//------------------------------//
// Chapter 3 
// Story: Bork & Pinkie 
// by anotheraccount 
//------------------------------//


Chapter 3 - Al Corn Pone


        “Bork Bork Bork!” sang the Chef and Pinkie as they finished singing and threw their wooden spoons over their shoulders.

        "I'm feeling hungry for something made out of cornmeal, Chef.  How about you...do you like corn pone?" grinned Pinkie Pie as she looked at the Chef.

The Chef looked over at Pinkie, and then rubbed his hands together as a smile grew on his face.  “Mmmmm, yum yum zee bread du kern is gud, gud gud, ya!”  He clapped his hands twice, then reached to the side of the counter and grabbed a medium-sized mixing bowl.  He spun it around and then set it in front of Pinkie Pie.

“Thanks a lot, Chef!” said Pinkie as she grinned and clopped her front hooves.  “Now, first, we add the cornmeal…”  Pinkie reached under the counter and pulled out a bag of cornmeal.  “Hmm, don’t get many chances to use this when making cakes and sweets.  Good thing we can get this used up before it expires!”

As she sat at her table, Twilight watched the scene unfold and scratched her head.  But... why would they have cornmeal in the bakery?  I don’t think they make anything that contains cornmeal in Sugar Cube Corner, thought Twilight to herself.  Then again, sometimes it’s best not to think too hard about what Pinkie Pie is doing.  Twilight shrugged and sat back in her chair and continued watching.

Standing up on two legs, Pinkie Pie began adding ingredients to the bowl.  She looked over at the Chef and smiled.  “Hey, Chef, could you reach over and get one of the mixing spoons for me?”

Shaking his head with enthusiasm, the Chef rubbed his hands together.  “Ya, ya, spoon ya!”  He reached over to the side of the counter and grabbed a large mixing spoon and with a flourish presented it to Pinkie.  “Spoooooon!” he said dramatically and gave the spoon to Pinkie.

Pinkie Pie began to giggle and the Chef’s antics.  “Heeheehee, thanks Chef!”  Pinkie began mixing the thick batter and looked up to see that Twilight was also chuckling over at her table.

The Chef watched the thickness and texture of the batter closely as Pinkie Pie stirred.  He nodded, and then reached under the counter.  Swiftly, he pulled out a cast iron skillet and carefully placed it onto the counter next to the mixing bowl.

“Thanks Chef, you read my mind!” said Pinkie.  “Cast iron skillets are great for baking corn pone!”  She began slowly pouring the batter into the skillet, and then looked over the counter to where Twilight was sitting.  “Corn pone and cornbread are similar, but different.  Corn pone also has some interesting history to it, doesn’t it?”

“Yah, yah, zee corn pone bakee in zee hissz toori,” said the Chef as he began retelling the story of one of the possible origins of corn pone.

Twilight watched the Chef as he enthusiastically shared  the story, moving his hands an gesturing to add dramatic emphasis to the story.  Pinkie Pie put the skillet into the oven and then watched the Chef as he continued telling the story.  Every few minutes PInkie would nod in agreement.  I’ll have to get PInkie Pie to tell me the story later, thought Twilight.  She watched as the Chef finished talking and nodded his head.

“And that’s the story of corn pone!” said Pinkie as she clopped her front hooves.  “Ok, now let’s check on the oven.  It should be done right about…” she paused and then pointed at the oven.  “Now!”  she said as the timer’s bell rang.  She opened the oven and pulled out the skillet, and then placed it onto a cooling pad on the counter that the Chef had thoughtfully placed for her.  She opened a drawer and pulled out a small knife and placed it onto the counter.  “Normally we want to let this cool for a few minutes, but I love it when it is hot out of the oven.  The butter melts all over it and it is so good!”  She started to cut the corn pone, but stopped immediately with a surprised look and dropped the knife as she backed away from the counter.

“Hey, you!  What’s the big idea?” yelled a voice from behind the counter.

The corn pone began to rise out of the pan and slowly its shape began to change.  The shape standing in the skillet slowly formed into a pony-shaped corn pone.  It turned its head to face PInkie Pie and then stepped out of the skillet.  Pinkie Pie gasped as it continued walking towards her and then the corn pone stopped.  It quickly grabbed the knife on the counter and alternated between pointing it and Pinkie and the Chef.

“Now look here, see?  Nopony messes with Al Corn Pone and gets away with it.  But today, I’m feeling generous, see?  So, here’s what we’re gonna do.”  Al Corn Pone took two more steps towards Pinkie and the Chef.  “One, you two are gonna scram.  Two, I’m gonna help myself to what you’ve got behind the counter here.  Got it?”

Pinkie Pie and the Chef nodded as they slowly backed further away from the counter.  Walking backwards so they could keep an eye on Al Corn Pone, they walked around the counter and over to sit beside Twilight.  With a shocked and confused expression, Twilight looked over at Pinkie Pie as she sat down at the table.  “Are we seriously in the middle of a robbery by something you just baked?”

With an anguished expression on her face, PInkie PIe nodded, and then began wailing.  “Yes, it’s tru-u-u-ue.  This is worse than then Baked Bads...now we’ve made Baked Bad Guys!”  Pinkie Pie hugged Twilight, and the Chef patted Pinkie’s back.

        Loud banging noises continued to come from behind the counter, until finally there was a yell followed by the sound of a drawer opening.  “Now, that’s more like it!”

        Twilight, Pinkie Pie, and the Chef looked towards the counter and watched as Al Corn Pone walked out into the sitting room of the bakery and proceeded to walk towards the door.  He pulled a bag behind him that jingled with each step.

        Watching as the Baked Bad Guy arrived at the door, Twilight gave an exasperated groan.  “Ok, this has gone far enough.”  She lit her horn in preparation of a spell, but cancelled the spell as a loud bang filled the room.

        With a rush of cold air, Rainbow Dash flew into the bakery and landed in the middle of the room.  Laughing loudly, she walked over to the table shared by Twilight, Pinkie, and the Chef.  “Oh, man, did you guys see Rarity?”  Noticing the Chef for the first time, Dash tilted her head.  “Huh, so she really was telling the truth.”  Turning her head at the sound of bits hitting the floor, Dash walked back over to the door and closed it.  “Ooh, corn pone!”  In a flash, Rainbow Dash dove forward like a hawk.  Before anypony could say a single word, Dash had eaten all of the flattened corn pone on the wall.

        Dash licked her lips and smiled in satisfaction.  “Wow, that was good!  When you guys bake, you really bake!”  She looked down and saw the half-filled bag of bits as well as the bits on the floor.  “Um, Pinkie...you know there are better places for keeping your bits, right?”