Chapter The One After
The school bell rang. Apple Bloom and her fellow pupils knew what that meant. None of them were entirely sure how the bell came to be, they only knew the reason the bell was rang: it was time for class. They would likely be disappointed to learn that there is not an old, wise stallion who lives in the tower and sets his clock every morning to match the one in the classroom, as Miss Cheerilee had told them.
Cheerilee rang the bell again. She had always thought that nurturing the creativity and imagination of young fillies and colts would greatly improve their brain capacity later in life. It was one of the reasons that she became a teacher. As such, she preferred not to tell them that it was her who ascended the tower and rang the bell herself. She half-hoped that some of her students would sneak up the simple wooden stairs looking for the aged fictional stallion. Perhaps the Cutie Mark Crusaders would be up for the task. Alas, their recess activities always proved too important.
The bell tolled a third time. Apple Bloom took her place at her desk. She was both dreading and anticipating the day ahead. Her best friends, Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle, were both absent that day, and her nemesis, Diamond Tiara, was taking every opportunity to berate and bully her. On the bright side, she still had plans to meet with them in the afternoon for all sorts of fun.
She was unaware that her two chums were on a difficult moral journey during which they would harness their skills and come to terms with themselves and with each other. They travelled to far off lands and encountered all manner of dangerous creatures and situations. One of the two fell in love. One took the life of another. Both of them realized just how privileged they were to live in the organized society of Equestria.
Neither of them earned their cutie marks. To add insult to injury, they wouldn't be home in time to share the afternoon with Apple Bloom.
Despite this, none of Apple Bloom nor Sweetie Belle nor Scootaloo nor Diamond Tiara nor Cheerilee nor the old pony in the bell tower had anything whatsoever to do with Twilight Sparkle or our charming narrator pal. As such, the previous 389 words, in addition to the next 173, were all entirely pointless wastes of everyone's time. While one might classify one's time as valuable, rest assured, the time spent reading this story (or an other story written by myself) has already been classified as wasted. You may opt to reclassify this time as “used effectively”, but that would require delving into the deep, gurgling pits of bureaucracy, causing permanent damage in one's hand or hand analogue by filling out all sorts of paperwork, then grappling with dozens of identically dressed businessmen and businesswomen, the deep desire of each of them to make you move as far from them and their business as they can manage in as little time as possible. It has been said that their collective motto is “Shut Up And Go Away”.
I'm sorry, I may have strayed ever so slightly from the topic at hand. There's no need to sharpen the pitchforks and light the torches, the true story will resume shortly.
Let it be known that “shortly” has been redefined to mean “next chapter”.