“Luna damn you kid… you’ll pay for what you’ve done!” Shouted the monster.
It stepped out of the dust cloud, its massive form dwarfing both Kevin and the foal. It was an abomination in Kevin’s eyes, an abomination of one of his favorite myths at least. But that took a back seat to the fact there was a real life minotaur in front of him. However, the arms on its sides were extremely short and skinny, like his body was trying to mimic a T-Rex. Conversely, its legs were extremely massive and thick, as were its horns.
Oh yes, Kevin could guess why it was mad. Connecting the horns together was bright pink ribbon that, thanks to the rhinestones, shined with a girlish splendor. Each horn had a massive bow on it that was also littered with rhinestones.
As if the kid had some sort of death wish, he snorted, trying in vain to hold back his laughter. The monster grew even more irritated at the laughter, a snarl forming on its mouth. “Oi, you got something to say brat? Do you know how impossible it is to get rid of these things with these short arms of mine! I’ll stomp you!”
As if to take out his anger, he swung a leg at the jungle gym near him. The pathetic and weak metal bent and practically exploded with the force. Several long, sharp poles stuck out at weird angles, the monster turned his gaze back at the two across the park.
“I’m gonna enjoy flattening you into paste.”
The monster roared and charged, once it was halfway it leaped up into the air, a good eight meters if Kevin had to guess. Kevin grabbed the tiny pony and yanked the both of them to the left, the monster’s heavy body slamming hooves first into the ground where they had just stood. Kevin grunted, “Just what in the hell made you do that to his horns?! You don’t mess with monsters like that you brat!”
The foal had a blank, not understanding, face as he replied, “His arms looked funny on such a scary body, duh. Why wouldn’t I?”
“Butt out weirdo! I’ll kill ya later!” screamed the monster.
As he was a simple human without any sort of special training, Kevin wasn’t able to drag both himself and the foal very far from the monster. So the monster was able to do a simple swinging side kick on Kevin, knocking him towards the broken jungle gym, where he slid to a slow and painful stop.
“What the hell am I doing?” Kevin thought as he looked back at the monster and foal. “I’m not a real hero, I don’t even have any sort of power or superhuman something. How could I think I could have saved the foal?”
The monster raised up a hoof, Kevin couldn’t see but he was certain the monster had a sinister grin on its face. He pushed himself up, grabbing his side in pain, he grabbed a piece of rubble with barely a trace of thought. He chucked it at the monster’s head, “Hey Princess! Get your girly butt over here and fight a real man! What? does a weakling like you need to pick on a brat?!”
“No seriously, what am I doing? I can’t kill this thing. I’m not really Saitama, hell, I don’t even have his superhuman abilities! I’m so fucking dead!”
The monster grinned and brought his leg back down, “Oh? So you wanna die first then? Alright.”
Kevin was on shaky legs, just the one hit from that monster hurt like hell. He looked at the terrified face of the foal and gulped, “But… I can’t just let a child die like this, no matter the species. Someone has to protect the weak.” He looked at the monster walking towards him with renewed determination, then looked around himself for any way to beat this thing. His eyes widened a fraction when he remembered what was behind him.
“I might not be a superhero, but I’ll be damned if I just drop dead now!”
“Come on, hurry up fruit cup! I bet your charge is as weak as your arms!” Kevin taunted.
That seemed to work, the monster growled and slammed a hoof down to send him flying forward in blind rage. “I have the greatest leg strength in the world! I forgo working my arms in favor of pure leg work! The result is as you see! My charge can break mountains!” The monster was almost at Kevin now. “My charge can destroy-!”
Kevin barely dove to the side, wincing when his hurt side moved, and the monster was interrupted mid speech as a broken piece of the jungle gym’s pipe pierced its throat. It was a one in a million chance. The momentum of the monster carried it further down the pipe until the body crashed into it. The already broken playground equipment came crashing down on top of the monster.
Kevin slowly stood back up while the foal looked at the destroyed jungle gym and the corpse of the monster with wide eyes.
“See ya brat. Don’t screw with monsters now.” Kevin said dramatically, quickly turning around and walking out the side exit of the park.
“I think I see now. I can’t just be given these awesome powers out of the blue, out of the whim of some guy I never met.” Kevin looked forward, as if he was seeing the future, with narrow brown eyes that seemed to glow with a strange light for a brief few moments. “I need to earn them! Put in real effort, so that when I reach that higher level I’m all the better as a person for it. Saitama put in effort to change, so will I!”
Kevin slammed a fist into his palm, “It’s time to train.”
It was a hot day in the areas of Fillydelphia that weren’t under reconstruction, it was barely twenty four hours since the beetle attack, the people of this land work quick. Despite that, many of its citizens were roaming around, doing various chores and errands. Pegasi and griffons could be seen flying around in the sky doing their own thing. In the street Kevin walked down he could see an earth pony mare in a suit standing under a covered stand. She had stacks of blue paper sitting on her stall and was passing them out to passersby.
Kevin held up the blue piece of paper he was given, the words “Equestria’s Hero Association” written in bold across its top. He continued to read down the sheet, absorbing the information. He smiled when he got further down, the association was looking for new potential heros to take the test in the large domed nearby hero facility here in Fillydelphia.
Kevin gripped his hand into a fist, not caring that the paper was crushed into a ball. He grinned as he walked down the street, he was finally going to become a hero now. The past three years of training have lead to this moment and he would not miss it. With the donations the association gets Kevin will finally have a way to make better money now that he felt he was ready.
“This has turned into a lucky day now! Only one more week until I’m a real hero!” He said as he walked down the street to the supermarket near his apartment. It was the only place that had lower prices on groceries. So lost in his happy thoughts, he didn’t hear or see the wall brick wall of a store not too far in front of him explode onto the street.
“Oh hooo!!! Lucky lucky!” An extremely large unicorn stepped out of the store. “My complete passion for today’s tech has lead me to become what I am now!”
“Super Television Pony!” At a better glance one could see the reason for his large stature, he was using two large and boxy televisions under each hoof to make him see larger. He was blood red, with blue zig zag stripes across his body. He also had a huge and wildly spiky black mane. A black visor was across his eyes, its glow suggested it was connected to a computer and showed different kinds of readings. He also had a large metal box like thing on his back.
Screams rang out through the streets as every smart citizen ran for their lives away from the newest lunatic. Super Television Pony cackled as metallic tentacles of some kind shot out of the metal backpack he had on. They stabbed themselves into the televisions in the store and flung them at the fleeing citizens.
“Ahhahahahahaaaa! Flee you vermin! Soon, all of Fillydelphia will belong to me! Ahhahahaha… huh?” He stopped his mad laughing when he saw a strange creature standing on the same sidewalk as him, simply looking at Super Television Pony as if he just noticed him.
The lunatic turned to face Kevin properly, his television stilts making loud thumps. “What do we have here?”
Kevin just looked at Super Television Pony blankly.
“You look like a shitty original character in some weird fanfiction or fan art.” Kevin said.
Super Television Pony snarled at him, screaming profanities as one of the tentacles threw a television at Kevin’s face. The television slammed perfectly into his face, exploding into a shower of metal and glass. Circuits and wires flew in all directions as Super Television Pony panted, all the rage induced screaming had taken his breath away.
“You kiss your mother with that mouth?”
Super Television Pony’s eyes widened under his black visor, the glasses dropping down his snout a bit in shock. The newcomer simply stood there with a bored look on his face, not a scratch on him.
“Is throwing stuff all you do?” He sighed. “Ah, well. I suppose it doesn’t matter really,” Kevin said. “I’m not looking for a stimulating conversation right now.”
“What does that mea-?” Super Television Pony didn’t get to finish, Kevin was already above him. A quick and light chop to the head knocked the criminal out cold as he slammed face first into the ground. The televisions tilts he had on shattered from the pressure.
Kevin landed lightly on his feet.
“Guess that settles that. I’ll let the police take it from here.” Kevin continued to walk down the street. “Gotta hurry before they close.”
“How go the preparations of the hero tests in Fillydelphia?” Princess Luna asked as she faced the monitors of the dark room. The rustling of a page followed her statement.
“All is going as planned, the only hiccup was a stubbed hoof. The pony was quickly taken to the hospital.” Fine Thrust said.
Luna grunted, “A stubbed hoof? Next you’ll tell me a paper cut requires stitches.” She sighed, “Nevertheless, be on the lookout during these exams next week. I suspect the one who took out Lord Three Horns will be there.” Another rustle.
“Are you certain Princess?” Fine asked. He did not mean to question her judgement, he just wanted to make sure such a powerful individual would actually show up.
“I am. Call it a gut feeling if you will. I have learnt to trust in those, they don’t always lead you wrong.” Another rustle of paper filled the air.
“Very well, I’ll tell the staff to be watchful of any potential candidates.” Fine Thrust bowed his head and made to leave as another rustle made itself known. He was almost at the door when he heard the Princess curse.
“Horseapples!” Luna yelled, quickly shooting out of her chair.
Fine Thrust quickly shot around, “What is it Princess?! Are we under attack again?!”
She didn’t seem to hear him. “Curse you Mane-iac! The Power Ponies will prevail over your accursed trap! Mark my words!” Luna yelled in the Royal Canterlot Voice, a nearby wall cracking. A Power Pony comic book held in her blue magical grasp.
“I’ll uh, I’ll just go then…” Fine Thrust mumbled as he slowly backed out the room, still wincing in pain from the sudden use of the Royal Canterlot Voice.