Want to know something you wouldn’t expect from being magically transformed into a horse? The mountain of paperwork that both Sarah and myself had to fill out would certainly be one.
It had happened during our initial month’s worth of panicking, but the president had actually started to set up an entire organization to deal with this magic mumbo jumbo. It may have taken over a month for any work to finally be done, but they certainly made a difference for most of the situation, often pulling recluses out of hiding or similar problems. I think a few bikers got arrested as well when they started a magic style showdown and blew up a bar.
Unfortunately, this entire organization of new federally funded and specially trained agents came with a small toll. The sheer amount of paperwork that needed to be filled out for every last citizen. It didn’t help that we were up until 5 in the morning going through it all either.
“Coat color.... eye color...” Yawning, I looked up at Sarah and rubbed my face. “I want to say I can’t see the point of this, but that would be a bold faced lie.” Looking back at the papers, I shook my head and reached for another pen. “Wish it wasn’t so dang boring though. I’m about to fall asleep.”
Sarah sat on the other side of the table from me and was leaning onto one hoof, had a cup of coffee in the other, and was writing down yet another requested piece of information with the pen in her mouth. “Jush geh ih done....So tired...” Spitting the pen out, she brought the coffee mug to her lips. Sarah ended up blinking a bit and looking into the mug before turning to me. “Can I get a refill?”
That’s pretty much how we spent the next three days. After we got through the last of the filing and got back onto normal sleeping schedules, morning routines had become rather simple again. I’d wake up, shower as best I could thanks to all the fur, and then get to work fixing up one of my sister’s many home issues. On the other hand, Sarah usually slept in until around noon, and spent most of her time working on an art piece. It was pretty much like the transformation just hadn’t happened.
This time however, was a much different story when I woke up.
I was still a bit groggy, but even through the walls I could hear my sister talking. “What do you mean it got misfiled!? I only signed up for... Yes, I know that there have been-... but you can’t just do that without my consent! It’s a violation of m-... NO YOU SHUT UP! I only agreed to be a foster parent not a-... I know that I have a home large enough to qualify, but that doesn’t change anything! This is still a-...” During all of the yelling, I walked over into the main room, where I finally spotted Sarah glaring angrily at a wall while on the phone.
Walking up to her and putting a hoof on her shoulder, I unintentionally made her jump for a moment. “Sarah, everything alright?”
Taking a moment to catch her breath and put a hoof over the phone’s receiver, she glared at me for a moment. “Stop sneaking around like that, you scared the-” She jumped back into the call. “What?” Silence was all that filled the air. Whoever my sister was talking to now slowly drained away her anger and replaced it with... I wasn’t sure what emotion. Sarah kept staring ahead, before she nodded shakily for a moment. “O-Oh.... I see.... I’ll be waiting then.”
As she hung the phone back up, the peach mare slumped into the wall and stared in a daze. I walked over and sat next to her, a worried frown across my face. “Sarah?”
She gulped and glanced over at me. “That... was the DHS.”
Raising an eyebrow, I had to blink a bit at that. “The DHS? Why the heck would they be calling you? And what was with all of the yelling earlier? There isn’t something wrong with the paperwork is there?” Then again, if there was something wrong with that, those guys from the Magic Administration or whatever would have called instead.
Sarah pursed her lips a bit and snorted as she shook her head. “Well, according to the Director of Homeland Security, about seventy different people in the US just got labeled as Orphanages due to a filing mishap with not only their previous information but also the new paperwork as well, and now I have seven kids heading for my home by tomorrow morning.” With a sigh, She stood back up and headed for the kitchen. “I need a drink.”
The information took a few moments to set in for me. My sister’s home is getting turned into a freaking orphanage? I rushed after and found her rummaging through the fridge for a beer. Before she could crack open the can though, I took it out of her hoof and put it back in the fridge. “Before you get smashed, you mind elaborating?”
Glaring at me as she huffed and moved to the table. “Fine.” Sarah sat down and motioned for me to do the same. “I guess I’ll start at the beginning of the mess. You know how I’m...ya know?”
I grimaced a bit and nodded sadly. It’s been a while, but about 5 years ago, my sister was declared barren. Lost her “boyfriend” as well after he ditched her when he heard the news. “Yeah. Broke mom’s heart like nothing else.”
Sarah gave me a nod. “Well, it wasn’t long after that jerk Andrew and I broke up that I had decided to try and be a foster parent. I filled out the papers, had everything set up, and was ready to go, but unfortunately, unmarried single woman living on her own doesn’t exactly scream ‘suitable housing’ to the DHS.” She sighed and slumped over onto the table. “So I ended up in the sea of ‘potential’ housing and hadn’t been called in any way I wanted to be. Just reminders for updating information like when I had the studio built and the like.”
Blinking a bit, I took a moment to process that before my face contorted in confusion. “You signed up for foster care without letting anyone know?”
Sarah blushed a touch and smiled faintly. “Yeah... guess I’m getting what I wanted after all, huh?”
“I guess...” A scoff escaped my lips. “I’m just impressed you managed to keep that a secret from mom.” The two of us sat at the table for a moment before I sighed and rubbed my face. I really wanted to bring up a detail of this that was bugging me, but it seemed like this was not the proper time. “So what now, and how much are we going to have to do?”
Getting up and getting another beer, one I didn’t take away from her, Sarah cracked it open and sat on the floor. “We wait for them to show up.”
The two of us were silent as we either sat in thought, or drank the last beer she’d be allowed for quite a while. I wasn’t really sure how I should have felt. On one hand, I was furious. This was a complete load of bull to have suddenly dumped onto anyone, and it just did happen to my sister. On the other though, Sarah said it herself, she was getting what she wanted in a way.
The silence was broken when Sarah got up off of the floor. “I need some time to think.”
Looking over at the window, a scowl crawled across my face. Regardless of how I felt, this was a mess that definitely needed to be fixed as soon as possible.
Later that day, there was a knock at the door, as I was lounging in the living room from exhaustion. I would have stayed there too if allowed, but instead, I heard Sarah from shouting from her studio. “Tyler, could you get that?”
With a groan, I got up and headed for the front door. “Alright.”
When I got to the entrance and opened it up, I found myself looking at... nothing? “Uh...?”
I jumped a bit when someone spoke up. “Oh for Pete's sake... Down here.”
Glancing down, I could see a grumpy teal ball of horned adorable glaring at me from under a slicked grey mane with their violet eyes. “Are you the owner of the residence?” Okay not adorable; hateful. A tiny ball of hateful, horned fur.
Staring down at the rather rude unicorn, I raised an eyebrow. “...No, I’m her-”
“Where is she then?” The pompous little bugger glared as a clipboard floated from a bag around their shoulder. “This is supposed to be the residence of one Sarah Herg, so where is she?”
My eye twitched just slightly as I forced a smile. “She’s upstairs in her studio. As her brother I’m sure I could-”
“Nonsense, this is business that needs to be conducted with the individual in question.” The unicorn then walked under me to get inside. “A thorough inspection of the facility is also needed. Bruce!” I looked back to the door and spotted an exasperated stallion walking up to the front of the house. “Get in here!” Holy cow I think I saw a vein bulge out of his head.
The poor guy groaned and glared at the unicorn. “Cassandra, I could have you arrested right now, and I wouldn’t feel any pity. Stop barging into people’s homes, and act professional!”
I raised an eyebrow and looked at the larger of the two. “So... just who the hell are you?”
Bruce sighed and put a brown hoof to his head for a moment. “I’m Bruce Cardons, and the disrespectful one is Cassandra Hues. We’re both coming from the DHS to confirm residency and see to it that the establishment is suitable for housing.”
A glance into the kitchen spotted the small unicorn poking her nose into nearly every cabinet she could. “And if it’s not?”
“Then we have to supply the necessities required until the situation can be properly corrected.” Shaking his head, Bruce looked past me at his partner. “and Cassandra is only here with me to aid with writing thanks to my own lack of practice. She’s not even a real-”
“Finish that sentence and I will end you!” The small unicorn shouted.
We looked over at her for a moment before I stepped aside for Bruce. “Come on in. At least one of you is polite.”
Bruce smiled and walked in with a small nod. “Thank you. Now, where again is Ms. Herg?”
I looked over at the stairs and put a hoof to my mouth. “Sarah! We’ve got company.”
The sound of hooves above us headed off to the stairs. “Alright, give me a-” Sarah was cut off when the sound of tumbling, more than likely from her, crashed down the stairs. “Ow...” Yep, it was her.
I gave Bruce a small smile and sighed. “The stairs are fine, she just can’t climb them well.”
We headed for the couch in the main room as he straightened his suit. “You would be surprised how often I have heard and seen that with the people I’ve visited recently.” Bruce chuckled for a second, “So much so I would recommend installing a ramp next to them.”
Before I could reply, the small nasty unicorn came back into the room. “It’s about time.”
“Cassandra, please have manners.” The brown stallion just sighed and rubbed his face again.
Sarah finally joined us after that and took a seat next to me, rubbing her own head. “Sorry for the delay.” She winced a bit and pulled her hoof away before smiling at the two agents. “How may I help you?”
Rather than going over every last detail of that conversation, I’ll spare the boring parts of it all and just get to the important stuff. After going over the house, the DHS duo came to the conclusion that they’d need to send over some beds and the like to put in some of the rooms, as well as set up an account to give my sister her paychecks for food and necessities. Other then that, the house was up to their standards. All the two of us had to do is make sure that the place stayed clean until they sent over the children, er... foals.
Still getting used to that.
Through the entire process though, I couldn’t help but feel like something was wrong. I know there’s an amendment somewhere in the constitution that allows the government to seize property in times of desperation, so long as the owner was compensated, but this seemed like a bit of a stretch.
I guess I’ll just have to wait and see if what I’m feeling is right or not.