The young, gray woman sat hunched over in a folding chair gawking at the last oatmeal raisin cookie on the craft services table. She tapped her leg nervously as she shifted her gaze to the light brown, mustached man watching cricket highlights on his phone.
The girl decided that she’d interrupt the mustached man’s sports induced trance for what she perceived as a necessary question. “Is she still going through the show notes?”
“Of course she is, love. Either that or scolding Banner for his stupid ideas.”
“I don’t get why we’re even doing this show if she constantly thinks she can do this on her own.”
“I wouldn’t question a paycheck. How many anthropologists get to have a job with this much excitement anyway?”
“Speak for yourself, I could have stayed in the Coast Guard and at least felt like I’m doing something meaningful while I’m getting yelled at. And you wanna talk excitement—”
“Ay. Stop. I don’t need to hear war stories from a twenty-seven year old girl. You haven’t seen nothing until you been into combat. Why, back in Shahi-Kot—”
“Oh here we go, you get to—”
Daring’s door opened in a flash to silence the squabbling coworkers. The not particularly happy woman to walk out was not in the mood for bickering between cast members, especially after having to chew out Banner for suggesting that they investigate alien abduction accounts. “I hired veterans because I wanted no-nonsense experts. Instead I get a bunch of interns that constantly feel the need to out-do each other. We’re on in five so quit arguing and get in place.”
Blazing Banner walked out shortly after her, looking quite humbled. “Skepticism McBoringpants over there is in a bit of a bad mood today.”
“Did you call her that to her face?” asked Constable Courage as he put away his phone.
“Maybe.”
“Yeah, that’d be right. You sheilas better get your pitches into shape. Especially you Daisy, I think boss is expecting a lot from you this time around.”
The colleagues walked to the monitors on set. Daisy’s dread caused her to swallow her gum on the short walk.
Despite the fact that graphics could be added in later, every one of them displayed something. They each brought up their chosen story. Daisy swallowed as she nervously opened any and every page she thought might be necessary to explain herself. Nobody on staff was fond of second takes or errors.
A voice from off set was barking orders which nobody really acknowledged. Daisy terminated the visible look of anxiety on her face while the rest of the crew’s more subtle hints of uncertainty where similarly suppressed.
Daisy had to distract herself from the worry. She knew she had everything prepared and had no reason to doubt herself this time so she let her mind wander. She looked at each of the crew and then remembered what Banner had said. Daisy chuckled to herself, looked at Banner, and whistled a tune familiar to any fan of fictional FBI agents.
“Aww hell, really Daisy?”
Daisy’s chuckle turned into full blown laughter and even Constable snickered.
Daring Do face palmed and ran her hand up her face and through her hair concealing a slight smile as well as setting up for a rarely seen moment of whimsy from her.
“You shouldn’t make fun of Banner so much. You never know when aliens are watching” joked Daring as she prominently cupped her hands in front of her while her hair still stood up from her face palm.
Banner blushed while Daisy was practically on the floor, however they had officially exited Constable’s reference pool.
Banner was quick to defend himself. He was usually okay with not being taken too seriously but when everybody ganged up on him, he had to get the last word. “They’re here! I’ve seen them! We’ve all seen them on the news! Why not—”
“Shut up!” echoed the other three.
All four quickly regained composure as the countdown began. The lights were bright and the previous scrambling slowed to a crawl.
“In five, four, three, two…”
“Let’s start off with you, Constable,”
“Ah. Save the best for first I suppose. I have on my monitor, evidence that the legendary Thylacine still exists. A Tasmanian botanist has found what appears to be the corpse of the tiger. A bit like that chupacabra case in Texas. Difference being, this is believable.”
“Is it believable, Constable or is it an excuse to take a trip down under?”
“Happy coincidence.”
“Banner, what stark raving mad suggestion do you have for us tonight?”
“Missing time. Lights in the sky. Unexplained radiation. What are all these things associated with you ask?”
“Do tell.”
“Aliens! More specifically, UFO sightings. I talked to several couples, each of whom gave a report that coincided very well with the others. All of them were traveling on I-80 a few miles south of Crystal City and witnessed two pillars of light in the sky. Two glowing objects then appeared out of the pillars and merged. These witnesses were all credible and quite shaken. All I ask is that you give it a chance. If not for the witnesses, then for planetary safety.
“Planetary safety, Banner? I don’t see what that has to do with lights over Crystal City. People have been reporting that for decades and it amounted to nothing. Daisy, it’s all on you now. If you mention the Loch Ness Monster, I swear…”
Daisy was a bit surprised that Banner’s story took place so close to her own. She hoped the fact that it was in the same city as her story didn’t discredit her at all. With thoughts fully gathered, she knew that this couldn’t be that much weirder than what Banner suggested. She was somewhat banking on Banner’s suggestion being significantly crazier than what she had.
“Funny he should mention Crystal City, Canterlot is where I found my story and it’s about ten miles out. As we all know, the Gemstones of Capri are some of the strangest objects in the world that we’ve found. In the local school grounds, an amateur geologist, who would like to remain anonymous, found what amounts to two gems with the exact properties of the Capri stones. Crucial difference: it looks like they were in the same shape as the ones in the museum but are now shattered.”
“Shattered? Those things are as hard as diamonds.”
“Yeah, it’s quite the mystery, Daring Do. Question is, is it a big enough mystery to wander into the epicenter of an alien apocalypse.”
“I suppose as long as we’re there, Banner can look into that as well. We’ll call it a dual investigation. Let’s roll.”
“Cut.”
“I have a good feeling about this. Nice job Daisy,” said Daring Do as she walked off set leaving the gang of three to discuss their plans for the first dual investigation of the show. All three of them were fairly satisfied. Constable’s stories have already been chosen for four of the last six investigations so even he wasn’t going to complain when everything went well in one take and Banner was just happy that he’s getting a chance to pursue his minor obsession.
After a cautious acknowledgement of success passed between the three, Constable broke the silence between them. “So, how do we wanna start this?”
“I propose we find a connection. I’ve always speculated that the gemstones might not be from Earth. I always just figured they were meteoric, but this opens a whole world of possibilities.” Banner already had a few ideas.
What Banner said would fit in with most of his kooky theories but Daisy and Constable couldn’t help but consider the possibility of some sort of natural phenomena that could connect both the gemstones and UFO sightings. This didn’t stop Constable from being dismissive on all counts. “You and Daisy can go and investigate your crazy theories and if by some miracle you manage to find a connection…I don’t know. You get a biscuit.”
“Umm, why am I going on Banner’s trip through the wormhole? The gems were my story. I should get to investigate,” said the headstrong woman.
Constable hadn’t considered it before, but he may actually have to go UFO hunting with Banner. Teams were usually split boy-girl to investigate separate parts of single investigation both because their qualifications were best split that way and it was just the formula for this type of show. Now he found himself in an awkward position. Daisy was more qualified for the gem investigation and Daring Do was not about to investigate the oogy-boogy B-story.
Constable raised a finger and paused. “Damn. You may be right.”
Banner’s face lit up at the opportunity to proselytize the art of the conspiracy to Constable. “Ahhhh, looks like you and me brah! Blazing Banner and the downer from down under: MUFON investigators.”
“Whatever that is, I’m not one.”
Promptly ignoring Constable’s comment, Banner started crafting Constable’s road trip from hell. “We’re gonna drive over to Crystal City, pick up some baconators, listen to some Countess Coloratura, talk about some football. And I mean like real football. Like with helmets and shoulder pads.”
Banner walked away with Constable under his left arm leaving his right free to gesture towards the sky as he rambled on. Constable mouthed a clearly visible “help me” to Daisy. It was of no use. Daisy just giggled before she was called by Daring Do.
As she arrived in the room and took a seat, she checked to make sure her phone was silent. Daring Do was leaning back in her chair. The remains of shelled nuts were scattered across her modest table along with various documents and souvenirs from far away lands. The room’s walls were entirely covered in bookshelves with spaces in between for various little pieces of history. An antique doll from Papua New Guinea particularly creeped out Daisy.
“You called, Daring Do?”
“I wanted to discuss our plan for the Crystal City investigation. What did you have in mind? I assume you have all the necessary info,” said Daring as she cracked open the shell of a Brazil nut with without breaking the nut; nearly an impossible feat without the proper tool.
“Uh, I suggest we start at the contractor who found the gems, after that I think we should examine the grounds. It’s Canterlot High School’s so maybe we could ask some faculty and students if they’ve seen anything strange. Maybe before all that, we could get some fanfare in.”
“You know I hate that. But I guess if we’re gonna do it anywhere it may as well be there. We’re probably going to need to bring the gems too. We could have them on display at the meet and greet if we bring enough muscle. Bring some culture to that town.”
Daisy liked the plan, but more than that she liked the approval from Daring Do. She was a grown, accomplished woman, but at heart she was almost as big of a fan-girl as Rainbow Dash.
She walked out of Daring’s office and picked up the last oatmeal raisin cookie on her way out of the studio. It tasted like victory.