//------------------------------// // Chapter 2 // Story: Of Boredom and Co-Conspirators // by Nightmare723764 //------------------------------// <<>> After much begging, pleading, and much to my eternal shame crying; I escaped getting a catheter and being trussed-up like a psychotic Christmas turkey. Granted, I had to put up with a “Watcher” now, a rather large unicorn… stallion I guess? “Eh, doesn’t really matter anyway” I thought stretching out like a cat and yawning in this cutesy manner that came to me naturally. The unicorn is under orders to sedate me if I started to act up again, which I won’t. I got most of my panic and paranoia out earlier, and now I’m starting to feel that bone-deep sense of exhaustion. Honestly waking up as an entirely different species of creature is very tiring, honestly the only reason I lasted so long is through bloody stubbornness and adrenaline. Oh and rage, best not forget that! Yawning again I look up at my watcher, “Yeah, hey big guy! I’m going to sleep! Go take a… coffee break or whatever…” I grumbled. Ignoring any replies of the watcher I quickly burrowed myself in the covers of my strangely comfortable hospital bed. “Ain't hospital beds suppose to be uncomfortable and shit? Eh fuck it…” Grumbling lightly I closed my eyes and went to sleep. <<>> I chuckled as Shifty went to sleep. ”And there he goes… I’m starting to get tired as well. Damn, that means I’m waking up soon… too bad, this was a fun one, even if magic is… weird… in this dream. I hope I dream a continuation of this at some point, trolling these ‘Ponies’ is too much fun!” I look over to Shifty’s babysitter, “Hey, are you gonna be watching us sleep all night?” I ask him. “I gotta make sure your brother there doesn’t wake up and cause even more trouble, so yes. Don’t worry, I’m used to all-nighters.” I hum thoughtfully for build-up to my reveal, “Well… alright, not like it would be the first time… just note that you owe us 20 coins should you see anything… ‘nice’...” I state with a half-lidded stare. The babysitter guard stared at me wide eyed and slowly turned green in the face and I inwardly chuckled, “Yup, gonna miss that.” “Niiiiight~” I drawled seductively… I couldn’t resist getting one more in after all. I laid down on the bed and fell asleep to his disturbed spluttering… music to my ears. Now it’s time to wake up in the boring world… <<>> Cadence flopped in a decidedly un-princess-like manner onto her bed. Her husband Shining Armor watching her curiously, wondering what could’ve tired her own so. Putting his book down Shining Armor cuddled up to his wife and nuzzled her. “What’s wrong Cadence?” Shining Armor asked quietly, “I’ve never seen you so stressed before.” “It’s just… there are two foals in the hospital.” Cadence started, “They’ve been sexually abused for years, they were even pimped out by their parents!!” Shining Armor’s eyes widened at that and he hugged Cadence tightly to his barrel as if to ward away the thoughts that plagued his wife. After a few minutes of cuddling Shining Armor took a breath. “I wish I could say something to make you feel better Cadence but I can’t.” He started, “But I swear on Celestia and Luna’s manes I’ll find the monsters responsible for this!” Cadence nodded and closed her eyes, eventually drifting off into a very uneasy and nightmare ridden sleep. Luna’s work was cut out for her that night… <<>> Luna drifted along the dreamlands doing her sworn duty, though tonight she kept her eye out on Cadence’s and Twilight’s dreams. Though never Tia, her mind is too well guarded for her to enter. However, even as she dispelled nightmares her thoughts drifted to the two unfortunate foals. Shifting Space and Inanis… “It’s utterly disgusting what happened to these foals!” She fumed angrily, “Nay! Tis pure EVIL to do such things to innocents like foals!!” Truthfully, probably naively, Luna had thought she and her sister had stomped out those sort of heinous actions! To hear it happened in the north of Equestria disgusted Luna, she could imagine how Tia felt! She always hated foal abuse and molestation with a fierce unholy hatred! “Tia will be in such a mood for the foreseen future.” Luna thought rather glumly, having experienced Tia’s temper when she was in one of her moods before, “In hindsight switching all of Tia’s cakes with sugar-free equivalent was a very bad call. But at the time it was just sooo funny!” However her feeble attempts to distract herself from the foals’ horrifying situation were dashed when she sense a slew of nightmares coming. And Luna knew, without even peering into the nightmares in question, who was having them. All the ponies who learned of Shifting Spaces’ and Inanis’ situation. “Can’t say I wasn’t expecting this. Or surprised.” She thought with a sigh as she went about dispelling the nightmares as there was simply no way she could change them into something remotely pleasant. Sometimes it really doesn’t pay to be the Princess of Dreams… “Hmm… perhaps I shall visit these foals’ dreams? Mayhaps divine the location of their home?” The Night princess mused as she went about dispelling the nightmares. Decision made, Luna decided to delve into the dreams of Shifting Space first given just how violent a reaction he gave and his temporary break from reality back at the Canterlot Royal Hospital. Searching for a few minutes, which was a mere heartbeat in the real world, Luna located Shifting Space’s dreamscape. Taking a breath Luna steeled herself before she ‘invaded’ his dreamscape. “Really wish I could think of a better word than invade when I enter another’s dreamscape.” Luna thought dryly. In its natural, if anything in the dream world could be considered natural that is, state it’s akin to a… bubble-bath of sorts. All the bubbles being individual dreamscapes. Occasionally, when showing others said dreamscapes, Luna forced them into the shape of doors so as to not confuse those not used to Dream Magicks. Steeling herself once again Luna infiltrated, and how she hated to think of her actions like that, Shifting Space’s dream. It took her a few moments to reorient herself entering new dreamscapes, technically speaking, was always somewhat disorientating. Why Luna remembered entering one dreamscape and it was like wading through thick mud! After regaining her orientation Luna pushed further into the dreamscape, which oddly enough had more ‘layers’ than any other dreamscape she has entered, and when she finally reached the center of his dreamscape. Well… Luna now understood the depths of this foal’s issues. The foal was fighting, quite viciously and even murderously if Luna was entirely honest, armies of faceless stallions in armor. The armor obviously being influenced by his encounters with the guard. Shifting acted more like a rabid animal then a civilized pony! He even bit and torn into some of the stallions throats! And was he grinning!? “Oh dear sweet Mother…” Luna thought as she quickly exited the obvious nightmare before she found out if a Dream avatar can vomit or not! She stood in the infinite space of the Dreamworld, as she honestly couldn’t gather enough focus to shape the Hallway of Doors, and simply dry heaved. She had been in the dreams of some disturbed individuals but that took the cake! “And I still have one other dream to visit…” She thought with some dread.. Giving one final heave Luna steeled herself again and flew off to find Inanis’ dreamscape, praying to her Mother and anypony that could hear her that it wouldn’t be as disturbing as Shifting Space’s was! Somehow… she felt that her prayer wasn’t heard… After some sifting, and gently nudging some dreamscapes out of the way, she finally found Inanis’ dreamscape. Floating outside the ‘sphere’ Luna found herself trying to talk herself out of entering. After a few minutes she stamped and started huffing. “I am the Princess of the Night, Moon, and Dreams! I’ve fought Discord with my sister and countless other horrors! I will not be intimidated by the dreams of two disturbed little foals!” She thought, psyching herself up to enter the dreamscape. After another few moments she bit the bullet and entered the dreamscape. She found only abyss. Endless black in all directions; no matter, no light, no gravity, no time, no existence… just darkness, and the sound of rushing wind finding no purchase, despite there being no breeze here. There was an overwhelming pressure of eerie melancholy, of maddening silence, of the void. Luna could not bring herself to so much as think as she got swept along into the dream, such things did not matter, it not like she was truly aliv- there was a sudden, achingly slow thump that echoed throughout the space and jolted her out of her trance. ”Dangerous… too dangerous… I haven’t been so close to losing myself like that since the “Nightmare”... but what was that thump? There isn’t anything here to make a sou-” it sounded again, but slightly softer and quicker this time. “A… heartbeat? The colt’s heartbeat…? Well at least for that, this void is too close to ‘death’ as it is…” Luna muttered, while looking around for the aforementioned colt. After flying for several minutes, she finally saw Inanis sitting in the air, and flew up to him. <<>> I watched at the corner of my eye as an ‘Alicorn’ Pony came up to where I was sitting. Judging by her mane and tail, and assuming that names actually hold meaning for the ponies, I would assume this to be Princess Luna. ”I do wonder what she’s doing here though… the lucid dream ended, and I was already in the process of meditating to ensure I remember as many details of the dream as I can; so I could continue at a later date…” I thought. “... What troubles you foal?” Luna asked after a few moments, “Tis rare to find dreams such as this one…” ”Hmm… well, the least I could do at this point is fuck with her further, I’m already done meditating on the dream she’s from after all…” “I was just gazing into the abyss, waiting for it to gaze back into me… perhaps then, something would truly see.” I supplied poetically vague. ”Now, how will you interpret that? What direction will you send me to fuck with your mind with?” Luna frowned slightly, “... I gazed into the abyss once… all I received was madness and having my body subverted. There are more pleasant things to gaze into that wouldn’t drive you mad.” Luna replied quietly. I grinned, ”I can work with that.” “Ah, but you merely peered into the abyss; I was born in it, molded by it,” I mentally snickered, “The abyss looked into you and found you wanting, so it filled you with what you did not have. Should the abyss look into me, I can only guess how it would react at finding itself staring back.” I finished. ”Dear gods, this is so damn edgy! I can barely stop myself from laughing!” Luna blinked, “But… surely a part of you wishes to leave this abyss? Nothing good comes from it… and I’ve seen many good beings turned into monsters from gazing into it overlong.” She said quietly, clearly growing uncomfortable, “Nothing good comes from gazing into the abyss even for those that claim to be born of it.” She added a bit more firmly as if to bolster her own confidence. I chuckle, “Perhaps, if you do not embrace it. Madness is quite simply the most useful tool one could possibly have, but social stigma dictates we should shun it. In shunning one’s madness, one is at conflict with one’s self, and destroys themselves until they either shatter, or forget why they are warring with themselves. These result in being “Unstable”, and being “Crazy” respectively. I have long since accepted madness, the gift of the abyss, as a part of myself; we are not separate, we are not enemies, we are simply me. In this way, I have kept my madness and can use it as I like. ‘There is a fine line between genius and madness’ some… pony… once said, but what they did not realize is that they are 2 sides of the same coin. Genius is simply intellect, but Madness is originality and innovation; progress can not be truly made without both. Oh dear, I appear to have gone on a rant, what was your question?” I asked with a hidden smirk. Luna looked poleaxed at my little rant, “... What of your brother then?” She asked, apparently trying to change the subject or at least change the direction of the conversation. “Well… Shifty’s madness became… corrupted… by his rage. Madness is always painted in the colours of its wielder’s true feelings… my brother has held onto so much anger for so long that his madness has nearly become pure ‘wrath’, whereas mine is coloured more with ‘boredom’... well, boredom by the definition of ‘desire for entertainment’ anyway…” I answer, faking a thoughtful look. ”I’m not entirely certain about ‘Jack’ being as I said, but he certainly can act it naturally... and I was pretty truthful otherwise…” Luna rubbed her chin thoughtfully, “You… have given me much to think about Inanis.” Luna said after a few moments, “Perhaps… we can talk of this again sometime…” “In my dreams, or ‘reality’?” I snark with a chuckle, ”I do hope that she will remember this conversation in the dream ‘reality’, I’d hate for this conversation to go to waste…” Luna looked at me with this curious, almosting pitying, gaze for a brief second before it vanished, “In your dreams. I fear Tia and Cadence would do something brash if they listened in on us.” She said with a very faint smile. “Ah, under the impression that ‘Madness is evil, and serves no purpose but to corrupt good ponies’ or some tripe like that?” I ask with a chuckle. “It’s a stereotype and unfortunately a commonly held belief amongst my little ponies. A little madness never hurt anypony, like you said the line between Madness and Genius is razor thin. Starswirl the Bearded was very mad in his own way and he’s became the greatest wizard in history!” Luna said with a giggle, “Madness is only bad when it drives you to do horrible things. Your brother’s madness qualifies as the bad kind.” She added with a frown. “My brother’s madness is only bad if there was no warrant for it… and currently, there is still warrant for it. Should it stop being necessary, I will help him reign it in. However, I am curious… you claimed earlier that nothing good ever comes from gazing into the abyss, that it drives one to madness, then just now claimed that madness is a good thing… am I truly so charismatic as to change the philosophy of royalty so easily?” I asked cheekily. Luna just rolled her eyes and snorted in amusement, “While you are cute you’re not that cute.” She said with a smile smile, “I am impulsive and rather judgemental, problems I’m working on correcting, and I tend to see the worst in others. Sometimes I need to be reminded just because I’ve seen others driven to madness and do horrible things doesn’t mean being a little mad is a bad thing. For example my sister is a bit mad! She somehow manages to keep the nobility under control, thwart all their attempts to increase their own power, and somehow manages to make it seem like they’re benefiting and getting the best of her! You have to be slightly mad to do that for thousands of years and not snap!” “I see, so it was my silver tongue rather than my unyielding charisma that swayed your opinion; I’ll keep that in mind!” I say, childishly sticking out my tongue that I coloured silver with lucid-dreaming, “And thousands of years? Do Alicorns have unusually long lifespans or something?” Luna giggled, “The most common misconception is that Alicorns, True and ‘Lesser’ ones alike, are immortal. Which if the furthest thing from the truth. Alicorns are Timeless, we don’t suffer and die from old age. However despite this we are still as vulnerable as any mortal being. We are only heartier and fight off illness more effectively.” Luna explained with a smile, “Though it is a trial being so long lived. Seeing friends and loved ones wither away… our lot in life if truly a depressing one…” She added with a sigh. “So… you’re saying that the only lasting relationships we could have would be with other Alicorns? Well then…” I say with a roguish smile, “It’s a good thing you’re quite cute.” ”Please be the easily-embarrassed type! They’re always fun!” Luna blushed slightly and she giggled behind her hoof, “Charmer! However you’re much too young for me. Maybe after a few years. How old are you anyway?” Luna asked curiously. “Well, let me put it this way. Shifty is almost half my age older than me, despite his size making him look younger than he is.” I answer unhelpfully, “And if we truly are timeless, why couldn’t I simply keep trying to gain your affections, even if it takes centuries? A ‘few years’ isn’t exactly much of a wait.” I add with a wink. Luna giggled even more and blushed harder, “A ‘few years’ in this case is just until you’re physically mature.” She said looking anywhere other than Inanis, “The chances of you getting closer to my actually age are impossible unless you start dabbling in Chronos magick, which is foolhardy in the extreme even for masters in the craft, or use an aging potion which is only temporary.” She added, “Though I am curious… how are you an Alicorn when your brother is but a Unicorn? A Unicorn with large potential for magic but still…?” “I have no idea, I was just born like this, and he was just born like that. Heck, for all I know, he is an Alicorn, but was born with a deformity that resulted in him not having wings.” I state, “Maybe we’re not siblings at all, and are actually just unholy spawns of the abyss with some unsuspecting mares?” I add cheekily. “Cheeky foal!” Luna said with a giggle, “We actually have tests for such things. You’d be surprised just how frequent a mare that dabbles in the Occult and wakes up with foal and no knowledge of the father. And we did the same to you and Shifting Space. He’s one hundred percent Unicorn. Which is rather unfortunate… it’s never pleasant to outlive family… be it through blood or bond.” “Wow… maybe I should stop giving that many half-lidded stares to the abyss, if it’s knocking up that many mares!” I say with a hearty laugh, “And as for Shifty, well… I don’t think he could handle eternity regardless… I’ve always felt time going by far faster than most ponies, months seeming like days… I guess my mind is simply hard-wired for my potential lifespan. But Shifty, he’s ruled by his emotions, and eternity would destroy him as all crumbles to dust around him…” ”Again, don’t even have to lie… First time my unique sense of time has had any relevance in one of these dreams though…” Luna nodded in understanding, “A word to the wise. Never assume. My niece Cadence? She used to be a Pegasus but ascended to Alicornhood when she gained her cutie mark.” Luna said with a smile, “Honestly I’m still trying to work out how her cutie mark affected her ascension.” She added thoughtfully. “She did seem the emotional type, but she also had far more control over those emotions than Shifty has… certainly, that can change when he’s older, but not now. Though, I guess there is the potential for him to ascend later on, should that change.” “Perhaps. There is always a chance.” Luna said with a smile, then the ‘world’ shook, “Hmm… seems you’re waking up. Well I must say this was a very enlightening… if somewhat unnerving conversation.” She added diplomatically. “Well, either that or I’m hungry and that was my stomach,” I say with a slight grin, “And I enjoyed this conversation too. May there be countless more, and may we never be bored of each-other’s voices!” I add while toasting a norse flagon full of mead that suddenly appeared and chugging it. Luna smiled and giggle before lifting her own wine glass in toast, “Here-here!” She said with an amused snort before she drank her drink and disappeared with a pop. “Heh, I’m definitely gonna enjoy these dreams if I can manage to continue them.” I mutter out loud, before gazing once more into the abyss, waiting to wake up again. <<>> I awoke with a jerk, snort, and a jaw-cracking yawn. Sitting up in my bed I wiped my eyes, freezing when I felt fur instead of skin. Gods, I was hoping the whole being a horse/unicorn thingy was a dream. Gods fucking damn it! However it was too early to get mad and honestly I just had the best sleep in my life! Back on Earth I was an absolute insomniac! I was lucky to get thirty hours of sleep throughout a week! I gave another jaw-cracking yawn. “Now… who do I have to suck off to get some coffee around here?” I muttered as I rubbed my eyes and I tried to wake up. “Um…” My watcher said as he stared at me with wide eyes and a green muzzle. “Oh, it’s you then? Come on then, whip it out.” I say sarcastically. I blinked and had to gather my wits, I’m rather proud of myself cause I did pull my shit together rather quickly! Hmm… I need me a good laugh to start the day… “Come on dude! Honestly it wouldn’t be the first time. And at least it’s my choice this time. Getting skullfucked is not pleasant.” I said dryly, “So either whip it out or go get some fucking coffee already!” The stallion quickly trotted off decidedly more green then red much to mine and I assume Inanis’ amusement. Seeing as no… pony, I guess that’d be the right terminology, was around I decided to ask Inanis something. “Yeah… did you feel somepony poking around in your head last night? Cause I swear I think I saw an alicorn with a moon on her ass for a few seconds there.” I asked curiously. There was some chuckling from Inanis as he got up, “Yeah, I’m pretty sure that was Princess Luna, she was pretty fu-” He suddenly stopped talking, and his eyes went wide before whispering “H-how-why-what-fuck-where-WHAT!? Why am I STILL IN THIS… dream… oh no.” I then watched as he bit himself in the wing, yelped, started muttering to himself in gibberish, and had his eyes moving rapidly with fully dilated pupils… it was kinda funny. “Dude… when I was fighting every… pony yesterday I got knocked around pretty bad too. Dreams aren’t suppose to hurt like that.” I said, “So… unless this is one lucid fucking dream… this is all real…” I added somewhat distractedly as the impact of my words actually hit me. I wasn’t the exemplar of responsibility back on earth, hell I honestly needed a damn Keeper to ensure I didn’t burn down the apartment complex! But I did have responsibilities! I was a godfather, why my cousin actually name me godfather when he knew of my issues I’ll never know, and what about my mom? And my job!? … Eh fuck my job. My boss was an asshole and everyone I worked with were jackasses… “Oh fuck me… I might never see… mom again…” I thought with wide eyes. “So… um… what’d Princess Luna wanna talk to you about?” I asked trying to distract myself cause if I started thinking about our situation I would start crying. I’m a momma’s boy and I’m not afraid to admit it… “Wha- oh, umm… let’s see… the abyss, madness, pregnant mares, immortality, casual flirting, and some mead… so the usual topics, really.” he answers, with a slightly forced grin. “Yeah… that’s cool…” I said with a sigh, “Dude… this situation is royally fucked up…” I groaned as I face… hooved as I tried my damnedest not to cry. “Indeed… well, it could be worse… I could be something other than an Alicorn, and thus apparently Royalty, if convention continues, and having Eternal Youth! Oh right, you’re a unicorn… well, at least you can truthfully say you’re always horny!” He teased, still with nervous-looking wide eyes. I gave a rather hysterical sounding yet genuinely amused laugh, “Yeah… I can can’t I? And you’re getting eternal youth and being royalty? Gods why does every… pony other than me get cool shit like that? Okay so… we gotta make the best outta our situation… I can do that…” I said before I started doing some deep breathing exercises, it’s just too goddamn early to be having a panic attack! “Well, seeing as you’re my… ‘Brother’... I might be able to swing you being royalty too… maybe…?” Inanis said, seemingly beginning to calm down. “Yeah… so how badly did you screw with Luna?” I asked curiously, “Anything I need to do to keep up the act?” “Nah, I followed the rules of a Silver Tongue… namely; Never lie, but always bend the truth. You’re good. Heck, most of the discussion was a philosophical debate… Hmm… actually, there is one thing…” Inanis states, thoughtfully. “What?” I asked curiously. He gives me a mischievous yet roguish grin, “I call dibs on Luna for when we’re old enough. She’s good for conversation, and is honestly kinda cute… in an equine way… thank the gods I’m pansexual, or suddenly changing species would be really awkward.” I tilted my head at that, for some reason feeling competitive for whatever strange reason but I pushed it away deciding to think on it later. Stretching and cracking my neck I just shrugged. “Well… that’s your prerogative I guess.” I said with a shrug, “I haven’t really talked to her so I can’t say one thing or another.” I added as I rubbed my head. “Hey hey hey, you said ‘anything’, remember?” He said cheekily. I blinked and rubbed my head, “Bro it’s early, I just woke up, and I haven’t had any coffee. Please just humor me and tell me what you or I meant by ‘anything’ please?” I asked with a slight whine in my voice. “You said, and I quote, ‘Anything I,’ as in you, ‘need to do to keep up the act?’; and I did kind of announce such intentions to her last night with some casual flirting… so technically, you letting me have her would ‘help keep up the act’.” Inanis elaborated. I just blinked and shrugged, “Well… good for you I guess. Honestly I need to get use to be a hor… unicorn before I started ogling any… pony. Man... the lexicon here is going to be a pain to get use to…” I grumbled, “Man where’s my goddamn coffee??” “So, that’s a yes to the promise then?” He insisted, with an eerie purr in his throat that reminded me strangely of a devil trying to gain a contract in some movie I watched… meh, I’m too tired for this shit. … “Um… yeah. Sure. Whatever.” I muttered, “To early for this shit… WHERE’S THE GODDAMN COFFEE!?” I shouted in irritation. “Good” Inanis purred with a rather wide grin… that probably would have been creepy had I actually cared enough to look. Eventually the Watcher returned with a styrofoam cup with something. I was too tired to really give a damn so I took the cup and chugged it. After I finished I looked at the Watcher. “... That was apple juice… can I have some coffee? Please…” That last word was oddly painful to say… “Sorry foal. Coffee’s from grown ups. Besides it’ll stunt your growth, you don’t want to be a shorty for the rest of your life do you?” The stallion replied with a shrug. “... Shorty…?” My eye started to twitch and my cheek developed a tic. A light cough came from Inanis, “A word of warning for the future; Shifty hates any reference to his… stature… and he legitimately does need his caffeine in the mornings or he takes forever to wake up… Perhaps some Black Tea, if we can’t have coffee? I personally prefer tea anyway, especially Chai, Chamomile, and Vanilla Rooibos.” The watcher chewed his lip in thought, “Well… I guess tea ain’t so bad. Tartarus sake we got plenty of it… bloody nobles…” The watcher muttered as he trotted off to get some hot tea. “There, now you can have your caffeine, get to experience the wonders of tea, and there will be hope for you to yet grow to be as big and strong as me!” The smug bastard teased. “... You know one of my ‘clients’ was a sick fucker,” I said airily, noticing the guards just outside the door, “He loved to starve me and feed me meat. Bastard was a graverobber too so… food for thought…” I added whimsically. “I had the same client, though I don’t recall him being a graverobber…” He replied cheekily, after following my line-of-sight. “Well he did have a twin you know.” I retorted with a small smile, “You know… this is kinda fun actually!” I thought as I heard one of the guards running, or is it galloping, to a bathroom. “A pair of twins, both with the same meat fetish, and one is a cannibal from the sounds of things…? Gods, who the flying fuck raised them? One could be an awful coincidence, but both just paints a disturbing picture of how they were raised… hey, maybe they were like us, and were ‘continuing the tradition’, as it were?” Inanis spun the tale masterfully. “I think he was a necrophile instead of a cannibal. But regardless it’s fucked up no matter how you look at it.” I said with a shrug, “The disturbing thing is as I would ‘eat’ he was talk dirty like I was eating him. I think he had a major thing for Vore.” I added with a grimace of disgust as I honestly couldn’t stand Vore or any of its variations. “Hey, what’s that face for? Vore isn’t too bad!” he stated with a laugh, “but a necrophile, eh… shit, guess we should get tested, make sure we have no maggots growing in there… well, they’ve probably given us a full physical already with their magic; so I don’t think we really have to worry…” At the mental image of maggots in my… well I started dry heaving over the bed! Oh god! Brain bleach! I need some brain bleach! Or some fucking head trauma A-S-A-FUCKING-P!! Of course, my dearest ‘brother’ is just sitting there chuckling at my reaction, with a smug look in his eyes saying ‘Hah! I won!’... bastard. “You’re an asshole.” I managed to rasp out between dry heaves. He pointedly looks back at his behind, “Yup, though with an adorable face, 2 ‘horns’, 2 jewels, 2 wings, and 4 hooves attached… despite some clients wishing the rest were missing.” He replies with no small amount of snark. I just grumbled curses and tried to calm down. Sometimes it just isn’t worth getting out of bed in the morning… <<>> Luna sat down in a small private dining room with Tia, Cadence, and Twilight. All of us had our preferred morning drink of choice. Black coffee, though Luna’s was only half-caffeinated as a java’d up Night Princess is a terrifying thing to behold. “So… last night I saw some disturbing things and had a very interesting conversation.” Luna said with a faint blush recalling Inanis’ casual flirting. “How so sister?” Tia asked curiously, both at her words and the faint almost invisible blush on her muzzle. Cadence and Twilight looked as interested as they could, they wouldn’t be able to fully join without two pots of coffee in them both. None of the princesses were morning ponies in the slightest. “Well, I was curious about the foals found yesterday, and had hoped to find some hints as to where they lived before… so I ‘invaded’ their dreams…” Luna explained, “They were… not what I expected…” “And what did you expect exactly Lulu?” Tia asked, somewhat disappointed by her invasion of their privacy but not entirely upset. Somepony had to do it after all. “Well… I was expecting foals to be trapped by ceaseless nightmares…” Luna said, “But their dreams were very… unique… to say the least.” “How so *yawn* auntie?” Cadence asked tiredly as she sipped at her scalding hot coffee. Luna then proceeded to describe in detail Shifting Space’s dream, or nightmare; Luna wasn’t entirely sure now that she thought about it, and explained just how much joy Shifting showed as he brutally maimed, butchered, and slaughtered the army of faceless stallions. “Oh my…” Cadence said covering her muzzle with her hooves, all thoughts of coffee lost to her, “And Inanis?” “Inanis was… well his dream was nothing. I mean literally an endless void of nothing. And once I found him, the scenery did not change in the slightest… but we did end up having a philosophical debate of all things, talked a little bit about him and his brother… which netted very little information now that I think of it… I told him about Alicorn timelessness since he is one, and then he… he…” Luna started to trail off with a slight blush, “Well… he kind of started flirting with me…?” Tia and Cadence started giggling while Twilight jerked, “Huh? What’d I miss?” She asked. Cadence giggled even harder, “Did you fall asleep with your eyes open?” She asked with an amused smile. Twilight just blushed and ducked her head making the three princesses giggle. Tia smirked and looked at Luna, “My… this is probably your youngest suitor yet dear sister.” She teased, “Not even going to wait till he’s sixteen? Oh my you’re quite the cradle-robber!~” “Wha- I am not going to- he’s too young! … He will be quite handsome once he is old enough though… but not until then!” Luna stated with a huff. “Um… Lulu,” Tia started, both amused and hesitant, “I was just joking, but I’m quite surprised you’re taking a colt’s crush seriously, he must have made quite the impression!” she snickered. Luna blushed, “Well sister you know how hard it is to keep a relationship when you know you’ll outlive your special somepony!” She said with a huff, “Besides… he is rather cute in this odd and slightly creepy way.” “... Quite the impression indeed, dear sister. You’re almost talking like it’s a done deal, and he or you won’t change your minds later…” Celestia said, with a hint of worry in her tone. “I haven’t decided anything sister!” Luna said fuming, “All I’m saying is that he’s cute and that is it! Stop looking for things that aren’t there!?” She added with a scowl. “Alright, alright… I’ll stop,” Tia sighed ruefully, “I just wanted to make sure that you aren’t just latching onto him due to some latent loneliness from… well…” Luna’s eye twitched, “Dear sister.” She said through gritted teeth, “While I am lonely, if I did ‘latch’ onto him can you blame me? It’s been five… bucking… years and the only ponies that talk to me are merely trying to curry favor from you, or are in this room! So ex-bucking-scuse me for enjoying an intelligent debate with somepony that doesn’t seem to worshiping the bucking ground you trot on!” She hissed. “Luna! I didn’t mean… my apologies… I’ll let you do as you wish in this case…” Celestia sighed, then added with a slight smirk, “Just keep it foal-friendly until he’s of age, alright?” she snickered. “You’re ‘Molestia’ not I, sister.” Luna deadpanned “Really? I could have sworn there was that one time that you dyed your coat light-pink…” Tia implied. “That was because you bucking changed my shampoo you bucking damned troll!” Luna retorted with no real heat in her voice, “So anyway… what are we going to do with the two brothers? We can’t just send them back home, even if we knew where it is.” “Um… couldn’t we just… stick them with a foster family?” Twilight suggested. Luna scoffed, “Twilight, no offense but… I seriously doubt most ponies could handle those two little madfoals.” She said with a smile to remove the sting of her scoff, “The potential for violence from Shifting alone makes it too dangerous to put him with anypony. Something could set him off and he may suddenly find himself guilty of ponyslaughter.” Twilight rubbed her chin and started thinking of alternatives for the two heavily traumatized brothers. Sadly most alternatives weren’t really possible unless Shifting at the very least was on heavy-duty anti-psychotics. At least Inanis was in complete control of himself from what she’s heard. “What if one of us adopts them? If nothing else, Alicorn magic should be capable of restraining Shifting if he gets out of control…?” Twilight suggested. “Not me,” Luna stated, “It would cause a political headache if I really did end up with Inanis later on…” “... I’ll do it!” Cadence said, “I’ll adopt them!” “Are you sure?” Celestia asked with a frown, “Your magic is geared towards love and empathic magicks. I’m not sure if you or Shining could handle Shifting is he starts losing it.” “He was the Captain of the Guard, and he has his shields to hold Shifting in… he should be fine. As for me, I’m sure my magicks could help calm him down.” Cadence said with full confidence… probably quite naively. “Hmm, well; you do have the most free time aside from Twilight since the Crystal Empire now has its High Council running most of it, and you would be bringing a father-figure with you…” Celestia tilted her head in thought, “And you might be onto something. Heh, if you can calm a rampaging Hydra I think you can handle one magically powerful madfoal.” “Then it’s decided!” Cadence declared happily, “I’m gonna be a mother!” She squeed, dismissing the the odd shiver she felt move through her spine as she said those words.