//------------------------------// // The War of Understanding (aka the Biggest Possibility Ever] // Story: The Songs of True Madness // by Kaffeina //------------------------------// THIS IS NOT APPLICABLE TO ANY STORIES INVOLVED UNLESS STATED OTHERWISE Rules: 1)Wait patiently for each writer to finish before adding in your section 2)Use the chatbox thing to discuss who writes when 3)Don’t type inane comments on the actual docx 5)Edit the story for posting on your account via copy-paste into a document of your own. Don’t do it here. 4)Inane or useful, comments should be written with the ‘comments’ button not on the actual docx 6)Have some mother [EXPLETIVE] fun with this. Because this [EXPLETIVE] is gonna be sweet. Note 3: Due to the clogging of the chat, Palringo is the new method of interpersonal communication. Once signed into Palringo, just join the group ‘the war of understanding’ Note 4: Battle music goes in the table below. Beyond The Bounds https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Niruwh4UwS8 Last One Standing https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uurkmfkKodg Beauty Of Annihilation https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LAUOpUsR7ME Confrontation with the Enemy http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=gQnY7L8ucCk D-Evil https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lZSni89NM5Y Whispers In The Dark http://youtu.be/omuYo49_SOQ  Nashandra Theme https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=efHjdSM3nHo  Time to Say Goodbye https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KdWCLT7kccY A Force is Coming https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TTRImQ9LT7Y Sons Of Odin https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QEt-aRGV5nA Fume Knight Theme https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ig0G32Ng2lM  Makuta theme https://soundcloud.com/serialsymphony/the-makuta Specter Knight Theme https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xe_XgkJ44_E Worlds Collide (fitting, I think) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RrqhZm3uZx0 Critical Mass https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yDsWPo4ONpo Titan Battle https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lO2b7Kgz9ao Kirby Theme https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3CS93CdMv_E  Seek n’ Destroy https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bG5wSvi7euI Rising https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RERXiliJfdI Note 5: Every character gets an intro scene where they build their own section of their team’s base in the same general area as the rest of the bases. Note 6: Apparently, Palringo keeps screwing some people over, so Skype is a better deal at this point Scene 1: Shadows Ignite Battle World 1; Umbra Shadow-Walker’s Private Universe “Chii~in pon pon pon~~ This thing on?” Umbra Shadow-Walker; Systems Administrator. The DJ (Would brutally murder Zero in less than half a second) Tapping the microphone in front of him and wincing at the generated feedback, Umbra continued, “I’ll… take that as a yes. In any case, welcome all to the one and only, War of Understanding!” Umbra smirked, “I’m your master of ceremonies, Umbra Shadow-Walker, and today looks like a lovely day to decide the fate of several Universes’ Displaced inhabitants. Weather today looks like it’ll hold at a nice seventy degrees Fahrenheit with an eighty percent chance of rain later on, but it should stay nice and sunny for most of the day anyways.” Taking a moment to make sure all of the cameras and interdimensional screens were in working order, Umbra sat back, continuing his narration, “Well, here we are on the main continent of my lovely little planet, on one of the biggest, emptiest, most desolate stretches of unbroken Badlands in this galaxy. All the contestants of this lovely little show should be appearing pretty soon, so I suppose we’ll just go to our sponsors until they arrive, ne?” Advertisment Somewhere due West of the Arena A portal into a darkened universe opened, and the sound of metal clanking on stone resonated through the universe. Red eyes burned as a metallic giant stepped through into the universe, servos whirring and clanking as he finally entered. Makuta Teridax; King of the Shadows, Massive (Literally) SOB The Villain (Would consume Zero with a shadow arm before he could do anything) Teridax surveyed the desert before him with a seemingly bored attitude. Appropriate, he mused, that the final battle would be here. Rahkshi; Makuta’s Sons, Evil Army The Badass Cannon Fodder (Zero’s screwed against these motherfuckers) Behind him, more and more portals opened. The clanking of thousands of metallic feet heralded the rest of his group. Rahkshi in their hundreds came through, the sun gleaming off their armoured carapaces. Teridax didn’t even move, but the clouds overhead gathered together, blocking out the sun’s rays. The area surrounding the Rahkshi darkened, shadows obscuring everything about them. Inside the patch of darkness he had created, Teridax got to work. Cracking the knuckles on hands big enough to palm watermelons, he replaced the bizarrely wide mask with a narrower one that resembled an insect. Holding cages were ferried through next, holding snarling, mutated creatures that barely resembled their original species. Teridax examined the proceedings with a sombre appearance. The ground tore itself apart, rocks levitating themselves into a crude bunker. Teridax paused, and looked amongst his children. On an unspoken command, they lined up, into orderly formations. And thus Teridax stood there for a long time, staring seemingly into nothing. What he was thinking, what he was planning, only he really knew. Finally, a last portal deposited a small, heart-shaped device with a clear quartz screen on the front. A small, barely visible green LED light was glowing, right on the bottom of the device. With a wave of his hand, it attached itself to his chest, right where his heart would be. He tapped it, and his eyes briefly glowed blue. Then, he turned, and sat down. Trees and plants grew around him, creating a small grove. This quickly grew into a forest, small and only a couple of seconds old but still impressive. Teridax continued to sit, before waving a hand. At this, all the screens briefly flashed red, before returning to normal. “Thank you for paying attention to this important broadcast,” Teridax began, the sarcasm dripping from his every word, “but I’m afraid that you’ll have to wait a while longer for everybody to show up. My allies are coming, I assure you. All we have to do is wait for Auric to come to this place.” And with that, Teridax went silent, not even bothering to say anything further. He went as still as a statue, only the occasional flash of blue in his eyes even indicating he was alive. Meanwhile, far away in the actual arena Umbra Shadow-Walker bolted upright. “Holy shit. He’s here.” He blinked twice before shooting out of the announcer’s booth and into the air. “HOLY SHIT! HE’S HERE! LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, PLEASE WELCOME THE INTRODUCTION OF OUR KING OF SHADOWS! OUR RULER OF THE BIONICLE! PRISONER 0 OF TARTARUS! THE ONE! THE ONLY! MAKUTA TERIDAX!!” As he settled back onto the ground below, Umbra walked towards Teridax’s position, a score of cameras and microphones trailing behind him. “This is great, everyone. This is really really great; Makuta Teridax being the first to get here means that I get to see the Villain Camp!” Flying through the Badlands, Umbra soon made landfall outside a strange, shadowy forest directly beneath a bank of ominous clouds. “I suppose I should filter the Villain arrivals over to this area, yeah? Yeah.” Snapping, Umbra concentrated for but a moment as data-filled screens appeared around his position. With a light grunt of annoyance, Umbra created a large, shimmering portal directly above the newly designated Villain’s Camp – now complete with a spooky, wrought iron fence and gate with a placard bearing “Villain Camp” on top. “Yeah, that looks good. Well, what are we waiting for? Let’s Go!” Scene 2: Aliens and a Lich Somewhere due East of the Arena, about as far away from it as the Villain Camp is A random portal opened up in the oppressively sunny badlands, spewing out one human before closing. Said human went by the name of Jason. He had an Omnitrix. Far away over the Villain’s Camp, the human’s two traveling companions were spewed out of the active portal over said camp. Jason Hughes; Omnitrix-Wielding Champion of the Norse Gods One Badass MotherF***er (Would probably stomp Zero with Way Big) “Umbra, you really need to work on your portal skills,” Jason grumbled as he got up, brushing his clothes off. With a screaming of wind and a massive shockwave, an object hurled its way through the atmosphere of the aptly named Battle World, and buried itself at Jason’s feet. Said object was a large, conical chunk of unidentifiable metal with a note etched in. Said note read: “Shit, sorry about that. Forgot to shield for Void turbulence. -Umbra” “Ok where are Zed and Xemnas?” he asked grabbing the object, dropping it in his hypercube. “‘Cause they were with me coming here,” he looked up at the sky, scowling alright fine don’t answer me,” he flipped off Umbra before moving off toward a clearing. “There you are,” Xemnas said, stepping out of a corridor of darkness, Zed at his heels. “We hit a little turbulence on the way here,” he explained, adjusting his coat. Xemnas; Lord of Nothingness Jason’s Buddy (Zero couldn’t do shit against this motherfucker) Zed; Hates Being Called Dog Jason’s Pet/ Companion (Hell, even the dog can kill Zero) “Umbra already told me,” Jason said, looking around. “Ok, looks like we’re the first ones here, so... I’ll set up camp,” he said before Xemnas stopped him. “Allow me,” the Nobody said before throwing his arms out, focusing his powers. Reality seemed to bend before snapping back into place in the form of a strange white castle. “Behold! The Castle That Never Was!” “Show off,” Jason mumbled, looking up at the castle, petting Zed’s head. Somewhere North of Teridax’s base; within walking distance Lich King; Commander of the Undead The Master of the Undead (Can kill Zero, even if he wouldn’t) Out from a portal steps a hulking figure of a man, a massive suit of armor covering him as frost radiates off his armor. His weapon, Frostmourne, is held tightly in his grip as more armored figures arrive behind him, flanked by unicorns in robes and wave after wave of undead. Among one of the figures to leave the portal is another human, clad in an peculiar purple suit with a mask and cape, he stands next to the Lich King. Zero; Lich King’s Brother The Master Strategist (Can’t kill anyone at all. Not even a minion.) Zero looks over to his brother, smirking under his mask. “Our forces amass to destroy the enemies of Teridax. The ghouls and Necromancers are already setting up our camp as we speak, corrupting the ground and harvesting resources. I suspect we will have our camp built within the hour.” The Lich King simply nods his head once. “Begin bringing through the dragons and minotaurs as soon as our base is complete. I want no interruptions as I call upon more undead.” As he walks away back towards the portal, directing the zombies and necromancers around, a few of the lesser armored figures approach Zero, bowing towards him. “We are yours to command my lord. We shall begin scouting operations immediately.” With a dull thump, a small chunk of metal lands before the two. On it is etched a message reading: “Dear Lich King and Zero, there is a massive plot of land filled with corpses exactly six meters left of your position. Use it as you will. -Umbra Shadow-Walker” Zero smirks as he reads the message, a mental message already going out to the Death Knights around him as a few of them go off, commanding their necromancers to begin gathering the corpses for the revival rituals. Scene 3: Nightmare DNA Somewhere South of Jason’s Base; within walking distance Jumping out of a white-bordered portal, a sixteen year-old human lands on the ground. Ben 10X; Omnitrix-Wielding Champion of the Greek Gods The Protector (Wouldn’t kill Zero, but Zero can’t do shit against him) “Woo! Holy crap, that worked!” He looks around, green jacket billowing slightly in the wind, scratching at his messy brown hair. “That was trippy, all the colors and lights, hoo.” He shakes his head slightly. “Alright,” he said, clapping his hands together, “Now where the hell am I...woah!” Ben looks up to see a massive castle not too far from him. “Whelp, when in doubt, head for the castle!” He races off for the castle, reaching it within seconds. Ben looks up, trying to see the very top of the castle. “Hmm...should I knock or just go in? Decisions, decisions. Ah to hell with it.” Ben takes in a big breath and calls upon a special gift from his younger sisters: The Royal Canterlot Voice. “HEY!!! ANYONE HOME?!” “That you, Ben?” Jason called out, peering out of one of the windows. “Jason? Hey! Haven’t seen you in a long time! Not since that whole thing with Tennyson! Whatcha been up to?!” “You know, cleaning up the Forever Knights, rebuilding the Bifrost, that whole chestnut. Now get up here already.” “Alright! I’m on my way up!” He looks down to the omnitrix and punches in his favored flyer. “Emerald Streak!” Ben shouts, now a green furred pegasus. He flies up and into the window Jason poked his head out of. “Yo! What’s happenin?!” he proclaims, transforming back into a human. “We were just setting up. You remember Xemnas and Zed?” Jason asked, his eyes flashing for a second before the empty room filled with furniture. “It’s good to see you again Ben,” Xemnas said, nodding his head in greeting. “Xem,” Ben nods. “So, nice digs. Didn’t know Auric had a castle, it’s nice.” “I just made it,” Xemnas explained, leaning against a wall. “Oh, well I like it.” Ben frowns for a second. “Well, apparently it’s too white for Superiority. Sorry, ever since I merged with Nexus, I have to listen to their constant prattling. It gets annoying very easily.” “That must suck,” Jason said, shaking his head a bit. “I’m still getting used to the Odin force.” “Odin force? Must be something special. Well, why don’t we catch up while the others show up, eh?” “Sounds good to me. How about we go hang out in the throne room?” Jason asked, walking out of the room, gesturing for them to follow. “Sure, let’s go!” Somewhere South of the Villain’s Base; within walking distance The ground seems to bubble as the atmosphere within a short distance seems to shift entirely. Sand kicks up and pops as red-tinted glass begins to form, slowly pushing out of the ground. As it reaches about three metres tall, it stops, features becoming clear and two handles forming in the middle. The large gate then sits there quietly for a few moments as the sand settles until it is kicked outward loudly, the glass doors catapulting off and shattering once they hit the ground. “I fucking hate doors.” Freddy; The Nightmare Bringer F***s S*** Up With No F***s Given Does Not Own a Pizza Joint. (The pizza joint could probably beat Zero, if it existed..) “Seriously, they are just stupid fucking hindrances.” Freddy stepped out onto the stand, one hand flexing his hand and clinking artificial claws while the other creaks and stretches, wood splintering slightly. His gaze lazily turns behind him, back into the gate. ”Hurry up then, we haven’t got all day… probably.” Out from the door comes a man, his face cloaked in darkness underneath the hood of his armor. His eyes glowed with power, showing little emotion. Dominus; Overlord of Equestria, The Dark One Cannon-Fodder Spawn Station (Zero is the only one who could die from this asshole. Seriously. Zero is almost entirely human) “Well, what do you think, Nightmare?” He muttered to himself. ’Rather bleak. Makes sense a war would happens here.’ The entity within his head echoed. ”Well if you two are done mentally fucking how about we get to the rest of the idiots?” Don jumped back a bit at Freddy’s intrusion but quickly recovered. “What about my minions?” Freddy groaned and splayed out his wooden hand toward the gate. It creaked slightly and the archway rushed backwards about five-hundred metres, forcing a large collection of minions into the desert before it fell over and broke. ”Better, Princess Fuck-In-Your-Head?” Don just shook his head in aggravation. “Can we just get moving? I’ve got a lot to set up and I’d rather get to messing with the heroes.” ”We can get going as soon as the Nightmare mentally cleans her muzzle.” A low grumble came from Don as he rose his fist covered in flames, aimed at Freddy’s face. Scene 4: Bugged by Ghosts Somewhere West of Jason’s Castle A nydus worm erupted out of the ground. Dahaka: Leader of the Swarm Cannon Fodder for the Heroes (Could probably take down Dominus and Zero. (Definitely Zero)) I was barfed out of the nydus worm, along with enough drones to cause a problem right off the bat.         ‘Where is everyone?’ I wondered. ‘First priority, find and build a base. Second priority, find allies.’ I began dropping structures right and left, in case I had been detected. This was a war, after all. I called a wave of Zerg out of the worm, just to prevent a zerg rush.         ‘We could probably still join Teridax.’ Said Prime Directive.         ‘Shut up.’ I replied. I sent a few zerglings scouting, hoping to find something. Just then, a big, metallic thing came whizzing out of the sky. It landed before any counter measures could be initiated. It did not damaging anything, but a hologram sprang out of it, saying, “Hey, Dahaka. There’s plenty of stuff for a base right where you are. Dig away the topsoil if you want to reach it. -Umbra” Dahaka looked up, and said,         “Thank you, Umbra!” Somewhere West of the Villain’s Base; within walking distance The wind began kick up as a purple vortex appeared. “Ya know, why couldn’t we have just been dropped in the camps?” Shade; The Ectonurite Mage, Hates Being Dropped in the Middle of Nowhere The Ghost (Could probably get Zero to kill himself, honestly) Shade shook his head as the purple vortex closed behind him. ’Why are these types of battles always held in badlands or forest clearings?’ “Welp, might as well take a look around.” Shade mused before floating upwards. As he got above the tree tops, Shade noticed the dark ominous clouds in the distance. “Seriously? That is really stereotypical. But I can live with it.” Shade chuckled maliciously before flying toward the camp. ’The forces of light will know true fear.’ Scene 5: Doomed Hearts Somewhere East of the Hero’s Base In the emptiness of the Badlands, the eruption of a massive portal was instantly noticeable. What was more noticeable was the figure flying out of said portal in a textbook-perfect flying-spin kick. While wreathed in flames. And bellowing a massive kiai at the same time. Domon Kasshu; The King of Hearts The Pilot (Would ERUPTING BURNING FINGER Zero out of existence) Domon cracked his neck, looking around the barren area. “This is the place? Really??” he asked, shaking his head. “Hey Umbra, or anyone else, hear me?” he called out looking around. Skreeeeeeeee A roll of metal slats bound together with rope slammed into the ground just in front of Domon, kicking up a massive cloud of dust and obscuring Domon’s view of the surrounding area. As the dust cleared, the roll unfurled with a sound of bells, projecting a hologram of Umbra into the air above it. “‘Sup Domon? How ya doing?” “Well enough I suppose,” he said looking at the hologram, “you do realize that I’m out of a Gundam right?” “Hmm. Well, that’s a problem. Easily remedied though. Watch.” And with a sound of roaring thunder, a blazing object burst into view, descending from the sky above as unto an angel from heaven. In other words, it came down like the asteroid that killed the dinosaurs. SLAM CRASH When the dust cleared, Domon found an amazing sight: the Burning Gundam standing proudly, it’s armor gleaming in the blazing noon-day sun. One could almost hear the brilliant ping! of sunlight reflecting off of its visor.  “Ha!” Domon said with a grin, “We’re back in business baby!” he shouted, moving over to the Gundam, getting inside the control area. The hologram followed, “You like it?” “Hell yes!” he said as he started to move it, “Lets get it on!” he shouted, running off into the woods. Back in the Arena – Interlude 1 Umbra stood in front of a solitary camera in his incredibly bishonen human form. With nothing but a towel around his waist. Clearing his throat, he began. “Hello viewers. Look at your LOHAV/H fic. Now back to mine. Now back to your fic. Now back to mine.” Smirking slightly, he continued. “Sadly, it isn’t mine. But if you stopped using poorly written prose and started crossing over with other writers, it could look like mine.” “Look down; what’s in your hand? Back to me; I have it! -VWORPLE- It’s the best gaming computer you nerds could ever buy!” “Look down. Back up. The Computer is now -VWORPLE- best pony! Anything is possible if you stop using terrible prose and start writing with other authors.” VWORPLE “I’m on a horse.” “Get off of me, Umbra!” “Hush, purple smart. I’m in charge now.” “WHY YOU LITTLE–” WE ARE EXPERIENCING TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES Back in Teridax’s Forest o’ Doom Teridax just stared at one of the screens dangling in front of him. He could count the number of competent allies he had on one hand. The Lich king, Dominus and Freddy were competent enough allies, but why, WHY was there a Lelouch? “Alright, alright. The situation is still salvageable.” The heart on his chest pulsed a bit, a bit more green light trickling into the device. He tapped it distractedly. “Need more time… need more time… need HIM to be here…” As it had with so many others, a whistling noise cut through Teridax’s own thoughts. Looking up in surprise, he noted a small object hurtling towards him at sub-orbital velocities. Catching it, he saw it was a Makuta Stone of all things. With a message engraved onto it, no less. Undoubtedly from Umbra. Teridax snorted at the stone’s appearance, reading the message to himself. “The irony of this message appearing in this way is not lost on me, Umbra.” “Good Day, sir. Welcome to Battle World 1. There is a network of tunnels underneath this absolutely lovely forest of yours. No one else knows of them. They lead nigh everywhere in this Badland, so use them as you will. Massive deposits of energized protodermis six feet behind you and six hundred feet straight down. Use that how you will. -Umbra” Teridax looked at the probe for a while, before nodding. Without even moving, he phased downwards, entering the tunnels. He appraised them, before grudgingly nodding his approval. “At least you are neutral in this conflict, Umbra. But I still need more time before this will work.” The heart-shaped device grew a little brighter, and he tapped it with a massive finger. “As soon as he appears, it won’t matter who wins or loses… I will always win.” With a smirk spelled out in his body language, he pulled out a crystal orb, and started tapping it, watching it zoom in on various places on the universe. “Well, now. This looks interesting…” Scene 6: First Contact First Contact: of Zerg and Undead (Zero wouldn’t survive ten seconds.) A zergling rushed along. It was confused by the fact that nine other zerglings were running besides it, but it welcomed the safety brought in numbers. They spotted a strange procession in the distance, where a small group of what appeared to be a mixture of all three pony races, along with a diamond dog. The diamond dog and most of the ponies were in horrible states of decay, wounds covering their bodies from head to hoof, except for two of the unicorns, who looked perfectly fine, except for the glossed over look in their eyes and the black robes adorning their backs. The zerglings wanted to kill them, but the master commanded them to watch them from a distance while he sent a nydus worm. One of the dead things seemed to see them, and began charging. The others looked around stupidly before charging with the first. The cultist looking pony’s galloped to keep up with them, certainly cursing. The master seemed distraught, but ordered them to defend themselves. – Umbra looked into one of his many view screens. “.... That was unexpected. Let’s begin the War!” Clicking a few buttons, he sat back and chuckled. “Let’s see how they like this…” – BWEEP! “BATTLE ONE! START!” Apparently so focused on the task of killing things, the zerglings rushed to the zombies. The zerglings jumped on the zombies, and began slicing and biting them. Two of the zombies, too stupid to notice the noise, suddenly started moving and attacking faster, as if in a frenzy. “FIRST BLOOD: ZERG! SCORE: 1:0! LET THERE BE BLOOD!” The zerglings, in true Zerg fashion, continued attacking wildly. But one of the zombies, the Diamond Dog, tore a zergling apart with its new found strength. “BRUTAL KILL! SCORE TIED! IT’S REALLY HEATING UP!” Two of the zerglings noticed that the cultist looking ponies weren’t being attacked viciously, and switched targets. The cultists, spotting the two zergling running at them, cast a curse on them; atrophying the two’s muscle. One of the undead unicorns impaled a zergling with it’s horn, spraying alien blood all over it’s undead corpse. “OOH THAT’S GOTTA STING! SCORE: 1:2; THE ZOMBIES ARE WINNING! TWO ZERG CRIPPLED! LET’S SEE HOW THIS PLAYS OUT!” The zerglings redoubled their efforts to kill the zombies and at about the same time, one of the earth pony undead bucked a zergling, sending the poor thing flying. “50 POINTS DAMAGE! THAT ZERG AIN’T GONNA SURVIVE MUCH LONGER! ACTIVATE BERSERKER’S LAST STAND – LOW HEALTH = MASSIVE ATTACK DAMAGE!” The berserk zergling charged back into the fray, leaping at the head of one of the zombies and tearing it off with a single stroke of its claw. But to offset this, one of the necromancers animated the skeleton of one of the zombies, allowing it to attack the berserking Zergling and deal those last few points of damage. “BERSERKER ZERGLING LOST! SCORE: 1: 3 THIS IS LOOKING REAL BAD FOR THE ZERG, FOLKS! BUT WHAT’S THIS!? HERE COMES THE CAVALRY! NYDUS WORM INBOUND! ETA: THREE SECONDS!” As one zergling goes down to a zombie and another gets stabbed by a cultist, the remaining zerglings get clear orders from the master. “ATTACK THE CULTIST LOOKING PONIES, YOU IDIOTS!” So, they rushed the indicated cultists. “BODY SLAM!” “NICE STAB!” “NUT SHOT!” “DECAPITATIOOOOOOOOOON!” “DOUBLE KILL!” “TRIPLE KILL!” “PENTA-KILL!” “M-M-M-MONSTER KILL!” “VICTORY: DAHAKA +50 EXP ITEM DROP: ZOMBIE FLESH (SHREDDED)16 BITSCULTIST CLOAKS (SHREDDED)RITUAL DAGGERS (2)SPOOKY SCARY SKELETON (SHATTERED) FIRST CONTACT BATTLE (UNOFFICIAL) COMPLETE. HAVE A NICE DAY.” As the Zerg overran the resistance, that message flashed by Dahaka’s eyes. He was surprised, but not as surprised as when the aforementioned objects seemed to be shoved into his unofficial pocket. He quickly opened his pocket, and the objects came spilling out. “What the... I don’t get it. How did that not puncture one of the inner membranes?” He got a headache from contemplating that delivery. But at least he knew how to deal with one of his enemy’s now. It was quite simple, really. Prime Directive had suggested it. Spam banelings. As It had said, “The enemy seems able to resurrect dead troops, so any dead on our side would result in the enemy growing. This would be countered by banelings, who don’t leave anything other than acid.” And thus, spam was made. Scene 7: OmniFear The Hero’s Castle Ben was sitting comfortable on one of the windowsills, looking out at the wasteland below. He could feel the light wind blowing on his face, causing him to smile despite the circumstances. Down below, he noticed something moving. “Huh, hey Jason! I think we got another one!” “Holy crap!” Jason shouted, peering out of the window. “It looks like Domon is here, and he got himself a new Gundam.” “Gundam? What the hell is a Gundam?” “A giant robot,” Jason explained. Vwwwwwm “Right you are, Jason m’boy. So, in the interest of being a good host, why not open the gates so your new guest may enter?” “I’m good up here, thanks,” said Ben. Jason turned to say something to Ben, only to find a cloud of dust settling where he once was sitting. He looked around a bit and noticed a small trail going up the ceiling. Looking up, Jason found Ben...clutching the chandelier? “Nah, I’m already here,” Domon said, jumping into the room from his Gundam’s hand. “Why is that guy holding a chandelier?” “I don’t like robots!” Ben shouted, not moving in the slightest. “Whatcha got against robots?” he asked, crossing his arms. “I’m Domon by the way.” “Name’s Ben and I don’t wanna talk about it! They’re evil! Let’s leave it at that!” “Ok...” Jason said, cutting in. “Hows about we head to the bar? Xemnas probably has it set up by now.” “I could go for a beer,” Ben said leaping off the chandelier, yet staying far away from the Gundam. “Been a while since I’ve had some of the good stuff. Just keep that...thing, away from me. Gives me the creeps just lookin’ at it.” “Yeah, yeah,” Domon said with a roll of his eyes, following Jason out of the room. “Oi! Wait for me!” Ben said as he ran after the two, catching up in a couple fast-steps. “Woo! Still love doin’ that. So, Domon, what the hell are you doing with...whatever the hell that thing is?” “I’m the King of Hearts, I use it to wreck fools in the Gundam Fight,” Domon started, filling their walk to the bar with a brief overview of his world’s history. Somewhere North of the Hero Castle. The Badlands were more active than they had been in the last seven billion years. Case in point: The rather ominous portal opening three feet above the ground, spewing out a creature from many peoples’ (and ponies’) worst nightmares. Pyramid Head; God of Fear, King of the Silent Hill Oh Goddamn Run For Your Damn Life! (Zero can just kill himself. I think it’s better that way) (Seriously Zero, do it.) “Hehehehe, look at these weaklings… Normally, I would kill you all on sight, but today is different due to… certain circumstances…” He took a deep whiff of the air and sighed loudly… before summoning his spear and stabbing a small lizard crawling on the ground. “And where are you going? I don’t recall the Badlands having life… Well, except for the changelings…” Whistling merrily to himself, he started walking. Where? He didn’t know, except maybe that big castle thing over there had an answer or two. “Wait… Why did… nah. Why do I get the sneaking suspicion that someone… WANTS TO SELL ME SOMETHING!” Quickly turning he saw… Nothing but a duck. “...What’s a duck doing in the middle of the Badlands of all places?” Then the duck did something odd: Point straight up with one wing and cock its head as if to say, “Well? What are you waiting for?” “...I’m suddenly scared for my life again… A feeling I haven’t felt in millennia.” Following the ducks wing up he found….. Was that a shine of metal? And then the whistling started. SKREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE SLAM! As the dust cleared away, Pyramid Head saw an odd sight: a shining, metallic, coffin-shaped object with a note attached. “Dear Pyramid Head: Welcome to Battle World 1. Encased in this lovely little package is a map to the Hero’s Castle (Directly South, if you want to do it the hard way) and one massively over-sized butcher’s knife, sharpened and ready to take souls. Additional features may be added later. Have fun! -Umbra Shadow-Walker (The guy who wants to sell you things.) (The guy who you absolutely, positively should NOT piss off. Ever)” “...I don’t know why, but I want to piss him off. Just to see what happens. Now what’s this Butcher’s Knife he’s… Ooooh that’s pretty…” A nice metallic knife, roughly the size of the original, was right there ready for the taking. He placed his hands around the hilt but… it didn’t feel right… No, it was like touching pond scum, all gooey… “What...WHAT IS THIS?!” He threw the knife with all of his power and made sure he could never see it again. Skreeeee Thud “Sorry, wrong knife. I have a whole lot of them, so it’s easy to lose track. This one should be better, though I should warn you….. it’s a bit temperamental. -Umbra” “You must understand, Umbra...I do not want your equipment, I do not need your help. I am fear incarnate, and terror given form! I am the eternal guardian of Silent Hill and Alessa, and I will be damned a thousand times over if I give in to the temptations of your… ‘Charity’.” He took the map, but left the second coffin, which slowly retreated. “And besides, I have my own. And it’s irreplaceable.” With that, he set out on the tedious task of getting to the Hero’s Castle… Directly South. “Hehehe, I love a good challenge…” Whoosh-thud “Well… if you insist. But realize this: These are all pre-written notes, so you’re really talking to no one. -Umbra” “I’m aware of that Umbra, but I know for a fact you can hear me.” He said, smug grin hidden behind his helmet. Whoosh “Shit! He’s onto me!” Scene 8: Musician’s Scourge   Somewhere East of the Hero Castle More portals had opened in the Badlands within the last three days than in the last seven billion years. Once more, another portal opened, this one reeking of chemicals and death; and strangely enough, it also carried with it the faint scent of courage and heroism. From it stepped a hulking figure, barely recognizable as having once been human. As it stepped forth into the barren wastelands of Battle World 1, it bellowed: “STAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRSSSS” Nemesis; The Unkillable Monster; The Slayer of Ellura The Hunter (Could probably kill Zero just by looking at him) “I was wondering when this damn thing was going to start. It took long enough.” Nemesis growled as he adjusted some of the weapons strapped to his back. “Now where the hell is everyone…?” He looked out over the seemingly barren wasteland for any sign of life, but some stray dirt blowing across the ground was his only company. “...this isn’t much of a war.” Skreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee- thud Yet another package from the resident SysAdmin. Another note as well. “Nemesis. Welcome to Battle World 1. Inside this package you will find all of your weapons. And I do mean all of them. And a map leading to the Hero’s Base in the West. Due East is the Arena, but as of right now, we’re still in setup. Be careful about making your way to the Hero Base though, that portal of yours dropped you directly in the middle of Laser-Wasp territory. So…… if you see giant, car-sized bugs popping out of random holes in either the giant rock columns or the ground….. either hit them before they fire or run. Don’t Die~ -Umbra” And as soon as Nemesis looked up, he heard the most ominous buzzing noise that anyone had ever heard. It was like the revving of a chainsaw mixed with the hum of a diesel engine at sixty miles per hour. VVVVVVVVVWWWWWWAWAAAAWWAAWAWAWAWWAWWARRRRRRRR Nemesis barely had time to retrieve his weapons before he was met with the sight of thousands of bloodthirsty insects streaking towards him. As he began to fire at them, explosions and gunfire streaking across the battlefield, he only had one thought on his mind. “Goddamnit Umbra!” In between the teams Essence; The Musician, The Merchant’s Demise, Madness of the Void True Neutral (Even she could probs kill Zero. Even if no one knows who she is) Essence dropped into the world out of nowhere, portal or otherwise. Dragging herself up she glared around the area. Summoning her favorite weapon, otherwise known as Poseidon’s Trident, she walked forward, looking around to try to spot someone nearby. While she did this one of the bugs, a giant wasp, flew up to her and aimed its stinger at her.         “I wouldn’t do that if I were you,” she warned. Seemingly debating it for a mere second the bug lunged forward. Out of instinct Essence dodged to the right and impaled the wasp on her weapon. She stood and stuck the weapon on her back. Walking forward she made her way away from both camps, her gait reflected her anger. Not only had she lost her friends, she had lost her home, and the only person she had saved was a small yellow pegasus and a blue alicorn. Her sorrow leaked out into her aura releasing her madness, her insanity, forth as trees bent forming a ladder up into a small fortress with a small pond in the center. Leaning forward she spoke,          “Umbra, I wish to speak with you.” Skreeeeeeeeeeeeeeee- whoooosh- thud “Alright. You’re not someone I’m exactly familiar with, but……. I do still know of you. Welcome to Battle World 1, Essence. How do you like my incredibly accurate, pre-written, dropped-from-orbit notes?” “They’re fine. I suppose you know me from one of the SysAdmins? If it’s the Merchant I have a message.” Skreeeeee “I know of you from sources that are best left unmentioned. The Merchant, eh? If it’s a death threat or anything similar, get in line. Wily bastard’s been evading his rightful kick in the balls for over seventeen eons. -Umbra” “I already knew that. My message, if you can get it to him is this: The demise of the Council of Influence was not appropriate, as the final member, even though I no longer hold shadow abilities, I relay that his rival still lives. He may have destroyed my world, my friends, my home but in the End, the battle between Desire and Madness will leave Madness above Desire. You think there may be a way to get that to him?” she asked. Her tail, fluffy and huggable, wiggled slightly out of excitement. Her ears flicked. She seemed to be anxious but extremely pissed at the same time. Who wouldn’t; being trapped in your world, your cry for help missed by others, as it broke apart into nothing? Skreeeee “Yeah. He’ll get that message real soon” “Alright.” Skreeeeee “If you want to fight someone, then I suggest heading South in a few days’ time. There’s an Arena there” “I’m not here to join the battle, in fact, I got here by accident. Watching may be fun though…” Skreeeeee- paff “Then here’s a ticket for Seat A-32. One of the better seats in the house, if I do say so myself. Concessions are free, just make sure to throw away all of your trash when you’re done. Oh, and don’t take the cups. Bottles are fine, but not the cups. Those are refillable.” “Alright, if anyone issues a challenge towards me- there’s always one- I’m open to it, but I will not be placed on one side. I already know who wins after all.”  Looking into the pool she could see her lost friends, the two she had saved, and sighed.  Looking up and realizing that her new camp had no name, she focused and a giant neon sign appeared above it with the words, “Music and Madness Station, grab an instrument!” She groaned and added another one, “Neutral Territory.” Scene 9: 9000 Degrees Above Zero In the air, in the dead center of the arena         A single, small, red-and-white sphere floats in the air. The button on the front clicks, and the entire thing hinges open, and spits forth a white energy. The alabaster mass swirls and writhes before becoming a single entity. Wings, a tail, and a long neck forms, and then, it becomes a figure. Geo the Charizard; The Reaper of Flame, The Gaelic Serpent, The Italian Inferno The Dragon (Would burn Zero alive. Then say mean things in Italian at him.)         “Where’s the fight? Where’s my ene- merda. WAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHH!” As Geo begins falling, he opens up his wings, and narrowly pulls up, before swooping around and landing on the ground. “Damnit, who put me up there? When I get my claws on the stronzo who did…” Skreeeeeeeeeeeeeee- SLAM Oddly enough, this message came not with a package, but with a large figurine of a Dragonite with a pouch looped around its neck. Said figurine promptly animated and held out a strange looking metallic card which immediately projected a small hologram. Vwwm “Greetings Geo! You’re a bit off. Your Base is directly to the West from here, and the fighting won’t start for a while. I suggest you get settled in. And if you didn’t get it, this statue of a Dragonite is a reference to one of the best Pokemon movies of all time. -Umbra Shadow-Walker (Piss me off and you’ll find out what solar plasma tastes like)” “... Dude, I’ve spent my entire childhood on Pokémon. Do you think I won’t get that reference? And whaddya mean, ‘piss you off’? What’d I do to you? Did I punch one of your friends? Sorry, I tend to lose track.” Vwwm “Nothing of the sort. It’s just a precautionary measure against those whose personalities I don’t know. And against those who tend to have more testosterone than reason.”         “... What? I just like punching things. And assholes. But mostly assholes. Are there any really big assholes that are gonna be here?” Vwwm “Would you like that list in alphabetical order or by which one’s closer to you?”         “I… wait, seriously? You’re not gonna tell me to piss off?” Vwwm “Nope. I wanna see quite a few people here get smacked around a bit. It would be good for them to learn a little humility. Actually, to help enforce it, I have an idea. Here…” Skreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee         A capsule falls from the sky next to the original, and within it, is…         “A baguette?” “I always wanted to see someone get beaten with a loaf of  bread.”         “... You are my new best friend.” Geo grabs the baguette, and as he begins to fly off, he stops, “Uhm… got a compass?” Skreeeeee-clack         Geo grabs the small machine, and after gaining orientation, “Fly!” After flying for a while, he notices a rather spooky looking forest, along with the sign ‘Villain Camp’ on it. “Why’re WE being called the villains…?” The Villain’s Base; the entirety now surrounded by a large, spooky, wrought-iron fence. With a crappy wooden sign outside the front gate. Don stood before the spawning pools his minions had built within the past hour. Magic flowed from his hands into a set of crystals, lacing the entire area in a dark glow. Minions of all kinds pulled themselves from the muck, quickly running off to serve their master’s will. SKREEEEEEEEEE–KER SLAM! Crunch-splatter This time, it wasn’t a package. No, this was a massive Shipping Crate (Size XXL) of an obviously futuristic shape. Inside it, yet another note. And an armory. And a peculiar device full of buttons and dials with a rather prominent antenna. “Greetings Don. Sorry about the minion. This armory is yours to do with as you wish. It never runs out and each weapon is more than capable of dealing some serious damage. Be careful, each weapon has its own set of effects and features, all listed in the roster by the door. Oh, and use the device to summon in aid should you need it. Ah; not right now though. It’ll only start working once the War starts nice and proper. -Umbra” “I knew Umbra would kill something sooner or later with one of those things." Said a voice from behind Don. He turned his head just enough to see whoever had arrived. Standing there, flanked by a few heavily armored figures, was a man clad in a purple suit and cape, a mask adorning his face as he spoke again. "I assume you are one of my allies? My name is Zero, pleasure to meet you." Zero puts out his hand towards Don for a handshake. Don dropped his hands and turned to face Zero, staring at him for a second before grasping his outstretched hand. “Dominus, though I think that’s a mouthful so I go by Don.” Skreeeeee-Crunch-EEK “My bad. Sorry. Zero: Press the object in here to your mask if you desire a laser eye for Geass Sniping. As in Geass people from afar. Comes with telescopic vision and an actual laser beam for attack purposes. It’s the purple marble thing. The rest is for your zombies. Armor and such. –Umbra (Don’t you just love how I do these things?)” Don shook his head before chuckling a bit. “I must admit I enjoy the presents. Now if only his aim was better.” Skreeee-paff “I can’t really direct these things too well after they enter the Atmosphere. Sorry.” Zero chuckles and reaches into the box, pulling out the purple ball and pressing it to his mask. "It must be Christmas, gifts are just raining from the sky." Laser Eye Mark IV installed. Would you like a tutorial? Zero chuckled lightly before nodding his head. Tutorial begin. You may feel some pain. "I'm already dead. Pain doesn't matter." Zero said as if to himself. He would come to regret those words deeply. Scene 10: Gravity Warps Time South of the Villain Camp, approx eighteen miles out A rippling, shuddering portal tore it’s way into existence with a howl of multicolored Void turbulence. Out launched a seemingly young woman who could’ve sworn that she was traveling with another person half a second ago. In an upward parabolic arc. At mach three. Directly North. Umbra calculated that she’d smash face first into Zero’s crotch within the next three minutes, if everything went smoothly. If not, then Zero learning what Marshmallow Hell feels like is also a suitable result. Kat Shifter; The Gravity Queen, General of Equestria, Goddess of Battle The Fighter (Well, it was nice knowing Zero while he was alive. Not.) As she involuntarily flew through the atmosphere of Battle World 1, Kat noticed a dark, spooky forest directly below her. Unfortunately, her current trajectory carried her far beyond said forest and directly into the meeting of two beings who were decidedly not her allies. In the case of one, the into applies more literally. Back with Zero and Don Don had begun looking over the list of equipment sent with the armory when he heard the sound of a large, organic object flying through the air. It sounded a lot like any other object flying really, except there was a bit more screaming factoring into the dopplering sound. “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH SHIT!” At the sound of screaming, Zero took a step to the side and back as the Death Knights with him formed a wall of metal armor and swords between him and the flying object. Not that it helped much. Kat instinctively used her gravity abilities to increase her mass enough to plow through whatever objects in her way. Which she did. Straight into Zero. Who thankfully survived the initial blow. “Ow, what the hell did I just hit and where is Umbra so I can hit him?” she groaned, sitting up on top of Zero. Skreeeee-slam-crunch “Dammit! Not another one! Don! Put your minions away! Kat, sorry about the turbulence. I’m in the Hero’s Castle some……. fifty-ish miles East of here. Sorry. -Umbra” Zero simply looked up at her, groaning slightly as he responds "Not that I mind you on top of me, but if you don't move, I'll file sexual harassment charges." Kat looked down, her face blank. She got off and stared down at the… thing below her. She lifted her hand and forced about thirty orgasms (G’s) onto him, pressing him further into the ground Taking a glance at the knights now strewn about the place, Don walked over to the once human projectile. “Would you calm down woman? The war hasn’t even started and you already have rekt (wounded) one of the participants.” Kat looked over at him, not very amused. “Sorry, but I don’t take to kindly to comments like those. Now, if you will excuse me, I have places to be, people to see and plans to crush the both of you,” she said pointing a finger at the two of them, “to make. Off I’ll be.” Kat began to take to the air, but stopped for a quick second. “You know, you chose the wrong side. You’ll all be destroyed in the end for joining him.” Don laughed before looking up at the girl. “Are you saying you wouldn’t try to fuck (destroy) us anyway? I’m sure a hero like you could find some way of justifying ending our lives.” Kat flew right up to his face, a snarl ever present. “Now you listen here, I don’t give a damn what you do on your Equestria. I rightly couldn’t care less, but when you help a ‘man’ who threatens not just his own, but every world in existence, that’s when I get mad.” She then gravity kicked Don right toward a nearby rock only for him to be caught by shadows springing up from the ground. “That’s your one and only warning, leave this war and go back to destroying your own worlds. Or you will be destroyed here.” Zero simply chuckled and responds with "Wow, quite the temper on you. Though you might find us much harder to kill then you think." Kat returned her attention to Zero, laying in the crater. “Yes, I am angry. You threaten my Flutters and I rip off your head. Simple as that. Now, see you on the battlefield, boys, or so you fear.” Kat flew high up from them and shot off in the direction of the Hero Castle. "I can already think of a few ways to knock her down a few notches....(Mostly with a few rounds of angry sex)" Zero mumbles to himself as he sits up. “So can I,” Don spoke as he walked back from where he had been sent flying “Though just from that alone I can tell this is going to be quite an interesting war.” Somewhere West of the Arena, closer to the Arena than any of the Bases. Right outside the entrance known as 2-B, a portal materialized as it had with so many others. This one was, unlike some, stable; ejaculating(ejected) only one being: A man with a pocket watch. Michael Faraday; Lord of Time Mr. Shitpunk Mc’Asshole (Would go into bullet time, and kick Zero’s kidneys into his mouth.) “Um… hello?” Michael took a look around, noticing the beef taco (barren room). “Is there someone out there?” Skreeeeeee Okay, seriously, what’s with all the packages? This is like the eleventh one! And, of course. Another note. “Hello Michael. Welcome to Battle World 1. Teridax’s base is to the West from here. There’s a compass in the box. The Hero’s Castle is to the East, though I don’t recommend going there. Some of the heroes can ignore your abilities. Also, I can too. And I’m there. The bowtie with the crystal? Well, more info on that when you actually put it on. It’ll be good for you. Good luck~ –Umbra (Don’t mess with me. Seriously. Don’t)” “So, rule one: the Doctor lies.” ‘Shut the fuck up, you jackass,’ Michael said from inside my mind, ‘before I come out and smack you in the face.’ “Rule two: Don’t screw with this… Umbra chap.” ‘I think we got that from the note, why are you saying it out loud?’ “Rule three: Bowties are cool.” ‘Quit it with the Doctor Who crap! You know that-’ It was at this point that Michael pulled the bowtie out of the box-removing the tie he currently had on-and slung the new neck wear around his collar, tying it quickly with skilled hands. A moment passed, both halves slightly confused at how the bowtie was supposed to help either of them. And then the most curious feeling happened. VWORPLE The Michael felt himself being torn out of Nicholas’ psyche and stuffed into the red half of the jewel on the bowtie, his form compressing into a ball of malevolently red energy that flung itself into the distance towards the Villain Camp. Nicholas Faraday; The Other Lord of Time NOT Mr. Shitpunk Mc’Asshole (Could also kick Zero’s kidneys into his mouth.) Nicholas, who was now the sole owner of his body, suddenly noted the presence of slightly more green in his attire, along with the gear shaped jewel on his bowtie suddenly becoming a whole emerald, instead of sharing its space with a ruby. Skreeeeee-paff “I apologize for the inconvenience, but now you’ve got complete control of your own body. Of course, to prevent the deaths of everyone on this planet, Michael has incredibly reduced abilities until the war properly begins. The Hero base is directly East from here, just follow the map in the envelope. Also, once the war starts, both of you can only use your full abilities in the Arena. So I don’t have to mop up more blood than I already have. Good luck~ –Umbra” ‘What is it with Umbra and luck?’ Nicholas thought to Mic- oh wait… he then remembered exactly what had just happened and the implications hit him like a freight train. “We’re all gonna die.” At Neutral Territory Essence looked into the pond and groaned. Why? Nothing much. Just that her friends she saved from the demise of her home aren’t in this universe. Otherwise, she’s fine. Opening the door to the wooden fortress and walking down the steps, she stretched. All the crouching had made her body stressed. Pop “Sorry to give you such short notice, but…. INCOMING! -Umbra (Also, could you charge admission at the Arena when the War starts?) “Sure, I guess and wait what-” she was smooshed by someone. “OOMPH!” Ansem; Seeker of Darkness One Heartless Motherfucker (Night, night Zero.) Essence, now partially smooshed into the ground, could hear Ansem above her conversing. “I half expected to be alone,” Ansem said, raising his hand. Several pools of darkness formed around him, spawning a few Neo Shadows. “Go, find Teridax,” he ordered, sending the Heartless scurrying off.  He looked down at his feet, noticing he had landed on something. “Hmm...whats this?” “More like someone, buddy,” came a muffled voice. All that could be seen was an adorably fluffy tail. “I’m amazed you are alive,” Ansem said, looking at the tail with some amusement. “I survived the end of my world, and well, come from a council of... immortals? either way. I think I’m good. Now, could you, or whoever is sitting on me, please move? It’s uncomfortable,” her muffled voice responded. “Nothing is over you,” Ansem said, tilting his head to the side. “Then can you pull me out of the ground? I think your weird force or whatever smooshed me into it.” “Why would I do that?” “Cookies?” “I don’t eat,” Ansem replied boredly.  “I hate you. UMBRA! Get me out of the dirt please.” VWORPLE “Better?” “Thank you. Now,” she brushed the dirt out of her tail and off her ears. “Tea?” VWORPLE “Gah! Shit!” Umbra fell to the ground, reeking of alcohol and poor decisions. And horrendously butchered English. “Bah. wehre teh fcku am I?” Drunkenly looking around, Umbra spotted  Ansem and Essence standing a few feet away, all staring at him. “Teh fcuk uyo tanw!?” Suddenly a woman in her late fifties comes out of nowhere, grabs Umbra by the ear, and drags him away from the three. “Mom! I was playing with my friends!! Why do you have to ruin everything?!” Groaning, Essence shook her head, “Umbra, sheesh. Anyway. Somewhere in that direction is the Villain Camp. The opposite direction is the Hero’s Castle. Neutral Territory is manned by yours truly,” as she spoke her tail flicked in the directions she mentioned. VWORPLE “I’d like you all to ignore what just happened. That was not my mother. That was me creating constructs while pretending to be drunk and being drugged up for real. I apologize for the disturbance.” VWORPLE “Why do I doubt that?” she turned back to Ansem, “Feel free to roam. I recommend you stay away from the opposite side.” She turned around, making her way towards her base as Ansem looked at her. Ansem sighed  and headed Villain camps. In the Void, Near Umbra’s Private Universe… The dark figure, cloaked in reds so dark they were near black, watched his workings ensue. Not only had he created mass chaos but he had done it so deliciously! The Merchant; Major Dick, The Scumsucking Bitchsack That’s Been Fucking With Other Universes Like a Pile of Shit, Umbra’s Number One Mark on His Shit List, Desire, Essence’s Rival, Destined to Get Kicked In The Balls Hard Enough To Make A Big Bang Three Times Over, Has Horrible Interest Rates, Five Hundred And Sixth on the List of ‘Best Merchants in the Void’ out of Five Hundred And Seven (Umbra is Number Seven), Real Name is Lucy, Freaking Long Ass Title List The Meddling Asshole (Zero wants to kick him in the nuts like the pussy ass bitch he is, but would still probably die) Snickering, he watched the events slowly unfold until something made him destroy his popcorn. Shame, really; the popcorn didn’t do anything. In fact, it was delicious. The said event, the arrival of The Musician, made him realize that for one, his rival wasn’t dead; and two, his plan to destroy that world either failed or messed up as usual.  Fuming, he stood up and called for The Reaper, a personal friend and ally of his who has major issues when dealing with living people, angry that he never told him of her continued existence. The sub-deity popped in directly behind him. Screaming like a girl, then regaining his composure, The Merchant spoke up, “You never told me SHE still lived.” The Reaper; The Gate Holder, The Merchant’s Reluctant Only Friend, Not Really an Asshole, Grim, Wants to be a Farmer, Terrible With Plants The Bored One (Could kill Zero but would turn him into a plant instead) The Reaper shook his head, “Damn stereotypes. I am not Death related.” The Merchant glared at him, “Incompetent fool.” Reaper rolled his eyes. ‘Look at yourself.’ His demeanor spoke for itself. The man’s shoulders slumped slightly and he looked exhausted. Speaking up again, “I suppose you want something to be done?” “Yes!” The Merchant said quickly. Sighing, The Reaper dropped something out of a bag and into Umbra’s Private Universe. The objects hurtled downwards towards the Neutral Territory where The Musician sat drinking some tea. Aside from a thud, The Musician heard nothing. The Merchant looked positively ecstatic. This would show her not to mess with him. Although, he still remembered the time she had forced him to eat his own underpants in a bet –he may have been tasting literal shit for a week– and could guess she might get out of it. “OI! NARRATOR! WHAT THE HELL IS THIS DOUCHEBAG DOING OUTSIDE ME PRIVATE UNIVERSE? Oh hi, Reaper, what are you doing here?” Reaper spoke up, “Nothing much. Just helping Lucy with his plots,”  Reaper smirked at his pun. The Merchant just so happens to have some… clop in his pocket, I might add. “WAIT WHAT. NARRATOR, TMI. T. M. I.” Umbra’s left pocket bulged and images of anime girls, and disturbingly, Essence, shot out of his pocket. “... JSYRIN HELP ME KICK THIS OTHER NARRATOR’S ASS.” ^WISH GRANTED, MOTHERFUCKERS^ (Furious combat erupts between the two Narrators) (..... Hi. I’m The Backup Narrator) “‘SUP?” (As the fourth wall breaking and Narrator combat reached its deadly crescendo, I, the Backup Narrator, stealthily took over their position and brought the story from “Holy Shit What” to “Normal Chaos”. You’re welcome, dear reader.) The Reaper turned about and left The Merchant at his viewing deck. Umbra’s Pimped Out Announcer/ DJ Booth (It’s got a fucking mini-fridge! Holy shit!) Umbra stepped away from the microphone he had been using to yell at the Narrators. Sighing, he collapsed into his swivelling, ultra-comfortable, reclining futon/chair. “God DAMN! I don’t even…. fuck if I…… fuck fuckity fuck fuck fucking fucker fuck fuckshit fuckhole FUCKING FUCKSLUT MOTHER FUCKING WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FUCKING FUCKSHIT BULLSHIT WHAT THE FUCKING FUCKITY FUCK FUCK FUCK FUUUUUUUUUUUCK!” And promptly flipped the fuck out. “[Entire sentence deleted due to extreme expletive levels. Suffice to say, it lasted half an hour and went through every swear word in every language in the Multiverse. Without a single repeat.]” Finally spent, Umbra collapsed even further into his chair and contemplated his next move for the next few seconds. “I wonder what Reaper dropped….” <*pokes in* Might wanna investigate, hm?> “Quiet, you. I want the other Narrator.” (Me?) “Yes” Leaping from his chair in an impressive display of aerial acrobatics, Umbra performed a few more moves and promptly disappeared in his trademarked flash of color and VWORPLE Miles away in Neutral Territory, Umbra appeared, not in his normal manner, but in a slight shifting of the shadows, stepping out of an unnoticed bit of darkness below a tree root. “Blegh, what’s in those roots? Magic like that, makes me wanna be human again so I don’t have to taste it with my fucking brain.” Nearby Essence was looking at a weird looking box. The box wobbled and opened, a small plant creature crawling out. On it’s back there was note saying, Sorry.  Essence raised an eyebrow. Why would they- She was cut off as the little plant creature turned into a five-story tall killer plant beast. Umbra noticed this as well, mostly from the strange feel of the magic in the area. “Aww, it’s adorable how they thought that could kill anyone in the War. Hell, even Zero could take it out with his new laser eye.” As if on cue, a laser hit the beast which grunted and turned around. “Wait, that isn’t Zero’s magic signature. What. Who else has a magic signature matching laser eyes!?” Essence shrugged. “Dunno. Want me to take it out?” “Um… Sure?” Essence jumped sky high as the beast’s arm arced towards her. Spinning, she kicked it in the face and dropped down only to land on the creature's out-stretched leg. The beast tried to kick her into the air but she sneezed directly into the monster’s face, stunning it.  Then she did something unexpected. She spat on it, and off it went. Soaring into the sky faster than the speed of sound before it exploded. She landed gracefully on the ground. “......Well then. That’s that. Laters!” VWORPLE “Um…” VWORPLE “Almost forgot, here’s your uniform for later. Well, actually, you just need the hat and nametag. So, yeah. Nice digs ya got here. Very nature-y. Welp, laters!” Tossing said hat and nametag at Essence, Umbra left again in another VWORPLE In the skies over the Villain’s Camp ‘Twas not all that uncommon to see random objects flying around in Battle World 1’s atmosphere, but an orb of malignant, red energy was usually unseen. Unless the laser wasps were firing plasma bolts again. Then they were distressingly common. This orb, however, encased the body of one Michael Faraday, currently with reduced powers, much more red in his outfit, and greatly reduced powers, on top of the previous power reduction. Oh, and a snazzy, gold bowtie with a gear-shaped ruby imbedded into the center. ‘The hell happened? One second he puts on that tie, the next I feel like I’m being ripped out of my own head! Well, technically it was Nick’s head, but that’s against the point!’ As Michael flew over the camp for Villains, he noticed something strange. He decided, on a whim, to investigate this anomaly. ‘Nick, you there?’ he called into the recesses of his mind. ‘What is this? Am I finally free of him? But, wait. If he’s gone, does that mean he’s gone forever? I know I always told him I wanted him gone, but now that he really is....’ In his contemplation, Michael was oblivious to the quickly approaching missile. When he did finally notice it, it was far too late. “Shit!” he had time to shout out before they collided. – “......Ouch. That’s gotta sting.” “Hey wait a minute, why is the camera over here!? Focus on Kat and Mikey, asshat!” – “Ow,” Kat groaned as she sat up on the bumpy ‘ground.’ “Damn it. Umbra and his messed up teleportation. Still too groggy to fly. Well, at least the ground is somewhat soft.” “Yeah, I wonder why,” she heard from under her. Kat glanced down to see that the ‘ground’ she was sitting on, was in fact a young man. “Oh!” She levitated off of him, floating just above. “Oh, sorry about that. Here, let me help.” She put out a hand, indicating for him to take it. He looked up at her, not being able to do so before with her sitting on him, and seemed to freeze for a moment. After said moment passed, he happily took her hand and allowed her to hoist him up, which was deftly easy for the Gravity Shifter. “Thanks,” he commented once he was standing again and had dusted off his coat and vest. “No problem,” Kat said with a smile. However, then she got a good look at him and a small blush started to appear on her face. Oh my god!, she thought to herself as she looked him over again. He is hot! Okay, Kat, don’t mess this up. Introductions are everything. She straightened her hair a little as she settled back down on the ground. “So...um, sorry about ramming into you.” Stupid, stupid, stupid! “Uh, my name is Kat. It’s nice to meet you.” He seemed taken aback by her sudden apology. “No, it was I who hit you. They say distracted driving is the biggest killer of teens, but distracted flying seems just as dangerous,” he joked, laughing a little as he scratched the back of his head with one gloved hand. “Anyway, the name’s Michael Faraday.” Michael reached his other hand out for a handshake. Kat grasped his hand in a firm shake...perhaps too firm as he winced in pain a moment later. “Oh, sorry! Sorry, I’m still getting used to my new strength.” “It’s not a problem,” he said as he moved her hand to his face, kissing the innermost knuckles. Kat blushed even more, letting out a tiny giggle. “Oh, a gentleman. Not many of those around here.” “We’re an endangered species in any dimension, it seems.” He stood up straight again, looking her in the eye with a face that just screamed ‘I’m a Sexy Englishman’. Kat shied away slightly, but stood tall nonetheless.  “Oh quite,” she replied, putting on her faux English accent. “‘Tis quite a treat to meet one of your caliber, Mr. Faraday. Pray tell, what brings you to this field of battle?” “Why, the prospect of earning honor for the Faraday name, of course!” He looked up and off to the side, striking a dramatic pose, before eyeing her from the corner of his eye and smirking. “And the beautiful scenery, might I say.” Kat looked around them, looking confused. All around them was a wasteland, practically devoid of anything but rocks. “What scenery? Just a bunch of rocks and dust.” “Why, the scenery that stands before me.” He made it slightly more obvious that he was staring at her. It took her a few moments before it finally clicked as to what he meant. This realization sparked Kat’s blush to an even deeper red than before. “Um...I...um...oh…” Don’t faint, don’t faint, don’t faint. Whatever you do: don’t faint! Kat shyly looked back at him, noticing his pearly white smile. Oh, why does he have to be so hot? Kat tried to straighten herself, failing miserably. “I...um...I’m Kat Shifter, the Gravity Queen. A pleasure to make your acquaintance Mr. Faraday.” “Royalty?” he asked, seemingly genuine surprise painted his face. “I apologize, your highness; if I had known, I would have brought gifts!” He looked around for a moment, patting himself where his pockets were sewn in. “Wait, I may have just the thing.” He reached into his coat pocket and pulled out a thin, red rose. Upon closer inspection, the rose seemed to be made of some type of metal and painted over with acrylic paint. “For you,” he held the flower out delicately. Kat took the flower and sniffed it gently. “It’s lovely. Thank you. So tell me, Michael, why are you here? This war isn’t for the faint of heart, after all,” she asked as she started to stroll around him. Partially for intimidation, while the other part was just to get a three-sixty view. “While you are truly handsome, you do not seem like one for battle. It would be unwise to stay here.” “Well, if you must know, I am a contestant for this war. And, if I do say so myself, I believe I am the most powerful.” His smirk only grew in mirth as he said this, merely turning his head to watch her circle him. “And why are you here, Mrs. Shifter? One with such beauty as you should never have to face battle in the most general of terms!” She smiled slightly, but for some reason her shyness had disappeared. “The strongest hmm? Well, now that I doubt, but you’re free to think as such. And that’s Ms. Shifter to you. I’m not married. Why am I here, you ask? Well, I’m here to help lead.” At this, Michael seemed genuinely curious. “Lead what, exactly?” One of his eyebrows raised, showing his interest. “To lead Auric to victory. I am many things, Mr. Faraday, but one of the greatest aspects of myself is that I am a general. General Shifter: ruthless, cunning, even divine, some said. Conqueror of the Dragon Empire, victor over the griffin armies, and massacrer of the changeling race. That is who I am.” During Kat’s monologue, Michael had become eerily silent. When she glanced over to the man, she saw a dark look on his face. “You say you’re here to lead Auric’s forces?” he asked, not moving in the slightest. Kat stopped her walking right in front of him, her own face matching his expression. “Let me guess, you’re working for Teridax, aren’t you?” “I apologize dearly, Ms. Shifter, but I must be going. Murder before the war even begins would be highly unsportsmanlike of me, now wouldn’t it?” The man turned away from her, waiting for her response as he prepared his watch. Kat simply watched as he waited silently. “You control time,” she said suddenly, making Michael freeze. “Don’t you?” “What makes you say that, my dear?” There was something in his voice that indicated… something akin to an emotion much like fear. “You feel like him.” Kat turned slightly, looking off into the distance. “Your aura, your presence. It’s almost as if the Doctor were standing right in front of me again.” “You must have a keen eye to detect something such as that.” Monotone would be the best way to describe his voice, as if he were distancing himself from her, preparing himself for her imminent demise. “I feel I should warn you. You can’t stop me.” She never even turned to look at him, content with just staring at the “scenery”. “Gravity. It’s a difficult force to master, but when one has, it opens up so many possibilities. A blessing...and a curse. It has been theorized that gravity affects many things in the universe, even time itself. Well, I can assure you, Mr. Faraday,” she slowly turned her head, her blood-red eyes glaring slightly at him, “those theories are true.” “Well, we’ll just have to see, now won’t we?” He began walking straight ahead as he spoke. “Until next time, Kat Shifter, I wish you well.” And he was gone. Kat took a cautionary glance around, using her gravity sense to feel for any additional disturbances. After a moment, she confirmed he was gone and sighed. “Why is it always the good-looking ones who are the bad guys? And he was such a gentleman. Oh well, I’d best find where the recruits have set up camp.” Kat took flight from there, heading in the direction of a large white castle that loomed over the far landscape. Halfway Between the Arena and the Hero’s Base “Achoo!” Nicholas sneezed. “Wonder-” he sniffled “-what that’s all about.” He then continued his way to the Hero’s base. Neutral Territory…                  Essence sipped her tea cheerily. So far, aside from being squished by a giant robot, all was well. That and her tea came out wonderfully.Then, something came bounding along in the distance. She squinted, unable to see that far even with her superb sight. The window, about the size of the wall itself, helped none at all. The shape came closer, and she saw what appeared to be a zergling. Shrugging it off, she went back to drinking her tea. Sensing it watching, she looked out the window.         “YOU’RE LATE FOR TEA, IDIOT!” she chucked a teacup at the zergling. Now, we won’t let it be said that in Umbra’s Universe there was never a finer throw. It arced through the air and landed perfectly on the zerglings head without a sound. It seemed to growl for a second, before retreating to a ‘safe’ distance. It seemed to be waiting for something.         She ignored the zergling and went back to sipping her.. tea? Well now it’s coffee.         “I need to get control of that,” she mumbled. About a minute passed before a huge goddess-damned worm erupted out of the ground a little way from the zergling.         “Well then,” she said. What looked like a male Broodmother came out of the worm, with a small honor guard. It started walking toward her. Rolling her eyes, Essence walked out of the small wooden fortress.         “Hello, how are you? Care for some tea? Oh wait it…” she looked into the cup again, “Goddess dang it. It’s coffee again.” The male Broodmother seemed startled, before continuing to walk, and said,         “Hello! I’m doing just fine. I was just coming to see my neighbor. Well, and to see which side you’re on. My name’s Dahaka, by the way.”         “Ah. You must not have seen the sign,” Essence gestured to the massive neon sign proudly displaying the words ‘Neutral Territory’. Dahaka then stopped and facepalmed.         “Well, that answers that question. Any way, yes, some tea would be nice.” He seemed to dismiss his guard, as they streamed back to the worm. Essence led him into the fortress. She grabbed a teacup and spun her finger over it. The cup filled with tea and she handed it to him.         “Here,” she said.         He took a sip and looked at her confused, “This is coffee.”         “Sorry, it likes to switch around. I blame the teacup,” she shrugged. Suddenly a small voice spoke up, “Hey!”         “Quiet down Chip, your mother owes me still.” Dahaka seemed startled, but conformed quickly.         “So, you do sl-” He seemed to think a moment, “Payment of debt b-” He seemed to shake his head before trying again. “Work debt?”         She giggled at the stutters. “Naw. His mother wants him to build character. Besides. They didn’t like their old job.” He seemed satisfied.         “What was their old job? If I may ask?”         “Old castle. Prince turned into beast. Prince died. You know. Alternate world stuff.” He waved his han- cl- appendage in a knowing manner.         “Yes, I do. The mere fact of our being here suggests that there is everything everywhere. But, does that mean that they are stuck as cups, tea pots, and utensils?”         “Yes and no. I let them switch. Although Chip here seems to be happy as a cup.” The small voice spoke up again, “NO I’M NOT!”         “Do we want a repeat of Trelawny?” Essence asked. The little cup meeped and was quiet. “Anyway. They’re paid well.” He replied,         “The Greeks, or was it the Romans?”, He seemed to think a moment before shaking off his revery, “One of those two kept paid slaves, and if the slaves could save up enough money, they could buy their freedom. Not that I’m saying that their situation is similar to that, but It’s just a little fact about history.         “Indentured servitude? I believe that was Greeks. Romans were overly violent,” she answered, “that and Romans feared the ocean.” He seemed to get a little steamed at a thought that brought up.         “I don’t like the fact that they ‘improved’ the greek gods. I mean, look at poor Athena, she was reduced to a goddess of just weaving, essentially. Before, she was a goddess of wisdom, victory, AND weaving. And they glorified war by use of Mars Ultor.”         “Nike and Victoria are the victory goddesses. That aside, Jupiter’s a jerk. Have you met him? Goddess, he was rude. The Greek ones are so much nicer. Except Ares. He can be a little forceful,” she said, making multiple hand gestures. He seemed to wince. But with his face, it was anyone’s guess.         “I haven't, but I’ll keep that in mind. I suspect Ares would want to start with a eternal war between us. But one question, who’s this Goddess you keep referring to?”         She grinned, and her eyes twinkled. “Why do you ask?”         “Because I’m as nosy as a witch when it comes to things like that.” Her smile seemed to shine, “Fair enough answer. You’ve already met her. I am Madness of the Void and the Musician.” He raised a metaphorical eyebrow. “So, you're going on an ego trip by invoking your own name all the time? Well, each to their own. Also, you’ll have to tell me the story behind that sometime.” She giggled. “Oh. I’m not invoking my name. I’m invoking my past self. I’m a fallen goddess by technicality.” “Hmm, I’ll try not to make any Satan jokes about that. Also, now I’m particularly intrigued about your past. Could you tell me?” “Even better. I can show you.” She hummed lightly before a shimmering image appeared. The other void dwellers and Essence sat at a table wondering how to best stop the Merchant. Essence is the one called The Musician or, more commonly, Madness. The Scientist, The Trainer, The Cook, don’t ask why he’s here, The Magician, The Writer, The Historian, and several others sat around the table with an orb at the center, which glowed blue. “So,” Scientist spoke up, “We know why we’re here… It seems our ‘friend’ the Merchant has decided to screw with, well, everything. His actions are starting to break certain important barriers between particular Worlds. From what we’ve gathered these are the main supporters of his cause, The Torturer, The Reaper, The Silent, The Ripper, and The Illusionist. The Illusionist happens to be a friend of Madness here, and has deigned to give us this information out of respect. She also agreed to play as a double agent. Any questions?” “What’s our agenda?” asked The Trainer. “Send someone to infiltrate the worlds.” “But, the Fausticorn. She’ll stop them. She only let The Merchant through because he tricked her.” “I spoke with her recently. It was a very distressing matter as she distrusts us at large. Letting her know our allegiance allows us to put a champion in.” “Then who?” “There is one obvious choice,” They all looked at me. “Me?” “You also have the titles, The Strategist and The Warrior, correct?” “Yes, but that doesn’t mean I’m a good choice.” They shook their heads. “You’re the only choice, seeing as though you are closer tied to Equestria.” Essence groaned. “Fine, but don’t cry to me when I fail.” “Meeting adjourned.”         Dahaka waited a moment before asking, “So you came to a world, what happened after you came? If I may ask?”         “Lost all of my memories and shadow abilities. My memories came back when I accidently left the multiverse.”         “What about your powers? Don't you have them?”         “You mean these?” She waved a hand and the floor changed to diamond. Then she sang and the diamond returned to normal. The wail of a guitar suddenly burst through the area with a VWORPLE. “ROCK ME, AMADEUS!” “Oh, hey Umbra. Come on in!”, Dahaka’s eye’s widened as this happened. Sliding into view with a truly impressive guitar riff, Umbra spun to a stop in front of Essence. Crickets sounded as a tumbleweed floated past. – Somewhere  Gilgamesh frowned. “Why do I feel like someone just stole my schtick?” – Essence claps. “Now. Umbra. Dahaka asked for a hamburger. Shall we?” Dahaka looked around warily, feeling something off for a second at the word hamburger. Then he relaxed and said, “That would be nice. I actually haven't had a meal in... oh, about since I became a Zerg? Yes, that seems right.” Umbra stared blankly at the both of them as reality began to twist and bend in ways unimaginable to the human mind. A song played in the background. “You want….. a hamburger?” The world shifts and Dahaka found himself to be a small boy. A woman hands him a hamburger. The hamburger screams and the woman turns into a hamburger. Dahaka asked for a hamburger. The world shifts upwards and the woman turns into a talking toilet which shoots out toilets which shoot out hamburgers. Dahaka asked for a hamburger. Once again reality shifts. A small boy takes a bite out of Dahaka the hamburger. Mayo tears slide down Dahaka’s face. The boy bites and his mother drops and turns into a chicken. Dahaka asked for a hamburger. The chicken says the word dinosaur over and over. Reality shatters. Dahaka asked for a hamburger. Reality tries to reassert itself. The small boy melts as though he were a clock in a Dali painting. He screams. The Hamburger asks for a Dahaka. Upon receiving it, the hamburger takes a bite as reality begins to blur between real and fictional. “Okay, that’s enough trolling. We’re starting to corrupt the coding in this area. Oh gods I need to fix that now.” Reality reasserts itself, the last few eternities dissipating like dust in the wind. Dahaka, Essence and Umbra are seated at a picnic table with trays of In n’ Out burgers. The bench immediately breaks because of how Dahaka’s shaped, but the thought’s still there. “But it was just getting fun Umbra!” Essence whined. Dahaka looks like his mind has shattered. A glazed look is on his face. His eye’s begin to change color for a moment, before the previous lacquer leaves his eyes. He shakes his head, and tries to forget the past eternity. It partially works. “Alhmarka, isherto, hrart kootie giblet.” He says. “Yes. And?” Essence asks. Dahaka pauses for a second, before adding, “Add a partridge in a blender sings nicely.” “So does a tree wrapped toilet paper with dig bick.” He shakes his head, and says, “Ring around the rosy, jack went pop and the muffin man’s coming. And,” The same glow from before came over his eyes, and then receded. “And, sanity has reasserted itself. Thank you Prime.” “Damn.” Essence curses. “And here I thought I’d have to manually reset everyone’s sanity after introducing the Cuil system. Oh well.” “You should have known there would be no need to mess with mine. If I went sane who knows what kind of mediocre and baise things I’d do,” Essence shuddered. Dahaka ignored this, and reached for a hamburger. “What, like start making sense?” Dahaka lifted the hamburger to his face. His mouth was barely large enough to get any in, but he still stuffed it in. The hamburger screamed before its tortured yowls were cut off as Dahaka consumed it. The Dahaka gets munched by a hamburger. “Yes, I would start making sense. Not fun. I tried it once. Accidentally blew up a small planet, fixed it, the residents see me as their goddess now.  Also happened to up their evolution too. But that aside, I think you missed a section Umbra…” Essence said, thinking about that mistake.The hamburger slowly sizzles in the ambient sanity. “Whoops.” VWORPLE Dahaka just sat there, happily munching. Between the Hero base and the arena… Two gates of equal standing, one made of obsidian while the other was made of wood, a rarity in the desert, begun to rise out of the sands. Wisps of an unnatural flame could be seen coming off both, but where one was calming and almost brought a certain joy the other brought a slight feeling of fear and despair. At once both gates opened, a few hundred yards away from each other. From one stepped out a woman with golden hair bright enough to almost be a light in the dark, a calm air about her as she kept her gaze directly towards the opposing gate, upon her mask was a consistent smile. From the other stepped out a man with hair so black it seemed indistinguishable in shape as it sucked in the light around it, his own mask looking as if to snarl while black tongues of fire licked at the hem of his clothes. A And Z: The Other Letters are On Vacation Freddy’s Protectors (Chaotic Neutral) (Zero should avoid these two, for his own physical and mental safety) As if compelled by some unheard command they both teleported directly in front of each other, one in a burst of black and the other a golden explosion. “Now be sure to behave alright?”Stated the woman, cheerfulness present in her voice as the man simply moved in a way that represented how one would roll their eyes, as he did not have any to roll. “Just make sure to stay out of my way, your pathetic peacekeepers won’t be anything but a distraction.” His voice held an ever existent malice hidden behind a curtain of neutrality. She seemed to laugh as she briefly turned towards her own gate, a thousand almost identical soldiers walking out as she returned her gaze, all clad in light golden armour as a large hammer was strapped across their backs. Each step seeming to tread the ground into place as grass could be seen seeping through the sand. “I didn’t realise we were competing, Z, we have the same goal for once after all.” “Of course it’s a competition, though it’ll be hard to justify our killstreaks if no one remembers who they’ve killed.” A grim chuckle escaped his lips as he tilted his head slightly, not bothering with meaningless gestures as he simply shouted “REAPERS!” A thousand more poured from the opposite gate, their heavy armour almost in tatters as they emanated malice and discontent. Scythes had been strapped to their backs and if one listened they could hear the sound of chains grinding against each other as fine teeth could be seen on the edge of their blades. Their presence seemed to drain the life out of the already lifeless landscape. “Honestly, you couldn’t tone down a little on the…. evilness of your units?” A waved her hands about in the general direction of the Reapers, to which Z simply shrugged. “The scythes are effective, the armours are protective, now if you’ll please get out of my way I can follow my directive.” He held up his fist, the back facing the reapers as they nodded as one and flowed into the ground as a puddle of black flames, each moving towards Z as they joined to his cape, lengthening it considerably as it spread out behind him. “Do try and keep up.” A’s mask turned to a slight pout as she simply waved towards one of her commanding officers who nodded in turn as she turned to bark orders at her soldiers. In an almost imitation they replicated the actions of the Reapers, every single Peacekeeper falling into a golden flame as they moved to join with A’s dress that flowed along the sand. “I doubt he’ll be happy to see us.” She stated simply, sighing as she looked across the landscape. “Of course he won’t be happy to see you, me on the other hand,” His masked turned into a wide smirk as he looked towards the same direction, “Oh he’ll be simply furious.” They both stood there, garments shifting in a non-existent wind as their opposing flames visibly moved in opposing directions, their gazes locked onto the distant horizon, in the direction of the villain camp beyond the arena. Z however was brought out of his silence as he spotted a figure headed to the castle behind them, briefly looking over his features as the holes in his masks eyes seemed to ignite for an instant. “I do believe we’ve found an opponent.” “So soon?” A moved her gaze as well, her eyes shining over for a split-second, “We can’t harm him since the war has not started, those’re the rules e-Z-mac.” Z groaned as his eyeless gaze returned to A’s visage, “Another nickname? Why do you find them necessary?” “Not necessary Led Zeppelin, just fun.” She gave a light laugh as the figure came closer, her expression cheery with a hint of cheekiness as per status quo. “Now, just quick hello’s then we get going alright?” “What’s this? Travelers? Greetings!” came a voice from a little ways away. “He seems… friendly?” “Of course he’s friendly, he’s the kind to buy souvenirs for girls even when they have money. Anynoodle, hello!” A cheerfully waved towards the voice. “Anynoodle? Who’s that? And how do you apparently know so much about me? I know nothing of you.” He approached; and, as he did so, the two got a better look at him. He was wearing a long, brown trench coat with green highlights, along with black dress slacks and a black vest. His white shirt showed out from under the other garments and the goggles on his head shone with a brilliance only tempered glass can give. “Well, I suppose we can trust anyone willing enough to sock it to a Princess, even if it wasn’t a very good hit. You may refer to me as Z.” He looked almost reluctant to talk to the person before him as his cape flared slightly, easily dodging the mans questions. “Don’t mind him, he just realised he shouldn’t have worn a cape to the desert. I’m A by the way, pleasure to meetcha.” She held her hand out towards the man, the ever present smile on her mask backed up by her calm eyes as the flames on her own clothes calmed somewhat. “Oh, I don’t mind at all. Not the first person to dislike me upon our meeting.” He reaches out, clasping her hand in his own before bringing it to his face and kissing the back of said hand. “I’m Nicholas. Call me Nick for short.” He the released her hand, letting his own fall to his side. A flashed a smug grin in Z’s direction briefly before turning back to Nicholas. “Don’t mind if I do, if you like you can call me A for short as well.” For his part Z just facepalmed while A smiled towards Nicholas calmly. “Alright, A, also known as A, I’ll simply call you A, for simplicity’s sake. We don’t need to cause issues in the future with a name as long as yours,” he smirked knowingly. She simply chuckled and tilted her head behind her in a slight gesture. “Headed that way I presume?” The castle in the distance behind them simply glimmered in the sunlight. “What was your first clue?” he asked with a raised eyebrow. “The footsteps leading in that direction or the fact that you’re walking away from the place and we happened to run into each other like this?” Z briefly tempered his gaze as he looked at Nicholas, moving it beyond him and towards the Villain camp in the distance. “You can handle this one, never liked manipulators.” His mask became a deepened frown as he simply walked past, avoiding eye contact as he headed to the camp. On the other hand A only seemed to cheer up more. “Ooh, ooh, I pick C. No wait, this wasn’t multiple choice sorry. In which case….. what is ‘logical train of thought’?” – Announcer’s Booth Umbra winced. “Ooh! Sorry, but that answer is not correct!” BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT – “Darn!” A snapped her fingers as she silently cursed her bad luck. “Well to be honest it was because you seem to really want to help people, and considering the… grandeur of the castle back there I’d think that’s where the good chaps go.” “‘Good chaps’? You say it like you’re not one.” Nicholas chuckles slightly. “I mean, you are on your way to the arena to fight, or, at least, to the enemy base... Right?” “Guy in the sky? Do the buzzer thing again.” – Announcer’s Booth “Heh heh, you got it, luv” BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT – “Cheers” She briefly gave the clouds a thumbs up before turning back to Nick. “So sorry there, but I’m on a strict ‘protect and serve if you really feel like it I guess’, kind of mission, and the guy I’m protecting is on that side.” “D-does that mean I have to k-kill you?” He reels back a little. “Aw, well you don’t have to if you don’t want to. But if you really feel like it…” The bottom half of her mask seemed to tear as rows of sharp teeth formed across the mouth, her eyes burning brilliantly as her hair seemed to disobey gravity while it caught fire. She spoke with what sounded to be hundreds of voices, all calm and almost warm-hearted. “You’re certainly welcome to take a shot.” “I-I don’t really w-want to. Sorry?” He’s more confused than anything at this point. She almost seems like she wanted him to try. In an instant she returned to normal, a calm smile once more etched into her mask. “That’s perfectly fine boyo! Hopefully I won’t have to kill anyone once the fighting begins, leave the murdering to the murderers and the burgers to the fry cooks I say!” A faint ‘That has no relevance!’ could be heard in the direction of the camp. “Oh, alright, then. Thank you. I didn’t want to kill just yet.” He takes a deep breath, returning to his calm self. “Anyway, it was a pleasure to meet you, A. I hope we never see each other on the field of battle.” He smiled as he stuck a hand out for her to shake. She chuckled as she stepped towards him and gave him a high-five, “That’s assuming you can kill me, have fun following the yellow brick road!” A laughed as she stepped past him, her dress flashing briefly as a yellow brick path formed out beneath a flash of fire, headed straight towards the castle. “O-okay, then…. Off to see the wizard, I guess.” Nicholas then follows the aforementioned Yellow Brick Road. – Announcer’s Booth “You’re off to see the Wizard~ The wonderful Wizard of Oz~” Umbra bolted upright. “FUCK! I hate that song!” – A calmly strides towards the Villain camp, squinting slightly as she all but whispered to herself. “Now that I know someone is watching, what will it take to stop you from telling any undesirables about me and my companions… apparel?” VWORPLE Skreeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-SLAM THUD “What apparel? -Umbra” A quick roll of her eyes and a few steps later she began to talk again. “You know exactly what I mean. I’m referring to the… armies up our sleevies if you will.” Vworple “Oh…. eh. I don’t really do a lot of telling here. So…. just don’t ask me for stuff and I won’t tell anything to anyone. -Umbra” A small pout was present on her mask. “Aww, can’t I ask for just one itty-bitty thing?” Bloop “Okay. Just because you seem fun. And because everyone gets one.” She scanned the sky, her eyes briefly shimmering as they came across the announcers booth far out of sight range, a smirk appearing on her mask once more. “We both know that’s not true now don’t we?” She chuckled slightly before going on her way again. “Could you increase the molecular attraction between sand particles ever so slightly in my general vicinity?” Plop “I’m almost afraid to ask why. But sure.” Shsshshshshshshssshhh She cheered as she jumped up, pushing down as she landed only to be pushed back in the air once more, laughing as she kept bouncing along until she sailed past Z, doing a flip and sticking her tongue out at him as she sailed right past his face; to which he only groaned slightly and trudged along, “Why would anyone encourage her?” Vwwwwm “Oh yeah. I forgot about what happens when I do that.” Teridax stood up, stretched. The wait was helping him out, enough that Auric would actually have to pressure him when he finally arrived. Ah, he could wait a long, long time. The heart on his chest glowed a little brighter, and he tapped it. “Hush now. Everything is as it should be.” He casually scried out the location of the hero base and snorted. “I would say that it’s fairly melodramatic, but that would be rather hypocritical. Shame that miss Kat’s there; would have liked to talk to her. Try and convince her that this war is nothing important.” Another flicker of attention, on a being surrounded by the Laser Wasps of Umbra’s planet. “Ah, Nemesis. How very interesting. Yes… this is the perfect time for goodwill.” With that, he stood up, and with nought but a thought teleported out, near Nemesis, where he was unsuccessfully holding his own. A simple thought, and the Laser Wasps backed off, and Teridax strode forwards, holding his arms at his sides to show that he brought no weapon. “Hello, Mr. Nemesis. How are you today?” Nemesis brought his fist around to intercept an oncoming wasp, but only hit air as they quickly backed away from their target. Nemesis spun on the spot, coming face to face with what he could only describe as a robotic shadow. “And just who the hell are you?” Nemesis, his head still pounding from the rush of battle, growled as his eye flared red. Teridax smiled, already picking up on the psychic pressure of the T-virus. “I am Teridax. You may have heard of me. And don’t think about attacking me. Because if you do, I’ll push that rage of yours to the point that rage is all you’ll ever be… and I’ll throw you back into your own world.” Skreeeeeeeeee-Slam! Both jumped back as yet another capsule fell from orbit. This time, the capsule opened to reveal a human, this one thin and short, about five feet ten inches tall. As the unknown human stood, he opened his eyes and immediately his identity became known. After all, who else would have eyes that exuded such raw power from their pitch black depths? Umbra spoke, “Dammit Teridax! Meddling is my schtick over here! Do your stupid meddling some other time!” “Umbra, I am willing to uphold the rules of this war. I swear, on my honour that I will not fight, harm or kill any of the other side until it has started. I am here to… talk. But my threat, Nemesis, is real. I am perfectly capable of that. I merely won’t do that until this war has started.” “Teridax?” Nemesis’ words were twisted, a combination of his own voice and something else. He began to advance towards him. “Youuu...you were the one who…” Nemesis stopped when he remembered the threat, his grip tightening on his weapon as his footsteps halted. He shook for only a moment before he took a step back. “Fine. What are you here for, then?” Teridax shapeshifted, into the form of Auric. And smiled. “Nemesis, I can feel in the back of your mind an incredible rage. It comes from the T-virus that permeates your veins.” He then shifted into the form of Celestia, who continued. “There is no normal way to defeat this virus, of course.” Another shift, and he was Twilight Sparkle. “Except for a genius like myself.” He then returned to his normal form. “Tell me, Nemesis, what would you give for the chance to be free of that rage forever?” Nemesis suddenly burst out into laughter. ”So what, you’re saying you’re here to resolve my anger management issues?” Nemesis snorted. ”If what you’ve done so far is how you go about it, you’re a pretty shitty therapist.” Umbra spoke up, “I don’t normally do thi– okay who am I kidding, I do this a lot, but I can get rid of that virus for free…. or if you’re willing to pay about fifteen bits I can give it a toggle and remove the rage. I think, Teriyaki, that I make better sales pitches. Y’know, being an interdimensional salesman and all.” Teridax shrugged. “My product will not remove the virus in its entirety, but will grant you everything you want- no rage, no infection spread, all the benefits. And, I will ask you this- my price is simply to not get in my way when I fight Auric. Fight anyone else you want, but don’t get in my way or Auric’s. And one more thing.” He looked at Umbra pointedly. “I can’t read your mind, but I can make an educated guess. You’re associated with the merchant fellow who sent people like Nemesis here, aren’t you.” Nemesis broke his glare at Teridax and shifted it to Umbra with a growl, as if expecting a reply. He got one. “The Merchant. Fucking asshole still needs a kick in the nuts. Keeps slipping away though. Never really have the time to go after him. Besides, who among us would honestly want to go back to living their powerless lives back on Earth after all of this? I wouldn’t. Anynoodle, yeah, I work with the same guild that The Merchant is in. ‘Cept he’s way down on the ‘Do Not Sell’ list and I’m near the top somehow.” Teridax nodded. “In which case, I apologise for thinking you were associated with him. But my offer still stands, Nemesis. Either of our offers are good. And, as a show of good faith, I will have Mr. Umbra here verify that what I promise is true.” He pulled out a vial of silvery powder, and with a slight flourish handed it over to Umbra. The humanised shadow shrugged and sniffed the vial, his eyes blinking twice in confusion. “Well I’ll be…. usually you master manipulator types make stuff that’s actually just sugar water or something. But this stuff….. it’s actually damn good! It does exactly what he says it’d do!” Teridax snorted. “Mr Umbra, you know that the Makuta are masters of Viruses that can create life. Compared to that, this was a cakewalk. And don’t hand it to me; I won’t have you accusing me of switching the vials or anything. Besides, I know that you were the kind of person who would check anyway, so making a fake solution is worthless.” “This is true. Well Nemesis, it’s your choice now….. Hey….. what’s that sound?” Nemesis pinched the bridge of his nose with his thumb and index finger. ”Umbra, I swear to God if you brought more of those things here…” Umbra shifted back to normal, “No no, not that sound, a different sound…… sounds like……. a person…..” From down below them, the noise continued to grow louder and louder. Then a large geiser of sand burst forth, shooting out a human boy in his late teens, falling to the ground in front of them. “Aw ha ha ha, that sucked!” he groaned, try to at least get up on his knees. “What the hell did I just do?” “Given your appearance, Mr. Ben Tennyson, I would say that you’ve just tunnelled out of the ground.” Teridax remarked, dry as the wasteland surrounding them. The insects around him buzzed loudly, unsure of this person but he silenced them with a look. “Wrong dude, I’m not Tennyson. He’s in his own universe,” Ben said as he finally got on his two feet and cracked his neck. “Aww~, it’s always the neck.” “Oh. Hey Ben,” Umbra deadpanned, forming a small barrier around himself, Teridax, and Ben to shield their conversation. “Wait…. eh. Nemesis can probs survive out there a while. So, what brings you out here to the middle of nowhere?” “I don’t know,” he replied rubbing his sore neck. “I was just screwin’ around with my new powers and then ‘poof’, I’m flying through sand.” Ben looks at the other being with Umbra, raising an eyebrow at him. “And it seems I’ve come face-to-face with a nightmare come true. Makuta Teridax, I presume?” Teridax bowed. “Yes, Mr. Ben, representative of the Greek gods. I am Teridax.” “So you’re the jackass that’s the reason we’re all here.” Ben eyed him up and down before shrugging. “Eh, I’ve seen weirder.” “I know.” “I think at this point we’ve all seen weirder…….. like that one time I….. nope. Not telling that one. Bad enough to just experience it…” “I meant more that he really isn’t that scary. Hell, the Daleks were scarier than you are.” “Daleks aren’t scary at all. Weeping Angels though…. Terrifying bitches they are, though only when they’re starving. The rest of the time they’re pleasant girls…. a little morbid but pleasant all the same.” Ben looked at Umbra very strangely, before pinching the bridge of his nose and sighing. “I really need to stop being around you people. You’re going to drive away what’s left of my sanity.” Ben frowned for a moment. “I don’t care what you think, Power, we’re not starting the war prematurely. And you shut up, Honor, this doesn’t involve you.” Teridax nodded. “Until Auric appears, I’m not making any moves whatsoever, and neither will those who follow me.” “Huh, a villain who honors the rules. Haven’t met one of those in a while. Sorry about talking to myself, the other guys are pretty vocal nowadays. And more than a few want to tear you to shreds just for shits and giggles.” Teridax studied him for a few moments. “I obey the laws that Umbra has created because I know the consequences for breaking them would be terrible. Even then, I really don’t care about what you do, just as long as Auric’s here.” “Well I’m only here because I promised I would be. Don’t really even have a stake in war, well save for the chance to finally meet my long lost sister.” Teridax nodded. “I wish you luck in your endeavour. But a word of warning…” He shifted into the form of Umbra “get in between me and Auric and I’ll cut you down. He. Is. Mine.” “Like I care,” Ben sneered back. “If it happens, it happens, get over yourself. You’re. Nothing. Special.” Teridax shrugged. “Really. If you say so, Mr. Ben. You may find me more dangerous than you think. Until the war officially starts, though… I won’t do anything.” “I eagerly await,” he replied sarcastically. “Go back to your little hide-away, you obsessed weirdo.” Ben made a sign of “shooing” with his hand. “Go on, get.” Umbra suddenly jolted, “Whoo, okay….. that was a weird three centuries…… what did I miss while I was out of this body? … And why does Teridax look like me now?” Teridax shifted back. “Me and Ben were having an enlightening conversation as to the current ceasefire. Now, hopefully we will leave with civility and respect.” “Not likely,” Ben replied looking highly uninterested. Teridax shrugged. “If you want incivility, then I am perfectly capable of that.” The insects buzzed angrily, responding to their masters’ will. “Dammit. This is what happens when I get called away for three centuries and try to come back to the exact moment I left….” Ben looked at Umbra, quiet for a moment, then asked, “Umbra? Do you still have that badge I gave you? The one that acts as my token?” “Huh? Oh yeah, here it is,” Handing it over, Umbra cocked his head, “Why do you need it?” “Because,” he said as he typed in a few commands. “I made a decision a while back, and I’m sticking it to it.” Ben tossed the badge back to Umbra, but the green had now become a dull grey. “Eh?” “I deactivated it.” “No more calling on you then? Shame. Oh well, c’est la vie. Here, take this,” Tossing over an emerald green smart phone, Umbra continued, “It’s a personalized Token. Mine, to be exact. Just call me up whenever you feel like it. There’s a lot of stuff to do on it and it’s got infinite battery life, reception no matter where you are in the Multiverse, it’s almost indestructible, it’s got Wi-Fi everywhere, Flash Player, and it can project a screen and keyboard in case you want a laptop instead of a smart phone.” He turned to Teridax, “No, you don’t get one. Not unless you prove yourself worthy of it.” Teridax gave the impression of smiling. “I don’t plan on living long enough to really benefit from it anyway.” Ben looked at the phone in his hand then to Umbra. “Thanks,” then he crushed it, “but no. I don’t want your token. Or anyone else’s.” “Dammit, that was a custom! You coulda at least used it for the entertainment value! And the efficiency value. It’s great for getting work done.” “I don’t care, I’ve already made my decision.” “An’ I respect that…… Want a laptop?” “No Umbra. Once this war is over, there is only one thing I want from you.” “And that would be?” “To leave me alone. When this is all done, I don’t want anything to do with the Displaced anymore. Certain people I will let keep my totem, but the rest will be permanently deactivated.” “Okay, whew, I thought you were gonna say something a lot more upsetting. But yeah, that’s fine…… wait….. does that mean I can’t just hang out anymore? I mean, I’ve only seen your Universe once and that was just your room. I kinda wanted to explore a little. Not like you could stop me but I like to ask permission.” “It’s partially for your own good. You are a wanted criminal in my Universe, after all.” “Wait what. Why am I a criminal?” “The Celestialsapiens, my bosses, hate your guts.” “They are aware that I was the one that evolved their silly, star-patterned asses from space whales all those eons ago, right? Okay, some of that was my subordinates practicing, but I started the evolution. I mean….. they can’t stop me either as long as I have a good reason. And this District being what it is….. I’m allowed to see you guys as long as I don’t meddle too much.” “They don’t like anyone who’s on par or more powerful than they are. So….thems the breaks. The other part is….I don’t really see you as a friend.” “...Great time to change that viewpoint then….. I just noticed that we’ve been ignoring Teridax for a while….. Sorry about that.” Teridax waved a hand. “Not really a problem. It’s good to see that there are some who are willing to disrespect a Sysadmin. They do know what you could do if you really felt like it?” “Of course they know, but they are willing to use anything they can to get rid of the guy. SysAdmins are not welcome in a Universe that has Celestialsapiens. Never have been, never will be.” “Bet I could do something about that…. Ah well, as always, c’est la vie. Not much point trying to keep me out when – Oh would you look at that, I’m already there. And always was. And will be. And won’t be. And every other permutation of the concept of presence. Because I exist in every point on my personal ball of infinite timelines simultaneously. So I’m everywhere. And nowhere. Fitting for a shadow, eh? There but not there. Interacting without interacting. Death likes his symbolism.” Ben simply shook his head. “Look it’s nothing personal, but just stay out. I’m giving that message to all Displaced. They’re not welcome in my world anymore. Never really wanted them to be in first place.” Umbra crossed his arms and narrowed his eyespots, “Quick tangent; there’s a stray thread on your collar and it’s been bugging me for the past few minutes. Kindly remove it, please.” He rolled his eyes and snapped his fingers, destroying the small strand...and a mile of wasteland behind him. “Ehehehe…..oops.” “It’s just wasteland. Nothing much there. Except….. yup. There goes my favorite tumbleweed bush. Damn. Now I need to replant it. Anyways, I’m still going to hang out every now and then, seeing as I’m not really a Displaced anymore. And because I think we’d be great friends. And to piss off those over-grown space-whale descendants. Feckin’ cunts, the majority of them. The adolescents are usually okay though. Some of them actually like me.” “Not in mine. You are on the top of the Most Unwanted list. Sorry. And I’m sorry, but to me you are a Displaced and you are not welcome in my world. Not now, not ever.” “‘Kay…. Then I’ll hang out with one of your Alternates. Some of them actually like me.” “Fine by me. But I need a better commitment than that. Pinkie Promise to never come back to my universe again.” “I, uh, I’m not allowed to make those because of how I mangle causality…. I preemptively break them before they’re made…..” “Make it or I leave.” “Well, it’s my head Pinkie’s going to be hunting…….. Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my – OH GOD THAT STINGS,” Umbra grasped his frosting covered face, screaming in pain, “OH GOD WHY DID I ACTUALLY SHOVE A CUPCAKE IN MY EYE.” “Because you’re not all there, Shadow. Unlike some of us.” Ben frowned again. “Not asking for your opinion, Hum. Or yours Superiority….oh shut up, the lot of you! Gah, why did Nexus have to leave me with these damn jerks?!” “...Hypocrite,” Umbra suddenly froze, shivering violently, “And there it goes. I have now broken a Pinkie Promise for the five hundredth time. Seriously, why would you tell someone with near Omnipresence not to go somewhere!?” “Because they’re not welcome. And good luck with that broken Pinkie Promise. Fair warning, my Pinkie is a big fan of bear traps.” “Lord almighty. Good thing those don’t work on me.” Teridax shook his head. “Enough. I would like to finish talking with Nemesis.” The B.O.W. in question was standing just outside of the barrier Umbra had formed around the three of them. His back was to them and his arms were crossed as if he was in thought. Teridax simply teleported outside and looked at Nemesis. “Well, Nemesis? Who do you choose?” Nemesis shifted his gaze towards Teridax. He snorted. “Can I see that vial?” Teridax teleported back in, grabbed the vial and teleported back, handing it over. “If you want, you can check with Umbra again, to ensure that I didn’t switch it.” Nemesis held the vial between two fingers and raised it into the sky as he stared at it. “I don’t think that’ll be necessary.” He lowered his hand, and allowed the vial to rest in his palm. “Teridax…” He began, staring down at the vial. Then he closed his fist, the vial cracking slightly. “You collaborated with my enemy in a world that was not yours. You prolonged the suffering of those who didn’t even deserve it for the sake of your own gain.” The vial cracked further. “You created a being designed to chase me down and kill me no matter where I went, and if that’s not enough it’s that on top of the other crimes you’ve committed against other Displaced around the multiverse.” The vial shattered completely, and the liquid ran down Nemesis’ knuckle. “I may be fucked up in the head, but I’m of sound mind enough to know right from wrong. And what you did? What you’ve done? It’s wrong.” Nemesis’ eye burned red. “You have your little lovers’ spat with Auric, I frankly don’t give a damn. Both he and you have made it clear that the fight is between you two, and if Auric wins,” Nemesis growled. “No, when he wins, because he will win, if he doesn’t kill you, you can bet your ass I’ll be there to finish the job. I’ll find a way to defeat this virus, Teridax, but it won’t be from you.” Teridax looked at him. “It’s so rare to meet a man of your principles. I’m almost touched.” He looked at the liquid pooling on the ground. “It doesn’t matter in the long run. Whether or not you accept my gift, the outcome is still the same.” Teridax looked him in the eye. “If I win, I win. I’m the better man between me and Auric. If I lose, and Auric kills me, I’ve done something sensational. I’ve broken a man who is my equal. And if he can’t muster up the energy to kill me… I have ways of defying imprisonment.” He shook his head. “Do you really think Auric would allow you to kill me? You know him. He’s a man of principles, just like you and me.” Nemesis snorted again. “Principles? Principles went out the window the moment you decided to work with someone who uses a virus that mutates innocents into weapons. As far as I’m concerned you’re a canniving bastard who doesn’t look out for anyone but themselves. If I have to wait to make sure you meet the ending you deserve, I can do that.” Teridax nodded. “I would be lying if I said that I knew you wouldn’t take the deal, but I’m not that surprised either. These things happen, and I decided to take a risk. By the way, how did you find out about my involvement? I really shouldn’t have trusted anybody with my name at all, but then again, that’s business for you.” “Princess Luna can be quite persuasive, especially when she’s interrogating high ranking members of Ellura who had an inkling of what went down between you and Inkwell.” Nemesis chuckled. “I suppose it helps when you can basically walk right into their minds as they sleep, too. They spoke about someone named Teridax who provided them with an improved virus formula, and provided them with what you named ‘Majora’. Kat Shifter filled me in on the rest.” Teridax blinked. “Ah, Kat Shifter… the one obsessed with revenge. Yes, I met her. How was Majora, by the way? I rather liked Majora. One of my finest creations… it’s good to hear some feedback.” He sat down and looked at Nemesis intently, waiting for the blow-by-blow report. (spoilers) Nemesis crossed his arms, scowling a bit. “ Well, during an attack on one of Ellura’s facilities in Canterlot, I summoned Jack of Blades for some assistance. His… madness god was rather displeased about this and summoned something from the resident evil verse, William Birkin, to kill me. We managed to defeat it and after we parted ways I made my way back to Ponyville through the Everfree. That’s when I first met your little...creation. I don’t know how, but he had absorbed some of the G-virus from William Birkin’s body and was adapting to my attacks before they even hit him.” Teridax actually seemed surprised. “Interesting. It really was supposed to adapt to your attacks when they hit it. Hm. Something to look into.” He waved a hand. “Continue.” “The g-virus itself has some adaptive abilities, I suppose it simply compounded on his own.” Nemesis growled a bit. “I wasn’t sure what he was, and he proved… quite the challenge. I only managed to incapacitate him and had to run, if I had stayed and fought him I probably would have been killed.” Teridax nodded. “Well, it was designed to be your perfect counter, after all. Only one weapon, and it would be difficult to defeat without outside assistance. I presume you managed to finally destroy Majora, but how on Earth did you do it?” “Well, he followed me to another Displaced’s universe. Jason’s, not sure if you know who he is. Anyways, Jason turned into someone he called Ghostfreak and possessed Majora, disabling its adaptive capabilities. After that I shot and beat him until he stopped moving.” Nemesis’ eye burned red. “But he showed up again. He attacked me in the depths of the Ellura facility in Fillydelphia, but he was severely weakened. He absorbed biomatter from some of the other B.O.W.s and turned into...something else. I can only really describe it as a shadow, not unlike yourself. It was a difficult fight, but in the end I tore him in half and threw his remains into superheated chemical waste.” Nemesis finished with a nod. “Some of the ponies helped me, I think without their help he probably would have killed me, though at that point I don’t think he was very intelligent anymore. He seemed...primal. Savage, even.” Nemesis shuddered at the memory. “Not unlike myself when I…” Nemesis shut his eye and shook his head. “Nevermind.” “When you gave in to that rage in the back of your mind?” Teridax stood up. “If I survive, I might have to work on ensuring the mental feedback doesn’t transmit that rage. Until then, Mr Nemesis, it was interesting to meet you.” Nemesis flinched as Teridax finished his sentence for him, then turned to watch him as he stood. “I wish I could say likewise, but I’ll be much more interested when this war is over and you’re locked far, far away or rotting in the ground.” His eye burned red as he growled. Teridax nodded. “Well, I think I’ll take my leave, Mr. Nemesis.” With that, he teleported out of existence. The laserwasps briefly wavered, then flew away from Nemesis, towards the villain base. Nemesis remained for a minute longer, staring at the spot Teridax had been before he took a deep breath, feeling his rage die down again. He rubbed his head as he turned towards the barrier with Umbra and Ben in it and knocked on it. “You two gonna be in there all day?” Ben nodded to Umbra to let down the shield, which fell a moment later. “Sorry ‘bout that. Personal chat. And...woah, you freaky boy.” “That’s what I get for dressing up as a biological weapon of mass destruction at a con. And you’re the second guy I’ve seen with that thing on your wrist.” “Oh, you must mean Jason. Yeah, he’s an okay guy, but I’m the true wielder of this thing. Name’s Ben, Ben 10X. And you are?” Nemesis nodded. “Nemesis. Just Nemesis. I was just looking to take Umbra up on his offer, seeing as Teridax probably won’t be doing me favors anytime soon after our little chat.” “So you’re taking up the offer, then? Good to hear,” Umbra rubbed his eyespots, “Man, I don’t know why, but I feel like I’ve been hopping timelines back and forth for years now…. Gods I’m so sleepy…” He slapped his head a few times before continuing, “Okay. I’m good. Let’s do this. You may feel a pinch…. or twelve thousand.” “Can’t be any more painful than the time Jason zapped me with his alien watch. Just get it over with.” “A’righty then…” Umbra snapped his fingers, and for a moment, Nemesis felt reality reworking itself as his vision swam and he experienced colors and sounds that were beyond even the wildest imagination. Including the taste of purple. “Grape? That’s rather expected…” Ben looked at Umbra with a cocked eyebrow. “Am I missing something here? Dufaq are you doing to the guy?” “I’m fucking with his coding and his DNA. It’s hard work. If he’s seeing weird things, well, it’s not my fault. It’s his brain’s.” “Umbra you are one weird ass shadow. But a cool one, I’ll admit.” “The chief of tribe Tunhamanhake extends gratitude for the beans you gave him last night!” Nemesis shouted inexplicably. He was okay though. Probably. “Was that babbling or was he serious?” Ben asked Umbra. “Hard to tell with all the shiz you do.” “I’m pretty sure it was babbling, though I did give a guy named Tunhamanhake a can of beans a few millennia ago when he was starving in the Mojave Desert,” Umbra answered, rubbing his chin thoughtfully, “I checked in on him in secret a few years after…. he made a tribe.” “Huh,” Ben commented. “Interesting. So, how long does this usually take?” “Should be done soon. T-Virus really hates outside mutations that it didn’t purposefully start. Hard to work around without killing the host.” When the deal with Nemesis was done, Teridax stood still for a moment, contemplating. He tapped the heart absent-mindedly. “He really should be here soon… I might actually have to delay my schedule a bit. Want a good way for him to be interested.” “Who you talkin’ about buddy?” came a woman’s voice. “The only intelligent person around here. Myself.” Teridax turned to the woman who was talking to him, already curious about the fact he couldn’t read her mind. “Oh ho ho! Look out guys! We got a badass over here!” she said as a crowd seemed to say, “Oooo.” Teridax watched her impassively. “I don’t think I have had the pleasure. You likely know who I am.” “Teridax, King of Shadows, Rival of Auric Fulcrum, met him once by the way, and a Displaced,” she closed the book she had pulled from nowhere,  “You might know of me, not quite sure, depends on who you know.” Teridax simply nodded. “No, I don’t know who you are, but I can make a couple of guesses. You clearly have access to a pocket dimension of some sort, putting your average power at the level of Umbra. So it’s likely that you’re a Sysadmin, or at least a similar level of entity. But your name, I do not know.” Essence nodded. “Similar to Umbra, yes. I don’t have need of a pocket dimension. I’m an entity similar to The Merchant. I’ve had multiple names but the one I use now is The Musician.” “Interesting.” Teridax absently looked around. The scenery around him was much the same. “When is Auric going to come here? The rest of the war is of no consequence if he doesn’t show up.” Essence shrugs. “I’ll do my best but no promises.” Teridax nodded. “I’ll hold you to that.” With that, he teleported back to his base, thinking about that chance encounter. Essence, in the meantime, disappeared. A loud whoop of joy escaped her as she landed in Umbra’s tricked out Announcer/DJ booth. A sound echoed from her landing. It was the same achievement sound that you get from a video game.  DUN DA DA DUN DUN DA DA! Essence scoffed. She’d have to fix that later. “Essence? Why the hell are you in my booth? I swear I locked that door.” Umbra stood from where he was reclining and floated over to his cot, settling into another reclined position. Essence put her hands together. “The answer to both is, I haven’t practiced teleporting, I wanted to land outside the door, and I met Teridax. He seems pissed at the delay. I said I’d do what I could.” “I see. Well, there’s snacks in the fridge, and drinks. There’s a game center over in that corner, and don’t touch the mix table. That one is a custom build.” As he spoke, Umbra pointed to the aforementioned corner– more of a large alcove, really– and to his custom built, super powerful, ultra-high performance mix table Mark XXXXII. He liked to call it “The Bass Dropper 9000”. Essence sniggered, “I don’t need a mix table, remember?” “Yes, but still. Don’t touch it. One wrong move would destroy the planet from sonic backlash. I should probably tone down the speakers a little, now that I think about it.” ‘Oh, please, you and I both know how easily you could fix it. Either way, I wasn’t gonna touch it.” Essence held up her hands. She looked around before turning back to Umbra. “I’ll be back later.” She disappeared. “Crazy-ass woman. Cute ears, though,” Umbra shook his head before turning back to what he had been doing. Some would’ve been put off with seeing a woman jumping around in the desert with flames licking at her clothes, luckily for A, no one tends to wander around the desert. With a fair bit of surprise she somehow managed to fall on someone who was wandering around a desert wasteland. “Fade damn it all,” came a voice from underneath her, “ Why do I always get landed on? I need to talk to Umbra about this BS.” “Maybe it’s because you’re so doggang comfy!” She rolled backwards off from the voice that had come beneath her, stretching out onto the sand. Essence sat up and started messing with her tail. After clearing it of sand, she looked over to A. “Hello, I guess.” “BZZZT, wrong answer, care to take another try or would you like to use a lifeline?” “Lifeline. Help. I’ve fallen and I can’t get up.” “You’ve fallen!? Oh no, I’d love to help but I’m a bit busy making sand angels while I wait for the other guy.” A was actually making sand angels, her dress somehow remaining remarkably clean and her hair almost untouched. “Cool. I’d love to make some but-” she started before being interrupted by a musical tune. “Oh. Guess I can.” Essence laid down in sand next to A. “Whee…” Fifteen minutes later the both of them had gotten bored. Well, one of them did. “Okay I’m bored now.” A said rather abruptly, standing up and shaking her head slightly. Essence, on the other hand, had already been sitting up for a good seven minutes. “Ooh fluffy!” OH DEAR GODDESS. She saw my tail…  Essence thought, aloud. “Yes she did!” A laughed and pounced onto the fluffy anomaly, arms outstretched as she practically willed herself to pet it. Essence dodged and ran off only for A to quickly pounce after her again, whiskers appearing on her mask as she curled up slightly “Lemme pet your tail kitty!” “No! It’s sensitive!” “You shan’t escape my grasp thou fluffy beast! Huzzah!” A twisted herself slightly as she landed, smirking as her deft turn enabled her to tackle Essence barely, pinning her onto her front as she tried to pet the tail with one hand, nuzzling against Essence’s cat ears as well “Victory is mine, now submit!” At this moment another figure had come into view, immediately facepalming as he realised what was happening. “Oh dear Origin, A, you’re a moron.” Decidedly, it was at this moment Z had pledged never to work with the golden guardian of good again. “And why in Equus would you go along with her… whoever you are?” Pushing A off of herself Essence looked up to him, A immediately returning to playing with her tail. “I'm Essence, The Musician, wielder of divinity, madness incarnate of the Void, reaper of tyrants, Bubble mistress, and The Last of the Influences.  You are?" “Currently I go by Z, eraser of the wicked and punisher of souls. And...” He groaned loudly as his attention turned to A who was trying to wrap herself in Essences tail. “I see you’ve met A. On behalf of my universe I apologise.” “It’s not as bad as it looks, I guess.” “Riiight. Sorry for intruding.” He calmly reached down and grabbed the back of A’s dress, the golden flames along it avoiding his touch as he started pulling her away. “I’ll be taking this one somewhere she won’t get in the way.” “Um… It’s kinda my fault to be honest…” “Really?” He dropped A, who was trying desperately to grab at the tail again, to the ground and pointed at her. “You’re saying this one-” “That’s me by the way!” “Didn’t try and grab at your tail?” His mask showed a look of casual disbelief and minor displeasure. “I mucked up a teleport, she landed on me, we made sand angels, and she saw my tail. I usually hide it.” “I… see… With a cautious lack of judgement I’ll be leaving then, oh and A? I will be reporting this.” For her part A had been mucking around with a sock puppet of Z, imitating him as he talked. Essence sneezed and an image floated away from her. “That’s new…” “None of my business. A, no eating her because she’s fluffy. I’m instigating rule list three-thousand, nine-hundred and sixty eight.” With that he walked towards the villain camp, he had more important things to deal with than an idiot and an unaccomplished cat. “Hey! I heard that.” Z halted slightly, looking towards Essence out of the corner of his eye before sighing and continuing forward. “I’ll have to inform the Origin the firewall requires an update.” “Um… That wouldn’t work… I have near same abilities as Umbra.” “I know, and my weapons are made with those like you in mind so I’m sure a firewall capable of blocking Sysadmins and those ranking higher isn’t too out of the question.” “Not a SysAdmin, nor higher.” “It doesn’t matter what you are, go peeking around my thoughts again and you will be erased” “Erase me, you erase over seventy trillion worlds. Probably more.” “And? You make it sound as if I hold any care for those worlds. No, as far as I’m concerned you can do whatever you like, just keep it away from me.” “Sometimes I peek by accident. And those worlds? They include yours.” “Then you clearly don’t understand what I meant by erased. Let me indulge you. It involves every single line of code, every strand of your soul burning away while anything you had an effect on will have no memories of you, nothing to show you ever existed, and every single existence you’ve ever created will simply think of some other reason for their origin.” “My code intertwines with so many worlds that it would cause around… 3 fourths of the multiverse to end. Do you really wish to create such havoc?” “There’s a difference between wanting to create havoc and wanting to erase someone. But yes, I would still go through with it and I would also not be held accountable for the destruction of those worlds, as I have already stated, no one would know I killed you if no one remembers you.” “... Need I say it? I’m connected to the entire Multiverse. Even a small amount would effect your world. And small can be big. Imagine. Music never existing. Science never existing, can you?” Z simply chuckled as he faced away. “As I’ve said, you simply aren’t connected to our universe. Tell me, when did you make such connections? A billion years ago? A trillion? An infinitesimal amount of eons ago?” “I said I was the Last Influence? I’m the first created. I was there when coding was made. Every code had me attached to it. I am part of the code. Each microscopic piece of code? I’m in it. Even custom coding.” “Then I’ll give you a hint, look into my code and tell me what you see.” Essence peered at him, meeting some resistance, bursting into flames for a mere second, before she looked down past the basic components. There it was. The smallest of connections but she didn’t mention it and due to it, the code ignored most of her actions. If she edited it, it would attack but otherwise… As this was happening, A was trying to swat at Essence’s tail. “Myaa!” The other two decided to ignore her. “Look at mine.” “I cannot, I was made only to serve my purpose and the ability to view the code is unnecessary.” “I’ll show you.” Z shook his head. “I have no need to see. You sound like you have knowledge that gives you a higher standing thus I’ll submit for now, but I’m still asking you to keep out of my head.” “I never said I would go inside your head again. I won’t go inside your head.” He nodded, setting out towards the villain camp once more. “Very well, break your promise and you’ll never be trusted by another of my kind.” His steps were light even though his gait was huge, his back being the only thing visible as he kept walking away. Essence looked after him, “If only he knew…” “Knew what?” A’s head was suddenly next to Essence’s. “Knew that you have a hatred for the Bookseller… or was that the Merchant? The Monopoly man? Mer-people in general?.” “Not quite. I do but this is a different secret.” “Hmmm, then is it because your cody wodey is all wibbly wobbly, timey wimey?” “Disturbingly accurate. Do you know what it means?” “I do, but do YOU know what it means?” “Yes, I do.” “Good, because I barely have half of an idea as to what it means.” The Hero Castle          With a flash of light a man landed in the entrance hall of the Hero Castle. He stood from his slightly crouched position. He raised his blade up and spoke. “Here I am,” was all he said. Auric Fulcrum: The Golden Sun, Leader of the Golden Dawn, Wielder of Eureka, The Golden Flames of Alchemy The Good Guy (Zero wouldn't be able to get in sight of this guy) (He’d end up Blinded by the Light ) Auric stepped out of the entrance hall to look at the Hero Castle. He whistled. “Wow. You’ve outdone yourself Umbra…” VWORPLE Thank you -Umbra VWORPLE Teridax glanced up, before his eyes glowed an extremely bright yellow. “He’s here…” Auric, having been exploring the impressive castle, got cold chills. Someone had mentioned him, someone close enough to make him feel their power, and he had a fairly good idea who. "Hello Teri."  Teridax leant back. “Good to see you, Auric. I was slightly worried you weren’t going to make it.” "So did I," he muttered. Auric still had no idea why his trip took quite so 'long'. A cat-eared girl poked in her head, "My bad. Probably from my universe breaking apart." Her ears lay flat on her head, betraying her emotions. Auric looked at the girl, to Teridax, and back to the girl. “What?” Teridax gave the impression of raising an eyebrow. “Well now. This is interesting.” He chuckled a bit. “Well, Auric, I’ll be the better Makuta, and give you one day to get settled in. It’s the least I can do. Then… then you’ll be mine. Good day, Auric Fulcrum.” With that, he lapsed into silence. “I appreciate that,” Auric nodded and entered the castle to call his forces and prepare. Umbra checked another tally adding to an already massive amount counting up the number of nods from Auric. Essence, who had appeared out of nowhere, handed Umbra a cup of coffee or tea. Cups are still on the fritz for her. “Here. I’ll be back later.” Auric had just entered the main hall to find the catgirl from before lounging on a throne and a crown sloppily placed on her head. “How the?” She lept from the throne. “Never did introduce myself properly, did I?” She curtsied. “I am The Musician. Number One rival of the Merchant himself.” “I really wouldn’t say that in front of this lot,” Auric said, leaning slightly away from her. Essence quirked, “They’ve lost family, yes? But they weren’t killed by The Merchant. My entire family, so many of my friends, and my entire universe were destroyed by him.” Auric sighed, “I suppose most of them can’t say that.” “Need help calling your forces?” she asked. “Erm…” Auric realized he would either have to get her help or Umbra’s in order to not waste his power. Umbra leaned towards his side but the girl before him was a mystery. He might as well accept. After all, it was best to know potential allies or foes. “I’m neither,” she stated simply looking him in the eyes. “I am the True Neutral of this War. Every war needs one.” She can read my thoughts? Didn’t I put a block on those at one point? he pondered. “Alright call them.” “Any preferred method?” “Not really,” he said. “Got it,” she said. Snapping her fingers, nothing changed. At least in the room. “Should do it,” she said. “Go ahead and look outside. I’ll be taking my leave.” With the sound of ting, she vanished. A floating, 3D music note floated where she was. When Auric looked outside he saw something shocking. A Golden Sun. Written on it were the words, “Auric’s here. Forces report to the castle.” “How in?” he muttered. Neutral Territory Essence looked into the pool again. Peering out into the Multiverse, something caught her eye. A few people that could help and wouldn’t be resentful. With that she jumped into the pool. The water rippled and she flew towards the first. A boy named Alexis. He was about to die by gunfire from a robber in a store. She landed, blasted him back with music, and pulled Alexis out of the world. What Essence didn’t know about that world was that it was her old vacation spot. A group of people saw her on the news and for weeks praised the old deity they thought she was. The Musician. After she had pulled him out, she landed in a Pocket Universe. She turned to Alexis. “Sorry about that. I decided to save you. Largely because I felt I could use your help,” she said. “My help?” asked the boy. “Yes. I will tell you later. For now, pick five powers from this hat,” she held out a top hat. “Alright,” he reached in and pulled out five pieces of paper. Ambient Resource Constructs- If he's got the material he can make It. Nobody Physiology- power to be entirely or partially nonexistent Supernatural Voice- Speaking causes strange things to happen Wing Blades- Wings made of extremely sharp metal Mythical Realm Lordship- Presiding ruler of a 'mythical' realm “Oh. Well, looks like I have to make you a mythical realm. The rest aren’t too hard,” with that she began humming and swirls of power surrounded Alexis. Wing blades sprouted from his back, his abilities and body changed, and she stopped. “There. Now go.” With that she pushed him out of the pocket universe and off he went. Moments later she found the second and helped her. Repeating the process a few more times, she returned through the pool. Villain’s Camp Teridax didn’t smile, but he gave the impression of smiling. “Brotherhood of Shadows, come to me.