//------------------------------//
// Putting the "Good" in "Goodbye" 
// Story: Grandpa HATES Equestria 
// by ColossalParadox 
//------------------------------//

	"I've done it, everyone! After months of extensive research, I have finally figured out how to send Grandpa back to his own world!"

Twilight stood before her friends in the Castle of Friendship, her announcement an apparent shock to all those gathered. None of them seemed to be disappointed however. More so they were too ecstatic to say anything. It was hard for any of them to say that they would miss Grandpa, but they did have a few decent times. But now, it was finally time to say goodbye.

"Alrighty then, let's go fin' Grandpa and tell 'im th' good news," Applejack declared, gaining nods of approval.

"Quite right, it is about time we sent him home back to his own family so that he can... stop harassing ours..." Rarity added, dreading the months it would take to purge her little sister's mind of all the naughty words Grandpa filled it with. Rarity huffed and blew a stray strand of hair out of her face.

"Right, and the sooner it happens, the better," Twilight agreed, "Now, all of you go find Grandpa, and I'll get the spell ready."

All the mares in the room nodded and set out to hunt down Grandpa and bring him to Twilight. They figured it wouldn't be that hard. All they had to do was look for the ponies running away from something and go that direction.

Easy as cake.




Finding Grandpa was easier than cake, thanks to his loud and boisterous nature. The five mares had corralled him back to Twilight, who was ready with the open portal. Grandpa stood before it, adjusting his glasses to get a better look, already been made aware that this was his ticket back home. The portal swirled in a clockwise motion, suspended in midair, and could only be seen from one side. Its colors consisted of light blue with a greenish tint, its structure continuously fluctuating.

"Holy hell, this reminds of that one bad PCP trip I had," he said. The girls all groaned one last irritated sigh.

Grandpa turned around to them, their faces one of untainted happiness. Pinkie was the only one who really smiled at him and waved while the rest opted to just waving. Grandpa sniffed and lifted his middle finger at them.

"Fuck ya'll, I'm out."

And with that, he promptly turned back to the portal and fell into it. Grandpa screamed as he tumbled through the brightly colored void, the entire time Vietnam and Woodstock flashbacks appeared in his mind as he continuously tumbled, tumbled through a rip in time and space. Finally, Grandpa impacted something solid and blacked out.




Brandon Rogers jolted awake in his bed and looked frantically about his room. He was still there, still alive, and definitely not Grandpa or in a world of technicolor talking ponies. He wiped his face and found that he had been sweating profusely even though he had slept nude. He blew out a sigh of relief and fell back down onto his pillow.

"Phew! It was just a nightmare," he said to himself, relaxing back into his bed and trying to fall asleep again.

"I wouldn't be too sure about that..." A voice said to his right.

Brandon's eyes shot back open and turned his head to the right. There sat a purple alicorn, the one known as Twilight in his dream, reading a book. She scratched her chin in concentration as she read through the tome.

"I think something went wrong with my calculations," she said to herself.

Brandon gripped the covers, turned his head back to the ceiling, and screamed until the sun rose. 

His nightmare had just begun.