The rooster's crow and the rays of daybreak roused her from her quilted bed. The pounding at her bedroom door made her shield her ears with her pillows, and the rising sun caused her eyes to squeeze themselves further in. Suddenly the sheets had been pulled out from over her and Applejack flailed her legs wildly with a silly scream as she tumbled to the floor. Gradually, she calmed down, and then turned her head to see an unamused Apple Bloom with the quilted comforter between her teeth that she soon spat out onto the floor.
"It's not like you to sleep in like that," said Apple Bloom. "I mean, today is your date, right?"
"Apple Bloom!" yelled Granny Smith from downstairs. "It's almost time for your schoolin’!"
"You gotta tell me all about it tomorrow. See ya soon!"
Date? A thought surfaced from the depths of her memory that she had been dreading her impending date all night. Tossing and turning in the bed along with one too many shots of hard apple cider did nothing to calm the farm pony, and the end result was a messy mane, bloodshot eyes, and a nervous heart. She half-wished to herself to blow off the date, but that would be unbecoming of a mare who was known throughout Ponyville to keep her word. She also did not want to disappoint her little sister as well. Apple Bloom looked eager to hear about how it all went down.
In the bathroom, Applejack took a little more time to brush her mane, tail, and the rest of her fur. She also remembered that on dates, a mare needed to look her best, and was eager to use the makeup kit Rarity had gifted her from long ago. As it turned out, what remained of it was a worn out lipstick container and a sliver of powder. Then she remembered that everypony except her used it. Apple Bloom borrowed it for her slumber party with her friends, and Rarity, who had visited during the annual Apple Family hoedown, used most of it after a rowdy hog splashed mud on her face.
It didn't matter anyway. Applejack would not know how to apply it. She had no time because the hour was passing, and Granny Smith yelled at her to come down. The farm pony galloped out and downstairs to the ground floor with her father's Stetson hat resting on her mane. Granny Smith sat in her rocking chair with a bit of a frown directed towards her granddaughter.
"Whaddya doin' youngin?" asked the elderly matriarch. "If an Apple is late for anythin', the whole town's gonna question your reliability. Now, I really don't wanna be judgmental in your choice of life partners, but if this is the path you gonna take, then you should go at it all the way. The Apple way. I'm sure that if your parents were still here, they'd probably be more okay with it than I would be. Now, move along! Even if you are a lady, it's impolite to keep a good lady waitin'."
A lady? Applejack remembered asking out a mare, but the name currently escaped her. The frozen frown on Granny Smith meant that it was time to head outside before the tension boils over. The old matriarch didn't appear keen on the mares-dating-mares business, but at least she was trying to tolerate it. After all, this situation could have turned out worse.
Applejack stepped out of her home into a world of warm rays of sunshine. At one area of the vast farmlands, Big Mac towed a large wagon through the fertile turnip fields in the midst of his tireless harvesting. At another horizon grew a patchwork of vibrant apple trees unhindered by acidic clouds and acidic rain. The skies could not be any clearer and free from polluting airships and jets. Why shouldn't it be? This was the world she lived in.
Though nervous about the date, Applejack kept a positive mind as she trotted happily on the dirt road leading to Ponyville. She did not have to watch out for cars, and she did not have to worry about accidentally stepping on old landmines leftover from the war.
However, she felt a dark shadow creeping from behind her. Applejack subconsciously shuddered from the feeling of a sprinkle striking her fur. It must be a spring shower. Then a piece of hail attacked her rear. She froze tensely. She hunched herself forwards, ready to summon her Element of…
She didn't have it. It wasn't hanging off her neck. But Applejack wasn't going to be deterred by a lack of weapon. The winged enemy was right above her, and--
"Lookie here, it's the mare of the hour."
The voice sounded familiar, and very tomboyish. Applejack turned around saw Rainbow Dash poking her head over a cloud she was resting on.
"Rainbow Dash?"
"The one and only. Oh, uh, don't mind me. I'm just making sure that your date goes perfectly by kicking away all the rogue clouds. I also want you to know that I definitely will not be watching you two make out."
"Why would you say that you ain't watching me?"
"I just wanted to make sure that you know that I won't be watching you," Dash winked.
"But sayin' that means that--"
"Hey, look at the time! Gotta clear up those clouds at the west side before the boss yells at me."
"RD, you don't have a watch."
"I do! See? Bye!"
The blue pegasus had flashed her wrist for a second before she sped off, leaving a streak of rainbow behind her. Clearly she did not have a watch, and the poor imitation of it drawn in black marker made her act foolish. Still, Applejack could not help but nervously smirk as she continued her path towards the meeting place. She could shake off the embarrassment she received from a friend, but as she walked further towards the town, the waves and smiles of the many ponies she passed by, she could feel the nervousness creep up. All eyes were on her, and the whole town was aware of the big date.
She was supposed to meet up at the library, and she expected a plain beige building. That got her a bit lost and confused, and a pair of ponies sitting rather awkwardly on a bench waved at her while she looked around. Like the rest of the townsfolk, they appeared friendly enough. She should know, because sitting with her back resting against the bench was the unicorn mare Lyra Heartstrings, and the other one was an earth pony named Bon Bon, who winced at the obvious pain on affecting her back as she attempted to imitate the position of her close friend. Very close, to be exact. Applejack swore she saw them nuzzling each other very lovingly in her peripheral vision.
"Are you lost, Applejack?" Lyra asked.
"Kinda," replied the farm pony. "You mind tellin' me where the library is?"
"Oh, I get it. This must be a test, isn't it Bon Bon? Let's see, if you turn left you won't miss it. It's basically a giant golden oak tree that's not just a library, but also a house. Am I right?"
"Applejack, is there something wrong?" asked the dulcet-voiced Bon Bon.
"Nothing's wrong 'sides the usual," replied Applejack. “Didn’t get a lot of sleep last night, and my head ain't in the right place. I jus' have this crazy notion that Ponyville was all slummy.”
“That’s a really strong imagination there, Applejack.”
“You must have had a bad dream,” added Lyra.
“I must've,” said Applejack. “I imagined Bon Bon being some warden of a megaprison, and Lyra didn't have her horn."
"Me without a horn?" gasped Lyra as she raised her front hooves to touch her horn. "I can't imagine myself without one!"
"Some ponies do say I can be domineering," said Bon Bon. "Like they think I've been a secret agent in a previous life."
"You were very domineering in bed."
"Lyra, not in public."
"But Applejack and--"
"Let's not spoil her, Lyra. That is something she'll have to discover on her own. Applejack, we should get together sometime. You know, on a double date for the four of us."
"Or a threesome if things don't work out for you," winked Lyra.
"Again, let's not spoil Applejack."
Bon Bon leapt off the bench and cracked her back before uttering a sigh of relief. She vigorously motioned to Lyra to follow her and respectfully leave Applejack alone to enjoy her date before waving goodbye to her.
Applejack swore that when she first met them, they were clothed and rendered emotionless through a harsh political regime. She grunted from a sudden dull pain in her head, and then she heard a loud, rumbling crack. It did not sound like thunder. Rather, it sounded like murmuring glaciers running against one another, but she felt it in her soul. Applejack turned around, expecting to see a crack somewhere, and when she looked, she saw nothing. Nothing except blue skies and a rogue cloud hovering above her.
Rainbow Dash must still be stalking her. Applejack snorted over the pegasus's nosiness, but if she scared her off, that blue pegasus would soon find some other way to follow her. Dash was not exactly interrupting her day, and so she decided to tolerate her watchful presence as she trotted her way towards the Golden Oaks Library.
Just as Bon Bon had said, Applejack did not miss it. The Golden Oaks Library appeared smack dab in the middle of a pleasant clearing, centrally accessible to anypony with a thirst for learning. It was a literal and breathing treehouse with a pleasant balcony installed at the very top and a busy beehive hanging off one of its branches. This was certainly more welcoming than the beige government buildings she was used to seeing…
Why was she thinking about beige buildings? The pain struck her again, she heard the crack. Once more Applejack turned around and saw nothing out of the ordinary besides Rainbow Dash hiding behind the same rogue cloud.
Applejack gathered herself for a few seconds before she pounded on the red entrance door. It opened, and instead of a pony answering it, an owl was the first to greet her. She saw Spike sitting on a stack of books behind a chessboard that sat on top of a slightly taller stack of books amongst towers of books stacked haphazardly all about the library. The owl sat on his post, which was also a stack of books that was in front of the chessboard, and resumed his deep thought process of calculating his next move against the baby dragon.
"Spike, what's goin' on?" Applejack asked as she cautiously stepped in. "Is it reshelving day?"
"It might as well be," he said. "We just did it yesterday, but somepony had to take it all down because she couldn't sleep last night. She's over there in the book fort."
When she found the book fort at the other end of the room, Applejack chuckled lightly at the utter dorkiness of the scene. It might have been a practical joke set up by Spike and Owlowiscious, but here Twilight snoozed on a pile of books, and a literal book fort had sprung up around her. Applejack wished she had her wrist computer to take a picture…
But she never had one.
“Waffles!” Twilight cried as she abruptly woke herself up. The fort of books collapsed, causing Applejack, Spike, and Owlowiscious to rush to her aid. The purple unicorn eventually swam out and ended up on her back exposing her cute belly with a surprised look on her face.
“Applejack, you’re here!” Twilight exclaimed. “Uh, Spike, you and Owlowiscious can take a day off for today, but be ready at six tomorrow sharp so we do another library reshelving.”
“All right!” cried the baby dragon. “Owlowiscious, let’s hit up the arcades! Button Mash is gonna get pwned!”
With a sack of bits slung over his shoulder, Spike ran out the door with Owlowiscious flying ahead of them. The door slammed behind them, and Applejack nervously stood silent with her teeth biting into her lips.
“Wait, we have an arcade?” Applejack asked.
“We always had an arcade,” said Twilight as she rose back to her hooves while shaking some books off of herself. “They move them around town time to time depending on which pony has electricity or magic crystals.”
"I thought the Ponyville Municipal Government banned them."
"They haven't. Sure, there were petitions to limit their usage, and the Mayor has recently signed a bill to allow them to operate certain hours for the children."
"Oh yeah. I can't believe I forgot about that." Applejack heard that low cracking noise again. Where was that coming from?
"Sorry," spoke Twilight. "I guess I woke up late."
"Couldn't sleep either, huh?"
Twilight shook her head. "I was up all night reading 1,001 Successful Dating Tips. It was an old edition, and it didn't address mares dating mares, but the basic ideal should still be the same. Thus, I have everything all planned out in my handy-dandy notepad right here. First we go shopping downtown, and then we eat lunch at the Café. After that we'll go bowling and then have dinner at Fluttershy's cottage. Of course, if you have any other suggestions, I’m open to it. There's a lot of pages left on this notepad.”
“That schedule’s good 'nuff for me. C'mon Sugarcube. I don't wanna waste any more time moseying around. I want this date to be the best as it can be, or my name isn't Applejacqueline. That's my distant aunt's name, believe it or not."
Twilight nodded. Graciously she allowed Applejack to escort out of the library, but not before putting a sign on the front doorknob that read "library still open: please sign out any book you have borrowed." That was pretty trusting for the unicorn, but with a pleasant town like this, Applejack could imagine the lack of crime. At least leaving the library open to the public did not appear to make Twilight nervous, but Applejack wasn't entirely sure that was the case.
"So, um, where do you wanna go?" Applejack asked.
"I dunno," replied Twilight. "Wherever you want."
"You get to make the choice, Sugarcube. I'm sure there is one store you've been itchin' to go for the past week."
"I’ve been meaning to go the book depot to buy new editions for my library. Then again, maybe you want to go somewhere else that's more exciting and less booky."
"I don't mind."
"You'll probably be standing around for hours, and the depot doesn't have a lot of farm books that might interest you."
"Honest to goodness, I really won't mind."
She could see the nervous wince on her date's face. Clearly she wanted to buy more books, and at the same time, she did not want to bore Applejack. On the other hoof, Applejack did not want to bore her date as well, especially if she suggested going to the farm supply store.
But maybe they could be adventurous. Instead of going to a store they want to go, they should go to one they had never been into. And if they get bored, they would get bored together and leave without regrets.
"I got an idea, Twi," smiled Applejack. "Close your eyes."
"What for?"
"Trust me."
Once the unicorn eyelids sealed themselves, Applejack began spinning her date in place. "Keep 'em closed," Applejack said, and she continued spinning Twilight without causing her any sense of dizziness. The unicorn giggled after a few revolutions, especially when Applejack's hooves rubbed onto her cute belly. There was no confusion on Twilight's face. She appeared anxiously excited at the end result of Applejack's motive.
"Okay, you can open them now," said Applejack at the final spin.
"So, what was that about?"
"I decided to play a lil' roulette on where should we go, and it looks like your horn is pointin' at the frilly shop over there."
"Carousel Boutique? Rarity's dress shop?"
"Rarity owns that shop?"
"She does. I thought you knew that already."
"I… must've had a brain fart or somethin'. Wow, what kind of shop is it?"
"A high-end custom clothing store."
"Oh."
"You don't have to go if you don't want to."
"I'm not one to back out against a deal I promised myself, Twi. Besides, I figured it'd be a lotta fun jus' to browse."
"You're not one for dresses, Applejack."
"But I'm still a mare. C'mon, Twi, we'll just take a quick look."
It was a short trot over to Carousel Boutique. Like the Golden Oaks Library, it was situated in the middle of the clearing. It did not seem it would get a lot of business being out of the way from the main shopping district, and Applejack saw no bustle. One could only imagine that this place was chosen for its unique design and low overhead costs.
The purple door with the diamond windows swung open, triggering the delightful twinkling bell attached on the upper doorsill. No pony appeared to be present, thank the earth, but there were several racks of custom-made dresses. Half of were frilly, and the other half were glittery. There were some that Applejack admitted were slick and chic based on her limited awareness in fashion. She preferred dresses that were maneuverable, and the decorative saddles seemed to be a match for her. Too bad there weren't any galoshes on display.
At least these dresses piqued Twilight's interest. The purple unicorn gravitated to rack filled with ones of dark colors and stars. Though she would look pretty in that, Twilight preferred the green transparent one dotted with round pearls of white, blue, and green. It looked expensive, though. Applejack checked her purse to doubly make sure she did not have enough bits to spend and splurge. She really wanted to, but that meant taking a mortgage out on the farm or raiding Apple Bloom's college fund.
"Good morning," sang a voice, "and welcome to the Carousel Boutique. Oh my stars, you're here!"
A pretty white unicorn descended down the spiral staircase and gasped when she saw Twilight and Applejack. She increased her gallop to speeds comparable to a rainbow-maned pegasus and stopped in the middle of the floor bouncing up and down like a certain hyperactive pink earth pony.
"I figured you two would be going somewhere romantic, like Canterlot,” grinned Rarity, “but I am ecstatic that you've decided to grace your presence in my humble little shop.”.
"We're just browsing," said Applejack. "That's all."
"That's all? Oh, no-no-no, that will not do. You should definitely try some of the dresses I made with you two in mind."
"Rares, we ain't gettin' married."
"Nopony said anything about marriage, but now that I think about it, I had been sketching a number of ideas ever since you asked Twilight out."
"It's just a date."
"And you must make the most of it. Now, which one of you fine ladies want to try on some of these fine dresses? We have the whole shop to ourselves."
"I suppose I can go first," said Twilight. "You sure you are okay with it, Applejack?"
"Sure thing, Sugarcube. I promise I won't be bored."
The farm pony took her seat on a nearby stool. Next to her in a basket was a white Persian cat with a ribbon and a jeweled collar. Applejack exchanged one brief look with the feline before it resumed licking its paws and then stretching itself on the fluffed blanket.
At least this cat is normal, thought Applejack.
Eventually, Twilight emerged from behind the privacy screen and stepped onto the platform that served as the stage. The interior lights dimmed, and several spotlights shone from top and bottom upon the purple unicorn and the dress she wore. It was that blue one with stars, and gosh darn it she looked so pretty. Applejack could not suppress her smile, but she did not want to holler like a hick that some ponies accused her of being.
A disco ball had been lowered from the ceiling, and the thumping of electronic music bellowed from tall speakers jutting from the side of the stage. A barrage of flash photography pelted Twilight, but it did nothing to faze her. Applejack swore there was no other pony in the shop. One moment she was by herself with the cat, and in the next moment a blue earth pony photographer wearing a black gothic lolita dress and pink shades suddenly appeared to snap pictures left and right. Applejack had seen her before, but she could not remember where or when. Applejack’s eyes trailed back to Twilight’s rump as she retreated to the privacy screen before the next dress change. Applejack could not miss it. Applejack could not be distracted.
For a few hours, Twilight modeled herself in this impromptu fashion show. After going through several dresses that were too green, too yellow, too poofy, not poofy enough, too frilly, and too shiny, she finally ended on a light-blue formal dress with a large orange bow wrapped around her waist. Applejack never expected Twilight to tire out in a fashion show, and she always thought it was easy work for the models Rarity hired.
"That was a lot of fun," said Twilight as she stepped off the stage, "and this impromptu fashion show brought in a few ponies inside."
"Thanks to you, I have sold half of my current stock," said Rarity, "and I am already booked months ahead for commissions."
"I'm amazed that you can find the time considerin' your princess duties back at the Empire," said Applejack.
"Beg your pardon?"
"Seriously? Doesn't 'Diamond Princess Rarity' ring a bell?"
"Diamond Princess Rarity… My, that has a nice ring to it. In my youth, I have fantasized that I was orphan princess of a lost empire, and that my one true love would eventually burst through that door someday and whisk me away to a far off kingdom. Even if that turned out to be an unobtainable dream, I am content with my present lot in life. Anyway, I still have the DJ rented out for the next few hours, and I asked Photo Finish to hang around. Perhaps you might want to take your place on the fashion stage."
"Me? I appreciate it, but I ain't sure I'm suited to be in a dress like yours. My muscles might tear through your clothes, and I didn't quite wash my mane since yesterday."
"Oh, pish posh. I can wash your mane and dry it in ten minutes or less. Fear not for my fabrics, Applejack darling. They are made from the finest materials from all of Equestria."
"Equestri-wha?
"I really want to see you in a dress, Applejack," said Twilight. "I bet you would look so pretty."
No use hiding her blush before the two unicorns. Applejack wasn't a dressy kind of girl, but if it would make Twilight happy, she would suffer herself to dress in a clown suit and dance the Pony Pokey with three pears shoved in her mouth.
Boy, what she would give to don herself in a clown suit. It was not enough for Rarity to slap a dress on the farm pony. Her hooves had to be manicured, her mane and tail shampooed and scented, and her own body fur waxed. Then there was the fitting, and there were times she nearly suffocated with Rarity tightening the corset string around her chest.
She could definitely feel her ribs and muscles screaming in agony underneath the mighty silk fabric. She waddled onto the stage like a stiff board, and already the cameras flashed on her eyes. The electronic music boomed onto her ears, and despite it all, nopony felt sorry for her embarrassment. They cheered, hooted, hollered, and clapped happily, and most of that came from the purple unicorn sitting on the stool next to the white cat. Nothing else mattered as long as that cute bookworm was happy, and for once Applejack had no regrets donning a frou-frou dress.
After several more wardrobe changes, Applejack became exhausted, and she slumped on the floor of the powder room. She did not recall her muscles being so sore, but it was well worth it to put a smile on Twilight's face. Eventually she mustered the strength to get back on her hooves. She stood in front of a mirror and saw a different pony before her eyes. Lipstick, eyeshadow, and mane tied into a bun. Applejack intended no disrespect when she wiped off her makeup and undid her mane, but she did admit to her heart that she'd definitely turn stallion heads towards her. She would not mind it though, but all she wanted by her side was a certain purple unicorn. As such, Twilight came in with a bottle of water uncapped, and gave it to Applejack to quench upon.
"I had a lot of fun," Twilight said. "Did you?"
"Didn't wanna admit it, but yeah, I did," replied Applejack. "In the end, though, I still like the Plain Jane look of farmer Applejack. No offense to cousin Plain Jane."
"That's what a love about you. You're always so honest with yourself."
Applejack watched on the reflection her Twilight hugging her from behind. Her muzzle was so close that she could smell her sweet scent past the perfume. She never kissed a mare before. She never kissed anypony, but maybe, just maybe…
Then her eyes widened, and she looked at the diamond-studded clock on the wall on the mirror's reflection.
"Hey, Twi," said Applejack. "What time’s our reservation?"
"One hour wait?" Applejack cried. "What kind of malarkey is that? I made that reservation three days ago!"
"Unfortunately, our restaurant policies dictate that if you are late one hour, we will have to declare your advanced reservation null and void," said the mustachioed headwaiter.
"But we were only late fifty-five minutes! Look, I'll pay you extra if you can get us in."
"Applejack, it's okay," said Twilight. "We can go somewhere else. It looks like they are full."
The farm pony calmed down when she felt the touch of Twilight's hoof on her shoulder. She sulked away with her date trotting behind her, but the anger still lingered. She did not have the heart to cause a scene, especially with a few ponies looking at them from the outdoor seating area.
"Damn snooty waiter must've got somethin' 'gainst mares lovin' each other," Applejack mumbled.
"I really don't think that's the case," said Twilight. "Like he said, the café is full, and no matter how you look at it, we are late."
"I'm sorry, Twi. I wanted to take you somewhere fancy, but that's the only place I can think of."
"There's always the Hay Burger."
"You sure 'bout that, Sugarcube?"
"Just because I'm from Canterlot doesn't mean I'm not above fast food."
"You're from Canterlot?"
"I am. Didn't I mention that when we first met?"
"You did, but… um, never mind."
The Hay Burger bustled close to the brim, just like the Café. It was noisy, filled with screaming babies and vapid valley girl chatterboxes. At least the restaurant fulfilled the criteria befitting its fast food nature, and in no time, they received their order and found their table.
The unicorn and the earth pony had a brief fight at the counter on which one of them should pay for the meals, but Applejack won out in the end by shoving almost all her bits to the cashier. She was beginning to regret it though. Twilight ordered three Double Hays and three super-size horseshoe fries. Applejack knew she was hungry, but good heavens can Twilight wolf down her food like a hungry hog. Applejack knew herself to be a big eater, but she could not stomach ordering more for herself lest she eat into the bowling admission fee. The farm pony had to compensate by ordering a Junior Hay Burger, Value Fries, and a small drink.
"If fere fomefing wron wif your meal?" Twilight asked with a mouthful and ketchup stains on her cheeks.
"Nah, I'm fine," replied Applejack. "I jus' wanna take my time with my food."
"You sound like Rarity when you say that. Though I am surprised you didn't order much for yourself."
"I'm on a diet."
Her Twilight accepted the little lie, and resumed gobbling her meal. The lack of a big lunch was no total loss. Applejack would rather watch Twilight eat, for her gluttonous side was so gosh darn adorkable. The actual food were just appetizers. Being with her was the main course.
"Would the lovely couple like a refill?" said the waiter.
"We're okay," said Applejack.
"How about an after dinner mint?"
"Dinner? It's lunchtime. As a matter of fact, this joint shouldn't have a fancy-dressed waitress. Who are you?"
"Pinkie Pie?" asked Twilight. "What are you doing here? And what's with the lame disguise?"
"Pinkie Pie?" asked the pink pony in a tuxedo and a fake handlebar mustache. "Who is this Pinkie Pie? I am Girl Incognito, waitress extraordinaire. I am here to serve you."
"I'm pretty sure we can refill our drinks ourselves," said Applejack. "The fountain's over there."
"Girl Incognito insists that she serves you. Besides, your drinks are empty."
"That's because you just drank them right in front of us!"
"Girl Incognito strikes again!"
The pink wonder swiped the couple's empty paper cups, refilled it at the fountain, and gave it back in a flash. In plain sight, she snuck of to the side entrance to twirl her fake mustache with an evil laugh before bouncing away. Applejack made sure that she did not steal her or Twilight's fries, and to her fortune, they remained in their greasy packaging.
"That was… weird," said Twilight.
"That's jus' Pinkie bein' Pinkie," said Applejack. "I swear, everypony is so bent at watching our date."
"That does explain why Rainbow Dash is secretly following us from a cloud and why Rarity is across the street with her gold binoculars. Does it bother you?"
"It's pretty annoyin' if you ask me."
"I think it's nice of them to be worried about us. Now that we know that they are stalking us, we can just go on about our date regardless. Unless you want to do something kinky out in the open."
"Um, I don't think I'm ready to do that yet."
"I'm sorry. Was I too forward? I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."
"I'll admit that was out of the blue."
"I read other books that talk about being flirty with your date, but none of them could tell me when it was appropriate to do so. "
"Granny Smith tells me that these kinds of things comes naturally. Twi, don't fret about it. Let's just treat this date as a playdate between friends, and whatever happens, happens. So, you up for some bowlin'?"
"That I have read about on the night before. I'm pretty sure I can make at least 170 on my first try."
So many times Applejack wanted to trot up to her, pull her up to hind legs, press her body onto her back, and then link hooves in order to teach her how to properly bowl a ball. The unicorn had had insisted in doing it on her own, and she had spread her summoned books, notes, and charts all over the table by their seats of their lane. The first few balls she bowled ended up in the gutter, and the next few were one-pin hits. She showed no sign of disappointment with her effort so far. After each frame, Twilight would proudly trot back to her seat, proclaiming that in the next frame that she would attain that elusive strike.
At least in her own way, she was having fun. Applejack was happy to be here, and she bowled adequately for a mare who at least once in a while took her family to Mr. Kingpin's bowling alley whenever they found that rare break in farm work, usually during the wintertime. It was a little hard to concentrate on the game, though, especially when the heavyset stallion at the other lane was yelling at another team to "mark it zero" for stepping over the line.
Then there was Pinkie Pie (who went under the moniker of Carly Clandestine), Rainbow Dash, and Rarity bowling at their own lane in paper-thin disguises. They tried to spy on the couple, but ended up challenging each other in a quick game that eventually resulted in them being thrown out. With Rainbow Dash chucking a ball into the ceiling and Pinkie Pie firing her ball with a cannon were good reasons. Rarity's excuse was that she was applying tubes of nail polish on the bowling balls without prior consent. Admittedly, the trio's stint in the bowling alley was an amusing sideshow, and that allowed Applejack and Twilight to enjoy the remainder of their bowling in relative peace, despite the heavyset stallion yelling at his skinnier teammate to shut up, but with a few more expletives.
When their session ended, the couple headed down a dirt path towards Fluttershy's cottage. Applejack had remembered accepting the yellow pegasus’s offer to prepare dinner for her and Twilight, and that their animal friends would serve as waiters and sing romantic background music. The farm pony felt a little uneasy about all this. One, the cottage was smack dab in the middle of the Everfree Forest. Two, the animals could not possibly put away all the stolen weapons they used to defend their forest homes.
"Applejack, where are you going?" Twilight asked.
"Into the Forest," said Applejack. "That's where Fluttershy lives, right?"
"You just walked past Fluttershy's cottage."
Applejack turned around and saw the idyllic tree house behind her. It appeared more homely than Twilight's library home, though a little squatter and with a lot more bird houses hanging off the branches. The cottage appeared peacefully idyllic than she expected. No wild trees surrounded it, and no weapons or power tools lay against the treehouse trunk. The animals that surrounded it waved happily at the pony couple and smiled at them.
Again, Applejack tried to ignore that distant crack in the skies.
The main interior of the cottage was as Applejack expected. Though decorated with lanterns of fireflies and lavender curtains, it still retained the homely natural feel. Off to the side, several colorful birds of various species lined up freestanding wooden perch singing while four weasels played the violins. In the center stood a round table topped with a checkerboard cloth and a burning candle. Complementary bread and salad as an appetizer had already been served. Once Twilight and Applejack took their seats, Fluttershy in a cute tuxedo and pink bowtie came from the kitchen and served up apple cider in wine glasses.
"Kinda nice that your critters are heckuva lot friendlier to ponies for a change," said Applejack.
"Whatever do you mean?" Fluttershy asked. "They've always been friendly."
"What Applejack is trying to say that they are much behaved after several of them attempted to raid the silos at her farm," said Twilight.
"I really do apologize for them. I know that I sometimes forget to leave food around, but even that is not enough for their tummies."
"Nopony is blaming you, Fluttershy. Like they say, critters will be critters."
"I will try to do better next time and leave more food out so that they won't steal from Applejack."
The yellow pegasus nearly lowered her head and ears and submissively, but she regained her confidence after Angel Bunny squeaked at her to buck up--at least that was what the tuxedo-wearing rabbit said. She excused herself back into the kitchen to prepare for the main course. Behind the curtain that separated the kitchen and the main room, Applejack could hear the voices of Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash, and Rarity arguing on what to put on the meal or what kind of dessert they should serve.
Once they finished their appetizer, Fluttershy, Angel Bunny, and a few other rabbits came back with the main course, except it was all in one plate. The couple had noticed that Fluttershy sweating nervously. It became obvious that she was lying that she was short on normal-sized plates and that she had to combine Twilight and Applejack's spaghetti dinner on one big plate. Somepony else put her up to it, and Applejack could see Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash, and Rarity anxiously peering out from behind the curtain before hiding back behind it when they were spotted. It did not help them that Applejack could see their silhouettes past the curtain.
The farm pony sighed earnestly, and accepted the dinner. Might as well oblige them and whatever they were planning. Applejack tried her hardest to ignore her friends as she started eating her half of the plate while Twilight started hers. It tasted quite good, especially the saucy veggie balls.
"It didn't work!" Rainbow Dash hissed from behind the curtain.
"I swear that was foolproof," Rarity whispered back. "Could they be too far from each other?"
"Oh, I was hoping that they would kiss just like that one movie," said Fluttershy. "Maybe we can try something else."
"Enough talk!" Pinkie cried. "Time for dessert!"
The curtain flapped as an all-too familiar pink pony in a tuxedo and a fake moustache rolled in on blue roller skates. She introduced herself as Madam Enigma, and served up a large sundae topped with sour gummi ropes and very long wafer rolls.
"I recommend for the lady and lady to sit close to each other, take a bite of either end of the ropes or the biscuits, and then look away as they chew their food," said Madam Enigma (Pinkie Pie). "The sundae tastes better that way. Madam Enigma, away!"
"Um," Twilight said as she watched Madam Enigma roll backward towards the curtain. "What was that about?"
"They want us to kiss by accident," said Applejack. "'Fraid that ain't gonna happen."
"You have to admit that scene in that movie was cute."
"I reckon so."
Against Madam Enigma's instructions and the expectations of their friends, Twilight and Applejack ate their dessert as normally as possible. The lack of romanticism elicited groans of disappointment from behind the curtain.
The couple ate their after dinner mints before they headed out from the cottage. Even as they walked down the dirt path, they could feel Rarity, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, and even Fluttershy watching them from behind the window, but were now unable to follow Applejack and Twilight. If they were to, Applejack would have, as politely as possible, turn them away towards their homes. The sun was setting, and she wanted to end the date with a perfect moment.
That moment led them at one of the tallest hills in Sweet Apple Acres. Both Twilight and Applejack made it in time and sat next to one another close to a lone apple tree. The sun dipped below the horizon forested by Applejack's many apple trees, and not too far rose the Mare in the Moon and her bright celestial domain.
"I had a lovely time," said Twilight. "Despite a few hiccups, of course."
"Yeah, sorry about that," said Applejack. "I didn't count on us overstaying at Rarity's and the Café being so busy."
"You don't have to apologize. It's these things that makes our date much more memorable. That is what tip number 513 recommended: 'always make the most of the unexpected'."
"You sure read through that book. Did it also recommend on what to do when we're alone?"
"I guess we could, um, kiss."
"Okay. Uh…"
"I was waiting for you to start."
"Sorry. It's my first time."
"Mine as well."
Nervousness made their cheeks blush and their hearts race. As the Mare in the Moon rose higher and higher, the unicorn and the earth pony glanced all around, occasionally looking at each other's eyes while twiddling their hooves. Then the pull of their love locked their sights upon each other. They touched hooves. They closed their eyes. And then leaned closer with erect lips. It was everything that Applejack could ask for.
Yet, it wasn't. Applejack gently pushed herself away from Twilight, and then lowered her Stetson over her eyes.
"What's wrong?" Twilight asked.
"This ain't right," said Applejack.
"Don't you love me, Applejack?"
"I do. I love you so much that I want so badly wanna do some perverted things to you that would be mighty disrespectful for you and ponies in general. I mean, this is everything I can ask for. My family's alive. I have my farm. There ain't no fascist government, no pollution, and no war. Pegasi, earth ponies, and unicorns are livin' together in harmony. This is such a dream come true Twi, but I have this strong feelin' that it ain't real. I want it to be, but I jus' can't accept it."
"You are right. 'Tis but a dream."
The distant cracking became thunderous. The land trembled. The trees turned black and began its slow disintegration. Stars flashed brightly before twinkling into oblivion. The Mare in the Moon reached its apex and shined brighter than ever. Beneath, a fissure appeared in the sky, and light poured from its narrow crack.
The Ideal Image of Twilight stood up to command an ethereal presence. The shadow she cast thanks to the Mare of the Moon grew bigger, and eventually it rose up from the ground to take the form of a numinous unicorn colossus made of stars and galaxies. The colossus uttered a loud whiny that shook the landscape. Slowly and surely, it trotted towards the fissure with an earth-shaking pace. When it reached its destination, it began ramming its horn against it repeatedly.
"We express our sincerest gratitude that thou hast discovered the falseness on your own," spoke the Ideal Image of Twilight. "If not for thou, we would hath been forever trapped in the most powerful of charm spells."
"Who are you?" asked Applejack. "Are you that damn bug queen?"
"We are not the aforementioned Changeling Queen, but We will reveal Our true identity in due time. The Dream Fissure widens before us, and all of reality shall be pouring back into thy mind. Once thou hast come to, thou must be prepared to fight against the perpetrator who trapped thou into this dream world."
The colossus of stars and galaxies made one last ram against the Fissure, and with one twist of the horn, the entire dream world shattered to reveal a realm of pure light. Only the apple tree, Applejack, and the Ideal Image of Twilight remained.
"The dream world hath been destroyed," said the Ideal Image of Twilight. "Awaken!"
Her eyes opened to the world of lime green liquid. For a moment, she gagged until she realized that she wasn't drowning.
How long was she out? A minute or an hour, anything was too long to be cooped in this slimy cocoon. Luckily that changeling she-beast wasn't close by. She stood across of whatever god-forsaken room she moved Applejack into, talking to another captured pony. As long as she was distracted with that poor soul…
No… Anypony but her. Of all the ponies she captured, it had to be her. Chrysalis stuck her against the wall with some strange green goo. She did not encase her, but she sensually stroked the purple unicorns chin while licking her own black lips.
Applejack's rising anger and her awakening surprised the Changeling Queen. Realizing Applejack's glare and her entrapment, Chrysalis laughed at her mockingly, and proceeded to sensually hold Twilight's head, rub her cheeks against her, and then lick them.
That's it. Applejack had it with the bug, and she punched and punched the cocoon wall with her might. Chrysalis's sensual mocking, or rather her continued assault on Twilight's sanctity only served to make Applejack pound harder. In all her arrogance, the Changeling Queen failed to realize the cracks appearing on the cocoon, and then it was too late. The drenched earth pony broke free, and the green fluids flooded out as Applejack stumbled towards Changeling Queen.
"Color me impressed," said Chrysalis. "Not only you broke through my strongest charm spell, but you also broke through my hardest cocoon. Alas, you cannot hope to win against me, silly Applejack. I sealed your Element of Truth and I sapped your strength. Now be a good little pony and--"
"SHUT UP!" Applejack screamed, and she leapt into the air with a hard head-butt against the Queen's abdomen. She knocked Chrysalis over, but then immediately rushed into her and punched her repeatedly.
"SHUT UP!" Applejack cried. "SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP!"
"I didn't even say anything," smiled Chrysalis, before Applejack punched her in the face again. The rawness of Applejack's rage made her beat the Changeling Queen all over her body. Bones were broken. Teeth flew out. Applejack even tore a wing off and parts of Chrysalis's mane before she bucked her across the room.
Yet the damned bitch kept getting back onto her hooves laughing harder and harder like a psychotic masochist. Impossible. Applejack could only feel utter hatred for the Changeling Queen. There was no love for her to drain out.
Then the rebel mare realized that Chrysalis fed off her hatred stemming from her love for Twilight. Chrysalis had known this all along, and already she began regenerating her amputated wing and and healing her broken bones.
"So you've noticed?" asked Chrysalis. "Forbidden love is juicy, but hatred stemming from that love is orgasmic! At your state, you can never defeat me."
"Don't listen to her!" Twilight cried. "I know you can beat her, Applejack! All you need to do is clear your emotions."
"Ooh, I felt that. Looks like her words perked you up."
"I told you to shut up," Applejack growled.
"Since I brought you two together, would you like me to tell her how you feel about her? Or shall I tell you how she really feels about you?"
"JUST SHUT-UP!"
Applejack charged in and tackled the Changeling Queen. She pummeled her repeatedly in the face and body before landing a blow that made her stop talking.