//------------------------------// // 6- Lunch Hour // Story: MegaMane // by Flutters Is Shy //------------------------------// I tore into my salad with healthy abandon, greedily scarfing down the plant matter A and DM had packed for my lunch. Model P still had yet to wake up, but I couldn't risk leaving him at home. Instead of leaving him in the window sill like I had this morning, he -or she, I honestly couldn't remember its personality all that well- now rested in the bottom of my sack, watched over by DM and A as I made my rounds. My 'employers' -they gave me money, they made me work, but they had never actually hired me- saw my previous work from the days before and apparently decided to 'gift' me a larger workload. In a society that didn't have phones, the mail service was more than booming. It was a freaking monster in and of itself. Carriages arrived daily, touting trailers stuffed to the brim with messages and packages. All in all, it was frankly surprising that the mail service hired as few individuals as it did. I only really saw twenty different people, anyway. Including 'Warden'. Anyway, my new workload took me considerably longer than my previous attempts had. I was left far longer running around than before, but at least I had the forethought to categorize my deliveries into sections dependent on where they tugged on me when I picked them up. That way I wasn't running back and forth willy nilly, backtracking for every single package like an idiot. Still, the extra work took its toll, gradually. The wheelchair chafed me around my midsection, and I was fairly certain pants were now the work of the devil. They rode up, wedging in places best not mentioned in civilized company. To boot, they collected sweat like no ones business, clinging to me in a most uncomfortable way. I was on the verge of swearing them off like so many around me obviously had, and just committing myself to the life of a shameless nudist. When in Rome, right? Horse Rome, but anyway. I digress. "So, heard you've been givin' the Warden a bit of a stir, eh?" a voice claimed, bringing me out of my reverie. It's not like I had sat down alone, but in my bout of introspective thinking I had become quite mobbed by my coworkers. The silent call to lunch had not gone unanswered, as more and more ponies had decided to take a break to sit down at the provided tables and chow down on whatever food they had brought with them. More than a few had decided to encircle me, filling my space with chatter and the scent of other meals. The mare that sat to my left, a short earth pony with a calico coat of black and blue hilariously had a name tag on her chest that read 'Black Anne Blue'. Bet she loved her parents for that. She was the one who had spoken to me, so I quickly responded once I had mulled her words over. "I figured it was time to stop feeling sorry for myself," I started, carefully swallowing the food in my mouth so I didn't inadvertently spray it across the faces of those I was trying to talk to, "Stop doing the bare minimum. If I let my disabilities define who I am," at this I paused, slightly unable to process the words passing my lips. Wasn't that what I had been doing in my day to day life? Feeling sorry for myself just because I lost a leg... and other things... I had made it out of that with more than the others had, and afterwards had done relatively little with my life. Nothing more than feeling sorry for myself, I'll admit. Had a simple change of venue really been all I needed to finally get my ass in gear? Nah, I'm sure it was unrelated. "...If I don't live life to the fullest, won't it simply pass me by?" I finally ended, masking my moments hesitation with a gulp of water. "Well said!" trumpeted a griffin with the name-tag of 'Thrash' as he slung what looked like a leg of cooked lamb in front of my face. The others didn't so much as seem to think this was an affront as simply rude, as evidenced by Black Anne sinking her hoof deep into Thrashes side. He let out an indignant squawk, dropping his food as he tried to form a protest. "Don't wave your stinky food in my face, you feathered windbag," Black Anne stated dismissively with a smile on her face. A pegasus with the name-tag of 'Balaan' scooped up the leg and tossed it back over to Thrash with nary a protest. He then wiped his wing of the grease on Thrashes hindquarters. "Agh! Dude, do you know how hard that is to get out?" he yelped as he tried to rub it clean with a napkin. "Yes," Balaan replied, almost emotionlessly. "That is why I wiped it off on you. Much easier to clean from fur, than feathers." "Trust you to think of it logically," Thrash griped, seemingly satisfied with how clean he managed to get his butt. "It's Balaan, all he does is think logically!" Black Anne joked, prompting the trio to devolve into a gaggle of giggles. Even Balaan seemed to find it funny. "Hey, I've been meaning to ask," Thrash started, gulping down a strip of flesh as he used his beak to tear it from the bone. "How did you lose your leg?" Black Anne landed another solid strike to Thrashes side, causing him to shoot a glare at her. "Gosh, have some friggin tact, huh? What birdbrain here is trying to get across between the massive amounts of understanding and compassionate thinking is that for all intents an' purposes we basically know next to nothin' about you. So spill! A whole freaking month you're pullin' paper right alongside us, and the most we actually know about you is that you used to live in Trottingham, and that you weren't in 'our' line of work before," she stated with a pointed look. "So c'mon, spill! What else is interesting about a pony with the hilariously contradictory name of 'Rock Light'?" "Uhh..." I stuttered, masking my pause with a prolonged chew before I swallowed. "Nothing much to tell," I stated, trying to figure out what I could tell them. So they knew nothing about me. That was good. I could very well tell them basically anything and it had relatively little chance to return to bite me in the ass. That being said, I didn't want to have to think up some entirely new fictitious life I would continuously remember despite my having no actual recollection of it. Best to supplement my lie with as much truth as I could shove into it, then. "I..." I started, trying to think on how best I could translate this, "I used to be in the guard." "No shit?" Thrash asked, earning another hoof to his side. "Language, you cretin," Black Anne said in a well meant tone. "No reason to embarrass yourself further than you already have..." "You have the shoulders of a guard," Balaan stated in what might have been an amused tone. "I can not admit to claiming you have the legs of one, however." Black Anne gave him a disapproving glance. "What, I say a single word and you hit me, and then Balaan says all that and gets away with a dirty look?" Thrash said in an offended tone, sucking the marrow from the center of the bone. "Balaan means well, he just doesn't know any better," Black Anne retorted, giving Thrash a dirty look of his own at his loud slurping. "I mean well too..." he argued, letting out a low huff. They fell silent once more, awkwardly prompting me to continue. "Well... I uh...I was in the guard. For a few years before... this," I gave my stump a shake, drawing their gazes as a consequence. "Believe me when I say that I made it out... better than anypony else that was there. So I would appreciate if you wouldn't ask any further on this particular subject, if you don't mind." It was a touchy subject, even as watered down as I had made it. They seemed to be able to catch on to that at least. It wasn't that I didn't like them, having more friends to help take some stress off would be nice. But they were delving into some very... personal territory. I didn't like talking about that, not with anyone. The sooner we could move past that particular conversational point would make me all that much more happy. "Suffice to say, I was... let go. An honorable discharge, mainly due to my condition. After that, I moved to Ponyville, and now I work here. As to why I moved here, apparently it was over a girl." I got a couple of 'oohs' and a blank stare from Balaan, as well as a sharp shoulder from Thrash along with a knowing wink. "Apparently? How can you 'apparently' move for a girl? Are you just not sure?" Anne stated with a knowing smirk, swishing her tail back and forth behind her. "Ehm. Short answer, Discord," I responded, sipping at a box of juice I had bought at the workplaces personal concessions stand. They had all sorts of little goodies. I got a round of hisses from my answer. Again I was struck by familiarity regarding my previous conversation with Derpy. Ditzy. Whatever. Who, by the way, was also sitting down at my table. She hadn't said anything yet, one eye fixed on me and her other off examining the wall. She seemed content to simply sit and listen to us, even with the glances that were thrown her way by my new 'friends'. She gave a nod and a frown as I mentioned Discord, so at least I knew she was listening and not spaced out. "Seriously? That two faced jerk?" Anne Blue muttered, shaking her head. "What did he do?" "Messed with my memory," I muttered, trying to consolidate my story. "Kinda messed me up a bit, and I'm still kinda muddy on some things. Ditzy had to help me find my house," I admitted with a half truth. Ditzy gave an affirmatory 'mmf' at that, but didn't add anything more. "By the way, just in case I truly screw something up, I'm just sorta friends with you guys, right?" Glances were traded at that, to which Thrash immediately said "You owe me twenty bits, remem- GAH." Blue cut him off with yet another hoof expertly placed within Thrashes side, giving him an acidic glare to boot. "Nah, nah, we haven't talked all that much to be honest." "We have had precisely three conversations take place between you and this one," Balaan added. "This one has noticed that you have been... reclusive. Better to respect your privacy as opposed to making you feel uncomfortable, yes?" "And this?" I asked with a smirk, giving the table a gesture along with all its occupants. "You seemed more open today. Thrash suggested we extend an... orange branch, as he called it?" "Which by the way, the real saying is 'olive branch', not orange branch. Friggin dummy," she punctuated her last word with another strike in Thrashes side as Balaan wore a look of confusion. "Olive... I do not get it." Balaan admitted with a sigh. "The statement made more sense when it involved an orange." "Made about as much sense as you do," Black Anne Blue joked with a wide smile. "Thank you for your kind words," Balaan stated, much to Thrashes amusement. "So this maaaare~" Anne trilled, twitching her tail mischievously. "Anypony we know?" "Uhhh," I responded, "I don't really know if you know her. She's one of the element bearers? Her name's Rarity. She's a white unicorn with a purple mane, and runs a clothing boutique." "Ah!" Thrash exclaimed, drawing Black Annes' unbelieving gaze. "I know her! Oh don't look at me like that. I socialize! She made me this totally kickin' scarf that makes me look totally hot. Hotter even than I do now! I know, I know what you're thinking, Thrash is already so unspeakably hot there's no way he could possibly get any hotter. Well let me tell NYEEEAAAWK-" he cut off with a high pitched squawk, as Black Anne Blue buried her hoof in his side once again. "Geez girl, cut it out with all the hitting... You're gonna tenderize me if you keep that up..." "Just get to the point, you giant turkey. It's already a sunny day, we don't need you to make it worse with all the hot air you're filling the room with," she responded dismissively. "Fine, fine. She made me a scarf. It makes me look even more awesome by accentuating my feathers. Happy you ruined my story?" "Immensely," Black Anne Blue admitted with a smile. "This one can not explain why, but the ceasure of your tale causes this one happiness as well," Balaan stated with a low cough. "Low blow, dude," Thrash griped. "What? No. This one did not blow, what you heard was a cough. Apologies for your confusion." "I... damnit Balaan, I can never tell when you're joking," Thrash let out with a sigh. "She also clued me onto this shampoo that works on both my fur and my feathers. It even works better than the stuff I'd been using for years!" "I've seen her at the spa a couple times, but we've never talked. I think she's scared of me," Black Anne Blue admitted wistfully, before earning another squawk of pain from Thrash. "Can't imagine why," she stated with a smile. "I mean, it's not like I exactly 'exude' the type of class she's used to," she added with a pair of airquotes. "She always buys the super expensive spa package, at least she has every time I've been there and seen her." "This one has not met her," Balaan stated, noticing everyone looking at him for his two cents. "She sounds... lovely." "Lovely... yeah..." I muttered with a sigh. "Whats the matter big guy, trouble on the ninth cloud?" Black Anne Blue said with a knowing smile. "Well... I mean. She's a nice enough mare, I mean..." I fixed them with a wry look, "You've seen her, she's definitely pretty. I can't complain in that regard. It's just... well I don't remember her. At all in a meaningful way. I know her, I know of her. But I don't remember the relationship I'm supposed to have with her. According to her the whole reason I moved here is to be closer to her, so I have to assume I was at the very least heavily interested in her." "Ah. Sounds complicated. Can't say I have any suggestions for you mate," Thrash admitted, shaking his head in defeat. "I mean, the longest relationship I've had is with -NWAAAWK," he let out another squawk, glaring at Black Anne Blue as he rubbed at his side. "Yeah. We don't exactly have the most normal kind of relationship by most ponies standards. Ain't normal by gryphon standards, either. Any advice we could give probably wouldn't help you all that much." "Just because you're absolute rubbish at romance doesn't mean you can lump me in with you," Black Anne complained with a grumble. "Love you too hon," Thrash muttered, planting a kiss on top of her head as she continued to grumble at the public display of affection. She let out a low cough, obviously trying to fight down a blush. "A...anyway, your memory isn't going to be gone forever, right?" she finally asked after she had fought down her blush. "Eh, no. Rarity said she was just going to ask Twilight for a spell or something-" "She is Princess Celestias' student," Balaan blurted out suddenly. "If there is any such pony who could reverse a spell of Discords', it would be Twilight Sparkle. The princess' student has to be strong." "She helped with the parasprites..." Ditzy added. "Yeah!" Thrash agreed. "So basically, no, this shouldn't last for a long time. Discord himself thought it would wear off soon," I lied, "But in the meantime it's all kinds of awkward. I feel like I'm going to inadvertently insult her over something really stupid. I mean... look at me," I gestured at myself, and I could swear I hear DM and A giggling away in my bag. "I'm not exactly her level of class either. What if I completely screw myself over, make her not like me and completely depress myself when I finally get my memory back and realize I drove my own girlfriend off? I can't think of anything more pathetic, to be honest... And it's not like I can just fake the level of intimacy she obviously wants, for me it's like I just met her. For her we've been together for months. I was just trying to have a pleasant conversation yesterday when an errant word made her think I was asking her to move in with me. The mare is absolutely head over hooves for me, and I honestly have no idea why." A complete lie, the long and short was that Discord brain bamboozled her. The real question was whether or not she would still be... pleasant after everyones memory was returned to normal. There was no way in HELL Discords patchwork memories would stay indefinitely, he liked chaos so odds were good that he himself would take it down just to kick off the 'liar revealed' plot-line. I wouldn't put it past him to find something like that pretty hilarious. As overused as such a plot-line is. My lunch continued in relative comfort, allowing me to have an enjoyable conversation with a group of people I didn't want to stab my ears out after having listened to. They even apparently accepted Ditzy into their little group, they didn't have anything against her. Since she technically came in attached to me, they didn't have any problem grilling her with questions. Overall, it was a nice day. No having to go out into dangerous forests, scorching hot deserts or anything of the kind due to the fact that neither A nor DM picked up a model W signal. I didn't speak to Rarity, and she didn't try to contact me. I have to assume she was busy. I managed to prep myself as best I could, draining the two thousand bits from discords' sack into a drawer so I wouldn't lose the excess in case I needed it to buy more stuff to 'cheat with'. I really had to look into preparing contingencies for all the various elemental baddies I was sure to run into. I'd come across a plant, a water and a sort of... 'sand' themed boss. Not to mention the ninja themed Model P. That left plenty of potential elements and various bosses I could still come up against. I had yet to fight someone flame themed, but I already had my water attack so it shouldn't be that hard of a fight. I hope, anyway. Electricity would be a difficult sword to face, I really wish I had managed to finish off that plant tower boss when I had the chance. It was just before sundown, when Model P finally woke up.