It started out as any normal day for me, get out of bed, make breakfast then go to work, finally come home and then sit and watch mlp. As I went to sleep after having a shower I felt a weird sensation throughout my body I opened my eyes and looked around the room of my apartment, I saw nothing out of the ordinary expect on my second inspection I realized that my window was open. I got out of my bed and approached the window, as I looked out the window I looked into the sky I saw the full moon hanging in the sky, I inspected the moon and for a split second I could have sworn I saw the mare in the moon. I shook my head in dis-belief after realizing that the cold night wind must have sent a shiver down my spine I decided to grab myself a blanket from my linen cupboard, after grabbing the blanket I returned to bed. I never closed the window when I was going to sleep knowing that the ray’s of Luna’s moon were seeping into my room, helped me go to sleep.
As I began to sleep I could swear I could hear maniacal laughing in the distance and then talking, the people who were talking sounded familiar, my thoughts were confirmed when the voices sounded more clear.
“Oh and look who’s here all 6 little elements.” Said a voice that sounded a lot like a certain draconequus that most bronies would recognize immediately, the self proclaimed god of chaos and disharmony, what really caught my attention is that there were more voices.
“Yeah of course we’re here ya knucklehead.”
“Dash is right, your spell to keep us from working together Discord, failed!” Those voices caught me off guard the voices of Rainbow Dash and Twilight Sparkle, my mind then jumped to the assumption that I was dreaming, as soon as I thought that I realized there were no pictures to go with the audio, what the draconequus said next sent chills down my body as for once he sounded serious.
“Well it doesn’t matter anyway even if you do stop me you won’t be able to stop the creature I have summoned, a beast of pure evil and chaos something that not even your little gems there could ever hope of stopping.” At this Discord proceeded to do what any second rate villain would do after announcing their plans, cackle like a madman. Thankfully his cackling was cut short as Twilight chimed her own thoughts.
“C’mon girls, it’s time Discord went back to being a lawn ornament in the Canterlot Gardens.”
At this Discord’s screams of defeat could be heard as his final scream could be heard I opened my eyes at the shock of hearing those screams, when I opened my eyes I bolted upright looked around and could have sworn I was sitting in the middle of what looked like Ponyville, I then looked behind me and saw 6 figures approaching me as they came into view I couldn’t believe what I was seeing, the Mane six stood a few meters away from me.
“Alright girls this looks like the thing that Discord was talking about, let’s show Discord he was wrong in thinking that whatever he summoned we wouldn’t stop.” As Twilight said this the others began to approach, fortunately for me I never got to find what would happen next as my head collided with the grassy ground and darkness filled my vision, before I completely lost myself to unconsciousness I heard the voice of Fluttershy.
“Girls stop! This creature looks hurt, besides what if this is a trick that Discord thought of, and we then turn an innocent creature to stone.” As Fluttershy said the last part of her speech I was lost to the sweet sleep that called itself unconsciousness.
I woke up to the voice of someone I haven’t heard in years a voice that I spent years of therapy trying to remove from my mind, the voice of my alter ego his name is Orion, funny seeing as how my name is Ryan.
“Well well well.”
“Oh crap.” I respond to the voice in my head, man how I hate MPD (Multiple Personality Disorder for those of you that don’t know.) having Orion’s voice back was going to be a pain in the ass.
“Well sorry I’ll try not to be that much of a pain in the ass,” After he said this I froze up he then unfortunately continued his ramblings. “You do remember that I can read most of your thoughts such as you calling me a pain in the ass.”
“It slipped my mind okay, what the heck are you doing here anyway? Dr Maywhether’s therapy was the only one that worked!”
“Yeah well I was put to sleep, the good doctor’s training only put me to rest. You should get a refund seeing as how you payed him to get rid of me.”
I then realized that Orion had a point, damn him and his logic to hell.
“Hell eh? Sounds like a nice place for a vacation.”
“Shut up will you, please just for five minutes, and besides the doc’s therapy was working so far, so what has woken you up eh?”
At that Orion did something I never remember him doing before in the black void which I’m guessing was my mindscape, (good old Gravity Falls memories) a copy of me appeared expect one thing was different about this mirror copy, the right eye was spitting out a red fire like the eye was cursed. As I approached the clone of me it jolted to life and from the clone’s mouth came Orion’s voice.
“Ah it’s good to have my own body, well technically it’s a copy of your body but anyway.”
At this Orion started to stretch his clone body like it had just awoken from a year long slumber. As Orion stopped stretching and making every joint that was on the clone’s body crack a voice spoke from all around me and Orion.
“Ryan, do you know who I am?”
At this I stood there thinking to myself who could this voice be, luckily my answer came ”from Orion’s mouth.
“Are you God?”
“Yes I am, how did you know Orion, If I may ask?” At this I stood completely still, my mind was spinning in confusion, upon managing to stabilize my mind Orion spoke once again.
“Easy you got a really booming voice, also my demonic side is starting to itch like crazy.”
“Hmm anyway I am here to tell you Ryan and Orion, that you are in Equestria and that this is not a dream,” So I was in Equestria I wasn’t dreaming so many thoughts were starting to race through my mind my mind calmed itself as God spoke once more. “Discord summoning you two was no mere coincidence, something is happening in the shadows, Ryan I am tasking you with finding out what is happening.”
As soon as God finished I acted as any Christian brony would react and leapt into the air and started celebrating, as soon as my mind thought of celebrating a shower of confetti rained down on me from the darkness that made up my mindscape, once I realized that I made the confetti rain down on me God spoke once more.
“Ryan there are conditions that you must abide by, if you wish to stay in Equestria,” As soon as he said this I stopped celebrating and put on my most serious expression. “The conditions for you to stay in Equestria are as follows, Number 1: you must not tell the inhabitants of the future that is to come such as Twilight Sparkle becoming an Alicorn.”
“Got it no spoilers.”
“Good also Orion, you will not be able to tell spoilers either, I am altering your mind so that you do not jeopardize Ryan’s mission,” With that said a clicking sound was heard I looked to Orion and noticed that he had a look of sadness on his face guessing that whatever God did worked out in the end. “Ryan, the second condition is that you not convert the ponies of Equestria into Christians, as if you do you will disrupt their way of life and also reveal my presence.”
“Got no going around to ponies houses being a witness of Jehovah, anything else sir?”
“No there is no other conditions that you need to abide by, but do try to control both yourself and Orion.”
With that the voice of God left, as I looked around Orion spoke up.
“Okay then that was fun! Hmm seems like your waking up well have fun and don’t worry I’ll be here in your mind.” Orion was right I did get the sudden urge to awaken from my supposed slumber yay time to go say hi to all my soon to be friends.
“Ughhh my head.” Ah good old famous first words, Neil Armstrong had ‘One Small Step For Man, One Giant Leap For Mankind’ and what does the first human in Equestria say, ‘Ughhh my head’ man I could already tell I was going to go down in history.
I opened my eyes to look at my surroundings, finding myself in what looked like a hospital room, as I looked around the room I noticed I wasn’t alone next to my bed was an earth pony, she turned to look at me, if I was to guess she giving me a once over to see whether I was alright or not.
“How do you feel sir?” This caught me off guard I didn’t expect her to say that honestly, part of my mind was freaking out that a pony was talking to me.
“Um I feel fine except for a bit of a headache Miss?” I Let the last part of my sentence hang in the air luckily she picked up on what I was trying to say.
“Of course where are my manners, I am Nurse Red-Heart and you would be?”
“My name is Ryan, Miss Red-Heart pleasure to make your acquaintance.” At this I held my hand out offering to shake her hoof.
“Well pleasure to meet you Ryan,” At this she placed her right fore-hoof in my hand picking up on the gesture, good at least ponies knew what a handshake was or as they would say hoof-shake. “Well Ryan, I need you to take this two pills and drink this water for me and that should help with your headache.”
After saying this Nurse Red-Heart placed two pills in my open hand, and did as I was instructed and as soon as the pills hit my digestive tract my head felt a million times better.
“Wow thanks Miss Red-Heart, I feel a million times better.” After saying this I beamed a smile that would make Pinkie Pie jealous.
“Well if you don’t mind, you have some visitors Ryan.” This piqued my interest immediately.
“Sure tell them they can come in Miss.”
The next few seconds were a complete and utter blur, as soon as Nurse Red-Heart opened the door, a pink blur ran through the door and jumped up on my hospital bed and the next thing I knew Pinkie Pie was sitting mere centimeters from my face, then my ear drums were filled with what sounded like a fly’s buzzing, as soon as the buzzing came it stopped, my mind then realized that the buzzing was actually Pinkie asking me a bunch of questions but super quickly.
Thankfully for my ribcage Pinkie was surrounded in a lavender glow and lifted off of me and my hospital bed. I looked to the door and saw Twilight’s horn glowing lavender, I have to remember to thank her later for that.
“Pinkie please try not to hurt him, sorry about that Mr?” She left that last part hanging in the air luckily I performed the same trick on Miss Red-Heart so I easily picked up on what she was trying to say.
“Oh it’s fine, by the way my name is Ryan and you’re?” Of course I already knew who this was I just needed too keep up the image of me knowing nothing.
“Well Ryan, my name is Twilight Sparkle, my enthusiastic friend there is Pinkie Pie,” At this Pinkie started waving as soon as I looked towards her, Twilight then gestured to the rest of my visitor’s. “From left to right is Rarity,”
“Pleasure to meet you darling.” Rarity then proceeded to give a small curtsey.
“Next to her is Applejack.” Twilight chimed in.
“Well howdy there pleasure to meet you.” After her greeting she tipped her hat to me.
“Next is Rainbow Dash.” Twilight then said gesturing to the cyan Pegasus.
“Hi name’s Rainbow Danger Dash nice to meet ya bud.” At this she struck an impressive pose.
“Then there is Fluttershy.” At this she gestured to the yellow Pegasus hiding behind her.
“Hi there mister.” At this I almost couldn’t help myself from letting out an aww from the adorable Pegasus.
“And last but not least is my faithful assistant Spike.” She then gestured to said baby dragon as he rode on her back.
“Wait is he a baby dragon?” I asked just to make sure.
“Yep he’s a baby dragon hatched him from an egg myself.” Well that definitely got my jaw to hit the ground in surprise.
This led to quite a few chuckles from the ponies in the room, as soon as the chuckles died down, a look of realization dawned on Twilight’s face as she quickly pointed to the pink pony standing at the end of my bed.
“Sorry but I also forgot to mention Pinkie Pie, just sort of slipped my mind as you two did just meet a few seconds ago.” At this she let out a bit of an awkward chuckle as she realized she forgot to introduce me to the pink pony.
“Ah no problem Miss Sparkle,” At this I held my hand to Pinkie and proceeded with my thoughts but directed the to Pinkie. “A pleasure to meet you again Miss Pie.” The last thing I expected was for her to shake my so quickly that it felt like it was going to be dislocated.
“Well pleasure to meet you Mr Ryan, sorry about jumping on you earlier but I was just sooooo excited to meet somepony new, although technically you’re not a pony but anyway great to meet you!” At this she let go of my arm, luckily my arm was still attached but also she was speaking to me at a rate that I could understand what she had said. For a split second silence filled the hospital room, then a belch was heard from Spike as he coughed up a scroll, and presented it to Twilight.
Twilight took it in her magical aura and gave it once over, as she was reading it I wondered to myself what could be on that scroll luckily I was answered as Twilight spoke out what she had read. “Okay then girls could you and Spike, head back to the library, Princess Celestia, is on her way to retrieve Discord but also to meet our friend here.”
At this the other ponies all gave signs of agreement, they then proceeded to exit the room and by my guess head to Twilight’s library, she then looked at me like she expected me to say something luckily for her I complied and spoke what came to my mind.
“So I get to meet royalty on my first day here, I feel so excited,” As I said this Nurse Red-Heart stuck her head into the room and asked if we wanted anything thankfully my mind thought up a response as quickly as it came. “Miss Red-Heart can we please get some tea, two glasses of tea to be precise.” As I said this she nodded and then proceeded to fill my request I then realized when she was gone how much of an idiot I was. “Dammit I should have asked for three cups of tea, 1 for me, 1 for you Twilight and 1 for Princess Celestia.”
“Oh thank you for considering me but I won’t be sticking around when Princess Celestia arrives,” When she said this I gave her a look of confusion luckily she understood what the look on my face meant. “Well Princess Celestia, will probably want to talk to you in private so there really isn’t a point for me to stay for too long, but don’t worry I’ll just be at the library with the others.”
At this Nurse Red-Heart re-entered with the cups of tea, she then proceeded to place them on the table next to my bed and she left the room, after few seconds after she left Twilight and I looked to the door and saw Princess Celestia enter.
“So you are the great evil that Discord summoned to Equestria.” At this she put on her smile of peace and motherly kindness, luckily I managed to tell she was merely joking around so I played along.
“Yep you caught me,” I then proceeded to hold out my hands towards her, “I’ve been caught fair and square.”
This action managed to get two results. The first was confused glances from Twilight, that were shared between me and her mentor. The second was a slight chuckle from Celestia.
“Well I best leave him in your capable hooves Princess Celestia, when you’re done interrogating him please bring him over too the library so you can retrieve the Elements from us.” With an approving nod from Celestia, Twilight turned to the door and proceeded to exit.
“Well then, if I could ask you a few questions Mr?”
“Ah well Princess Celestia, my name is Ryan, also go right ahead with your questions, but I have a question for you first.”
“Hmm and what would that question be Ryan?”
“Would you like a cup of tea?” At this I gestured to the two cups of tea on my bedside table.
“Well of course Ryan, also thank you for the offer.” At this one of the tea cups floated in a yellow aura, which I guessed to be her magical aura she then took a sip from the tea cup letting out a sigh of gratitude.
“Now sorry to interrupt your tea Princess, but what would those questions be you were going to ask me?”
“Ah yes sorry about that sort of a fan of a good cup of tea. Now those questions and take as long as you need to answer no rush,” At this I gave a nod of understanding. “Good now Question number 1: what are you?”
“Well Princess,”
“Please call me Celestia.”
“Um okay then Celestia,” At this she gave an approving nod and with one of her fore-hooves gestured for me to continue. “Well I am a human being, or just Human for short.”
“Hmm okay then, second question would you consider yourself a threat to Equestria, and forgive me if I sound a tad on edge, but the being that summoned you here Discord, said that you would be the greatest threat Equestria has ever known.”
“Well you’re forgiven, I can understand why you would be concerned as you are the ruler of these ponies you just want them to be safe and protected. As for whether or not I am a threat to Equestria that has yet to be seen.”
“What would you mean by that?”
“Oh sorry if that sounds a tad bit malevolent, I mean need to learn what the rules of Equestrian society are, so I can know what could be considered bad, but as an overall villain looking to spill blood or take over Equestria, I would never dream of it.”
“Hmm good good I will have to remember that, anyway third question where do you come from?”
“I come from a planet called Earth, it’s inhabited by many different creatures, and not to stoke my own ego but we Humans consider ourselves at the top of the food chain. Also Celestia one of the reasons I would never hurt your subjects is because and don’t judge me but they are very adorable.”
At this Celestia let out a small chuckle and gave me a small motherly smile. “Well Ryan good to know you wouldn’t hurt my little ponies, also don’t worry I won’t tell anypony what you just said to me, now how about we go to Twilight’s library and get you settled in. Also thank you for the tea.”
As she turned towards the door I got out of bed to thankfully find that my clothes were still on my body, also it was a long day at work on earth I couldn’t be damned to change into my Pajamas, and so we headed out of the hospital towards Twilight’s library.
Celestia and I eventually made it to Golden Oaks Library, the trip here from Ponyville hospital was fun to say the least. On the journey I managed to catch quite the number of od looks from the residents of Ponyville, but when they saw I was with Celestia they calmed down quite quickly. When we entered the library the Mane Six were standing in the center of the ground level of the library, all of them were wearing their respective elements, when Celestia and I entered the library, the ponies bowed when they realized their Princess had arrived, unfortunately I couldn’t help myself with what I did next.
“Now now girls no need to be bowing to me, I’m not royalty you all know.” This little comment got a few looks of confusion from the ponies, but did surprisingly manage to get a chuckle from Celestia.
“Well Twilight, good to see you and your friends are here with the Elements as well good if you all would be so kind to place them in this box if you would.” At this she summoned an ornate box, that should be called anything but a simple box. When the box appeared Twilight looked to her friends and nodded for them to place their Elements in the box, after this the box teleported away, I guessed that it had teleported away to the place they were usually kept in Canterlot.
“Hey Princess Celestia, should we really be taking off our Elements, we don’t even know if Ryan here, is friendly or not?”
Celestia looked at Dash for a few seconds, I could have sworn I could see Dash sweating her flank off under Celestia’s gaze. The next thing Celestia did took everyone in the room by surprise. “You are correct Rainbow Dash,” At this silence filled the library, it was so quiet you could here a pin drop from a mile away. “You have every right to be cautious around Ryan, but I have talked to Ryan myself and he has admitted that he is not going to be a threat to anypony. Twilight if you could please do a favor for me.”
“Of course Princess Celestia, what is it you want?”
“I wish for you to do a couple of things for me, the first is I need you to teach Ryan here our laws and rules of everyday pony society.”
“Of course Princess Celestia.”
“The second thing I need you to do is to provide somewhere for Ryan to stay.”
“Um just to clarify Princess Celestia, you want him to stay here with me and Spike?”
“Yes if that isn’t too much to ask of you?”
“Of course not Princess Celestia.”
At this my breath caught in my mouth and the next thing I knew I hit the ground. Great I passed out, so much for me thinking I could keep my inner brony under control. Luckily I wasn’t out for very long.
“Ryan are you okay?!” That sounded a lot like a certain purple unicorn.
“Urgh what happened, oh hey Twilight.”
“Hey Ryan,” She gave a slight chuckle probably to how calm I was being, before she could continue I did what any brony in my position would do I bopped the end of Twilight’s muzzle with my right index finger saying ‘boop’ when I did it. “Did you just poke my muzzle?” She said in shock and confusion mostly the latter
“Yes I had my opportunity and I took it.”
At this she gave me a deadpan look that could turn Discord to stone, luckily she continued with her original thought removing the deadpan gaze from her face. “As I was saying,” Meanwhile Dash could be heard cackling like a mad man. “Dash, please stop laughing this is serious,” That managed to get Dash to quiet down although if you listened close enough you could hear Dash stifling her giggles. “Sorry about that but are you okay Ryan, you sort of just fainted when Princess Celestia said you would be staying with me and Spike.”
“Yes I am dreadfully sorry,” Celestia chimed in. “I should have told you what I was planning before if I knew you were going to act like that.”
“Oh no it’s fine Celestia, also thank you Twilight I’d love to stay here with you and Spike.”
“Wait you do want to stay here with me and Spike? Then why did you faint like it was a bad thing?” Twilight gave me a questioning look waiting for an answer.
“Well where I come from on Earth Twilight, no one would do that sort of thing, especially for me, it came as a shock to me that’s all, so thanks Twilight.” At this I beamed a smile at her, one that probably beamed more that dear Celestia’s sun.
“Well when you put it like that Spike and I will be glad to have you here, won’t we Spike?” At this Spike came over and extended his claw to me.
“Gonna be great to have you here Ryan.” At this I let go of shaking his claw, finding it surprising how soft his scales were.
“Hmm good well I will leave Ryan, in your capable hooves Twilight, take care of him okay.”
“Sure thing Princess Celestia.” And with that said Celestia was gone in a flash of yellow light, straight to Canterlot.