good. It's all been a prank Applejack."
"A prank?" Applejack asked, placing her hat back on her head. "What? Just... what?"
Pinkie sidled up beside her and threw a hoof about her neck. "A prank. It's a family tradition. Every Hearth's Warming, one of us invites some friends over to celebrate with us. And each year we prank them. This year was my year, so I thought I'd make think my whole family was boring as mud."
"This was a prank?" Applebloom asked, staring at Maud, who nodded.
"Of course it's a prank," Igneous snorted. "We live on a rock farm for crying out loud. The most boring place on the face of the planet. We have to do something in order to keep from going insane."
"W-what about Holder's boulder?" Applejack asked, gesturing towards the giant rock.
"What, that old thing?" Limestone asked, giving it a firm kick, which sent it bouncing away. "It's made of rubber. How else would it have fallen down a cliff without shattering? Do you know nothing of physics?"
"Limestone, be nice," her mother chided as she was rubbing her face against Igneous' neck.
"Sorry, mama," her daughter quickly replied.
"We'll talk more later," Cloudy said, pushing herself away from the stallion and beginning her assent up the path. "Right now, we've got presents to open, hot chocolate to drink, and a real Hearth's Warming feast to consume. Do hurry before it all goes cold."
Granny Smith was snickering. "Hehe. Reminds of my younger days."
* * *
"And after that, we spent the rest of the day riding motorcycles around the small racetrack we hid in our backyard," Maud finished her story. Her mother laughed neutrally. "Though, Applebloom had to settle for one of our old mopeds."
Her mother sighed. "What a wonderful family you have, Maud. I wish I could have been a part of it."
"Why weren't you?" Maud asked her. During the story she had crawled up onto the bed beside the old mare. It was much more comfortable than standing.
There was an actual tears in those old eyes.
"Because I had to prepare this world for the future," she explained with a heavy sigh and a fitful cough. "There is something coming. It might not be here today, or tomorrow, or the tomorrow after that. But it will come here, and I must make sure this world is ready. That way, you'll be safe."
"What's coming?"
Her mother took a deep breath and closed her eyes for a few moments. "People who would look down upon the people of this world as unworthy beasts and savages simply because you did not poses certain technologies. Who would value the life of a parasitic slug over yours in any emergency. I've watched as worlds succumbed to plagues, asteroids, and other space-faring monsters, all because we were told not to interfere."
"Why?" Maud asked, tilting her head to the side.
"Because they're trying to create a utopia, Maud. Anyone who doesn't comply or fit in with society is nothing but an unenlightened savage. And anyone who tries to help those unenlightened primitive savages is a traitor who must be locked away from the rest of society." The mare sighed and rubbed Maud's hoof. "Enough about me, I've written many books about myself and my insights from my experiences and observations. You may read them later. For now, I want to hear more about you, my beautiful daughter."
"Did I inherit my stoicism from you?" Maud asked, scooting closer. It was an attempt at humor, which was recognized, just not acknowledged by either of them.
"The stoicism has been ingrained in my society for far too many generations," her mother explained. "Although, forced would be a much better word."
"Sounds awful," Maud nodded.
"That is why I didn't raise you." More tears were starting to trail down the old mare's neutral face. "You needed to be raised by an emotionally healthy family, not a brainwashed mare who is too old and too busy to change. I trust I made the right choice?"
"I don't know?" Maud blinked. "I never got a chance to find out."
"You have no idea how much that response means to me," her mother actually chuckled and sniffed. "Unlike you, I was trained since birth to suppress and ignore my emotions. We were, in all aspects, a race of sociopaths. That is no way of life for any decent person."
"You seem rather decent to me," Maud stated. The two mares just blinked at each other for a few moments.
"Confound these ponies, they have driven me to emotions," the old mare finally said with a sigh. "Living here has been good for me. Even better for you, as I can see. You're not so clouded by logic like I was at your age, I can see it in your eyes." She lifted her weak hoof up and stroked the young mare's forehead. "In every way, you put all other Vulcans to shame, truly an untamed beauty."
Maud blinked and blushed. "Untamed? I don't see how. I'm rather nonviolent. Mostly."
The response was an expressionless laugh. "You wouldn't understand, Maud. For that, I am grateful. You're full of life, though many others can't see it."
"My family sees it," Maud interjected matter-of-factly, in her own, unique way.
"Because they love you as one of their own," her mother smiled. "I only hope you can forgive me for giving you up. No parent should ever leave their child. No matter what."
"It's alright. You'd have made a terrible mother." Maud blinked. She noted the understanding gleam in the older mares eyes. She hoped she hadn't hurt her feelings. "But... I do think I would have liked it if you at least stayed close."
"Oh?" the older mare tilted her ears curiously. "I, too, have wondered. I wondered long and hard when I should have been working. I wondered what sort of stallion you might marry. What my grandchildren might have been like. I have remained disappointed in that field as of late."
Maud blinked and turned a little red in the cheeks. "I've found that I tend to creep out or bore most stallions."
"Most? Well, then what of the others?"
"A little too forward for taste," Maud dryly answered.
"Can't blame them, you are very beautiful, Maud." The older mare watched as Maud looked away, her blush deepening. "You're very expressive, Maud. On our homeworld, that would have been an unacceptable display."
"Emotions are illegal there?"
"No. Just shunned and treated like weaknesses. There are even ceremonies in which Vulcans can purge all emotion from their minds and bodies. Sometimes I thinking it would have done the galaxy a great service had the entire planet been swallowed by blackhole. That way, we would learn not to isolate ourselves or look down upon the 'unenlightened' races."
Maud nodded. "You feel strongly about this."
Her mother nodded. "I do indeed. Now, may I request a rather personal favor from you?"
Maud thought a moment. What could it be? After mulling it over she shrugged and blinked. "I don't see why not?"
"May I hug you?"
Maud blinked again. And again. And again. "What?"
The older mare nodded. "Please. Let me hug you. It would make me... feel... good. I want to hold my daughter one last time."
Maud complied. Slowly, so as not to tangle herself in the various tubes and wires. She didn't feel nervous at all, something really felt reassuring as she snuggled in close to the older mare, who wrapped her hooves about her body in a gentle embrace.
"Your muscles are very well toned."
"It comes form working with rocks all day," Maud replied as she felt the mare gentle rub her in a warm, motherly fashion. She almost felt as though she could fall asleep right there. But, that would be rude. "Though, is it partially due to... you?"
The older mare answered to the affirmative and nuzzled her daughter's mane. "More of your father, actually. He would have loved to have met you. But, he died in the crash."
"He probably would have been as busy as you were," Maud suggested. "In the end, you both probably would have given me up anyway."
"How very logical of you, daughter," the mare sighed in distaste. "Don't ever make my mistake, Maud. Promise me you'll find a nice stallion with whom you'll have many babies, and that you'll always be there for all of them."
Maud felt her face heat up, but she complied nonetheless. "Sure. I can do that. Just need to find a willing stallion."
"That's all I wanted to hear," her mother actually chuckled as she gave the young mare a weak hug. "My dearest Maud. Love of my life. My beacon of hope for this world's future, and the future of our race, live long and prosper, my beautiful daughter."
"I shall give it my absolute best," Maud said, unable to get rid of the blush from her face.
...
...
...
"Mother?"
...
"Mother?" Maud shifted her position in alarm to see what was the matter. She froze when she the old mare, silent and unmoving, a contented smile upon her face. Not long after, Maud found herself expressing emotions as well.