A/N: The name "Trixie" was used 98 times in the story, not counting this note.
“Twilight!” Trixie shouted as she burst through the library door, “The Great and Powerful Trixie is, regretfully, in need of your assistance!” Like a tie that would rather suit her boisterous personality, the demand was haughty and somewhat crude.
The librarian, sipping on some tea in her favorite chair while enjoying a romance novel, The Alicorn’s Bride, looked at the mare in question from across the room. “T-Trixie?! Is that you?”
The great and powerful one threw a book at the ungrateful wretch for not knowing who Trixie is. While she’d never admit it publicly, aim was not one of her strong points. Thankfully, it missed. “Of course it’s Trixie. Now, Trixie needs you to-“
“Twilight!” Trixie shouted as she burst through the library door, “The Great and P-… Oh no! The impostor is already here!”
Twilight stood up, dumbfounded. “Wha- why are there two of you? And when did you… both… get back to Ponyville?”
“Trixie shall explain,” said Trixie. “When Trixie was in her laboratory, developing new magic tricks, T-“
“You have a lab?” Twilight interjected with a tone of both curiosity and surprise.
“Will you allow Trixie to finish? Now… where was Trixie. Ah, yes. Trixie discovered a unique trick that could temporarily create a copy that was both physically and emotionally similar to the correspondent. However, Trixie must have used too much magic and-“
“You created a new you?” she once again interrupted.
“All of this is technically true, except the undignified and horrendous copy has forgotten her place and is now parading Ponyville as me!” Trixie clarified with her rash voice and a hoof stomp.
“So said the clone!”
“No pony could truly copy Trixie!”
“Trixie cannot believe that Trixie would insinuate I, the Great and Powerful Trixie, am the doppelganger.”
Twilight, having enough with their incessant bickering, forcibly restrained their mouths with a spell of her own design. Like mirrors, they both replicated the same actions of shock that a muzzle had been placed, anger that they couldn’t speak, and an eyebrow raise of bemusement as to what the purple mare planned next. Twilight got out of her seat and approached them slowly. She made direct eye contact with each of them, one at a time, and whispered with irritation, “Now, when I let go, we’re going to calm down and get to the bottom of this. Ok?”
Reluctantly, they nodded in agreement. When the magic was released, Twilight conjured up some ear rings from her own accessory box and gave them to the Trixie to her left.
“What are these for?”
“Why doesn't Trixie get any?”
“Until I know who the real Trixie is, I need a way to separate the two of you. Other Trixie-“
“You mean, the real Trixie?”
Twilight sighed. “Anyways, the other Trixie will get this necklace. Both of them are similar in design with a blue star… oddly similar to your own cutie mark, so the only difference is where these are placed.” She did have to wonder how her own stuff matched well with both Trixie’s attire. Maybe it was a unicorn thing.
“What do you have planned for the Great and Powerful Trixie?” Trixie asked with a false air of regality.
“Well, as far as I can tell,” Twilight stated while walking to the kitchen, “you’re both exactly the same. So, in order to remedy the situation, we’ll just have to see which of you is the better.”
“And… how do you plan to do that?” they asked in unison.
“I’ve been reading a book lately that might give us the answer…”
___
The Trixie Twins sat at a round oak table that had two ornate goblets on it, filled with grape juice. They both glared at each other in contempt while slandering their own name by insulting one another. Twilight was in the kitchen, preparing something that was scented with rose petals and freshly baked bread. She then came back into the center of the library, with an annoyed look on her face, which was likely caused by the squabble between the two Trixies, and placed her front hooves on the table.
“Ok, Trixie and… Trixie, we’re going to have a battle of wits.”
“Ha! The imposter is sure to lose then,” stated Necklace Trixie, whom was on Twilight’s left. “The spell may have caused our bodies and minds to be similar, but our intelligence is vastly dissimilar.”
“Stop trying to confuse the librarian, Trixie. We both know I’m the real one.”
“The only thing we both know is that you’re a fraud!”
“Well if I’m a fraud then you’re a fraud, too!”
“You dare accuse the Great and Powerful T-“
“ENOUGH!” Twilight slammed the table while levitating the goblets so they wouldn’t spill. Both Trixies, surprisingly, silenced themselves. “Ok, in one of these goblets is poison joke powder. It is odorless, tasteless, dissolves instantly, and definitely poisonous.”
“Lethal?” Earing Trixie inquired.
“No, it’ll give you a magic related disease for a week, though, which should incapacitate the copy long enough for me to fix the problem. You have as long as you need to discuss and prove to me who the real Trixie is. Now, are we ready?”
“Very well,” Necklace Trixie sighed, “it shouldn’t take that long to prove to you I’m the real Trixie.”
“Nonsense, you fool. Twilight obviously put the powder in your drink to eliminate you because she knows that I am the real Trixie. No imposter could dream of mirroring Trixie’s radiant beauty and luscious eyes.”
“If fake Trixie is talking about that unkempt rat’s nest you call a mane, then yes, your beauty is most becoming of you.” Trixie scoffed at Trixie’s own wit.
“And you think you’re any better? Trixie is surprised you’re not a bird perch with how much your crow’s feet show.”
Twilight had to emit a small chuckle at that one. They were really going at it.
“Well, since I am better than you, Trixie, Trixie knows that Twilight put the poison in your drink because she knows I, the Great and Powerful Trixie, am the real Trixie. I can recall everything from our encounter with her. Can you, pseudo-Trixie?”
“Of course Trixie can, you hag. Which is why Twilight actually put it in my cup because she knew that I, Trixie, would know to never drink what was right in front of me. Clearly the poison is in this cup.” With a light blue aura, the two beverages were switched. Feeling absolutely confident in her decision, Earing Trixie rose her chin up.
Twilight had to admit, that was quite like her to be snobbish like that.
“Trixie thinks you’re an idiot, Ms. Trixie. Trixie is not afraid to admit, after her vanquishing of the great Ursa Major, that she was a bit frightened and skeptical of danger. Trixie knows that my double, replicating this same tendency, would put the cup as far away from her as possible. Clearly, Trixie cannot drink the cup in front of her.” With that, they switched again, giving Trixie and Trixie their own original cups.
“Foolish Trixie, you’ve been played for a card. Trixie knew that you’d try and outsmart Trixie, impossible as it is, so she gave herself the poison momentarily, knowing her replica would take it back.”
Necklace Trixie scoffed at the accusation. “Trixie is appalled that Trixie would think so lowly of Trixie. Trixie knew that the poison was actually in my cup the entire time.”
This caught both Twilight and Trixie off guard. “Trixie,” Trixie continued, “would rather die than have a shameless copy promote herself in such a disgusting way. You, Trixie, have no sense of honor.”
Actually slightly offended, the proof being in the blush, Trixie defied the worded assault. “Trixie admits that she may have had some shortcomings in the past, but Trixie is always willing to learn!”
“You’re no real Trixie,” Trixie shouted, “ Trixie would never stoop for help in such a lowly fashion and Trixie never would have sought out Twilight Sparkle for assistance!”
Twilight backed away from the table while the two lashed out at each other. It was getting juicier than she imagined this would get. While it was straining away from wit and more into emotion, it definitely would prove who was who either way.
“Trixie,” said Earing Trixie, “knows that she is the most powerful unicorn in all of Equestria, but even masters need an assistant sometimes. Only a fool, otherwise known as the Trixie in front of me with poison in her cup, would deny this.”
“How can one assist perfection?” Trixie announced astutely with utmost confidence riding in her tone.
Trixie, having enough to do with Trixie, decided to play her trump card. “If you’re the real Trixie, then prove your emotions are real. We all know those who aren’t real manifestations cannot have real feelings and we’ve both proved our physical attributions. Trixie can prove hers instantly.”
“Trixie would love to see how not-real Trixie could do that.”
Earing Trixie stepped out from the table and approached Twilight with a certain allure in her eyes. “Uh, I-I’d prefer to stay out of this as much as possible,” Twilight stammered while backing up slowly. Trixie wouldn’t have anything of it, pulled in the unicorn’s head close and delicately planted a kiss on her lavender cheek.
Necklace Trixie was mortified. “TRIXIE WOULD NEVER KISS HER ENEMIES CHEEK YOU HARLOT!” Twilight stood there like a statue, not sure of what just happened.
“And Trixie would never shriek in such an undignified manner or drink what she knew was poison in her cup.” Both drinks switched again while Trixie made her way back to the table.
They both stared each other down with venom in their eyes. Both Trixie’s knew they had the other outmatched.
“A-are you both r-ready?” the purple unicorn stammered while rubbing her hoof on her cheek to remove the invisible lip stain.
With vigor, they took a hearty swig from their drink of choice, much like shots, and slammed the cups on the table.
___
With her rose and daisy sandwich ready from the oven, Twilight stepped back into the main room of the library which had two stretchers with one Trixie on each.
Spike, who had been resting upstairs, came down and absorbed the scene and instantly knew what had transpired. “The ‘tainted both goblets’ routine… huh?” He stretched out his arms and gave a relaxing yawn. “It’s a shame they both had to go like that. You didn’t have to lie to them about it not being deadly. You should have told them it’s potent when injested.”
“Yeah, but they wouldn’t have done it if they didn’t. I know that the real Trixie never would have taken such a dangerous bet. She’s arrogant, but not that stupid. Did you know that one of them kissed me on the cheek?”
“Whoa, I wonder how Big Macintosh is going to take that?” Spike asked with an air of smugness.
“Leeet’s sweep it under the rug.”