//------------------------------// // Hopeless Admittance // Story: Earning Freedom // by Daxisle //------------------------------// Hopeless Admittance Fighting the ungodly urge to unleash the contents of his stomach, Spike looked in horror at the large, red and white sphereical bone upon the library table. Ever since a bleary eyed Macintosh had loosed the bag it was carried in, Spike couldn't take his eyes off of it. Twilight had thrown up upon the skulls revelation, if not from the sight, than from the smell. Owlicious and Pee Wee had vacated the premisis, protesting the disturbing presence in the tranquility of their home. Twilight was gone, now. Off to call the guard and report what had been found. Macintosh was in the corner, sulking and completely detatched from everything. Spike broke eye contact with the skull to take in the bright crimson pony for a moment. Empty... Empty was the best way to describe how the stallion he'd come to know so well, looked. There was nothing else, no anger, no questioning, no expression of accusation or sentimentality. Nothing but a glazed over thousand yard stare. '-you hear m-' Spike didn't want to believe it, he didn't want to accept what he was seeing, but how could he? There was no other reports of missing foals, and none who'd ended up in the Everfree forest. The skull was too fresh to be that old, but he knew he was no thanatologist, so maybe the skull was older than that? Maybe it wasn't Scootaloo and somepony else who died in the woods a while ago? "Mac..." ... Spike removed himself from his chair and slowly, cautiously, approached his friend. "Macintosh?" Still no reply, Spike stood infront of the apple farmer, his recent growth putting him just a head short of the stallion. He wanted to ask if the stallion was alright, but such a knee-jerk question was redundant at best. Of course he wasn't alright, the guy just found the skull of a filly, who might as well have been his daughter, rotting out in the Everfree forest after he'd spent hours and hours searching for her... who would be alright after that? 'Maybe!' What? 'I said, maybe! There's no proof that skull belongs to Scootaloo. It's a fresh skull, fine, but there's no proof that's Scootaloo's. Mac said he'd found it pretty deep in the Everfree, right? Well, on the other side of the forest is the city of Trottingham, perhaps it came from a foal who lived there?' Spike wanted to believe that, he desperately wished he could see the possibility as viable. But the forest stretched sixty miles between Trottingham and Ponyville, Macintosh couldn't have been in more than fifteen miles at the absolute best... the numbers just weren't adding up to make Spike believe it. "How am Ah 'onna tell 'em?" Mac's voice broke softly, the volume barely above a whisper. The words, despite their softness, made Spike visibly cringe as the two mare's who cared most about Scootaloo came to mind... Annabelle wouldn't take this well and neither would Rainbow Dash, or Applebloom... Macintosh slowly turned to look at Spike, his now shine-less eyes looking at him, as if begging him to give the stallion some grandious explanation to the universe and why it had stolen from him something that gave him such happiness and feelings of pleasing joy. Alas, Spike could give him no such information. He had no clue how his friend was supposed to approach the situation, being blunt and straightforward wasn't okay, but they needed to know. Recieving no answer, Macintosh stood from his place and slowly skulked to the door. Spike looked back at the skull for a moment and then followed after, he may not have known what to say to comfort his friend, but he hoped his presence would do something to help. In spite of their slow speed, the silent walk was much to quick for Spike's liking. The dark of the evening only adding to the tense and sickly feeling in his stomach. Sweet Apple Acres was a mess, the typically pristine and manicured landscape lost beneath a mess of mismatched grass and uncollected farm equipment and tools. Half filled buckets were undisturbed last the drake was here, the wagon used to pull them sat out in the elements, the fruit within collecting time to ruin the flavor and appeal. Mac stopped outside the door, eyeing the barrier for a time as he did his best to collect his thoughts. Spike waited patiently, but after a few minutes, placed a claw onto his friend's shoulder in a show of support. Taking a few calming breaths, Macintosh readied himself for the emotional storm that he was about to unload and marched into the house. Upon entering, both he and Spike were confronted by Applebloom, the filly asking about any news with fragile hope. Spike did his best to maintain stoicism, as did Macintosh, but maybe that's what set Applebloom on edge even more. "Go n' get yer sister n' granny into the livin' room. We need ta talk." Applebloom called out as Macintosh trotted upstairs, asking him to explain, but he took no notice of her. "Spike?" She asked, the quivering in the filly's voice assaulting the stone armor the drake tried to encase his heart in. "Please, tell me what's goin' on!" Spike looked down at her, the tears in her eyes that usually would have made him bend over backwards and do handstands on a volcano brought him no compulsion now. It wasn't his place to say what he'd seen. "Sorry, but that's something Mac will have to say." The dragon said, unable to look at her anymore. The questions continued, the filly's inquiry escilating into frantic begging. Though, no matter how many tears fell, nor how high pitched and pleading her voice became, Spike wouldn't budge. 'It's not your place, I know it hurts...' Suddenly, he felt the filly's hooves on his chest, and she began screaming at him, yelling and hollaring about how she had to know, about how all of the uncertainty and not knowing was driving her insane. "TELL ME! WHADYA HEAR!? WHY WON' YA TELL ME, SPIKE? WHY!?" She screamed, her face a mask of tearful frustration. "TELL ME! TELL ME!" She began hitting his chest, purple arms met her hooves and restrained the foal as she kicked and struggled. Spike didn't know when, but Applejack had come and pulled the filly off of him, demanding to know what was going on. Her only reply was for Applebloom to burry her face in Applejack's barrel and sob uncontrolablly. "Spike?" The mare asked, doing her best to hold the miserable mess of crying and despair that was her sister. "Mac will be down soon to explain." Spike said. He conceptualized his stance by crossing his arms and closing his eyes. In short order, Macintosh returned, Annabelle behind him. Granny Smith, who was quietly watching from the kitchen, lead the way to the livingroom before taking a spot on the couch beside her grand daughters, placing her hoof on Applebloom's back in a show of comfort. The filly still clinging to Applejack, her sobs down to controlled breathing. The room was thick with tension and anticipation as Macintosh set Annabelle down, whispering a few things to her and kissing her forehead. The buttermilk earth mare had the same thousand yard stare Macintosh did, but her husband's actions seemed to bring her back a little bit. She didn't look happy, but it was better than the look of utter emptiness he saw when she first came down. Finally, Mac stood up and walked to the middle of the room. He pressed his lips and opened his mouth to speak but ended up clearing his throat. He closed his eyes, took a breath and began the explanation that made Spike feel as if he died a little on the inside. He'd been out in the Everfree all day, as he'd been for the past week. "N' Ah found somethin' today... Somethin' Ah think all o' ya should know about." Mac paused, trying his damnest to get the quivering of his lip under control. He took a few breaths and looked at his family. "Ah f- Ah found a skull, a... filly's skull." Spike's claws dug into his arms. Applebloom's crying redoubled itself, Applejack's jaw dropped and Granny closed her eyes in resignation. Annabelle's reaction was slower than the rest, as if the information was taking time to sink in. Despite Macintosh's elaboration that there was no proof that the skull he'd found was Scootaloo's, it was it was all to clear that everypony was accepting that it was. Macintosh's breathing became more and more frantic as he spoke, trying to convince everypony not to give up hope just yet. "Ah know that thing may- that things m-..." The stallion swallowed, his eyes shifting between the sobbing filly and his slowly trembling wife. Mac's breath began to quicken, the trembling the stallion had been fighting since he'd walked into the house overcoming his body as silent tears spilled down from his constricting eyes. The words he was trying to say being stolen by emotions he worked so hard to suppress. It hurt Spike, it hurt to see a pony he cared so deeply about to crack and fracture as he was. He placed a claw onto Macintosh's back, but that only served to push the pony's already labored breathing into full on hyperventilation. "Ah- Ah'm so sorreh!" He shouted, falling to his knees, and weeping. "Ah tried, Ah tried, Ah swear to Celestia Ah did, Ah looked as hard as Ah could! But Ah couldn't find her! Ah'm so sorreh!" That was it, that was all Spike could take of the suffering while maintaining his reserve. He knelt down and placed an arm around Macintosh neck, leaning his forehead on the side of the stallions own and joined the pony in his breakdown. "Ah tried, Ah swear Ah did... it's all mah fault..." Spike wanted to tell the pony that it wasn't, that he wasn't to blame for what happened, but no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't think of anything meaningful to say. Not that the pony would have been able to hear him anyways. Between the stallion and Applebloom, Applejack was also in tears now, clinging to the filly for all she was worth. Granny was quiet in her loss, but the tears on her cheek couldn't be hidden. Annabelle, slowly, pushed herself up onto her hooves and walked over to her husband. Her face a blank mask of sadness. Mac looked up at her for a split second before turning away in shame. It took Spike a moment for him to realize her position, but it was clear what she wanted. He sniffed and took a step back, giving her the space she needed. She lowered herself down, gently took Macintosh's head into her hooves and hugged the stallion's head to her chest. A hoof gingerly stroking his head as she cooed kind words of praise and redemption to him. Telling him that it wasn't his fault and that he'd tried everything in his power to find her. Suddenly, Spike found himself feeling out of place in the heart wrenching family moment. It was off putting to see the mare acting so calmly, everytime he'd seen her prior to, she was a disheveled mess of tears and sadness. That wasn't the Annabelle infront of him now, her tears had already been shead, and she'd accepted the matter for what it was. Macintosh had always been strong, he'd always been the rock, the point of certainty and emotional stability for her when she needed it. It was her turn to be strong for him, to hold him together through a trying time. Spike pressed his lips, whipped a few tears away and slowly made way for the door. "Spike?" The dragon stopped and looked back to find Annabelle smiling sadly at him. "Thank you, for everything." He didn't know what to say, there was no reason to thank the dragon as far as he knew, but he accepted the gratitude with a grateful smile before leaving the family to their privacy. He slowly walked off the farm, his next destination already in mind. There was still one pony who needed to know... Spike arived in the library to find Rainbow Dash bawling into Twilight's shoulder. He'd stopped by her cloud house earlier to find the mare not home and returned to Golden Oaks, the skull was gone now, but the putrid scent still lingered on. "That bitch... that bucking bitch!" Rainbow cried, condeming Social Justice for stealing the small filly away from her. Twilight didn't speak, she simply sat in silence and stroked Rainbow's back in a fruitless attempt to sooth her frustration and hopelessness. "I shouldn't have let her go... I should have stopped her, but I... I thought that..." Rainbow began, only to be interupted by the lavander unicorn. "Shhh, it's not your fault, Rainbow. Things just... happened." "NO THEY DON'T TWI!" The speedster cried, pushing herself off. "This happened because we didn't stop it! This happened because we sat by and let something we knew was wrong happen! I- I should have... If I had known she..." Rainbow's words devolved into an incoherent mess of sobbing mumbles. Twilight stepped forward and pulled the mare back into a silent hug. Her words struck Spike's heart, she was right, they did stand by as something wrong happened. It was clear to both of them that Scootaloo being taken into custady was a bad thing, that she was scared to death of being taken away. They all saw her cowering and gripping onto Macintosh, but they all thought it would end up with the foal answering some questions and then going right back to the farm. Never did any of them think things would turn out this way... Rainbow began condemning Social Justice, decrying the mare's very existence and wishing she'd never come to Ponyville. That's when Twilight made the fatal mistake of speaking about the validity of Justice's actions... Spike had silenced her before she said too much, but the damage was already done... "You- you think what she did was okay!?" Rainbow cried, pushing off the unicorn again. Seeing things were about to go very badly, Spike stepped forward and tried to speak for her before Twilight could place her hoof in her mouth once more. Now wasn't the time for lawful and objective analysis, Rainbow needed comforting, empathy, and understanding, not to be told she was wrong because the law had a few flaws. Again, though, the damage was already done, and Rainbow pushed the question, demanding Spike butt out of their current discussion. "Well, it's like Justice said, there were foals who were hurt and abused by their caretakers. Justice just wanted to make sure that Scootaloo was being treated well." "And that's supposed to make it okay that Scootaloo's dead!?" The speedster shouted. "Twilight, don't." Spike implored, but there was no stopping it now. The emotional and social graces of Twilight Sparkle were never really polished up as most ponies were. The unicorn had all the tact and emotional intelligence of a wet sock when it came to lawfulness vs rightness, a short coming Spike was ready to kick himself for never pointing out to her. Of course, it didn't make it okay that Scootaloo was dead, but all that Twilight was trying to get at was that those kinds of programs were in place for a reason. A notion Spike agreed with, but he wasn't about to let Rainbow know that. The sky blue pegasus was about to say something else, but Spike had had enough. It was a hard choice, being stuck between a mare who was known to be a hot head and another who's sense of logic was almost all consuming. He couldn't reach his mother, but he could reach Rainbow. "Dash, this is just how she deals with emotional situations." He said. "When it comes to emotional and lawful matters, Twilight retreats to any logic she can hold onto. You know how she was before she came to Ponyville, this is just her way of sorting herself out." Twilight quirked a brow at the dragon, and Rainbow furrowed her brows in irritated confusion. It wasn't technically a lie, but it would be met with questions later. He silence his mother with a raised claw and elaborated in a way that Rainbow could understand. Saying that the law was Twilight's primary moral compass and that she hadn't spent enough time socializing with others to develop a more in depth sense of empathy. "Ugh, you know what? Whatever, I need to go." The speedster growled before trotting out of the library and bursting into the night's sky. Spike, relieved that he'd defused the situation before things had gotten too bad, was accosted by Twilight, demanding for him to explain what he'd meant by his words. "Oh for Celestia's sake, Twilight. You were lecturing her on lawfulness when she's hurting!" Spike exclaimed. "You don't lecture ponies who are hurting, you give them sympathy!" "But she was wrong! We did what we were supposed-" "NO WE DIDN'T!" He yelled, making the unicorn take a step back in shock. "The law isn't perfect, Twilight! Don't you get that?! Scootaloo is gone because of the law! She's dead, a filly's dead because the law is bucking flawed! A foal died Twilight, don't you understand what kind of emotional pain that causes?" "OF COURSE I DO!" She shouted back. "I'm just saying the law exists for a reason!" Spike opened his mouth to shout back but instead took a breath to calm himself. This wasn't getting him anywhere, all it would do is strain thier relationship again, and that was honestly the last thing he wanted. "It does, Twilight. It does." He said calmly, "but right now, what Rainbow needs isn't the law. She needs a friend, a friend who'll listen to her, one who'll tell her that everything will be okay." He turned and made way for the door. "Laws don't offer ponies emotional comfort and love, friends do." He took one last look back at her. "You remember how you felt when she walked out on you during the wedding? When you needed her most and she abandoned you? That's how she feels right now. You didn't physically walk away, but you did turn your back on her emotionally. Think about that." Spike closed the door, leaving Twilight with a look of genuine shock.