//------------------------------// // Beyond the Door Lies... My Castle? // Story: Journal of an Alicorn Clone // by Tired Old Man //------------------------------// Okay. So, this door just opened up into Celestia’s bedroom. I am so confused right now, because I have opened and closed every door in her room, and not one has led to some spooky basement stairwell in her niece’s castle! Oh sure, there was a secret entrance that kind of looked like a hidey hole (note to self: use for hide and seek with my sister later), but that’s all! Opening the hallway door, I notice something missing: guards. Weird, because I usually see guards somewhere in the hallway at all times, especially guarding the doors to our bedroom during naptime! Wait, does this mean I’m alone? Nopony’s here to tell me I can’t do things… right? I wonder... Celestia, if you’re here, I’m getting into your secret snack spot! I know you really don’t want me in there, so if you wanna stop me, you better do it right now! ...Right… now! I-I’ve opened the door! These cupcakes are right in front of my face! >~~~< Elsewhere, in a different but equally familiar castle… “Sister, is something the matter? You’re spilling your tea on the table.” “I-I’m not sure why, but I feel remarkably perturbed right now, Luna.” “Is the tea not to your liking, Biggest Sis? I didn’t mess up your Moon Tea, did I?” “No no, the tea is fine, Luna Two. It’s to die for, but I just… I need to go.” “Sister, where are you going?” “You haven’t even tried the biscuits yet!” “I need to go check on something this instant. It’s for my peace of mind. I’ll be right back, okay?” “Very well, but don’t keep us waiting long. Littlest Sister here has worked hard on this lunch, you know.” “I promise, I’ll be quicker than lightning!” “Wow, you’re going to move faster than a thousand feet per second?!” “...Luna, you really need to teach her what a metaphor is.” <~~~> Oh. My. Goodness! I really am alone! I ate every last cupcake and nopony stopped me! I’m free, I’m free, free to do whatever I please! Folded bedsheets and neatly placed pillows? Ruffled and tossed about! Neatly organized regalia drawer? Nuh-uh, not anymore! I can be as messy as I want and no one will stop me--Oh hi Celestia! I guess I’m… not alone, am I? Also, you seem surprisingly calm even though I ate all of your secret cupcakes and ruined your bedroom! Huh? Dinner? But I already ate, so I’m not--okay, I guess we teleported to the dining table right this minute! And she’s bringing out… oh no. No no no no no! NOOOOOO! >~~~< “Okay, I must be going crazy. I could have sworn this room looked like a total and complete mess right now, but it isn’t. Everything is where it should be, my regalia drawer is still organized perfectly, and my cupcakes are still neatly tucked away behind the nightstand… so why did I think… “It must be the nerves. Paranoia, that’s it. Tia Two isn’t even here, so of course nothing happened… I hope she’s doing alright out there…” <~~~> A bowl of peas?! I hate peas! You hate peas! This punishment is way over the line! I refuse to open my tunnel for this choo-choo train! I would rather take a bath with you cleaning me again! ...Wait. I didn’t, uh, mean that at all! I can bathe myself, you don’t need to--whoa, it’s suddenly wet now! But of course it is, since I’m in the bathtub! ...I’m in the bathtub. She’s humming right outside the door, and it’s not a fun humming! Celestia, no! Not the loofah! That’s too much soap and--AAAAHHH I’m sorry I ate your cupcakes, just don’t scrub me with that lathered thing! Please! NOOOOOOoooooo... …Ah… Haa… is this… the stairwell again? Cadance? Is that you? Yeah, that door showed me things. Fun things, then nasty things! Peas, a mountain of peas and… and a sudsy loofah! It was horrible! Get me away from that… that monster of a door! Thank you. And yes, I’m still hungry. I’ll eat… so long as it doesn’t have any peas.