//------------------------------//
// Men on the Moon 
// Story: Of Vodka and Cider 
// by UglyTurnip 
//------------------------------//

Takeo idly tapped his fingers against the metal wall of the cockpit and let out a bored sigh. There was no telling how long he had been trapped on this ship with the rambling madman; all he knew is that it had been far too long. What he wouldn't give to be in the company of zombies again, at least they would be more personable than his present company. He reasoned that there were probably zombies on the moon, too. Hell knows they were everywhere else. If that was the case, he welcomed the upcoming bloodshed.

"Look at the pretty buttons, Takeo. Oooooh, I really like this one! It's red!"

That is, if Richtofen's antics didn't get them killed first. He glanced to his left with a raised eyebrow. Richtofen sat eagerly in the pilot's chair, spinning himself around in circles. The only noises inside the cramped cockpit were an occasional beep and the creaking noise that Richtofen's chair made. The doctor, occupied with his more pressing concern, was ignoring their trajectory of their course. To be fair, he didn't exactly have a reason to. The moon loomed brightly in the distance, surrounded by the distant glows of several stars. Takeo briefly wondered if Nikolai was somewhere out there in deep space, floating among the cosmos. The mental image that formed in his head caused him to chuckle slightly.

"So many buttons!" Exclaimed Richtofen as he pressed one at random. "I love to press them!"

"Doctor?" Takeo broke his silence.

Richtofen turned to face him with a curious stare. "Ja?"

"Have you ingested any drugs? You seem to be acting more foolish than usual."

There was an awkward silence as Richtofen suddenly stopped messing around. "I don't think so. I'm just excited, very excited. Griffin Station is an wonderful place in space," he then gasped as a sudden realization dawned upon him. "I should write that one down. It could be our slogan!"

"I'm starting to regret leaving Dempsey behind," Takeo muttered quietly. "Hey doctor," He spoke up. "I think we should worry more about landing safely. Are you sure you know how to fly this rocket?"

Richtofen crossed his arms and stubbornly stuck out his lower lip. "Are you sure you know how to fly this rocket?" He mocked with a pseudo-Japanese accent. "Ja, of course I do! It was a, er, requirement for all high-ranking members of Group 935. Trust me, Takeo, this rocket is in good hands."

"Warning: Approaching Griffin Station Landing Pad Gamma! Prepare for landing!"

"What?" Richtofen questioned. "But this is a Russian ship. How do they know about Griffin Station?"

"Like how the cosmodrone's loudspeaker was in English?" Takeo mentioned. "I don't even care about such things anymore," The rocket, now caught in the moon's gravitational pull, began to approach at a faster velocity. "Now's not the time to philosophize, though."

"Right," agreed Richtofen as he tapped away on the various buttons on the dashboard. "I'm on it."

Takeo heard the fwoosh of the main thrusters and saw the surface of the moon approaching at much more rapid rate. His eyes widened, which was a rare occasion for the samurai.

"Doctor!?"

"Sorry!" Richtofen exclaimed, yanking back on a joystick as far as it would go. "I would suggest holding on to something!"

Takeo closed his eyes and did his best to ride out the resulting flip without vomiting. All he could do was silently beg the spirits to spare his life. After a minute of agonizing suspense punctuated by several violent jerks of the ship, all noises and pressures suddenly ceased. Takeo opened one terrified eye, discovering that the ship had landed safely, although it was more than 50 meters from the intended landing pad.

Richtofen breathed a sigh of relief. "Everything went better than expected," He stated victoriously as he rose from his chair and made his way to the back of the ship. Takeo, still slightly shaken from the near-death experience, reluctantly followed him. The portion of the ship they were on was relatively small, detached from the rest of the shuttle and designed specifically for lunar landings. It was finely constructed with dark metal panels and lit with a prototype fluorescent lighting. As much as Takeo hated to admit it, he admired the excellent craftsmanship. The two super-soldiers stopped abruptly in front of a small closet. Two "gently-used" P.E.S. suits hung from the racks, waiting to be put to good use. Takeo caught a whiff of stale sweat, causing him to emit a disgusted cough.

"Do we really have to wear these?" Takeo protested. "Aren't there any clean pairs?"

"Not as far as I know," Richtofen grabbed the right one. "We should count ourselves lucky that we even have any at all."

Takeo reluctantly snatched the remaining suit. "I'll go get dressed."

Richtofen gave a perverted smile and playfully jabbed Takeo's ribs. "Aww, c'mon Takeo, let me watch!"

Takeo took a few steps back. "Absolutely not!"

Richtofen cackled. "Hey, I'm just kidding! Just come out when you're ready."

Takeo returned to the cockpit and tapped at the electronic pad beside it, closing the door so Richtofen wouldn't get any funny ideas. He began to dress himself as quickly as he could. More importantly, however, he could finally think in peace. He wondered what exactly Richtofen was planning, though he knew that the doctor was up to something. Here they were, about to explore an abandoned top-secret lunar base. With everything he had seen so far, Takeo knew for certain that something sinister lingered, something Richtofen either wanted to obtain or control. Honestly, he could not say that he wasn't nervous. After all, he no longer had the aid of Dempsey, and though Dempsey was indeed idiotic and dishonorable, he was trustworthy. Hell, Takeo wouldn't have minded Nikolai's company; at least his Russian rival wasn't evil. Well, he murdered his wives, but that wasn't quite as evil as unleashing a zombie apocalypse. The fate of the world rested in his hands now. If he didn't stop Richtofen here, there's no telling what kind of evil he would unleash.

"Takeo!" Richtofen's effeminate voice echoed from behind the metal door, followed by a few harsh knocks. "Are you done yet?"

Takeo drew in a sigh. He had just finished dressing, but was nowhere near finished thinking. "Yes!" He called back, staring out of the glass window. He had a rather scenic view of Earth, but now was not time to enjoy it. He removed his Imperial Army hat and wrapped an arm around his helmet. He opened the door with the other.

Richtofen was, not surprisingly, dressed in his suit as well. Like Takeo, he had ditched his military cap. "Let's not waste anymore time, my Japanese friend, we have a grand scheme-, er, I mean, world to save! Ja!" He then put on the helmet without another word, probably in an attempt to hide his shame.

Takeo rolled his eyes and put on his helmet. "Whatever, doctor, let's just go."

Richtofen gave a thumbs up. "Sounds good to me!"

The two of them marched to the back of the ship, climbed down a ladder, and arrived at the airlock. Opening it, Takeo stuck a gloved hand out into the vacuum that awaited him, as if he was testing it, and then walked out. Richtofen followed, cheerfully leaping outwards into the air.

"That's one small step for Takeo, one giant leap for Edward!" Richtofen exclaimed as he flew by Takeo, who was simply walking as best as he could in the low gravity.

Takeo let out an annoyed groan and followed the mad doctor as he made his way to the space station that loomed in the distance.