"Hrmmm... mmrfmmff..."
Rainbow's eyes were open, for what it was worth.
She drifted ahead—not very evenly—with her wings unfolded like limp sails. This caused her to dip and sag in her flight often. More than once, her sensitive belly brushed against leaves and branches of the trees below.
"Mrmmmfff... dang it..." She looked up. The stars stabbed at her eyes. She shut her lids, but she didn't like the fresh memories still fermenting there.
With a seething breath, the mare dipped again. This time, the trees had vanished, so she struck nothing but air.
It wouldn't last for long. The rustic buildings of northern Ponyville drifted by. Rainbow Dash was oblivious to them—until her peripheral vision caught a familiar windowfront.
"Grnfff... hmmm?" She pivoted about. Whump! She flew backwards into a buzzing lamppost. "Augh!" Her voice echoed like a gunshot across the sleepy street. "Friggin' A! Watch where you're... b-buzzing... chuuuu..." The mare rubbed her eyes, teetered, then blinked ahead of her.
Silence.
She bore a dumb... dumb smile.
A pub's dim windows loomed in front of her. The neon sign was off, and a dangling poster read "CLOSED" in the front window.
All was a blur before her rolling eyes.
"Heheheheheh—HIC!" She waved a hoof before her muzzle. "What gives, guys? The crickets are out. Can't even be morning—HIC—yet." She stopped flapping her wings. Instantly, her numb limbs crumpled beneath her. "Mrmmff! Dang it! Who lifted the gr-ground? Guhhh..."
The struggled to get up, crawling... wriggling. At last, she pulled herself forward by her grip to a bench.
"Grnnngh... mrmmfff..."
When she lifted, she was staring so close to the window that her fuzzy nostrils formed clouds of condensation against the glass. Observing this stirred something angry inside of her, like a bull seeing red.
"Hey... heeeeey..." She braced herself against the doorframe. "What gives? They... hic... think they're closed. You talk 'em into this, girls?"
Rainbow Dash tilted her head left and right, squinting into the darkness of the bar interior.
"Hey! Hey Joe! Joedemus! Buckiah! Nicklebuck—snkkkkt... heeheehee!" She leaned against the glass, drooling. A deep wheeze escaped her breath. "Whatever your name is! Come onnnn! Open up! I've got bits, buddy! I can cover the tab!"
Silence, save for the chirping of insects beyond the nearby bushes.
"Hmmmff... hey!" Rainbow blinked. "Hey?" She frowned, tapping her hoof against the glass. "Not funny! Open up, dude! It's the law! The... mrmmmff... cider law. Don't you think? Right? Princess Celestia and—HIC—the Quorum of Tankards... or s-something..."
She pulled at the door handle.
The entrance refused to budge.
So she tugged and yanked and threw her petite weight into it.
The door merely rattled in its frame.
"Nrnnngh... come on... open... up!" Rainbow Dash finally lost her grip. Slipping, she fell back on her fuzzy flanks with a jolt. "Ooomf!" A frown crossed her muzzle as she glanced at her limp fetlocks. "Dang it, Zecora! Stop making out with... Nier... Noira... Nezbit... friggin'..." She rolled over, pressing her shivering body back up onto all fours. "Nocturne of the... grnnngh... Flatulence. Bet you like that one, Lyra." A giggle. "What would Lyraaaaaa dooooo?"
Her ears twitched. She looked past the bench.
A metal garbage pale sat in the dewy grass.
"... ... ..." Rainbow Dash grinned wickedly. "Heheheh—HIC—perfect."
She trotted a zig-zagged path towards the container. Then, with an extraordinary amount of grunting, she hoisted the thing up in her forelimbs and twirled in the direction of the pub.
"I said it was not funny! But you didn't listen!" She threw her twitching muscles into a forward lurch. "Now... open up!"
The metal can flew from her grasp and—
CRKKKK! The front window of the pub fractured down the center. Almost instantly, a blaring alarm pierced the heavens. WREE-WREE-WREE!
"Awww—HIC—fudge!" Rainbow winced. Ears drooping, she looked in every direction.
The windows of shops and apartments across the street rattled. Dogs began barking. One by one, lights flicked to life.
"Crud crud crud crud!" Rainbow scampered, flapped her wings, ran into a tree, and then flew off in a crooked arch. "P-put it on the tab! Guhhhhh!" And she disappeared beyond the next row of houses, leaving bedlam and broken glass behind her.